Shout outs to my beta, who's birthday was Friday! Sorry the wait was a little longer for this chapter. I got a plot bunny in my head for a new story, started kicking it around with my beta and we got totally distracted. Anyhoo…
Thanks for the reviews! They keep me going!
EPOV
"Uh-oh," Alice says as we pull up to Bella's house before school.
"What?" I ask immediately as my cell phone rings and it's Jasper. He was watching Bella's house while I went home and got Alice.
"Listen, it's real important you don't blow a gasket on Bella right now," he says in greeting. As if I ever would…
"What's going on?" I demand of my brother and sister in a threatening voice, not that either one of them probably feels threatened by it.
"Bella tried to get out of it; she really did," Jasper says again. "And it's probably okay, given the recent events."
If they're trying not to make me anxious right now, it isn't working.
The front door opens and Bella emerges. I smile when I see her. She actually looks ready this morning, if not experiencing some sort of dread. I'm out of the car and opening the passenger side door for her before she's even down the front steps. She smiles nervously as she reaches me. I can't hear Jasper's thoughts through the phone and Alice isn't revealing much. Charlie's cruiser is gone. He usually leaves in between the time I leave and get back.
I pull her into a hug, trying to give her whatever reassurance I can to help her summon the courage to tell me whatever it is she has to. I kiss her on the forehead and stroke her cheek with my thumb. "Just spit it out, whatever it is," I say.
"You might want to get in the car first, just in case you have an unpleasant reaction," she mutters.
"I highly doubt it," I chuckle.
"You've said yourself sometimes you have trouble controlling your temper."
"Not with you, love; never with you."
"Just…get in the car anyway," she pleads. I sigh and roll my eyes, waiting until she's buckled in to close the passenger door, but I hear her talking to Alice anyway. "Did you tell him?"
"No."
"Did Jasper?"
"No."
"Nobody's softened the blow?" she looks incredulous when I slide behind the wheel again.
"I'm in the car," I needlessly announce.
"Charlie's making me go to a Christmas party Friday night at the Blacks' house. I tried to get out of it, I really did. He said Billy's been asking for me and we haven't seen them in a while and if I want to go to Aspen over Christmas I have to do this."
Okay, I'm not happy about that.
"I tried to come up with different excuses, Edward, I really did, but Charlie wouldn't hear any of them. He went on and on about how he missed Thanksgiving with me and he's going to miss Christmas and I haven't been here for Christmas in over a decade and he's been so excited to do something like this with me. I didn't know what to say!"
"He's your father, Bella; there's nothing to say but yes," I force out turning to face forward. He guilted her. There's no way any of that would not have gotten her hook, line, and sinker.
"Well, that had to be painful," Alice mutters in the back seat. I shoot her a glare.
"You're okay with it?" she asks cautiously.
"Not even a little bit."
Alice laughs in the back seat. I don't know how she can find this amusing. None of us can go to La Push. I will have absolutely no way of knowing if she's okay until she reemerges from the forbidden territory across the treaty line. Alice can't even see it.
I drive through town faster than I normally do when she's in the car. Despite the fact that I'm in a new car, it's still easily recognizable by everyone in town. I hardly think anyone is going to give the Chief of Police's daughter's boyfriend too much trouble. Plus, Carlisle is highly respected.
"You might want to control your speed pulling into the school parking lot," Alice warns. "Humans aren't known to have quick reflexes…as you know."
I give her a less than amused smirk in the rear view mirror and let my foot off the gas. Bella is still eyeing me curiously. I don't like that she was nervous about telling me anything, but on the other hand, it's hard to control my reaction to something like that.
I suppose one could argue that he deserves some kind of gratitude from Bella and myself for his assistance on Thanksgiving. However, I am relatively certain that Jacob would use that situation to further his argument against us.
I slam to a stop in my usual spot in the parking lot. Tyler and Eric jump back. When I get out of the car, I slam my door shut and Bella's already opening hers and stepping out of the car. I hate having to move at a human pace.
"Is that the Guardian?" Tyler whispers to Eric.
"The what?" Eric replies confused.
"The Guardian. It's what diplomats use in the Middle East. You can shoot a rocket at it and it'll barely scratch the paint."
"It can't be. What would Cullen need that for here?" Eric replies. Bella arches an eyebrow at me. Damn Tyler Crowley!
Alice dances along next to us as I head into the school and Bella is silent next to me. This is probably not the best of places for me right now. Not that I fear for anyone's safety right now, but sometimes you just want to be pissed off and not have to talk to anybody.
Alice peels away from us for her first class and Bella stops at her locker. "I wish you'd talk to me," she whispers. "I hate when you're mad at me."
"You think I'm mad at you?" I ask incredulously. How can she think I'm ever mad at her? If it wasn't for me, she never would have been exposed to werewolves.
"I tried, Edward, I did," she says earnestly. "I guess if it wasn't for Italy, I could have come up with a better excuse, but I'm just so afraid that I'll never see Charlie again that I want to spend as much time with him as I can. I really don't think I'll be in any danger in La Push…"
"It's not that I fear for your safety, Bella. I think its plain you'd be safe enough from harm in Jacob's presence."
"Then what exactly is it?" she shakes her head in confusion.
I'm embarrassed to admit it, but I also don't want her to think I mad at her. "It's…well, he has a crush on you; he thinks he's in love with you."
"So?" she counters.
I look over her shoulder and focus on the chips in the paint of her locker. I shrug and push her hair gently off her shoulder, exposing her graceful, pale neck.
"You're jealous?" her eyes pop out of her head and her jaw drops open.
