Chapter 21 – Perfect
Rachel huffed as the dice landed on a two and a three, sending her to the exact space she was avoiding. Beth giggled as Rachel moved her piece and then gave Beth two of her cards. She really hated this game Kurt bought for Beth; somehow she always lost and she wasn't even trying to let Beth win. She blamed her terrible luck at rolling the dice. She didn't know why, but the dice always seemed to be against her in every game she played.
"I don't like this game," Rachel said, crossing her arms.
"I do," Beth said, rolling the dice.
"Of course you like it," Rachel replied. "You always beat me."
"I also beat Kurt," Beth remarked with a smirk that reminded Rachel all too well of Puck.
"Speaking of Kurt," Rachel said, turning toward the door when she heard it begin to slide open.
"Kurt!" Beth said, jumping up, and running over to him.
"Excited to see me?" Kurt asked with a laugh when Beth nearly jumped on him.
"How was your day?" Rachel asked as she stood.
Kurt rolled his eyes. "Not my best. Josh H. decided to quit today, so I spent an hour trying to call someone in to fill his spot since we were swamped. I finally got Jess to agree to come in, but she was almost an hour late. Then Jane got sick midway through her shift and had to go home, so we were still down a person."
"I'm surprised you made it home on time," Rachel commented.
"I probably should have stayed, but I wasn't going to make you miss your date," Kurt said with a shrug.
"I'm sure—" she glanced at Beth and looked back at Kurt.
"Why don't you go set up your easel or a game for us to play?" Kurt asked, bending down to look at Beth. "It's just going to be us tonight, so we can do whatever you want."
"Okay," Beth said, turning on her heel.
"As I was going to say, I'm sure Quinn would have understood if we had to postpone our date," Rachel said.
"That doesn't mean you should postpone it," Kurt replied.
"I'm just saying you shouldn't let my life dictate yours," Rachel stated. "If you need to stay at work—"
"Rachel, it's okay," Kurt interrupted. "I'm sure they will get along just fine without me. Besides, it's not like I really wanted to stay late. Believe me, I was happy to have an excuse to escape that madhouse."
"I just feel sometimes like I put too much on you," Rachel said with a sigh. "You didn't ask for this."
"I may not have asked for it, but if I wanted to leave, I would," Kurt said. "Now, go get ready for your date. You wouldn't want to keep Quinn waiting."
Rachel smiled softly and gave Kurt a hug. "Thank you."
"Go!" Kurt said with a laugh.
Rachel smiled and released him. She had been very much looking forward to tonight and would have been incredibly disappointed if she'd had to cancel. Quinn had been so busy with work that she hadn't seen her since their first date, and she'd only spoken to her once on the phone. Today was the first day Quinn didn't have to work over, so she had called on Wednesday and asked Rachel if would like to go on a second date. Of course Rachel immediately said yes, eager to see her again.
She was nervous, but not as nervous as last time. This time, she was more excited than anything. There was no doubt it was a date in both of their minds, so she didn't have to worry about that, and now she knew that her feelings for Quinn were real. She was still hesitant about the fact that it was Quinn she had those feelings for, but she was trying to put that out of her mind and simply enjoy it all. It was easier said than done, but she was trying at least.
"Do you know where you're going tonight?" Kurt asked through the curtain.
"I have no idea," Rachel answered. "Quinn is the one planning this date."
"Any idea how late you will be?" Kurt asked.
"I'm sure I won't be back terribly late," Rachel replied. "I'm sure Quinn is very tired after this week." She held up the two outfits she'd picked out the night before. "Dress or skirt?"
Kurt popped his head in. "What top are you wearing with the skirt?"
"The grey one I bought last week," Rachel replied.
"The skirt, then," Kurt answered.
Rachel smiled as she looked at the skirt. "I thought so."
"How is your food?" Quinn asked after Rachel took her second bite.
"I already regret not coming here sooner," Rachel replied. "And I'm certainly going to have to come back one day with Kurt."
"Good." Quinn smiled. "I'm glad."
"So, what was going on at work that you had to stay so late every night?" Rachel asked.
