Note: I've finally planned most of this out and there will be one more chapter after this one. It's sad coming to an end with this story, but I hope that between these last two chapters it will be a satisfying end for you. Thank you again to everyone for all the reviews last time around! Between midterms and papers, it's taking me a while to find writing time, so I really appreciate you guys sticking around despite the time between updates.
Step out the door and it feels like rain
That's the sound, that's the sound on your windowpane
Take to the streets but you can't ignore
That's the sound, that's the sound that you're waiting for
~One Republic – "All Fall Down"
Several weeks later...
With a frustrated sigh, she gave up. This was clearly not happening. No matter how much she pulled or twisted or adjusted, it just wasn't. And she'd already searched high and low for the box she needed, and located it...high. It was near the top in a stack of storage containers they'd piled in a spare closet some time ago, and it was definitely much heavier than anything she was allowed to lift. It was obvious that she'd have to get Eric, and yet she was stalling for equally obvious reasons.
Smoothing her shirt down to its full length, she padded into the hallway, down the stairs, and into the kitchen. His eyes met hers over Aubrey sitting at the breakfast nook and he smiled at the sight of her. With black dress pants and a shiny button-down, she looked almost ready for the day, but her hair was wet, the pants practically dwarfed her tiny bare feet, and her shirt was untucked, draping down.
"Hey," he uttered.
"Hi." She grinned shyly, leaning to the side to rest against the doorframe. "I need something."
He tilted his head playfully. "What?"
"One of the storage boxes," she explained vaguely.
"Which one?" he asked, eyes prodding hers along. There were a bunch in the spare room, several in the garage...
"The one with all the clothes I packed up a while ago..."
"Clothes," he repeated, almost a question, and raised a brow. She hadn't unpacked anything in there for years.
"Yes." She smiled again, far too pleadingly, and he eyed her further. Laying her head against the frame, she gave in a little. "I need pants."
"Pants." He nodded once, trying to understand.
"Yes... Why are you repeating everything I'm saying?" She rolled her eyes, playfully annoyed, and waited on him.
Coming out of it a little, he eased back into his chair and scooted Aubrey's oatmeal closer to her with the hope that she'd focus more on it than on the book she was engrossed in. "'Cause I can," he teased. "I think those boxes are up in the extra room."
"I know..." She bit her lip, not at all familiar with this process. "I already found it. It's just that it's very high and very heavy..."
He really did have to give her credit for the most vague way of admitting she needed help. While wanting to do things for her wasn't new at all, the adorable, regretful look on her face at having to ask him to was - and he was enjoying it, shamelessly. "Oh, so you need my help?"
"Yes," she practically groaned, straightening and toying with the hem of her shirt again. When he finally got up without question, she thought she was home free.
And then, as he eyed her with a playful gleam in his eye, he asked, "Why do you need these pants? You have tons."
"I know." She looked off to the side as he reached her, hesitating. "But these are from right after I had Aubrey." His silence while he put two and two together was brief, but it felt so prolonged to her that it made her a little nervous. A moment later her eyes darted back to his, anxiously admitting, "I can't zip my pants."
Chuckling immediately, his eyes dropped to her stomach, where he hadn't yet detected a change, but her clothing evidently had. "Already?"
As he grinned, his eyes were practically sparkling because now, when they'd been prepared for the worst, everything this time was proving to be so completely different. Where dwindling hormone levels had left her nearly symptomless last time around, every day was a constant reminder with this pregnancy. She was dog-tired in the evenings and nauseated in the mornings - or anytime she let her stomach get too empty, much to her dismay. And even despite her utter refusal to simply accept this, she'd slowed down. It was kind of amusing to see her changing in so many ways she wouldn't even acknowledge, but this...this she would have a hard time ignoring.
She playfully narrowed her eyes on him and he realized that hadn't been the best response. "Well I can't stop eating," she defended, thoroughly failing at being truly annoyed with him when he had that look in his eyes.
