Santana has been trying, for the past couple of days, not to overthink too much what had happened- what kept happening- between her and Finn. So she kept having sex with him, so what? It felt good, it was relaxing, and he was very attentive and way more skilled than he used to be. It was the close proximity and the pregnancy hormones, probably. She wasn't complaining, but that didn't mean anything.
So she told him she sort of loved him, so what? She did, didn't she? It really wasn't a big deal...but even so, it didn't seem worth mentioning to Quinn.
Quinn... Santana was starting to miss her. It had been months since she had seen her, the longest she had gone since she had known her, and although she still talked on the phone with her and Skyped, it wasn't the same. She had actually found herself bursting into tears yesterday when she saw a commercial with three college aged girls walking arm in arm, because it reminded her of herself, Quinn, and Brittany.
Since her news of pregnancy had spread far and wide, via Rachel's huge mouth, Brittany had been contacting her in her sporadic manner, and Santana had to say that she was feeling more and more confused towards her. Did the other girl want to continue to be friends, even after everything? Could they be? Did she want to be? She sort of did, but what if she was hurt again?
After some thought she decided to ask Quinn to come stay for the weekend, and then as an after thought invited Brittany too. It didn't seem right, somehow, to totally leave her out of things, if she did want to maintain a relationship. She found herself, the day they were scheduled to arrive, pacing the apartment straightening everything, which was just silly. Both had seen her in entirely messy states before many times over, but somehow she wanted everything just right for them anyway.
Finn wasn't sure what was going on with him and Santana. She didn't seem to be fighting anything and they seem to be getting even closer, but she also wasn't really talkative about feelings besides saying something about loving him. Of course he's falling in love with her as well, but doesn't know the context she was saying or feeling it in. It had him all kinds of confused and trying to search for answers any way he could find them, but through sex and intimate moments with their daughter, he could sort of guess what she was feeling for him?
God this is all so hard and it's sort of hard not to ask and talk to her about it all, but he also doesn't want to bring it up and her shut down and shut him out. It also didn't help at all that her ex was coming this weekend. Like really? Did she not see how intimidated he was by their past and how he knows she is still in love with the other girl? It just always seems whenever they take 5 steps forward, something comes along that brings them 10 steps back.
He was excited for Quinn to come, happy for Santana to have a friend around and him as well. But not Brittany, the last thing he wants is someone coming in and messing up everything for them. It's hard to hide the worry on his face, so he decides to wash the dishes in the sink to try and busy himself from getting too anxious.
Santana is who he wants to be with, his family, the mother of his baby and to have to try and think of someone that is terrible for her coming in and messing that all up makes him sick to his stomach. He has no idea what this weekend will bring, what will change or what will come about, but he knows regardless he needs to talk to her and figure out what she's really thinking and feeling somehow.
Santana passes Finn about five times before she notices him washing dishes. She paces around another few times, straightening already tidy objects, before she comes up behind him and puts her hands on his hips, giving him a light shake before leaning her forehead onto his back.
"Finnnnn...I haven't seen them in a really long time."
She doesn't say it, but her unspoken question is "What if they don't like me anymore? What if things are too different?"
Finn stole a few looks through plates at Santana behind him, wondering what she was doing and finally cracking a smile. Her touch caused him to calm down slightly and he let out a long breath he didn't even know he was holding in.
"But they've always been your friends. I haven't seen mine in a while either, but when we do see each other, it'll probably be just like old times."
He shrugged his shoulders softly, hoping that she would believe him about that. Maybe that's just a guy thing, but he can't imagine Quinn not being the same great friend to her.
Santana scoffs, rolling her eyes, and makes no effort to move away. He definitely doesn't get it.
"Right. I've always been pregnant and living with a guy in New York, and Brittany's always been a genius at MIT. We're sooooo like our old selves. Haven't you seen me doing cartwheels and splits lately?"
Finn turned around in her arms to face her, his hands settling around her as he looked into her eyes.
"But you're still you underneath it all, you still have the memories with them and inside jokes, the stories and stuff. You three were best friends in highschool and no matter what happens in life, you still have that. "
Santana shrugs, lowering her gaze. This was true, but sometimes high school seemed so far away, and she wasn't the same girl she had been. None of them were. Everything had changed, and sometimes it seemed she had lost everything and everyone she ever had known in the process. She rested her head against his chest, going quiet, and when she heard the knock on the door she almost jumped out of her skin.
"They're here!"
Finn hugged her back, wondering what she was thinking and feeling right now. All he kept bringing up was her friendship with the girls, hoping that's what she still saw it as with Brittany. The girl being here was a huge deal to him because he knows how she works and he's a nice guy, but he's not going to stand how she acts with Santana and tries to ruin everything for her. A half smile formed on his face, seeing how happy she was and started to follow her to the door to open it up for them to come in.