Quinn shook her head. "Boring stuff. One of the printers was done for a while and we promised a client we'd get his novel to him by Monday. It put us behind a lot and since there are so few of us, we've had to work around the clock."
"Did you guys get it complete?" Rachel wondered.
"This afternoon," Quinn said with a nod. "We overnighted them, so he should have them on Monday as promised."
"So you have tomorrow off?" Rachel asked.
"Thankfully, yes," Quinn said with a smile. "I know you can't really catch up on sleep, but that isn't going to stop me from trying."
Rachel laughed. "I can't blame you. I have to say, I'm a little surprised you didn't wish to spend the night in."
"As much as I was looking forward to resting, I was looking forward to this more," Quinn replied.
Rachel ducked her head. She didn't know if she would ever get used to hearing things like that from Quinn. For so long, all she heard were insults, so hearing that she actually liked spending time with her was a little hard to comprehend sometimes. Even Finn, who she was with for years, didn't say things like that to her.
"When does school start back for you?" Quinn asked.
"Monday," Rachel answered, taking a sip of water.
"Thankfully, I still have another week off," Quinn commented.
"I hope things go okay once Kurt and I are back in school," Rachel said. "It's been difficult enough juggling work and Beth, and now we're going to have to try juggling all three. I believe we've set our schedules so everything will be doable, but I think we need to look for a babysitter, just in case something comes up. The first few weeks will be the hardest since Beth isn't in school yet. Luckily, Zoe is going to watch her a few times; she's going to take Beth and Emma to the zoo one day, so I'm sure she'll love that."
"You know, if you ever need me, you can call," Quinn replied.
"I appreciate it, but—I didn't know if you would want to," Rachel said, watching Quinn closely. "I didn't want to make things difficult for you."
"Things are always difficult for me," Quinn remarked, looking away.
"Is that why you don't speak with Beth a lot?" Rachel asked.
"You noticed, huh?" Quinn asked. "Yes. I just—what do you say to someone you gave up? I know she doesn't know, but I know. Every time I look at her, I'm reminded of everything. I want to know her, but at the same time—"
"You're afraid to," Rachel finished for her when Quinn didn't say anything else.
"Yeah," Quinn softly said.
"I understand," Rachel replied.
"Do you?" Quinn asked.
"You're afraid to get too close," Rachel stated. "In a way, she's a reminder of all your mistakes even if you don't necessarily view her as a mistake."
"Something like that," Quinn said with a shrug of her shoulder.
"It's okay," Rachel said, giving her a smile. "She isn't going anywhere; you can take all the time you need."
Quinn bit her lip for a moment before releasing it and asking, "Why did I waste so much time?"
"With Beth?" Rachel asked, furrowing her brows slightly.
"With you," Quinn answered.
"Oh," Rachel said, feeling herself blushing.
"I don't know why I didn't see you sooner," Quinn continued. "In high school, I thought I hated everything about you, but now I have no idea what any of those things were. You haven't even really changed; you're still the same Rachel."
"I may be the same, but you're a different Quinn," Rachel said, looking at her.
Quinn smiled softly. "Maybe."
Rachel realized what they were discussing may not be the best topic of conversation for a second date, but it was nice that Quinn was opening up a little bit. There was still so much she had to learn about the blonde. It felt like most of what she knew was simply from observing her throughout high school. As long as she'd known Quinn, she was a closed off person, but when she thought no one was looking, she did drop her guard a bit.
"What are you thinking about?" Quinn asked.
"How I wish I knew more about you," Rachel said honestly.
"You'll get there," Quinn said, taking a drink from her glass.
"I certainly hope so," Rachel said with a smile.
Rachel walked down the street with a content smile on her face. After dinner, Quinn took her to the newest Broadway show, and then on the way back to Quinn's apartment, they decided to stop for ice cream. It was just down the street from Quinn's place, so once they were done there, they decided to walk. Everything about the night had been wonderful, and she couldn't think of a more perfect ending.
"Do you like your ice cream?" Quinn asked.
"It's very good," Rachel said with a smile. "Would you like to try it?"
To her surprise, Quinn leaned over and licked the ice cream. Rachel's eyes followed the motion, unable to stop herself from watching Quinn's tongue as it slowly licked the surface. Judging by Quinn's slight smirk when she pulled away, it had the desired effect she was hoping it would have.
