Chapter 21: The Prize at the Bottom of Every Vodka Bottle

Beverly Hofstadter leaves the hospital so Leonard can finally get some rest, but she stops by the bathroom to release more painful tension by crying in the stall once more. Her emotions getting the better of her again, Beverly decides she really should clear the air with Penny before returning home. She walks out to the curb and calls for a cab. She tells the taxi driver to take her to the Cheesecake Factory where Penny works.

Behind the bar at the Cheesecake Factory Penny is serving out drinks when Beverly walks in looking for her. Penny freezes and tenses up nervously at the sight of her boyfriend's mother approaching the bar. After their painful conversation on the phone earlier Penny figures she is in for another heartbreaking tongue lashing and critical analysis of her identity. She takes in one anxious breath of air trying in vain to calm her nerves. She pretends to absentmindedly wipe down the bar in an effort to appear busy.

Beverly: "Hello Penny."

Penny nods shyly back at her too afraid to speak up yet. Her hands begin to tingle and perspire, her stomach turns nauseous and Penny feels the sudden urge to pee or perhaps vomit. She quickly grabs a large bottle of vodka from behind the counter, pours herself a shot then gulps it down in one swallow. She thinks to herself this must be how Raj feels around women all the time.

Beverly: "I went to see Leonard. We had a nice long talk and he made me realize that my behavior towards the two of you has not been the most congenial. So I came here tonight to apologize for my comments to you earlier. I've been a bit out of sorts for awhile and now with this accident….well it just sent me right over the edge. I was cruel to you Penny and I am truly sorry for any emotional suffering that I've inflicted upon you. "

Penny can barely believe her own ears right now. Did Beverly Hofstadter actually just apologize to me? This can't be happening. I must be dreaming. She pours herself another shot and sucks it down before speaking to Leonard's mother.

Penny: "Really? Wow, so you're not here to just rip my head off?"

Beverly sighs sadly, holding back the tears again and feeling a great sense of remorse for her actions.

Beverly: "The causality of events that transpired prior to Leonard's accident was not predetermined by you and therefore could not possibly have been the result of any malice or unjust motive on your part. I know you care about my son Penny. I shouldn't have insinuated otherwise. He told me you were the first person to come see about him and that you finally said you love him. I am just sorry that I didn't come sooner to do the same, but I told Leonard that from now on I'm going to try harder to be more supportive of him and his decisions, including his relationship with you."

Penny is shocked and bemused by Beverly's sudden change of heart. She is not quite sure how she feels about it, but for Leonard's sake Penny decides to give his mother the benefit of the doubt for the time being. She nods her head respectfully then Penny downs another shot of vodka and clears her throat. That last shot finally gives her enough confidence to open up about what she has been feeling lately.

Penny: "Yeah, well I'm sure Leonard will love the support. Thanks for the apology, but to be honest Beverly I feel like this whole mess has become sort of a blessing in disguise."

Beverly's forehead wrinkles up when she hears this from Penny. She adjusts the glasses on her face and stares at her.

Beverly: "How so?"

Penny: "Well almost losing Leonard helped me come to terms with the truth. He is the one. I wasn't sure before that I wanted his kind of a emotional commitment in my life, but life has a way of just hurling cats in front of your car and changing your whole perception of things. It's like with that Schrodinger guy's cat too I think. You don't know whether the cat is alive or dead until you open the box. Well I opened it up! I told Leonard how I feel about him and instead of feeling like my life is over like I thought I would I feel more alive than ever. I don't want this life to end and even though I'm still not sure what's going to happen in my future knowing he can still be in it makes me okay with that. More than okay really… I feel excited again and I haven't felt truly excited about anything in a really long time."

Beverly: "Fascinating! You're handling this all a lot better than I ever thought Penny. I hate opening up about my feelings too. As a psychiatrist I've been trained to avoid discussing my own emotions so I can better focus on analyzing the feelings of others. But, truthfully it doesn't make things any easier bottling everything up so much. Sometimes, you've just got let it all out. I've made a lot of mistakes in my life, but Leonard isn't one of them. He's a good boy and I should have treated him better growing up. I should have treated all my children better. Now my family thinks I don't care about them, but that's not true. I care too much and I know what it is like to lose family. It breaks my heart and I just don't like losing control over my emotions. How are you able to open up so well Penny?"

Penny: "I don't know. I just drink a lot!"

Beverly: "And that helps?"

Penny: "Oh yeah! Would you like a drink?"

Beverly finally cracks a small smile.

Beverly: "Yes. Yes, I think I would. What would you recommend?"

Penny pulls out another shot glass for her then pours Beverly a shot of vodka.

Penny: "I think you just need relax Beverly, let your hair down a bit. Over thinking about everything only makes it more complicated than it has to be. I tell Leonard that all the time. Here try this."

Beverly picks up the shot glass and looks at the liquid in it as if it's some magical elixir that can help make all her problems with her family go away. She downs the shot in one swallow and then looks at Penny.

Beverly: "Another! Please!"

Penny smiles and pours Beverly another shot, this time a mixture of Vodka and cranberry juice. Beverly drinks two more shots in a row and finally starts to feel her inhibitions lowering again.

Penny: "So is it working?"

Beverly: "YIKES! YES!"

Penny grins at her and then checks the time on the clock up over the bar. Her shift ends in fifteen more minutes. Her assistant manager Fred knows she's going through a tough time right now and he has always had a bit of a crush on her so she figures she can get away with drinking on the job just this once. She always feels much more comfortable talking with Beverly when she's drunk anyway so Penny pours them each another shot. Penny and Beverly hold up their glasses and clink them together happily as they finally begin to bond with one another.

Penny: "Beverly, can I ask you something?"

Beverly replies in a slurred voice "Sure, sweet cheeks go ahead!"

Penny: "Do you think the locust of my identity will ever be interior to me?"

Beverly: "I don't know, maybe! Locusts can be tricky little buggers. Try an exterminator, one did wonders with the termites in my dry wall."

Penny looks at her confused for a moment and then giggles.

Penny: "You know. You're alright Beverly."

Beverly: "Back at ya, kid!"

Penny smiles, holds up her shot glass in the air once more and knocks it against Beverly's glass again as the two of them continue their alcohol induced gabfest.

Author's Note: Yoo...hoo…anyone still there.!? LOL I am so sorry that it took me so long to get back to this story. I've had a lot of other life stuff going on of late and well instead of boring you with the details I just wanted to let you all know that I'M BACK! So I hope ya'll enjoy reading this latest chapter. There is lots more to come soon and I'll get back to working on Return of Princess too ASAP! Thanks and Take Care :)