Santana hangs behind him, strangely and uncharacteristically shy. As he opens the door, he is greeted with Quinn's bright smile as she looks him up and down, eyebrows raised.
"Something's different...I'd ask you if you worked out, but it would probably inflate your ego too much. Then again, Santana's probably torn it to shreds by now, you could probably use some pumping up."
She laughed, then hugged him briefly but genuinely. Brittany, behind her, is more cool in her reception, giving Finn a nod and pat, but not meeting his eyes. As Quinn releases Finn,seeing Santana standing beside him, her smile grows, and she rolls her eyes at her, one hand on her hip.
"Really, San? I know you're pregnant, and I'm sure you're carrying way worse than I ever was, but don't worry, I'll get the mocking out of the way upfront."
But this is said totally teasingly, and she holds out her arms, giving Santana a fierce hug.
"You look good, San, seriously."
Santana hugs her back hard, one hand entwined in her hair, and blinks back quick tears that come to her eyes, inwardly scoffing at the hormones she's more than sick of by now before she releases her. Looking past Quinn to Brittany, she smiles at her too, a little more awkwardly.
"Hey Britt."
Brittany smiles back at her and comes forward, pulling her into a hug that lasts long enough for Santana to get uncomfortable and almost pull back.
"Hey Sanny...so it's totally true, you ARE always totally sexy. You look like a pretty Buddha, except with hair and smaller feet and ears."
Finn could tell that Santana was super nervous and it was kind of cute, he smiled over his shoulder at her before opening up the door and thankful that Quinn was the first behind it. She had him laughing right away and it was like typical Quinn, but more mature than ever before.
"Hey to you too," Finn teased, leaning in to give her a hug and pulling back just to see Brittany.
He barely greeted her, just nodded his head and stood back next to Santana. His first instinct was to take her hand like usual, but decided not to because he had no idea what she has told them or let on for them to be. Obviously they know they're living together and having a baby, but has Santana down played what they are at all?
It was nice to see Quinn there for her, able to talk about pregnancy and babies and it felt really nice to have her here. Brittany's words, however, had him grinding his teeth and jaw, making him feel uncomfortable and going into protective mode right away. This is why he wished she wasn't coming and wished she wouldn't even touch Santana.
But he knows the connection he and Santana have and how she loves him, so he's going to try and believe in that.
His hand settles on the small of her back as Santana is finally out of the hug and he holds her a bit closer.
"Are you guys hungry or anything?" he asks, mainly looking at Quinn before over their shoulders. "Let me get your bags?"
"They're outside," Brittany says in a flat tone, her eyes wide, but to Santana, anyway, the intention seems clear. She wants him out of the picture, at least for a little while.
Quinn, however, eyes narrowing slightly, speaks up a little louder than she normally might, seeming to get her intent.
"Right, but Britt and I can get them, we want to stretch out our legs...don't we, Britt?"
When Brittany opened her mouth, Quinn took her by the hand and dragged her out into the hall. Santana, more oblivious, frowns with some confusion but lets them go.
Finn scrunched up his eyebrows a bit, looking at Britt and then back at Quinn. It was clear to him why Brittany was here with the tone in her voice and the way she treated him already. He had every right to be cold, but she didn't. This was him and Santana's place, their baby, their life and how rude she is being isn't an act. His eyes couldn't help but thank Quinn as she took the other blonde away and he quickly turned to Santana once the girls were out of sight.
"When um, when was the last time you talked to Brittany?" he asked, licking over his lips and trying to stay as cool as possible.
"Like...yesterday?" Santana responds with a shrug, trying to remember. "She texts me sometimes. You have to be fluent in Brittany-ese to understand it, but I've developed a knack. Why?"
Finn's lips switched side to side, trying to think if he wanted to get into this right now. He sort of hopes Santana see's it on her own, that she's not blind to what Brittany is doing and how she's treating him. There's nothing to understand besides how childish and selfish she is and how she takes advantage of Santana, but he doesn't want to point that out now or how she is acting. If Santana doesn't see it by tonight, he'll say something, but if Quinn can...maybe Santana will on her own. If she loves him, then she has to pick up on it at some point.
"Just wondering," he responded, cupping her face and smiling as he leaned in to kiss her softly.
The girls were off getting their bags and out of sight so this was the best time to kiss her and to be honest, he needed to right now to try and shake this feeling.
A little surprised, but not unwilling, Santana kissed him back, but kept it brief. She goes to the door again and opens it as the girls come through with their bags, and she is not surprised, but also not entirely pleased, to see that Brittany has brought Lord Tubbington in his carrier.