"I know." Still grinning, he drew in closer, fingers running along the hem of her shirt before playfully slipping beneath. "Bananas, anything with tomato...tomato soup, spaghetti sauce, chili, ketchup..." His fingers skimmed over her skin, and when his eyes followed he only grew more amused by the whole pants situation - the pants that hugged her curves with just enough give literally everywhere, yet were about an inch shy of meeting low on her abdomen. He couldn't help the almost silent laugh that escaped him as his hands danced over her skin.
She held his eyes and smiled, letting them give in to this moment just briefly, and then quickly returned to the annoyance over him being entertained by her wardrobe issues. "It's not funny," she warned, though her eyes were still alight. "I'm going to weigh as much as you."
And then, when he only laughed more and ran his fingers up higher on her stomach, she pushed his hands away from what she perceived as a little weight gain. "Would you stop?" Pulling the shirt back down, she smiled – and sighed. "I just need pants."
Aubrey had only been halfway paying attention to them, but suddenly she was pursing her lips and studying them. "Did you eat too much?"
Marveling at her innocence, Calleigh held Eric's gaze for a little longer. "Yeah, I did," she answered, feigning a frown as she took a few steps toward her daughter. "Way too much."
"You could lay on the couch," Aubrey suggested, shrugging. "Ooh, and watch Cinderella! That makes my belly feel better."
Taking in a prolonged breath, Calleigh sighed it out and ran her hands through Aubrey's damp hair. "I'll have to try that. Thank you, baby." Cradling Aubrey's head in her hands, she gently tipped it back to meet her eyes. She smiled, kissed her daughter's forehead, and rested her head there for a moment. "Be good while I help Daddy, okay?"
Aubrey grinned. "'Kay."
Eric was still smiling at the irony of her helping him when his hand found the small of her back as she brushed by. He led her up the stairs, fingers trailing up and down her spine as a slightly tension-filled silence overcame them.
"You do know we'll have to tell her soon, right?"
She smiled sadly, crossing her arms over her chest once they were in the rather empty room. This was exactly what she'd been putting off – acceptance and all the potential joys and losses that came with it. Her blood work had come back perfect, with hormone levels that were more than doubling at the appropriate rate, and when it really came down to it she felt pregnant, yet she hadn't let it become real for her. She hadn't truly given herself over to the idea because in that there was the risk of being disappointed, of disappointing others.
And so she'd been dreading today instead of counting down the hours, had been having dreams filled with empty ultrasounds and silence instead of a tiny silhouette and a pounding heartbeat. She was scared – terrified, really – and it was simpler to keep that between her and Eric until she was out of the 'danger zone' than to share it with a barrage of hopeful family members.
Sighing, she watched him slide the top box onto a nearby shelf, lift the one underneath it, and place it on the bed. "I know," she admitted, making a tiny noise of protest when he even opened the damn thing for her. "Maybe after today."
"Good." He smiled understandingly, though his eyes were full of a more realistic hope. Sliding his hand across her abdomen, he curved it around her hip to pull her close. "'Cause this is happening," he whispered playfully, kissing the corner of her mouth.
Her lips curved upward just a little and she placed her palm to his chest, remaining there as though if she waited, counting the steady drum of his heart beneath her hand, she could borrow a bit of his hope. And then he took her hand from his chest, weaved her fingers with his, and kissed her knuckles before he stepped away.
"Thank you," she called out after him, peeking out into the hallway to watch him go. When she turned back to the box full of clothes, she realized her palm had come to rest low on her stomach.
At first, Eric thought he was alone in the dim locker room. All was quiet save for the humming of an air conditioning unit somewhere in back. Then he heard the familiar buzz of a combination spinning, the metallic click of a handle popping up, and the creak of the door swinging open. As he rounded the corner to his locker, he found Ryan rummaging through his own.
Ryan looked up. "Hey." He smiled a little, his eyes showing the wear of a long day. "Headed home?"
"Yeah." Eric was smiling just as the thought. "Hey, thanks for handling that interrogation earlier with H. I had a family thing."
"Yeah, no problem." Ryan watched him spin the combination, tug on the handle, and pull his own locker open. "Everything okay? Where's Calleigh tonight?"
