AN: I don't own any of the CSI:NY Characters or any of the show's storylines that I may refer to from time to time, but the rest of the plot is mine.
21. Breakfast to An illustrious future
He wasn't sure if the noises he heard were real or if he was dreaming. They were low almost like a hum in the background. The door clicked, then he opened his eyes only to find the autumn sun streaming through the window right into his face and he closed them again. He wasn't sure if the groan he heard was real or in his head. He finally thought it was in his head as he waited a few moments before trying to open his eyes again. He began to feel the tightness in his joints & muscles, so he slowly sat up and groaned, for real this time, trying to stretch his muscles and make them do what he wanted.
He was a little surprised to hear her voice, her English accent showing through as she spoke. He slowly opened his eyes again and found himself looking at her bare feet. He rubbed the back of his neck, still trying to ease out the kinks from sleeping on the couch, as he slowly raised his head and looked up at her. He hadn't expected her to be standing there looking like that. He grinned at her and muttered something about her outfit as he admired her body in the present he had given her the night before. The short silk nightdress and robe were a great colour on her, but he could see from the look on her face she was nervous, her words uncertain. He wished she was more confident. He told her she looked good, but she didn't seem convinced.
He had seen that look on her a number of times the night before and wondered why it had taken until now to recognize the signs, why the conversation at Stella's six months ago had seemed to hit him out of left field. He needed to reassure her, to give her confidence in their relationship, that this time was real and they were playing for keeps. He fought his way off the couch, still loosening his muscles and stood up before he reached out to her. He caught the fleeting look of anxiety in her eyes as he slid his hands down her arms and onto her hips, drawing her closer, his fingers brushing across the material more than was strictly necessary. With great restraint he avoided her lips and put his mouth to her ear. He murmured encouraging words before teasing her neck with kisses. The vice like grip she had of his arms told him she was trying to stay composed at the onslaught of sensations, OK maybe now was time to push things a little more. As easily as he started, he stopped, teasing her about breakfast in bed.
She didn't bite. He could tell she was tired. Working all night could do that to you. He hadn't moved, and all he wanted to do was keep his hands on her. He trailed his fingers down her neck and over her skin along the lapel of the gown, stopping when she shivered. She took a deep breath and slowly let it out. He could feel her trembling. He wanted her to feel comfortable, but something was off, she was on edge, he just hoped that the way he had behaved, forcing her to react, the night before wasn't affecting how she felt and she was just tired. She moved away, out to the balcony where breakfast had been set up, leaving him feeling like a part of him was missing.
----
He lay staring at the ceiling, as she lay sleeping with her head on his chest and his arm around her. His mind wandered over what had happened since breakfast. What had started out as playful banter over the TV remote had ended up with him pushing her boundaries and them spending the last hour making out. She had finally confessed her fears, that she wouldn't be what he wanted, that she was too inexperienced. She'd also opened his eyes about the high school jock that she spent a lot of time with in their senior year. He had known the guy had a thing for her, but he never realised that it was all talk, that she had been coaching him with his English homework. The guy was an ass, putting out that they were an item. Now he realised why she was never out with him away from school. They may have been best friends but he was beginning to figure that he didn't really know her that well back then. But if this was going to be how he figured things out then maybe it wasn't so bad. It had been quite a while since he had been with someone with her innocence and nervousness, but it was something that only made him want her even more. It was a refreshing change from the women he normally dated, she may appear naïve, but he was certain that with the right encouragement she would gain confidence in the bedroom and they could have a lot of fun along the way.
Her confession that he had been the first boy to kiss her explained why that first kiss at Niagara all those years ago was so awkward, he had surprised her. There had been a subtle shift in their relationship, but they had stayed close, confiding in each other, but they never discussed who they were seeing, until he introduced her to Jason. He was their common link, sometimes he wondered what would have happened if he hadn't introduced them, if they would be here now.
