Everyday Chapter 21, an evangelion fanfic

EVERYDAY

CHAPTER 21

BY WONGA316

CONTACT
Email - wonga316(at)yahoo(dot)com(dot)au
MSN - wonga316(at)hotmail(dot)com
Yahoo – wonga316(at)yahoo(dot)com(dot)au
AIM – wonga316
LiveJournal – wonga316(dot)livejournal(dot)com

ASSISTANT DIRECTOR / CATERING / STUNT DOUBLE
TheWickerMan (Some say his best friend is an electric back massager, all we know he's called TheWickerMan)

PROOF READER / EXECUTIVE PRODUCER / TEA LADY
Lord Raa (Some say he can out stare fish which have no eyelids, all we know he's called Lord Raa)

DATE POSTED
20070119

AUTHOR'S NOTES
This is an AU fic where Shinji has the normal yet dysfunctional family. No EVA or Angels and I've decided to include almost all the characters from the anime. There is no real point to the fic. It's just some fun and a creative outlet. Hopefully it'll spark some better ideas for my other stories. As a result some hardcore NGE fans will find that some characters are severely OOC but it is an AU without Angels and EVA…

"…" Normal speech

'…' Thoughts

(…) Computer / phone / other chat (you will know what I mean…)

NERV HEAVY INDUSTRIES

Asuka couldn't feel anything. Her senses didn't work. Her brain tried sending instructions to the rest of her body but they wouldn't be obeyed. She was reliving Shinij's fall at the school gym hall all over again but this time it was much worst. The young woman didn't admit it to anyone but when she watched Shinji's body hurdle towards the stage, she was absolutely scared. The only other time she remembered being that scared was when her parents divorced but she had Shinji for support. This time she had no one.

"MY BABY!!!"

The terrified shrill came from the person hanging onto her ankles. The next thing Asuka knew was that she was being swung through the air. She felt like a giant log a bare-chested, bearded Scotsman would throw during caber toss competition.

Before Asuka had even landed for the record breaking throw, Yui was already half way down the stairs.

"Wow. Look at her fly," Mana said in awe as her main rival for Shinji's affections sailed threw the air like a javelin. Hikari and her sister both cringed as they waited for Asuka's not so gentle impact with the remaining gantry.

"YOU SAVE HIM NOW!" Yui screamed as the palm of her hand slammed into Naoko's face. Her fingers wrapped around her head like octopus tentacles and they weren't going to let go any time soon.

"Damn… That's gotta hurt," Kyoko mused as see watched her friend's limbs flail around under the suffocating hold of Shinji's mother.

"YOU'RE NOT HELPING!" Like lightning Yui's other hand shot out and latched into Kyoko's tongue. The vice like grip caused all the blood to rush at the tip of the tongue and swell.

The three remaining school girls quickly gathered around and began trying to convince Yui to release the other two so they could help Shinji. But the bloodlust in Yui's eyes was much stronger than any of their words.

Suddenly there was a mechanical hiss from the direction of the vat where Shinji had supposedly fallen in. Everyone stopped what they were doing and looked over. It was Ritsuko and she was being held up by Maya.

"All of you… are completely useless…" the blonde rasped. Her short breathlessness and irregular heart beat was proof that she was still feeling the effects of the stun gun from earlier.

What Ritsuko had done was activate the emergency release. This would pump the contents of the vat to a waste overflow. Working with possible hazardous materials had ensured that NERV built several safety mechanisms. The truth was that Ritsuko designed all the safety mechanisms at NERV Heavy Industries for her own sake and not to comply with any workplace health and safety laws. The woman wasn't stupid she worked on a daily basis with Yui and Co. with dangerous chemicals and machinery.

"Shinji!" Not content that the draining process was going quickly enough, the crazed mother picked up both of her friends by the ankle and began swinging them against the base of the vat like a lumberjack trying to fell a grand old tree. A loud hollow dong similar to the banging of an empty cargo ship hull rang out as Kyoko's and Naoko's heads made contact with the steel vat.

Surprisingly, Yui's efforts did seem to have some effect. The vat slowly inched over its side with each strike until it had reached the point of no return.

"Now would be a good time to run," Ritsuko suggested to everyone as the tilting vat caused the already weaken structure of the walkway to vibrate. Fragments of broken steel began raining down as the girls scattered for safety screaming hysterically. Ritsuko had to be helped by Maya and the pair of them hobbled along. Everyone's screaming was soon over awed by the sound of twisting and falling metal. As the vat hit the ground, a plume of dust and debris filled the room. The high tech laboratory now resembled an apocalyptic landscape with devastation everywhere. As the dusted settled, they could make out the sound of the remnant NHI081206 pour from the holding vat onto the ground.

"Shinji!" Mana didn't wait for anything and leapt out from her cover.

"No! Wait!" Ritsuko called out to her. "Do touch the liquid! We don't know what it will do."

The most sensible person from the whole group still had her thinking cap on and feared what her mother and Kyoko did to NHI081206.

