James turned to where Lily had stooped down to pick up some trash and walked over to her. When she stood up, he took the trash from her and threw it into the nearest rubbish bin.
"Thanks," she sighed, looking around. The mess which had been almost immeasurable could now be considered somewhat tame.
"No problem," his eyes never left her face. Lily was thankful for the dim lighting because she was feeling the color rise in her face.
James gently placed his fingers under her chin and turned her to face him. Their eyes met, and Lily's stomach did flip flops against their liking. She couldn't like James Potter, he was a … a….
She couldn't think of what he was. All she could think about was how close she was standing to him and how her nerves seemed to short circuit. To Sirius he was loyal and to Peter he was always there. Maybe Catherine was right about James's arrogant behavior, that it was all just some façade that he put on to protect and entertain himself.
"Lily," her knees shook a little as he said her name. His eyes were boring into hers in such a way that Lily felt as if he was laying bare his entire soul for her to see. "Go out with me?"
Lily laughed, "You do know how to ruin a good moment, don't you?"
James chuckled as Lily added, "Do you ever give up?"
"Not with you," he replied, pulling her closer, his hands around her waist. Lily wasn't sure if she liked being so close to James, it made her heart beat fast and the color rise in her face.
He leaned in. Lily knew what was about to happen. She wasn't sure about how she felt. She didn't want to string him on to anything; she knew how much he liked her. Could she ever feel that strongly about him? It was a little scary thinking about how deep his affection for her ran.
She felt his breath on her lips, and right before his lips made the connection with hers she turned her head. His lips settled on her cheek. He pulled his head away and looked at her bowed head.
Lily felt something warm trickle down her cheek, and she didn't look up to meet James's gaze. She didn't have the courage to. She shook her head, quietly muttering, "I'm sorry," and turned to leave. He grabbed hold of her wrist, she stopped where she stood.
"Go with me to Hogsmede? Please," he asked again. His voice was different, he didn't sound at all like he usually did. He said it quietly and his voice shook a little with hope.
"I can't James…" she tried to keep her voice steady, but she heard it shake, "I can't."
"Why?" he asked her gently.
"I … I just… I don't want to hurt you…."
"You're hurting me now," he pointed out to her.
"But I do not feel as strongly about you as you do about me," she sniffled.
"That's okay!" he tried.
"No, it's not!" she looked at him, her eyes were red as she tried to keep in the tears. "It's not okay James. I can't just lead you on. It'll only hurt you more. I don't want that."
James looked into her red, blotchy, face. He didn't like to see it so sad, so confused and frightened.
"That's not what I meant," he took her hand.
"I know, James, I know. But for now please just be content with the fact that you have such loyal friends," she whispered, stepping backwards, their hands were still connected. James had no idea by what she meant, but took her advice all the same.
She turned to leave, her hand still clasped in James's grip. He pulled her back. They're faces were so close again that Lily could feel his breath on her face. He slowly pulled her hand to his lips and kissed it, "Goodnight."
Lily's breath was completely sucked out of her chest. She couldn't even say "Goodnight," in return, so she nodded her head and turned her back to him as she made her way to the Girls Dormitories. She felt James's eyes watch her retreating figure, and when she was safely behind the closed door, she took a deep breath and leaned her head against the wood in an attempt to calm herself down before she had to face Rini upstairs.
She couldn't explain her reasoning, but letting people know that she really did like James made her uncomfortable. Maybe it was because she had rejected him for so long and now she had changed her mind. Or maybe it was just the thought of how her former best friend would take the news of her dating his enemy. Lily didn't know; all she knew was that if she was truly going to go out with James, she was going to have to know, without a single doubt, how she felt about him.
guahahahaha i got your hopes up:P i win.
they get together really really soon. i promise.