He stroked his fingers up and down her arm as she slept peacefully curled against him. He planted a kiss on the top of her head, no intention of waking her or disturbing her, content just to lay with her and think about their life.
----
He must have dozed off because when he opened his eyes he was laying on his side facing her as she slept, still curled alongside him. He propped himself up on his elbow and reached over to trace his fingers down the side of her face, pushing a strand of hair over her shoulder. The clock on the table behind her showed they still had some time; he didn't want to rush, she could get called out at any moment but while her phone remained silent they could relax.
He thought back to the night before, he needed to talk to her about what happened. He never forced himself on a woman until that moment, the thought still made him feel sick. He was still surprised she had stayed, even more surprised she had returned for breakfast, after all she had been away from him, had time to think. He knew she felt as bad as he did over domestic abuse and rape cases, she had always vowed that she would walk away from any relationship where violence and force were used. He didn't want her walking away, but he was scared that if things got tough and they fought again he might really hurt her next time. He'd heard the stories about how other cops had gone home and beat up their wives or girlfriends, stressing over their jobs. Was this the beginning of the same for him? He didn't want that and right now laying watching her sleep he couldn't imagine anything bad, but the fear remained.
He watched as her eyes opened and her lips smiled at him, a slight flush colouring her cheeks as she realised he had been watching her. He brushed his fingers across her bangs and settled his hand in her hair at the back of her neck easing her towards him before kissing her tenderly. He really wanted her to know how sorry he was for the night before, that he loved her and wanted her. He felt her move closer and her arm wrap around his neck holding him close. Releasing her lips he traced his down her neck to the spot beneath her ear as his hands caressed her body. He was disappointed when she stopped him and lifted his head to look at her.
She could tell something bugged him. He didn't want to confess his fears, he just wanted to show her how gentle he could be. She cupped his face, keeping his eyes on hers. He could see the confusion and concern. His eyes watered. He didn't deserve this, she should have walked away, stopped things before they could get worse. She had brushed away the tears which began to fall. He pushed himself away and lay on his back with arm over his eyes. Silence hung between them. He felt the bed move, he couldn't blame her. It was what he deserved, her to finally walk away. He didn't look as he felt the covers move and he felt her body slide against his. A hand pried his arm from his eyes and he looked into hers, she had propped herself against him.
"I'm not running this time. .... I know last night wasn't you, I pushed you to it, we're both at fault. ... You're not those other cops Don, I know I can trust you. The thought that you could hurt me is scaring you, and it should, but not because of last night. I'm never going to hold last night over you. If it hadn't happened I may well have walked out and run. You stopped me. You showed me that we still have a chance."
He watched her for a moment. "Forgive me?"
"There's nothing to forgive. .... Now what do you say to teaching me another lesson?" She grinned at him.
He stared at her, that pink tinge gracing her cheeks again, an anxious smile on her lips and a spark in her eyes. He liked that look on her. He hoped he would get to see it a lot more. He half nodded as he grinned back, raising his hand slowly to caress her face, drawing her closer until their lips met again.
----
The rest of the day had been spent making out and talking, until duty called and they found themselves on opposite sides of the city. He had an injured jogger on his way to hospital with a nasty head injury and an uncertain future. So for now he was looking at an attempted murder. That's how the call had come in and he found himself waiting for Danny in Central Park. He had hoped Hawkes would be assigned, at least that way there would be less questions, but it was not his lucky day. He knew Danny would press his buttons about Devon, a subject he no longer wanted to discuss. She was history. He was just glad that he never slept with her. She had been convenient when he was pissed off at Nikki, but she wasn't really his type, none of the women he had dated were his type. There was only one who fit that category and finally she was accepting that fact, but it wasn't something they were ready to share yet. She needed sometime to settle into their relationship again, he wanted her to do that without any pressure, without everyone asking her questions. For now he would take the heat and let the team think whatever they wanted, as long as it left her out of the picture.
