A/N: Amy's POV, this chapter is ALSO dedicated to the lovely tinkerbelldetention101, whose eagerness for a new chapter kicked me in the butt and got this one edited.

-C

Ever since Lily physically assaulted Vanessa in the common room, things had been a bit tense in general in Gryffindor Tower, but one love triangle in particular was so tense that I half expected another fight any moment.

Lily and Vanessa were watching each other like James, and each of them watching James, and James watching them both warily. And a bit wearily.

I think we were all a bit sick of watching, waiting, hoping something would either explode or everyone would get over themselves. And I wasn't an idiot. I knew that people included Sirius and me in that. But none of them understood, none of them knew how hopeless it was.

Sure, Lily had inspired a little bit of hope back in me, but it wasn't enough for me to make the first move. Did it matter that Sirius hated to admit that he was wrong?

What if he wasn't wrong? What if we understood each other perfectly and everybody else was just waiting for something that could never be? Or worse yet, what if our friendship had been destroyed forever by this perfect understanding, this finally knowing that I loved him with all my heart and he could never love me?

"This is sickening," Marlene finally hissed at me when we were studying in a corner of the common room. She nodded over at the almost visible line of tension between Lily and James, who were sitting in clusters with their friends about five feet apart. She rolled her eyes. "I just can't get why he doesn't man up and ask her out again. He's been doing it for years, and she's obviously interested. Or is he just that stupid?"

"Oh, Marlene," I sighed, "James is many things, stupid actually being one of them, but I think in this case he's very much afraid of rejection." Marlene snorted, but I shook my head. "No, really. He really wants to do it right this time, and unless he knows for sure she's going to say yes, he's not going to push it."

Marlene looked over them and said, "So why doesn't he ask her now?"

"If you were James," I said slowly, "do you think you could believe completely that Lily would say yes if you asked her out? Without a doubt."

"I guess you're right," she sighed with a shrug, turning back to her essay. "But it's getting so ridiculous."

The other thing about it that was getting ridiculous was how obviously Vanessa would try to get James to ask her out when Lily wasn't around. I half thought that she might try to rape him, but so far he seemed to be okay, and even better, undrugged.

I didn't want to deal with a drugged James Potter, not on top of everything else in my life.

Seventh year was supposed to be stressful, but nobody ever said it would fell like the sky was falling down around me and trying to choke me to death.

It was the worst when we were all together, eating dinner, and the tension between Lily and James alone could choke the whole room, but then Sirius would continue to stubbornly not look at me, which I only knew because of periphery vision because I continued to stubbornly not look at him as well. And still, I could feel him from the other side of the table, feel his subtle almost-gaze and I so badly wanted to know what he was thinking, if he knew and understand the raging inside of me at all the time I wasted thinking I had a prayer.

Not that I wasn't wasting my time now. But I could only mope so long.

Later on, I was stuck in the library, desperately trying not to fail my Herbology essay. And I overheard her.

"I've got this really sexy set of knickers I think I'm going to wear under my clothes at the next Hogsmeade day," Vanessa sighed in that way she did when she was teasing someone. I held my breath and leaned forward, hoping she wasn't doing what I thought she was doing.

"Do whatever you want," I heard James growl, clearly angry. "Wear whatever you want. I'm sure whatever sorry fool you end up shagging won't care either."

My eyes widened as I perked up my ears a bit more.

"James," she purred, "I can guarantee that you'd be pleased to see them. I can make sure you feel good."

"But you can't make me fall in love with you," James said softly. "Go away, Vanessa, before I have Madam Pince remove you for disturbing the studies of others."

"Think about it," Vanessa cooed, but I watched as she retreated out of the library, her face a cold mask of fury.

I sank into a chair, grateful she didn't see me, because I didn't need to deal with her on top of everything else, and since she'd set her sights so open and obviously on James she'd gotten a lot more nasty than she'd ever been before. Lily could take her on for all I care. She seemed to have a better right hook than me, anyway.

I was more than a little bit proud of James, though, through my own pain and annoyance. He was playing a very careful balancing act, and as awful as it was for those around him, it was more awful for him and he played it very well.

Suddenly, I knew I wasn't going to focus on Herbology at all so I put my books away, gathered up my parchment, and headed back to the common room, praying that Sirius wasn't going to be there so I could spend some time by the fireplace without feeling like the room might explode at any moment.

He wasn't there, but Lily and Vanessa both were, so I retreated to my dormitory just to be able to breathe.

Who would have guessed that a trachea could be so easily affected by interpersonal relations?