"Home." He smiled again, failing miserably at keeping it hidden as soon as he glanced inside his locker. "And yeah, everything's fine. I just had to be somewhere."
"She hasn't worked nights, or the field, in at least a month..." Ryan slipped an extra mag out of his holster and set it on the top shelf before turning, leaning against a closed locker. He was studying Eric carefully, concerned but also intrigued because he had a theory, and Eric was so much easier to read than Calleigh...
"Yeah... We're, uh, trying something new 'cause of IAB." He was trying to focus on slipping his blazer on and tucking his pistol back into its holster, but he turned towards Ryan a little, the beginnings of a smirk tugging at his lips even as he tried to offer a solid explanation. "If one of us works just the lab, we can still work together, keep the team together..."
Ryan smiled. This was just confirming his theory more. And okay, Ryan admitted, it was an obvious theory, but it was still just a theory nonetheless. He took in that smirk trying to etch its way across Eric's lips, thought of the calm that had settled over Calleigh in the past weeks, and on top of all the obvious evidence, he just knew.
"She's pregnant, isn't she?"
Before Eric turned into his locker again, Ryan caught a glimpse of a grin finally breaking out on his lips. That was answer enough, and when Eric moved to clip his badge back onto his belt, Ryan saw the newest addition to his locker: a three-by-five sonogram image pinned to the door, fuzzy but definitely distinguishable.
"Damn, you guys work fast," Ryan teased, studying the image before he pressed his locker door in until it clicked.
Eric chuckled, taking a moment for at least the tenth time that day to glance at it.
"That's amazing, man." Ryan patted his shoulder appreciatively. "Congratulations."
"Thank you." Eric sighed contentedly, pausing before he finally shut his locker. "Just don't tell Cal I told you."
"Told me what?" Ryan grinned, lifting his arms in a puzzled gesture as he took a few steps backward. "Have a good night."
He definitely would. "You, too."
Fifteen minutes later, he came home to a dimly lit house that smelled like chocolate chip cookies. The soft glow of the television in the living room would have led him in the right direction, but before he could even toss his keys in the bowl Aubrey came pounding down the hallway.
"Daddy!" He'd barely had time to shrug off his blazer before she launched herself into his arms. He lifted her the rest of the way up, settling her onto his side. "Momma helped me make cookies!"
"Mmm, I could smell them from outside. They must be good." He pressed his lips to her cheek, slightly distracted by Calleigh coming down the hall in a much slower fashion. She'd been favoring t-shirts at home lately, but now she had one of her little tank tops on, the material having to stretch further to still not quite meet the waistband of her low-riding pajama pants. He wasn't sure if it was because of what they'd experienced today, or because of her endearing, newfound acceptance of this all, or simply because she was now comfortable showing off the pregnancy a little, but suddenly he was taking in every little curve and change he'd dismissed before.
Between the pregnancy and the tempered down workouts, she'd regained some of her natural curves - in a good way. Her hips were a little softer now, with the same undeniably sexy contours he loved to trail his fingers - and lips - over, and he could finally admire and acknowledge the way her abdomen curved out slightly now instead of giving way to toned muscles. It was the slightest change, but it was everything.
"Hey." She smiled like they had some little secret.
"Hi." He grinned back because they did.
She knew they were just moments, but it felt like forever to wait through them. His hand curved around hers, her eyes locked with his instead of on every detail of what was going on. With his free hand, he tucked a stray lock of bright blond hair behind her ear and she watched him, waiting. She felt the very light glide of pressure over her abdomen, heard the white noise flowing from the machine.
With a slight swoop downward and the sound of movement, Calleigh's heart clenched. A quick, steady heartbeat filled the room and her eyes softened on his once relief flooded her. Swallowing down the lump of anxiety that had formed in her throat, she simply squeezed his hand and listened to the sound as though taking in every detail - and she was. She'd paused mid-breath to listen to each successive beat, to study Eric's eyes as he did the same.
She'd reluctantly prepared herself to never hear this again and yet here they were, reveling in the sound. He rested his head against hers and she felt the gentle sweep of his lips across her brow.