Finally Danny arrived. He greeted him with a bright remark. Trust Danny to pick up the better mood he was in and immediately think it had something to do with getting into some woman's pants. OK so it did, but it was so much more than that.
He wasn't going to share how good today had started. Yeah, Devon had to feature. Just let Messer think that, what about work? He tried to bring them back to the subject at hand. Danny bought it for a moment before turning to him again. He knew that his friend would find a way to talk about Nikki. It had been a bit of a surprise to find her back working in New York during that damned spy case.
He remained non committal about where his life was heading, letting Danny assume that Devon was still around and he had yet to make peace with Nikki. Knowing that there was little chance of Danny not pursuing things like an old woman he made the decision to go to the hospital to try and question their victim.
He only hoped that she was being left alone to do her job.
----
It wasn't to be his day. A few hours later he was with Danny at another case, this time at the docks. They were waiting for another CSI that Mac was sending out to join them. Conversation started over another case where Mac and Stella had to scrape a guy from between two containers. Then SHE appeared. He raised his eyes at her briefly over Danny's head and received a nervous smile in response. He took in her overalls and other protective gear as she stopped in front of them. She kept her eyes away from him and stayed focused on the job.
There was no chance to speak directly, he just gave her a grimace as she prepared to enter the container to assess their DBs. He thought he caught a flash of pink as she raised her mask over her face.
He smiled to himself at the thought that he was causing that reaction in her after knowing her for so long. It was surprising that she was reacting like she was back in high school under the scrutiny of the football team. Nervous and embarrassed with the attention he had been the one she grumbled to as they walked home from school. Now he was the one causing that reaction. He kind of liked it on her, knowing that it was a whole lot more going on underneath. That now she had realised how hard she had fallen for him. He was just waiting for her to openly admit it. He just needed to hear those three words to make everything worthwhile. To know that this time there was no going back. This time was different.
He didn't see much of her or Danny after that. They spent hours processing the container while he interviewed the dock workers and gathered the CCTV footage for analysis.
----
He had dropped the CCTV stuff with Adam and was on his way back to his desk when he saw her. It was about 3 am and she was making coffee in the break room. She was pulling another all night case and it was probably the last chance he would get to see her for a while so he slipped into the room and stopped as near to her as he dared in full view of the lab. He knew he had startled her, but with a slight amused grin he reached over her head and taken another mug from the cupboard and set it next to the others she already had out. The scent of lemons reached him and he noticed her still damp hair. Lemon suited her, but she only smelt like that when she had been processing a really bad scene. Hold on, when had he started to notice that? He saw her hand shake as she reached for the coffee pot. He stopped her and poured three coffees. Then she spoke. He was making her nervous, he knew it, he also knew that she was very aware of their exposed position, of the talk that would ensue if they were seen, but he didn't care at this point. He just wanted to wrap his arms around her and feel her lips on his. He believed she wanted it too, but she wasn't going to give in. She dodged away from him and sat at one of the tables.
He taunted her with talks of a secret assignation in a supply closet - just as Danny breezed in. He hoped that he hadn't heard what had just gone down. It appeared not as Danny asked about his presence in the lab, she took the opportunity to escape and go back to work. He couldn't blame her. Danny took the seat she had just left and looked determined to get answers.
It was going to be tough keeping a secret from the team. After all they were good at getting to the truth. Danny seemed curious about whether he was planning to hook up with Nikki again. He fobbed him off with mention of Devon before giving him the details on the victim from the park and quickly making his escape, leaving his friend with the impression that Devon was still the girl in his life. He hoped it would take the heat off for a little while.
----
He'd spent the rest of the night at his desk filling out paperwork on all his recent cases. He had a sense of fulfilment that for once in a very long time he had a clear desk. Probably quite a good thing now that the results were out for the sergeant's exam. He looked around and ran his hand across his face. Things were going to change now, he would be leaving this run down hell hole, probably be facing a uniform job somewhere out in one of the boroughs. It wasn't what he really wanted, but that was the price of progression, if he had any hopes of following his father's example he had to do it. He was expected to do it. Now the results had sunk in he began to realise that things were going to be different. A lot different.