When Sarah came up later that night, still all aflutter about the fact that she was going on a date with Remus, I realized that I could not let it go on much longer without my intervention, knowing the way Remus was, so I told her I needed to get a headache potion and went to see Remus, who was playing chess with himself in the dormitory while Peter attempted to do his Muggle Studies assignment.

"We need to talk," I said. "Privately."

Remus flushed slightly, obviously aware of what I wanted to discuss, and before I could suggest that we take the conversation elsewhere, Peter scurried off.

"He does that," Remus said with a shrug. "Have a seat, Amy. What's on your mind? Is it Sirius?"

"Of course not," I snorted. "My love life is a lost cause, Remus, dear. I'm here on behalf of Sarah, who is currently going through her entire wardrobe making weather-based contingency plans for the next Hogsmeade trip."

Remus's eyebrow quirked in the way it did when he was pleased and trying to hide it.

"She is?" he said softly, a small grin turning up at the sides of his mouth. Suddenly, though, every indication that he was pleased disappeared and his amber eyes flashed with terror. He turned away from me, burying his face in his hands.

"Merlin, Amy, I'm such an idiot!" he cried. "I've let myself fall for her, let myself get caught up in the fact that a pretty girl wanted to date me that I've forgotten that she doesn't know! She doesn't know anything! What if I tell her and she runs?"

"I doubt she'll flat out run away from you, Remus, whatever happens," I said, slightly amused at the thought of this scenario, but Remus was less than amused.

"But Amy, I can't tell her! I can't tell her any of it, and how can she like me if she doesn't know it?"

"Remus you are not cancelling this date," I snapped, and I'd never spoken so sharply to him so he just blinked at me for a moment before nodding slowly.

"I wouldn't dream of it," he whispered. "I've been so excited since she said yes... I've actually started counting down days."

"Good," I sighed, glad that he'd not totally given up on the idea of having something with Sarah. Someone had to be happy, even if it wasn't me. "So what are you going to do?"

"What do you mean?" Remus asked nervously getting up and starting to pace in a way that reminded me painfully of Sirius.

I wished things would stop reminding me of Sirius, but I could even smell him, smell his body wash in the room. It was difficult, but I fought the urge to shut the bathroom door that someone had left open.

"Like, on the date, silly," I teased, watching his feet as he paced, trying to imagine that he was Sirius instead, that things were normal again and we were planning one of Sirius's many dates with girls who weren't me. "What have you got planned?"

"Oh," Remus sighed, laughing nervously. "Right. Well, Sirius has given me some notes. And while I know myself that Sarah doesn't like Zonko's, the idea of taking her to that tea shop scares me."

"Do it anyway," I assured him. "She loves it there, and she'll be impressed that you're making the effort." I hesitated. "But Remus, you're going to have to tell her. You can't just go on a date with the girl and then get cold feet and never ask her out again. She'll think you hated her."

"That's not even possible," Remus sighed, hitting his hand against the post of his bed as he paced. "What are you suggesting, Amy? You want me to do something, I can tell, but I don't know what it is."

I sighed, knowing he wasn't going to like it, but that it was the only way for him to understand sooner rather than later what we'd all been telling him since he decided he liked Sarah.

"If the date is going well," I said slowly, "you need to create a foundation for future dates."

"How?"

"If you think the date is going well," I pressed, "and you have even an inkling that you might want to ask her out again, you flat-out tell her everything. And I mean everything, Remus. Because you can't build a relationship on secrets, and she deserves to know before she starts picking out baby names."

Remus paled and I knew he was thinking about how difficult it would be to tell her, especially since Sarah would probably want kids and no one knew if lycanthropy could be passed on in childbirth.

There hadn't been a lot of study on the matter, obviously.

"Amy," Remus began, his voice something of a whine, "you're asking a lot-"

"I know," I said firmly. "And I'm not asking, Remus, I'm demanding. You can't expect for Sarah to just intuit that you've got something to say. You need to say it."

With a heavy sigh he began gripping the post to his bed tightly, looking down at the floor. Finally, he said, "Okay. Okay, I'll tell her."

"Promise me."

"I promise, if the date is going well-"

"Everything."

"Everything. I promise, Amy." He looked up at me with his amber eyes glowing with some sort of fervor. "But you have to promise me something too. You need to promise you'll go to Hogsmeade with the other Marauders. I know you don't want to talk to Sirius, and even though I think you're being stupid I won't force you to talk to him. But at least be around him. Give yourself a chance to doubt these assumptions you've both made that are making you act like idiots."