Rachel cleared her throat. "How is it?"
"It's okay," Quinn said with a shrug. "I would offer you some of mine, but—you know."
"Yeah," Rachel said, trailing off.
"So—are you still doing okay?" Quinn asked. "You know, with what happened a few weeks ago."
Rachel shrugged. "I've been doing alright. I think it was just a temporary breakdown, and now that I've dealt with my feelings, hopefully it will never happen again. Or if it does, next time I will be a little more prepared for my feelings on the situation."
"If it ever does happen again, yo—"
Quinn got cut off when a man bumped between Rachel and Quinn. The brunette turned with her hands on her hips, staring after the pedestrian, who didn't even stop or look back.
"Excuse you!" Rachel called after him. "I swear, some people are so rude. The least you could do is apologize or at least acknowledge when you walking between two people, bumping into both of them." Rachel looked at her date. "Quinn? Are you okay?"
"I'm fine," the blonde said.
"You're not fine," Rachel said, furrowing her brows in concern at the sight of Quinn's hand on her back and a pained expression on her face.
Quinn sighed. "Don't worry about it, okay?"
"Of course I'm going to worry about it," Rachel replied. "Did he hurt you? Maybe you should sit down."
"Rachel," Quinn said, grabbing her arm when she tried to guide the blonde to the nearest stoop. "I'll be okay."
"Are you sure?" Rachel asked.
Quinn nodded. "I was—" She sighed and looked away. "Almost two years ago, right after I moved here, I was in an accident."
"A car accident?" Rachel asked.
"Actually, I was walking down the sidewalk when a car went over the curb and hit me," Quinn said.
Rachel gasped. "You were hit by a car?!"
"Yeah," Quinn replied. "I was in a wheelchair for a couple of months while my back healed and then I went through physical therapy for months to learn to walk again. It's not as bad as it was, but my back hurts sometimes. It's probably from working so much and not getting enough rest, so when he ran into me it—look, don't worry. I'll be fine."
"I—" Rachel shook her head, stunned that she had never heard about any of this before. "How did I never hear about your accident before now?"
"No one knew," Quinn replied. "Well, almost no one. Puck and Santana knew, but I swore them to secrecy. I didn't want everyone feeling sorry for me and I definitely didn't want anyone coming up here to see how I was doing. It was bad enough being in that wheelchair without everyone's pity."
"We should get you home," Rachel said, throwing her hand into the air. "I'll get us a cab."
"Rachel," Quinn grabbed Rachel's hand, holding it in her own. "It's only a few more blocks; I can make it."
"Are you certain?" Rachel asked. "I don't want you hurting yourself just because you're stubborn and don't like to admit when you need help."
Quinn smiled and squeezed Rachel's hand. "I'm sure."
Rachel didn't know if she was convinced, but when Quinn pulled her along, she followed. She was still shocked that Quinn could keep something like that secret, not only from her, but from the rest of her friends. She couldn't imagine Quinn going through all that alone; if it was her, she would want all her friends by her side to make everything easier. Of course, people were different and she supposed Quinn was a much more private person than she was.
"You know, that's why I finally came out," Quinn commented. "And why I tried to kiss you. I realized how short life can be. I didn't want my life to be one big lie and I told myself that I would stop being so afraid of who I really was. It still wasn't easy, but I slowly accepted myself and started coming out to people. Mostly people here before finally telling Santana and Brittany and then my mom."
"So—you tried to kiss me because you realized life is short?" Rachel asked.
Quinn smiled. "Kind of. I promised myself I would start going for the things I wanted, not what other people wanted for me." Quinn shrugged. "I had to know if you felt something for me like I felt for you. And when I was standing there that night, I just—I went for it."
"Well, even if I didn't let you kiss me that night, I must say I'm glad you went for it," Rachel said with a smile. "It certainly made me begin questioning a few things."
Quinn laughed lightly. "Then I guess it was worth you turning away."
"Come on," Rachel said, giving Quinn's hand a gentle squeeze. "You may be fine, but I would feel better if we got you home."