"Britt, really?" she sighs. "I thought I read somewhere something about pregnant girls aren't supposed to be near cats or something..."
"That's kitty pee, Sanny, and don't worry, Lord Tubbington pees in the toilet like a person and only poops chocolate bars, so you're safe," Brittany assures her.
She sets down her suitcase and the cat carrier even as Quinn rolls her eyes behind her at the comments about the cat, muttering out loud, "Hey, don't look at me, I tried."
Reaching for Santana's stomach, Brittany rubs her hands over it, smiling as she lifts Santana's shirt, touching the bare skin.
"Awww it's still just a little stomach. Like you had a really, really big lunch. Sort of like you're a boa constrictor that ate a dog. Not a really huge dog though, just a medium one like a cocker spaniel. It's so cute…and your boobs are bigger too!"
Finn's shoulders fall a little, pulling back as Santana did and he chews on the inside of his cheek. He's not the kind of guy to hold her back from her friends, he really isn't and if it was just Quinn here, he'd probably go out and leave them alone. But Brittany was here to try and get Santana, there was no doubt in his mind about it.
"I'm allergic to cats and don't want to risk it for the baby either," Finn said, speaking up for himself and looking to Quinn as Santana did.
His hands couldn't help but clench into fists as Brittany was walking right over to touch Santana's stomach. Their baby, but it made him even more mad that Santana wouldn't stop her either. He felt so sick right now and it wasn't just because of the cat.
"Yeah, the boobs part is cool...looking like a snake, not so much," Santana responded, a little uneasy from Brittany's attention to her.
Taking a step back, she looks first to Finn, then Quinn, as though for help, exhaling.
"Britt, if LT is here...which you know, you could have asked permission for...he's gotta stay in the guest room the whole time, I'm serious, okay?"
"Sure," Brittany said easily, but Santana knew even as she said this that she was hardly the most watchful of owners.
She sighed, meeting Quinn's eyes, and was relieved when Quinn, who had been looking between the three of them, sharp eyed, stepped forward, giving Santana's hair a playful tug.
"So I hear you've been making Finn make you M&M pizza with cheetos lately...I'm scared to know what's on the menu for the next few days."
Glad for the distraction, Santana turned to her, tugging her hair back in retaliation. "Yeah because you eating frozen waffles with mayonnaise and skittles was better."
Finn honestly can't even believe Brittany, he wants to tell her to leave and stay somewhere else.
"Yeah, the cat hair alone is going to make me really sick and I don't want the cat pee or whatever it is anywhere near Santana if it can be harmful for our baby," he spoke, stepping forward to put his hand back onto Santana's back and hand on the side of her stomach, adding emphasis to his words. "Cheetos and M&M's combined do make for some weird tasting kisses, but yeah she likes it and the baby seems to too. But don't worry, I got a few things at the grocery store to grill up some food whenever you girls are hungry."
Finn didn't even realize he let out about kisses, it just came natural so didn't think twice about it.
"Mayonnaise and skittles? Gross… Can you still eat that stuff or is it ruined for you?" he asked Quinn, wondering if Santana is still going to be a fan of that food once she has the baby
Quinn's eyebrows shoot up to her hairline, her eyes grow wide, and she makes an audible noise in her throat somewhere between a cough and an exclamation, though it remains soft. Her eyes slide with new suspicion down to Finn's hands on Santana, and a slow smile comes over her face, her eyes lighting up and suddenly seeming considerably more interested in what she is seeing. Brittany's face goes blank, and she too is looking at Finn's hands as Quinn speaks.
"Kisses, huh? So is this like, Santana kisses her stomach and then you do and pick up cheeto and M&M remnants, or...'cause it's not that easy to kiss your own stomach, and if you can manage that, San, I'm impressed."
She ignores the question Finn had leveled at her, not even seeming to hear it; she's still looking at Santana with that smug expression Santana is always irritated by. Santana rolls her eyes at her, even as she automatically leans back into Finn's hands.
"Don't be a dork, Quinn. I know it's really outside your comfort zone to try, but you're in New York now, it ain't allowed."
She laces her fingers through Finn's on her stomach, and as Brittany sees this, the blonde seems unable to hold herself back any further. She comes closer to Santana too, all of them no longer standing in the doorway as she takes Santana's other hand and squeezes it in hers.
"It sounds delicious. You can show me, Sanny."
Finn blushes for a second only to quirk an eyebrow. Santana hasn't told her friends much of anything between them which makes him a bit worried and nervous. He didn't even realize that he let out something about kissing, but was kind of glad he did. Maybe now Brittany would get the hint and Quinn could see how crazy he was about Santana.