"Twelve weeks." The doctor's voice startled them a little, and when they looked up she was smiling knowingly. "You're definitely about twelve weeks along." She nodded toward the screen, where a blurred profile quickly captivated their attention.
"Twelve?" Calleigh's disbelieving eyes danced across the screen. She'd stopped doing the math, stopped trying to figure out how far along she was. She'd stopped counting days and weeks because she'd known she'd drive herself crazy with worry and building anxiety. Instead, she'd thrown herself into work, Aubrey, and Eric. She knew she'd been pregnant for a while, maybe even longer than she realized...but twelve weeks?
She glanced back at Eric, an emotional sigh escaping her lips as his thumb excitedly caressed hers. The steady beat drew her back in, though, and her eyes drifted back to the screen.
"Everything looks perfect," the doctor affirmed, panning back to the image of a profile.
Eric watched Calleigh carefully, expecting some delayed, controlled overflow of emotion, but she only swallowed it down hard before she smiled. "Good," she said simply, yet it held so much weight as she looked back at him.
Calleigh was still smiling when he leaned in, Aubrey tucked against his side, and pressed his lips to hers. A quick kiss turned into a little more when she laid her palm against his chest and his free hand graced the bare skin at her hip. He tipped his chin just slightly to really capture her lips, his bottom lip pressing firmly against hers.
"No. More. Kissing." Aubrey practically groaned, pressing her hands to her cheeks in dramatic horror.
Chuckling, Eric tore himself away and pried Aubrey's hands from her face. "What's wrong with kissing?"
"It's gross."
"I hope you think that for another twenty years." He tickled her stomach playfully, watching as she dissolved into a fit of hopeless giggles.
In between laughter and desperate gasps for air, she managed, "Are you going to eat cookies?"
"Of course."
"And then we can read my new book?" She looked at Calleigh expectantly, too.
"Sounds good to me," Eric said, hoisting her higher up for just a moment. "But only if you brush your teeth and get ready for bed first."
"Okay," Aubrey reluctantly agreed. When he playfully planted her on her feet, though, she was immediately scrambling up the stairs.
Eric cast his eyes on Calleigh again. "So…cookies?" He grinned, because while he'd been booking a guy for shooting a shop owner in Little Havana, Calleigh had been picking up their daughter and baking cookies in her pajamas. It all seemed very backwards for her.
She was pressing her lips together to fight a smile as she folded her arms over her chest and indirectly led him into the kitchen. "Brie really wanted some…"
He eyed her as she leaned against the counter. "Are you bored?"
"No, not right now," she answered honestly. Not when she was out of the field for this. "Maybe I will be after the baby is here, but I don't know. Right now I'm fine." The calm, happy smile that spread across her face let him know that was an understatement.
"Promise you'll tell me if you get bored?" he asked, a little gleam in his eyes as he entwined their fingers for long enough to place a kiss on her cheek.
"I promise."
He lingered there as she gave in to the realization that everything was different this time around. Everything. They were completely open with each other, and it was utterly overwhelming to feel so connected, to be having another baby amid it all.
Even after the tests had been positive, she'd almost given herself over to a life in which this didn't exist. Today had thrown her for a loop, and with her eyes cast downward at their hands she felt the emotions she'd denied herself earlier slowly creeping up on her. She'd held her composure amid some semblance of shock in the doctor's office, but now, at home, with him here, talking like this… It was overwhelming.
By the time she met his eyes again hers were glossy. He studied her questioningly and a shaky sigh escaped her. Smiling, she rolled her eyes at herself as a few tears spilled over onto her cheeks. "We're really having another baby," she whispered, taking a deep, steadying breath.
Eric nodded with her, an amused but adoring smile on his lips as he cradled her face in his hands. Wiping her tears away with the pads of his thumbs, he gave her a moment, but the tears continued to fall. "Yeah," he finally agreed, running a soothing hand through her hair to tuck it behind her ear. "We are."
She sniffled a little and swallowed hard, engaging a pointless war against the tears now freely flowing. They were falling faster than she could wipe them all away, and Eric had to try not to smile as he frowned sympathetically.