"Your roommate isn't home, is she?" Rachel asked as Quinn led them into the apartment.
"No," Quinn said, throwing her keys down on the small table in the entryway. "I'm sure she's out at some bar or something. She'll stumble in sometime in the middle of the night, hopefully alone. There are some things I hate waking up to and her having sex is one of them."
Rachel scrunched her nose up. "That makes me even more thankful to have Kurt as a roommate."
She followed Quinn over to the couch and stood until Quinn was seated and comfortable. Despite what Quinn said, Rachel was still worried about her. And by the small grunt of pain when the blonde sat down, she had a right to be worried. She didn't want the other woman to overdo herself, and especially not for Rachel's sake. As much as Rachel had wanted to see Quinn and go on a second date with her, she would have understood Quinn's need to have a night of rest.
"Are you going to sit?" Quinn asked, looking up at her.
"Oh, yes," Rachel said, sitting on the cushion next to Quinn.
"You're still worrying, aren't you?" Quinn asked, looking amused.
Rachel sighed. "I can't help it."
"Which is exactly why I didn't tell you sooner," Quinn remarked. "I hate people worrying about me or acting like I'm going to break."
"Well, if you haven't noticed, it's in my nature to worry," Rachel stated. "Whether it's about this or something else, I will always be concerned for your wellbeing. It comes with being my friend."
"Then I guess I better get used to it, huh?" Quinn asked with a slight smirk.
"Yes," Rachel said with a nod.
Quinn's smirk grew and Rachel watched as her tongue slowly moistened her lips. This time, Quinn was the one to lean in first and Rachel closed her eyes when their lips made contact. She eagerly returned the kiss, but kept her arms by her sides, too afraid of hurting Quinn more to wrap them around the other woman like she really wanted.
Rachel parted her lips ever so slightly as Quinn leaned forward a bit more. Rachel finally rested her hands on Quinn's waist, hoping it wouldn't hurt the blonde and that it would make things a little less awkward. The moment her hands were on Quinn, the blonde gave a barely-there moan and her tongue swiped across Rachel's lower lip, prompting her to part her mouth further. Her own tongue met Quinn's in the middle, sliding easily against each other.
Rachel didn't like to compare people when it came to kissing, but Quinn was certainly skilled. As their tongues tangled together, one of her hands buried itself in Quinn's long hair while her other wrapped around Quinn, trying to pull her even closer. She could feel Quinn smile against her mouth as she leaned in closer, capturing Rachel's bottom lip between her teeth. When Quinn's tongue ran across the spot she'd bit, Rachel let out a slight whimper and tried to go in for another kiss, but Quinn pulled back.
"Are you okay?" Rachel asked. "I didn't hurt you, did I?"
Quinn laughed lightly and shook her head. "You didn't."
Rachel craned her neck to look at the time and sighed. "I should go; it's getting late and I promised Kurt I would be home a little earlier tonight. I feel bad that he had to watch Beth after working all day, but I really wanted to see you."
Quinn smiled and nodded slightly. "I'll walk you to the door."
Rachel stood first, offering Quinn her hand. "If you need help with anything, I want you to tell me right now. I would hate to leave you here alone with an injured back."
"I'm fine," Quinn said again. "I promise. As you said, it is late and it's been a long week, so I'm just going to get ready and then go to bed."
"Okay," Rachel replied. "I just wanted to be certain. And it would be rather rude of me not to offer my help."
Quinn leaned in, giving Rachel a soft kiss. Rachel wanted to wrap her arms around Quinn and drag her back to the couch to pick up where they had left off, but it was late and she really did need to get home. Even if part of her wanted to stay just a little bit longer.
"Sorry," Quinn whispered when she pulled away. "I know I said I would never try to kiss you again, but I hoped that was no longer a promise you would hold me to."
"I think I can forgive you," Rachel said with a soft smile.
"I'll call you," Quinn said, giving Rachel a quick peck.
"Next week will probably be rather hectic with school beginning, but I would very much like to get together one night," Rachel replied.
Quinn nodded and smiled back as she opened the door. "Night."
"Goodnight, Quinn," Rachel said with one last look at Quinn before leaving the apartment.
