There were apple blossoms. Or what Ro would call apple blossoms. Really, who though she really knew what apple blossoms looked like, because she never lived anywhere near apple orchards. But the flowers were small and white and pretty, and a nice breeze wafted their scent through the air.
She was in a park, on a bench under one of the blooming trees, and there was a heavy weight in her arms. Looking down, Ro could only stare in shock – she'd been doing that a lot lately – at the small figure in her arms.
A small infant. If the tuft of jet-black hair – it poked straight up and curled, like one of the old Dr. Suess Who characters – the entire face was just an earlier version of Zee's. He was sleeping, curled against her warmth and secure in her grip, his small fist nearly being sucked by a mouth made of puckered lips.
Her heart melted. (Whose wouldn't?) She found herself cooing and gently rocking the little guy.
Part of Ro wondered why she was holding the newborn Zee. Was she like a nanny or something? Looking around, she didn't see any other adults or possible parents. Of course, that really didn't mean anything. There was a buggy. She probably just took him for a walk in the park.
… For a moment, Ro pondered another possibility, but very quickly tossed it aside.
That wasn't important though. Ro doubted she'd be around long enough for it to become a concern. So she sat back and rocked the small Zee.
"I wonder if you're going to be super-smart too?" she said. "Well, perhaps smart isn't the right word."
It was nice, in this park, calm and relaxing. That was probably the apple blossoms and their aromatherapy. In it, Ro could think.
The only Zee that had been helpful was the Bucky-like one, admittedly because that was the only one she had broken down to. But the others, they probably couldn't have helped her anyway. The little kids, they all seemed to look to her, and any of the older ones would have probably just thought she was crazy or delirious – because she was pretty sure she was sick in one of those worlds and had been shot in another.
So her only help came from Bucky-Zee, and a fat lot of good he was. He didn't even think it was possible, that she was merely crazy. (Maybe she was.) He thought she pushed a button or fell down a rabbit hole or got shot with a las—
But she had been shot by a laser, hadn't she? Those Jokerz. But that was just some stupid weapon. She should be dead.
… Maybe she was dying. Maybe they were wrong, that you didn't see your life before you died, but something else?
No, Rowan, you're being crazy.
But it did make sense, didn't it? Even a little?
She had been shot. Possibly fatally. Maybe she was dying. Maybe, maybe she was already dead.
But then why was all of this happening?
Her pondering was interrupted when the little infant Zee jerked and kicked his feet, and she quickly looked down just in time to see him yawn. She smiled softly and rubbed his little pudgy chin, and his eyes blearily opened and looked up at her. And he grabbed her finger and held it with all his baby strength, which was surprisingly a lot.
Ro smiled and wondered who was taking care of Zee in this world.
And then it came to her. Maybe she was. Yes, that was it. She was taking care of Zee in all of the worlds. (How, exactly, was up for debate.) Maybe it was egotistical, but suddenly Ro felt she understood what this was all about – she was his Guardian Angel, or something like that.
She was like that ancient show, where the main character leapt into other person's life and made sure it would all go for the best. It was just that she didn't have a hologram and a super-computer to help her. She had to figure it out herself.
Yes, it made sense – if she didn't think too hard. She was probably dead, but because she was dead, she could float around and make sure everything was okay before she really went away, forever. Obviously, her Zee didn't need help, but the rest did. Or a few of them, because some of the worlds seemed okay without her help. She probably just had to visit them because no one really figured out the way to the afterlife.
So that's what she'd do, Ro decided. She'd make sure everything was right and proper, or at least connected.
And then she could rest. Part of Ro was amused that she was okay that she was dead.
"Of course, not like you can do anything about it now, can you, Rowan? Can I, Zee?" she asked the gurgling baby. "Nope. So I just got to make sure the rest of you guys don't get your heads blown off."
He jerked her finger, as if in agreement.
"Let's go for a walk." Carefully, perhaps fumbling, Ro stood up and put Zee into the stroller, covered him up. And then she walked down the trail, humming a tune and feeling worlds lighter.