Awkward? Was I feeling awkward? One thing was for sure, Kisame and Tsunade had been talking for a long time, or at least it felt like it. Konan and I sat in a small room; down about three or four rooms from the Hokage's meeting room. It was sparsely furnished and had only one window which was curtained.
"So do you know what Deidara's condition is?" She looked at me without turning her head.
"No," Konan nodded and looked away again. "But if Tsunade, the lead medic, is not with him I'm sure he's doing fine."
"Or he's dead," her gave returned to me, "I don't need comforting, I was just asking for information."
Cold! "So what are you doing here anyways, I thought you were the leaders right hand."
"I feel like that is the only thing anyone has asked me." She turned to face me. "Why do you think I left?"
"Well…" I had no clue what she was playing at. "Seeing your condition, perhaps Sasuke made you realize you were taking too many risks. He's uncontrollable and unpredictable, his presence increases danger for you."
She smiled, "well at least your train of thought is a bit superior to everyone else I've had to deal with since leaving. Or at least it is the best sounding."
I smiled, hoping I didn't look like an idiot. "Well that is why I left; the thought of orphaning my son was a bit too much."
Konan raised a slender eyebrow. "You have a son? Not too sound surprised but I would have never pegged you as the type to have a family. So did you marry someone from Konoha, or are you just here for a mission? I am well aware you are a Kirigakure native, is that where your family is?"
"No, I never married. Fuyu's mother left him to me when he wasn't more than a few days old. To be honest, I don't even know who his mother is."
Konan snorted. Oops, wrong thing to say.
"I mean…" now how the hell do I make that not sound bad?
"It's fine; I'm not asking you to explain yourself to me. Hell, I wish I didn't know the father of my own…"
I couldn't come up with a response…I didn't even know what she meant. After a minute of excruciatingly awkward silence, Konan stood up and walked to the window and pulled aside the curtain.
"If it weren't for whom the father was, I would never have had to leave."
"…" I couldn't tell if she wanted to talk about this or if she was just lost in her own thoughts…women are so complicated. Luckily I was saved by a knock at the door.
"Hey, Lady Tsunade is ready to see Konan now."
"Very well." Konan left, and as she walked past she rested her hand on my shoulder for a second, silently thanking me for listening…or understanding…or at least thinking I understood. I don't know, but it was appreciative and peaceful. I smiled.
…
A mission?
I honestly did not mind the mission so much as the fact that Hidan took it without consulting or at least informing me first. The fact that Sasuke was already usurping me was disturbing; I had hoped to hold off any major moves by him for a while longer. Now it is only a short matter of time before he attacked Konoha. Whether this is by Sasuke's will or Orochimaru's, there is no doubt that it would come to pass.
The mission? The mission was to recruit another one of Orochimaru's old subordinates, a young ninja by the name of Kabuto. The mission honestly didn't bother me in itself, I just feared what lay in its wake.
…
"Stay here, I'll come back after speaking to Lady Tsunade."
"Okay."
I left, knowing I had already sided with Itachi. While I had trusted every Hokage I had seen preside over the village, I wasn't stupid enough to trust the elders. They were stuck in there old ways, their decisions stuck in the dark ages of Konoha's founding. I didn't doubt for a second that Itachi had been ordered, as barely more than a child, to kill the Uchiha clan. If this was true, it meant he would be cleared of every indictment against him, meaning he would be free to assist us in taking out the Akatsuki. But there was problem. In order to prove this we would need to get into the high security documents, which can only be viewed with the consent of the Hokage and all of the elders. I needed to speak with the Hokage to confirm I did not miss any loophole that could prove his innocence without the consent of the elders, which is something that would never come to pass no matter how long they lived.
…
Smooth, yielding flesh under my lips, my tongue, my fingertips. Shallow breaths in my ear, a shaking hand on my shoulder. I moved my mouth from his neck to his chest, running my fingernails down his bare back, sliding my hands into the back of his pants and pulling him closer.
"S-Sasuke…" Suigetsu trembled as he spoke. I was positive he had started crying.
Suigetsu…I'm sorry.
"What do you want?"
That isn't my voice, these aren't my words.
"Sasuke…"
I smiled. Whether that was his answer or not, I wasn't satisfied. I looked him in the face, sharing our very breath, as I slipped my hands around his waist and began unfastening the front of his pants. I pushed them over his hips and grabbed his member, rubbing and pumping instantly. Suigetsu squeezed his eyes shut and gasped, his hand gripped on my shoulder and his hips bucked. I stepped foreword, pushing him against the wall and forcing my mouth onto his.
"Now tell me, what do you want?" I whispered into his ear breathily.
"P-please," he pushed against my shoulder now instead of grabbing it.
Suigetsu…I'm…I can't…
"What," I ran my hand up over his stomach, rubbing the still raw scar I had just finished healing roughly, "do you want?" Our eyes met for a second time and now Suigetsu stared into mine, terrified at what he saw. "Sasuke is buried too deep now…You cannot reach him."
Suigetsu's wide eyes remained locked with mine for a moment longer before I savagely kissed him. He pressed himself farther against the wall, as if trying to escape through the solid stone. After confirming he could get away from me, Suigetsu merely stopped moving and let me take over completely.
Moving to the bed I removed my pants, smiling at how Suigetsu looked away, tears running down his cheeks and just laying there waiting for whatever I wanted to do. I leaned foreword, placing myself over him as I placed slight pressure at his entrance.
"Suigetsu, do you want me to fuck you?"
He swallowed, still keeping his eyes away from me. I smiled and pushed in slowly, stopping when he closed his eyes. Then, all at once I drove the rest of my length into him as far as it could go. Suigetsu cried out and gripped the sheets, breaking his hush only made more blood rush to my sex. I grabbed his bangs, clearing them from his face and forcing him to look directly at me. My grin became painfully wide. I thrust in again with just as much force as before. Suigetsu moaned and writhed, I could only imagine that his not completely healed incision mixed with the painful man made affliction I set upon him was ravishing him with pain. I grabbed his sex with a firm hold and began pumping in time with my thrusts. Suigetsu, with his eyes squeezed tightly shut came between us. With this satisfaction I finished. I pulled out and sat back watching as he slowly opened his eyes and looked at me. Fear, hate, sorrow, loss…it was all there.
"Till next time." I got up, assembled my wardrobe and left without looking back. The same smile still stretched my face as I returned to my work.
…
"Your brother should return from his mission any day now, Suigetsu." She turned, violet eyes framed with silver lashes gazed adoringly down at me. "I should return before your father though, it is just a routine assassination after all."
"Can I go swimming?"
"Yes, just make sure you practice with Ran-sensei every day." She finished tying on her headband, the same I would wear when I reached the appropriate level. I liked the way it pressed her white-blue hair to her skull, the same way her ANBU uniform still let know she was a woman. She knelt in front of me smiling benevolently, I handed her the mask I had been holding. "I love you Suigetsu, and I will see you soon."
"I know mom."
Mom…mother. Her name…it was Miho…the most beautiful name in the world…Miho, Death's Pale Paramour…Mistress Murder of the Mist…mother.
Should I have just gone home?