The moment Rachel walked into the apartment, she heard the television and knew Kurt was still up. As she walked toward the living room, she put her purse and keys on the table, and walked to the fridge to grab a bottle of water. When she finally walked into the living room, Kurt turned off the television and craned his neck to look at her.
"How did the date go?" he asked.
Rachel smiled. "It went very well."
"I'm shocked," Kurt remarked. "You haven't had a successful second date in a year."
Rachel laughed lightly as she sat next to him. "I know. Quinn is—she's surprising."
"What did you do?" Kurt asked.
"Dinner and a Broadway show," Rachel replied.
Kurt nodded. "The perfect Rachel Berry date."
"It was perfect," Rachel commented. "And not only because the food was amazing and the show was spectacular; I actually just enjoy being with Quinn. Who knew I could have such a wonderful time simply talking to her?"
"So, I guess a third date is in your future," Kurt said.
"Definitely," Rachel replied with a smile. "So what did you and Beth do while I was gone?"
"The usual," Kurt answered. "We watched a movie, played a few games, and ordered pizza." He nodded to the kitchen. "There's some leftovers if you're hungry. She did have a nightmare not long after she fell asleep, but she woke herself up before I ran in and then she was fine."
"Did she say what the nightmare was about?" Rachel wondered.
Kurt shook his head. "I asked her and she said something about lights, but that was all she said before falling asleep again."
"You let her stay up late, didn't you," Rachel said, eyeing Kurt.
"I don't know what you're talking about," Kurt said, crossing his arms over his chest.
"Sure you don't," Rachel replied, not believing it for one minute. "You know we need to get her on a regular schedule before she begins school. It will make the transition easier for everyone."
"I know, but we were in the middle of a game," Kurt said. "I didn't think it would take nearly as long as it did."
Rachel shook her head. She knew Kurt was doing the best he could, but she was afraid Beth would begin to get spoiled. She was all for spoiling her to an extent, but she didn't want her to be one of those children that couldn't take the word 'no'. Luckily, she wasn't at that point; she wouldn't throw a tantrum or anything, but she would pout. Sometimes the pouting was worse than the screaming; it made Rachel feel guilty because she would like to let Beth get everything she wanted considering all she had been through that year.
"If I tell you something, do you promise to keep it a secret?" Rachel asked.
"Of course," Kurt said, looking eager at the prospect of learning a secret.
"I don't know if she would want me telling you, but she didn't say not to," Rachel began. "Regardless, do not tell anyone, please. I wouldn't want Quinn angry with me."
"Is it something bad?" Kurt asked.
"She was in an accident about two years ago," Rachel divulged. "She was hit by a car while walking along the sidewalk and was apparently in a wheelchair for a while."
Kurt's mouth dropped. "How did we not know this?"
"She only told Noah and Santana," Rachel said with a shrug.
"How did you find out?" Kurt asked.
"A guy bumped into us today and I could tell she was in pain," Rachel replied. "I asked her what was wrong and she eventually told me."
"Wow," Kurt said, sitting back.
"I know," Rachel remarked. "I was shocked. It's why she's changed so much, though. She said she realized how short life can be and that she didn't want to live a lie anymore. I'm not saying I'm thankful she was in such a horrific accident, but I am thankful she was able to change and be who she really is. It's just unfortunate that it took that happening for her to realize it."
Rachel turned her head towards Beth's room when she though she heard a noise. It sounded like a slight cry, but it could have come from outside.
"What is it?" Kurt asked.
Rachel shook her head. "I thought I might have heard Beth."
"I'll check on her," Kurt said, standing up.
"You go to bed," Rachel said. "I know you were only waiting up to see how my date went."
Kurt laughed. "That's true."
"Goodnight, Kurt," Rachel said, kissing his cheek. "And thank you for watching Beth tonight."
Kurt shrugged. "I'm living vicariously. It's been so long since I've been on a date that I don't remember what it's like."
Rachel laughed as Kurt walked into his room and then made her way to Beth's bedroom. When she looked inside, the little girl was asleep and looked completely peaceful. Rachel smiled at the sight and backed out of the room, closing the curtain behind her. She walked across the living room, and with a yawn, she headed into her own bedroom.