"That would be kind of weird, Quinn. I mean..yeah, I don't even think I'd consider that a kiss or get a real taste of it that way."
A dopey grin formed on his lips as he chuckled a bit, his hand squeezing Santana's back as he held her against him and was practically beaming. That is until Brittany came closer and tried to get near them.
"Wait, what?" He let out towards Brittany, unable to hold back now. She just keeps jumping over the line and he can't handle it. "You're not kissing her, Britt. And stop touching her and our baby," he let out, not trying to rip Santana away, but wrapped his other arm around her stomach so she could see they're together.
"Ohhhh? So what exactly is a "REAL taste", how does that come about, exactly?"
Quinn is definitely grinning now, her eyes glinting with equal parts mischief and genuine enjoyment of the conclusions she's rapidly coming to. Her eyes again travel down Santana's and Finn's linked hands, and she takes a step forward, seeming to be deciding whether to comment.
But as Brittany steps forward, taking Santana's hand, and Finn snaps at her, her smile slips, and she looks at Santana for her reaction. Santana, for her part, is conflicted. She wants so badly for things to go well, for things to go how they used to be, how they SHOULD be. Her and Quinn and Brittany all best friends, all having fun with no worries and no tension between them...but if she's honest, when had that ever really been true? Their relationships had been based on lies and faking and pretense as much as they had ever been on love and friendship, and although the balance had shifted as they matured, it seemed to her as she watched the exchange between Finn and Brittany now that maybe it would never shift back to fully positive, ever.
She doesn't want to push Brittany away, and she doesn't want to be rude to her. But she also doesn't want Finn to be upset with her...and a part of her still wants to pull away from Brittany out of self preservation and fear, just as much as the other part of her wants to keep letting her touch her and draw her close. Conflicted, she bites her inner cheeks, slowly pulling her hand from her grasp.
"Britt...why don't you put LT in your room, please?"
Brittany doesn't move. Her blue eyes boring into Santana's, she responds to Finn, "You can't tell her what to do, Finn. You might have gave her a baby, for real this time, but that doesn't make her yours. She wants me to touch her, don't you, Sanny?"
Santana doesn't answer right away. How is she supposed to answer that, when the answer is both yes and no? Her hand tightens in Finn's as her eyes shift to Quinn, as though a plea for help.
Finn's smile and awesome feeling was completely shattered by Brittany. Finn would defend Santana over everyone, and he had, even before he had fallen in love with her. It just makes him realize how much further he is in his feelings with her than she is.
If she was to invite Rachel over, that would never be okay and he wouldn't, he would never want Santana to feel like this in the slightest. Why can't she just tell the girl off? Everything about her here is toxic, from the cat that is going to make him sick, to the way she is acting that makes him want to kick over every chair around here. Is he dumb for thinking Santana could ever be fully over her and put him first? He has told her before it's a fear of his, but here she is in their apartment, trying to touch their child and the girl he's been sharing a bed with, falling in love with and kissing every single day.
"I'm not telling her what to do, I'm telling you what to do. You don't get to just show up in our house, touch our baby and try and touch her. You have no idea what we are, what we've been doing, feeling, or anything. But I'm not going to just stand here and watch you keep trying to step over the line with her or think she belongs to you because she doesn't."
He shook his head with his jaw clenched once again, wanting to say so much more but holding back for Santana.
"Okayyyy I'm stepping in," Quinn speaks up at this point, before things can get explosive. Stepping in between Brittany and Finn, she holds both hands out, as though to grab for both or either if necessary. "Brittany. I'm gonna go out on a limb here and say everyone would be much more comfortable right now if you would go put the cat in the guest room...PLEASE. Finn. Calm down. No one bitch slapped anyone and no one's gonna, and no one here belongs to anyone, we're all mature adults, or we're supposed to be. So dial down the macho act because seriously...it won't score you points."
She looks at him meaningfully as she says this, her eyes trying to send the message to him that he was only going to further escalate things, that Santana would likely not take it well. She is still looking at him as she speaks to Santana.
"So San, Britt and I share the guest room tonight, right? How about while Britt is getting him settled, Finn can start to make dinner, and you can show me the baby's room?"
Santana, her eyes shifting between everyone in discomfort, finally looks back to Quinn and nods, letting the blonde step forward and take hold of her arm to gently tug her away.
"Uh...okay..."
She doesn't know what to think about any of this. Finn is so pissed off, and Brittany is obviously trying hard to get her way...but what made her way suddenly Santana again, after all this time? Wasn't she with Sam, or had been recently? Santana was so confused.