It was only fair to agree, so I did so, promising Remus that I would do as he asked, knowing that he would keep his promise to me, painful as it was for him.

Whether Remus's brief time in Divination had suddenly paid off or whether Remus put Sirius up to it, Sirius asked me at dinner that night if I would go with the boys to Hogsmeade.

I tried not to grit my teeth in consternation at Remus and his smug expression as I said I'd go. After all, Peter and James would be there, and I didn't think James would try his pathetic excuse to leave us alone two times, especially not in a row.

"That's good," Lily said happily, "because I've promised Professor McGonagall to help her with some administrative business, and Marlene's got a date."

Well, there went my big plan to get the girls to come with us, which would likely keep James from pulling any stunts. Lily's eye on him made him a much more mature, livable person these days.

"Who with, Marlene?" Remus asked kindly, grinning at my slight pout.

"Oh, there's this guy in Ravenclaw," she said casually. "He's sort of nobody, but he's cute enough, and he asked me very nicely. I didn't see any reason not to give it a shot, especially since none of us had really made plans."

I didn't really care much about her date with the Ravenclaw, but I was already dreaming up questions to avoid having to talk about my own trip to Hogsmeade with the boys.

Strangely, unlike what I had expected from Sirius, who had grown so strange and sullen around me since the last Hogsmeade, he'd brightened considerably when I said I would go, and he seemed to still be almost smiling to himself, glancing up at me every few seconds when he thought I wasn't looking.

Now I was really confused. Had Lily been right all along? Was there still some semblance of hope?

Before I could either talk about Marlene's date or digest how I felt about the fact that Sirius kept looking at me, I was interrupted in my thoughts by the loud and increasingly obnoxious voice of James Potter.

"I was thinking we do the usual," he said happily, "and then maybe explore a bit. You know, take that trail that goes out to the shack and follow it toward the mountains a bit. Not too far, just...just do something new. It's our last year, you know? We've only got so much time to explore Hogsmeade."

"Yes, until we all can Apparate and then we can visit Hogsmeade anytime we want," I said dryly.

"Speak for yourself," Peter squeaked forlornly.

I did feel a bit bad, bringing up Apparition around Peter, who had been by far the worst in our year when we took the classes. The only thing that could be said about his slow progress was that he hadn't been splinched yet, but it had to be difficult when all of his friends had successfully Apparated within the first three lessons, setting records for being the most talented class in generations when it came to magical travel.

"Besides," James sighed, "it wouldn't be the same. We won't be exploring together, braving the wilderness in our last days of student-hood."

"You're ridiculous," I sighed, glancing at Sirius out of the corner of my eye, seeing that he was deliberately watching me. I told myself that it was because I'd just been talking, but my stomach tightened with excitement.

I would need to do a lot of thinking, of course, but there was a lot more hope now than there'd been when he'd put his arm around me.

I'd either be thanking Remus or wishing he'd leave his nose out of my business.

We finished breakfast and went to class, and I was shocked when Sirius sat behind me in Transfiguration, leaning forward most of class so that I could feel his breath on my neck. I mentally cursed myself for putting my hair up that morning, taking a deep breath every time he was particularly close to me.

He also moved his quill close to my back so that every time he reached for it either his finger or the quill tickled my skin, and his mumbled apologies in my ear were threatening to make me shiver in the middle of class.

Either he was just trying to get my attention or he was taking great pains to see what would get me worked up. If he could see inside my head, either way he'd be happy.

And if I thought it couldn't get any worse, we were paired up for Herbology.

Every time he brushed my hand I bit my lip to keep from making some sort of noise that would embarrass me. I could almost feel the heat of his body so close, and I was vaguely aware of him watching me, although probably to make sure a plant didn't eat me.

"Are you excited for Hogsmeade?" he asked, his lips so close to my lips I almost closed my eyes just to feel the moment a bit better.

"I guess," I whispered, my voice hoarse with all of the effort of controlling myself all day long. He was really putting me through the ringer.

"Me too," he said, moving behind me a bit, bracing his hands on either side of me against the table I was working at, his head still over my shoulder, his lips grazing my ear. My heart was racing and I was sure he could hear it, sure that he could smell that I was sweating, sure that he could feel my whole body shaking. If he hadn't known I was in love with him, he would know now. "That's why," he whispered, "I think you should back away from that stinger, Amy, before you're spending it in the hospital wing instead of having a lovely time with us."

The heat flushing my cheeks increased tenfold and I could have kicked myself as I did as he asked, watching as he neutralized the stinger, wondering if he knew what he was doing to me or if he was just being his usual self with gusto now that he was happy again.