I don't think it's so surprising. She's a very beautiful girl. Most of the boys in school want to date her…among other things I really wish I'd never seen in their fantasies. Jacob is human, mostly, and can give her things I can't. And on top of that, he can also protect her. She can still have all her human experiences. I know that she loves me. But what if Jacob is able to really impress upon her all the things she'd be giving up by staying with me? Then what do I do? I could let her go, probably, but I could never leave her, which means I'd sentence myself to a lifetime of absolute misery followed by a self-inflicted death when she finally died herself.
"Edward!" she laughs, a bright, brilliant, melodic laugh that makes me look at her with adoring puppy dog eyes despite the fact that she's laughing at me. She slides her hand up to my neck, leans up and presses her warm lips to mine. The singeing heat shoots through my mouth and down my throat. When she pulls away, she smiles at me. Bella's smile can light me on fire.
"Jacob is sweet, but he's like a cousin to me. His feelings, whatever they are, are misplaced. There is no one else for me, but you. I could never love anyone else the way I love you. Ever."
"But the things you'd miss with me, you wouldn't miss with him."
"And I've told you before, if I couldn't have them with you then I didn't want them at all. You never have anything to be jealous of." I frown as she stresses the word 'you.' As opposed to what? Her having to be jealous? I think having been by myself for a century until she came along proves there's no one else out there for me. Maybe once she's changed, she will finally see herself clearly.
BPOV
"This is great, Bells!" Charlie says putting his arm around my shoulders as we walk up to the Blacks' front door. "It's nice doing things like this as a family." I don't know if he's intending to make me feel guilty, but he is. "It's nice to be able to show off my kid for a change."
"Yeah." I smile for his benefit. I'm very nervous. I haven't had the same cheerful encounters with the La Push residents that Charlie has. I saw Sam and the other wolves through the living room window, all present and accounted for. My plan is to just stick by Charlie. He is, after all, armed.
Edward was not the easiest to reassure earlier in my bedroom as I was preparing to leave. He looked almost anguished. I know he followed Charlie's cruiser to the treaty line, which I'm willing to bet he's sitting at right now. But he is not completely blind tonight. In my pocket is a shiny new cell phone loaded with all the Cullens' numbers and wonderful features…such as GPS capability and my favorite, the child locator feature. As long as it's on, he knows where I am. It's actually comforting.
Jacob crushes me in a welcoming hug as I cross the threshold; Charlie's fatherly enough to pull me away under the guise of removing my coat.
"I'm glad you came!" Jacob smiles. "Do you want to come hang out with us?" He gestures to where the rest of the pack is hovering in the living room with their various girlfriends or dates. So many of them in one small space, looking as huge as they are, and throwing off the heat that they are is making the living room a little stifling.
I look up at Charlie, who's eyeing the crowd up with some trepidation. "Thanks, Jacob," I decline politely. "But I think I'm just going to head into the kitchen with my dad and get something to drink. It's a little warm in here."
"Oh, well, I'll come with you then," he replies. Charlie tosses me a look as I loop my arm through his. Stick to Charlie's side like glue, that's the plan. Jacob or the other wolves can't say anything if Charlie's around.
Charlie leads me into the kitchen and Jacob chatters aimlessly at my side. This plan works flawlessly until Charlie needs to use the bathroom and I realize that this was what Jacob was waiting for.
"You're avoiding me," Jacob accuses as soon as Charlie is out of earshot.
"I'm not avoiding you, Jacob," I reply.
"What do you think is going to happen to you? Here? Will all of us around?" he counters.
"It's not that anyone thinks I'll be harmed here," I say and scan the room to see if Charlie has reemerged.
"What do they think then?" he asks and I shrug. He draws his own conclusion. "They think I'm going to do something to you?"
"Well, Jacob, it's not like you haven't tried to make your point before," I counter.
"Charlie made his opinion on that quite clear," Jacob mutters.
"What about my opinion?" I ask icily.
"I'm still not sure it's not clouded."
"You're still not sure I can think for myself?" I reply. "Nice, Jacob. Way to sweep a girl off her feet." I spin away intending on just waiting in the hallway for Charlie if I have to, but I see him being drawn into a conversation with Sue Clearwater.
"Wait, Bella," he says quickly, grabbing my arm and spinning me back around to him. "I'm sorry. I don't mean to make it sound like that. They have mind tricks and they don't--"
I laugh out loud and he looks confused. I can't help it. Of all arguments for Jacob to try to use. "That's true, Jacob, and Edward in particular does. But it doesn't actually work on me. Thank you for your help with Victoria. Your timing was impeccable. I could always use more friends, Jacob, but not if they're going to constantly call me stupid."
I cross the room to my father, who looks a little concerned. I don't know how much, if any, of that he heard. "I'm ready to go. I can have Edward meet me half way if you'd like to come back."
"Are you all right?" he asks, glaring over my shoulder looking at Jacob.
"Yeah, I'm just tired," I lie, which I suppose isn't a complete lie. I am tired of this. I'm tired of constantly having to defend myself, I'm tired of constantly having to be in danger and look over my shoulder, I'm tired of having to make up excuses and lie to my parents, I'm tired of having to repeatedly tell people I hardly know why I love who I love. I'm tired of having other people call the shots in my life.
"Did he do something again?" Charlie asks sternly.
"No, dad," I reply.
Charlie gives Jacob his 'I have a gun and know how to use it' glare and then looks back to me. "All right. Well, I do kind of want to come back, but I'll bring you home."
"It's okay, dad," I say quickly. "I can call Edward and he can meet us half way." Which happens to be the treaty line.
"All right, Bells," he says, grabbing my coat from the hook by the door. Jacob looks displeased. I can feel their stares boring into me. Charlie may feel comfortable here, but I don't.