He looked up, he had been summoned to the corner office. He hoped it wouldn't take long, his time was up and he was ready to go home. Well go somewhere, he wasn't sure how long before she would finish and where they would go. He wandered through the half empty squad room to his supervisors office. He was a little surprised when he was asked to take a seat. His supervisor was a decent sort, he'd done his share of exams and shitty jobs, now here he was a Lieutenant of Homicide spending most of his time chained to a desk with personnel issues. You had to feel a little sorry for him. He didn't get to do much real police work anymore. That's one thing he hoped would change in future. That he could still keep in touch with what happened out on the streets, that he wouldn't lose that to save political face as so many of the brass seemed to do.
He felt like the air had been sucked out of him as he left the office the piece of paper handed over by his lieutenant clutched in his hand. He wasn't destined for some crappy backwater, she had been right, he was wanted by some of the top units in the city and they had given him the choice and 24 hours to make it. As he walked through the door he saw her across the room holding a conversation with Angell, he wanted to go to her, show her the letter and ask her opinion, but to do that would announce to some of the worst gossip mongers in the building what they were carefully trying to protect. Now he had two secrets. He sat down heavily in his chair and slid the paper into his jacket pocket and tried to turn his attention to the few scattered files which were left on his desk.
He knew she was watching, he wondered what she would do when she had finished her conversation. It wasn't really a surprise that she had slipped away without him noticing. Angell was leaning against her desk watching him as he looked up. He sighed when she walked over. Although maybe she had answers. Her dad was in town, an ex NYPD officer himself. He needed to talk to someone with experience and he knew what his old man would say, but he needed objective views. Angell was a little sceptical at his request, but she agreed to setting up a meeting.
---
After leaving detective sergeant Angell he headed home, making another call along the way. Both conversations served him well and he had one more person to discuss things with, but he thought he had made his decision. He wasn't sure if his father would agree with his choice, but it was his career and it didn't matter how big a legend his father was, Don Flack jnr was his own person and would make his own decisions after careful consideration of his options.
Arriving at her house, he let himself in with the keys he still held. He noted the silence and assumed she had already gone to bed, so he discarded his jacket over the back of the chair and headed for the kitchen. He poured a glass of water and drank half of it before discarding the rest. Returning to the lounge he was about to reach for the remote to watch TV a bit when he noticed her, asleep on the couch. He changed his mind about the TV and went to the side of the couch and went to pick her up to take her upstairs, but having eased the blanket off her he stopped. She was wearing the nightdress and gown he had given her two nights before. His eyes strayed over her and grinned. Taking a breath he slipped his arms under her and lifted her up. She stirred. With quiet words in her ear he hoped she would go back to sleep, but as he carried her to bed she slowly woke up. She knew something was on his mind and she asked him about it.
He needed a little more time, to think things through again for himself, he guessed what she would say, and deep down he knew she would probably be right. After all she had told him that he was too valuable to send to some uniform job out of the way. The offers made that morning had seemed to bear that out. Only one of the three jobs on the table involved uniform, but not in some quiet backwater precinct. He watched as she got off the bed where he had just deposited her and walked towards him. The conversation could wait. Now all he wanted was to feel her in his arms and his lips on her skin. He'd missed holding a decent conversation with her last night while they worked, but most of all he missed the closeness they'd developed since she arrived at the hotel a couple of days before. He ran his hands over her gown, making sure she felt every movement, before capturing her lips, she wrapped her arms around his neck for a moment until he slowly let her go. She trailed her hands down his chest before finally moving her fingers to his tie, gently sliding the knot in shaking hands as she watched the look on his face. He wasn't sure if the question was for real or a ploy to make him react, but he did react. Stopping her from walking away by stepping in front of her and catching her arm. He established they had some time before she needed to collect Amy and he was due back on duty. He definitely had a few ideas about how to spend their day, starting with relieving the ache he'd had all night with having to keep his hands off her. He ran his hand over her hip onto her back and drew her closer, his other hand pushed into her hair, cradling her head as he lowered his lips to meet hers. After a moment he pulled back and noted her flushed cheeks. He mumbled something about her wearing to many clothes as he leaned in to kiss her again while his hands moved to divest her of the robe, just as he had done before. She sighed as his lips met hers in a rather more passionate duel.
