Title – You Found Me
POV – Edward
Setting – Killeen, Texas (near Fort Hood, Texas)
Mortality – All human
Time Setting – Fall of 2008
Summary – The worst part of being an army wife is not the wait, it is when the wait is over and you find yourself with no husband and son with no father. That's the hardest part and at that point you can only find comfort in a certain person, when does the comfort become something else? Bella is what we call an army wife. She is married to Sergeant Black. He has been in the army since he was 17. He is best friends with Edward Cullen, a guy who is dedicated to the army but doesn't realize that it's taking a toll on his life. Tragedy strikes and soon there are two people left and they must depend on one another to get through it. Can they get through it without making a sinful mistake?
A/N –

Its been 18 days
Since I'd look at myself
I don't wanna have to change
If I don't then no one will
Is it my state of mind
Or is it just everything else
I don't wanna have to be here
I don't understand it now

Cause its been 18 days
Since I first held you
But to me it feels just like
It feels like a lifetime
I'm trying hard to re-arrange
Some say its the hardest thing to do
But that's another 18 days
Without you..

Time after time
I've been through this
You show me what it means to live
You give me hope when I was hopeless
As my days fade to night
I remember that state of mind
I'm soaring straight into your heart
And I'll fly high
–18 Days, Saving Abel

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Re-Arrange

EPOV (Edward)

I despised Alice for making the dress so…attractive, I could think that, right? It was so perfect for her, I tried to avoid looking at her that way but it was extremely difficult. These past couple months were painful for various reasons. Some included the fact that I felt a void that wasn't easily filled. I was trying to figure out what was real and what I wanted. I wanted to not see a beautiful girl but instead that is what I saw when I thought of her. She was no longer a vulnerable girl. She was now a beautiful, vulnerable woman whom I felt the need to protect. It was no longer a responsibility it was a need.

"About what exactly? You made things as clear as day." She asked harshly.

"I called and called and called. Bella I'm sorry." It was true I had called so many times and she never picked up. I really regretted what I said. I never got the guts to go see her because I just wasn't ready to actually see her. It took a couple days for me to 'recover' from that night. I had so much stress and fear, and it just blew out of proportion. It was so hard to admit the truth, that I had somehow fallen for her,

"Was what you said a lie?" She challenged. Her eyes bore into me. That night I was so out of it, and I said horrible things to her, it wasn't until later that I realized just what I said.

I didn't say anything right away. I didn't want to lie to her. "Not entirely."

"Then we have nothing to talk about. You made it clear that it's painful to be around me, you hate me, so why are with me at this moment?" She had been clearly hurt and I desperately searched for a way to fix it.

"I don't hate you but…it is hard to be around you. Bella listen to me, you are a part of my life now, and it's completely apart from what I told you that night. I miss you and miss Jake, it's a gap in my life and I don't want to live with that. What I told you is…you weren't supposed to know. I flipped out and what I said was unacceptable. I apologize. I didn't mean what I said."

"So what's the truth? I don't want you to sugar coat it, just say it."

Jake stirred in his sleep. I patted his back to calm soothe him. "I am not Jake's father and I understand that I won't ever replace his father but I feel like I am somewhat his father. I don't want to stay away from him."

"Do you think I don't know he loves you? He adores you. You're the closest thing he has to a father. He misses you and I'll do whatever it takes to make him happy." Her words were like needles on my back, I told her the truth. I loved this kid. He was someone so special to me, he was like my son and I didn't want to hurt him. I had missed holding him and soothing him, I felt like someone had taken my child away.

I nodded. "I made a promise and I won't break it. Don't worry about what I said, it never happened. Forget it ever did. I know you don't need this right now and that's fine, I'll be fine. It's not what you think it is. I care for you but it stops there." I lied. It went beyond care, but I was not going to tell her, if I needed to sacrifice my love for her than I would. She would never correspond to me, as a matter a fact I wouldn't allow it. It feels bad enough to feel something for her much less asking for her correspondence. I had been convinced by my new doctor that I couldn't help to feel so it's no reason to feel guilty. The only thing I could help is acting; he understood that I wasn't ready to be with her. I never would be. That would be an undeniably deserved guilt, she couldn't ever handle something like this either. I wouldn't put her through that. My feelings could be suppressed and things could go back the way they were. Hopefully they would fade away hopefully it was simply a whim.