"You get an extra dose of hormones today?" he teased softly.
"Maybe." She sniffled again – and then laughed. This was ridiculous.
Eric sighed contentedly, pressing his palms to her abdomen – which really didn't help the crying. He let his hands glide outward to her hips and settled them there, holding her. After dotting a few kisses across the bridge of her nose, he rested his forehead against hers, reveling in all it meant for her to be looking back at him with open, honest tear-filled eyes.
"You okay?" he asked softly, palms smoothing over her hips.
"Yeah." She bit her lip, trying to control just how badly the hormones were intensifying her emotions. "I just…didn't let it be completely real for me until today."
Eric nodded, understanding. He knew this had been building up with every day she denied what was really going on. He just hadn't expected her to be such an adorable mess about it because she was never a mess about anything.
"I told you this was happening," he reminded her with just a discreet hint of cockiness.
"I know." She smiled hopefully, hooking her arms around his neck as she took in yet another steadying breath. When her eyes flickered back to his, she uttered, "I'm glad you were right."
His eyes softened on her and she pressed up onto the tips of her toes, pressing her lips to his with newfound hope. She tasted of salty tears and new beginnings, a potent combination, and he found himself both comforting and celebrating as he parted his lips for her. Her fingers wove together at the base of his neck, pressing him down to her in response.
"This house has too much kissing!" Aubrey broke them apart and Calleigh had to laugh at her exasperated, hands-on-hips stance in the middle of the kitchen.
"Believe me," Eric began, lifting her high up into the air before setting her on the counter beside Calleigh. "I think we'll all be very happy if that's your only complaint about growing up."
Aubrey pursed her lips, the meaning lost on her, but her entire demeanor changed when she noticed Calleigh's lingering glossy eyes, the dried tear paths leading down her cheeks… "Momma, why are you crying?"
"I'm okay, Brie," she assured, though she had to reconsider when her overly zealous, aggressive, stop-for-no-one daughter reached up to swipe away what was left of the moisture on her cheeks. "They're happy tears."
A look of recognition flashed in Aubrey's eyes. "Like during the movie?"
Eric raised a brow and Calleigh avoided his eyes. Instead, she smoothed Aubrey's hair behind her ear and whispered, "Hey, I thought that was our secret…"
Aubrey pressed her lips together. "Oops."
Amused, Eric set his sights on Aubrey. "What movie were you watching, Brie?"
Keeping her lips sealed, she glanced between them both, lingering on Calleigh shaking her head. "Secret," Calleigh reminded.
But Aubrey was biting her lip, tempted by Eric's encouraging smile. "But Daddy's good. We can tell him secrets, " Aubrey decided, smiling. "We were watching Enchanted, the one with the real fairy tale princess."
His laughter was immediate, and it earned him an equally immediate punch on the shoulder. Still, he kept at it, grinning and pressing a kiss to Calleigh's temple even as she playfully pushed him away.
"Enchanted…" He let it sink in as he moved around the kitchen, pouring himself a glass of milk. "Really, Cal?"
"You need to shut it," she demanded, though a smile was gracing her lips. "Has it been so long that you've forgotten the rules? You are not allowed to tease right now…" She eased herself up onto the counter and, despite the betrayal, pulled Aubrey into her lap.
"Okay, okay." He paused in front of the cookie container to throw his hands up in surrender, but he was still smirking. "I'll try."
She glared playfully as he piled himself a stack of what were probably way too many cookies. Aubrey, however, was thinking back, looking up at Calleigh and studying both her smile and her red-rimmed eyes.
"Why are you so happy?" she asked innocently.
It surprised Calleigh at first, but she sighed contentedly and wrapped her arms around Aubrey just a little more. She kissed Aubrey's hair and then rested her cheek there, taking in the moment…the three – well, technically four – of them there together.
"Because I'm with you and Daddy," she answered, meeting Eric's eyes from across the kitchen and smiling knowingly. She knew that look in his eyes, and with it came the sound of that heartbeat – a gentle, welcoming drumming that eased her mind and ignited her heart.