----
He watched her as he walked around the car outside the house in Queens. He reached for her hand as they went down the path to collect their daughter. It was their first show of affection in public for months, it felt good to have her hand in his. She didn't pull back when her friend opened the door and greeted them, although she did let go as they stepped inside the house and waited the moment or two for the two little girls to appear. He watched his daughter throw herself at her mother and get picked up and hugged. He smiled at the child and saw her face light up when Nikki turned her around. He couldn't refuse her outstretched arms and he easily took her from her mother. Sarah was a gracious hostess, offering tea, but they declined to head back to the city. Their journey full of the joys of Amy talking about her weekend sleepover and incessant questions about when she would see him again and if he would take her to Macdonald's.
His girls dropped him at the precinct shortly before his shift. It was going to be a long two days. He was working nights and she was back on days. They might see each other around shift change, but that would be it until his day off on Tuesday when they planned for him to finally move into the house. They were keeping it a surprise for Amy but he was already quite excited about having that family life he had dreamed about since she first came back to the city. Having to walk away from her was one of the hardest things he ever did, but he took the risk they wouldn't be seen as he kissed her goodbye.
----
He felt really good as he sat down at his desk, but his peace was soon shattered when Angell mentioned his sister had called. It had been months since the last time, she had been in LA then asking him to send her money to get out of some jam or other. Of course he obliged. She was his sister after all and the rest of the family had pretty much cut her off. His father didn't want anything to do with her hell raising activities and their brother was too caught up in his own life to worry what the baby of the family was doing. Don had been close to her when they were teenagers, even Nikki had become friends with her. But since he had left home the wild nights sneaking out of the house had only got worse when Sam was the last of the Flack children to live at home. He would call her, but not now, he had other priorities, his ringing phone summoning him to a new crime scene.
---
He was sitting at his desk the following morning for the weekly Captain's briefing and noted that she walked in with Mac and they talked briefly to one of the other guys before stepping back as the Captain appeared to give his usual weekly messages and reminders. The guys were getting restless as the Captain stated he had one final announcement looking straight at him. This was the attention he didn't want. He knew her eyes were on him too now. Interest had been caught and everyone fell silent. No one in the room had known he was even taking the exam, so it came as a surprise when it was announced that he was going to take on new responsibilities. He didn't like being centre of attention and certainly not when others were gloating over his achievements. He felt the heat rise in his cheeks. After the Captain left all he wanted to do was disappear and spend a couple of minutes with the blonde goddess across the room. Damn, he hadn't thought of her like that all weekend, so why now again? He absently accepted the congratulations and handshakes from those who passed his desk. He knew she was deliberately holding back, but was pleasantly surprised when she finally headed in his direction. Trust her to ask the practical questions. Yeah, now he would definitely need to tell his father and his other best friend about his illustrious future as a detective sergeant; if they heard it from gossip they would surely rip him a new one for not 'fessing up.
The noise of the swing doors behind him being thrown open had him on his feet in seconds, his gun in his hand as he stepped between her and the door as the naked guy practically collapsed at his feet. Mac approached and caught the guys final words as the squad room became a crime scene. He caught the case and now faced a double shift. The good news? She got to go with him to find another dead guy. One who their first victim claimed to have killed, in the future. That was just weird.
The muse has partially returned so I hope to have another chapter up soon.