"So you're just going to ignore it?"

"There's nothing to ignore, Bella, I only want to protect you and to be in your life as a friend."

She didn't hold my gaze. "I look at you and I see hope. I see could what be. There's a scar in my heart. It still hurts, Edward, it hurts but you make it better. I can live with you around. I would have given up on life without you. You make want to live."

I looked into her eyes as I grasp what she's saying. "I won't ever do anything about it." I warned finally negating my lie. "I won't ever love you outside my heart. I will never be anything more than your friend. It's all I can be. You and I will never happen. It can't it goes against my everything."

She nodded. "I know. We never talked about this, agreed?"

"Agreed…this never happened."

In my arms Jake was startled by a roar of thunder. The left side of the indoor courtyard was a glass wall. Outside it was pitch black. Lightning was the only thing that illuminated the sky. The weather was bad, it was pouring non stop. I had heard the rain in the background but never realized it was raining so much.

He began to cry. "Jake, its okay." I assured him.

"Let me have him." Bella asked. Once she took him he cried even more and he reached out to me and I took him back.

I bounced him up and down until he calmed.

"He's tired."

I nodded. "Yeah and the weather is bad, we might have to spend the night. It's really coming down."

She looked out. "Yeah, it might freeze over. It's really cold and it's raining like crazy. I should get a room."

"Edward, the toast," Alice came over to me. "Come on."

I sighed, this was supposed to be Emmett's place but he didn't make it back in time. I usually did write him the toasts. I did it when it was their twentieth anniversary but it never presented them. "Coming."

"Hurry, we're going to get off schedule." She never changed, she was Monica from Friends, I swear she was, just a more fashionable version.

I rolled my eyes. "Come on Bella." I went to the center table where my parents waited for Alice and me.

Everyone's attention turned towards me. "How has everyone's been? I would like to thank everyone for coming to celebrate my parents' anniversary. It's not only an anniversary, it's is a celebration of the love my parents have given to each other and to me and Alice and Emmett. Though Emmett could not be here I am sure he shares the same sentiment as Alice and I do. She and I both would like to thank my mother and father for raising us into decent people. They have given us everything and we're very thankful for that. Happy anniversary mom and dad, I hope there are many more to come." I raised my glass before I put it back down on the table. I wasn't certain but I doubted alcohol worked well with anti-anxiety pills.

There was dinner then dancing till midnight.

My mother approached us. "How about you two dance, I'll take Jake. Have fun."

"Mom –"

"Edward, don't be rude, one dance." It was apparent it was going to happen because Bella could never say no to my mother and evidently neither could I. I transferred a sleeping Jake to my mother's arms. I held out my hand and Bella took it. I wrapped my arm around her and she rested her hand on my shoulder.

Just like a star across my sky,
just like an angel off the page,
you have appeared to my life,
feel like I'll never be the same,
just like a song in my heart,
just like oil on my hands,
Honor to love you

Still I wonder why it is,
I don't argue like this,
with anyone but you,
we do it all the time,
blowing out my mind,

You've got this look I can't describe,
you make me feel I'm alive,
when everything else is au fait,
without a doubt you're on my side,
heaven has been away too long,
can't find the words to write this song of your love,

"I'm sorry I'm such a bad dancer." She whispered.

I chuckled. "You're not bad at all." I pulled back and gave her a slow turn. "See it's all in the leading." Her cheeks were stained a scarlet red.

Now I have come to understand,
the way it is,
It's not a secret anymore,
'cause we've been through that before,
from tonight I know that you're the only one,
I've been confused and in the dark,
now I understand.

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The song is Like A Star by Corinne Bailey Rae. I love it and it's so sweet. Next chapter will be called Make You Feel My Love and a new character will come in, you'll love her. Please review, tell me what you think.

~Toodles.