"But what about Shinji?!" the school girl shouted back.

"We have some hazmat suits. Let's get them on before-"

SPLAT

Just as Ritsuko was about to finish, the sound of bodies hit the floor cover in the altered liquid.

"Awww… my head hurts… hurts so much…" Naoko whined as she pulled her self up from the wet floor. A lump was starting to form where her skull made contact with the steel structure.

"It's safe!" Mana ran towards the middle of the wreckage after Naoko appeared normal while covered in the fluid.

"I said wait!" Ritsuko's words fell on deaf ears as the rest of the gang followed Mana's lead.

"Forget it… See if I care if that stuff makes your hair fall out!" she shouted to them, upset that she was being ignored. Again.

They got on all fours and began searching through the wet wreckage for Shinji. After a few minutes of scrounging around everyone began to get nervous. That was until they heard a strained cough. They looked in the direction of the sound and found that Yui was already there.

"Get out of the way! Let me see!" Asuka pushed past a couple of people not caring who they were. The young girl had also survived the collapse. She found that Yui was standing over a pair of soaked hospital garments. The coughing the sputter was definitely coming from underneath the clothes. Soon everyone had formed a tight ring around the items. Suddenly a tiny hand popped out from underneath which startled everyone. The hand was attached to tiny arm and a tiny body followed.

"What the hell…" Shinji pulled his wet carcass into a sitting position. His head was still spinning from the second free fall in just as many days.

"Shinji?" His mother called out to him with an uncertain voice.

"Yeah…" he ran his hands through his wet hair trying to shake out the excess liquid. While doing this he quickly realised the fat his clothes were missing and immediately covered himself with is hands.

"What's going on?! Where are my clothes?!" everyone circling him pointed to the wet clothes he was practically standing on. Shinji quickly grabbed it and covered himself. It was then he realised that his hospital gown had mysteriously become larger. He held it up and it was about the size of a bed sheet to him. In his haste to correct his sudden case of nudity, Shinji also completely forgot about his broken leg.

"Hang on… Didn't I…" He quickly looked down to where his leg should have been restrained but the cast was missing. Carefully and cautiously he moved his leg and realised that he now had fully mobility.

"HAHA! This is awesome! I don't know what you guys did but my leg is okay now!" Shinji stood up and stamped the ground, testing his leg.

"Ah Shinji…" His mother called out to him again.

"Huh? Hey, how come you are all so big?" he asked looked up at everyone. Then someone held a piece of shiny chrome debris they picked up from the ground in front of him.

"OH MY GOD!!! WHAT THE…"

TOKYO 3 – PRIVATE AIRPORT

Rei and Pen-pen waited patiently under the spotlights beside the runaway. She had changed out of her skin-tight cat-suit and now sported her school uniform. Ground crew scrambled around the pair as they quickly finalised the preparations for the arrival. In the distance a roar of twin jet engines gradually grew louder and louder. It signalled a private jet making its landing approach.

The jet landed with a skid of the tires and shot straight past Rei and Pen-pen. The gust of wind generated was too much for the bird and he had to grab onto Rei's skirt to keep him self from getting blown away.

The ground crew leapt into action. They used the tow car to taxi the jet plane after it had successfully come to a stop at the end of the runway. The aircraft was taxied all the way back to where Rei was standing and Pen-pen who was expressing his anger in a spouting of avian expletives.

As the whine of the jet turbines came to a stop, the cabin door opens and a boarding car with ladder was driven up to it. Rei walked towards the aircraft with a still annoyed Pen-pen in tow.

A woman stepped out of the aircraft and stretched her arms. She gave a loud yawn and surveyed the area. She was an older woman dressed in a traditional kimono. The type of fabric and attention to detail was second to none on the garment. It was the highest of quality and must have been custom made. She wore her hair up in a traditional bun held in place with a delicate flower clip and a pair of stylist chopsticks. Her hair was jet black with only the few grey lines which were the only sign of her true age. She worn little to no make up yet her skin was like porcelain china, unblemished and perfect.

"It's good to be back home," she said to herself as she breathed the fresh night air.

"OH MY! Rei darling!" the woman spotted Rei on the ground at the bottom of the stairs. She quickly raced down and greeted the young school girl with a warm hug.

"It's good to see you Ma'am. Did you have an enjoyable flight?" the female Ikari twin asked while getting the life squeezed out of her.

"How many times have I told you to call me Grandma?" Grandma Gohei Ikari told her grandchild.

"Yes, Grandmother." Rei pulled back from the embrace. "We must hurry I sense that my brother may be in peril."

While Rei was waiting for Gohei's arrive her sixth sense for Shinji was triggered and she was anxious to get back to him.

"I felt it as well but he's not in any immediate danger." The grandmother reassured her as she bent over to pick up Pen-pen. The Shinji sixth sense was beginning to look like a female Ikari trait.

"And you mister," She ruffled the crest on the top of his head. "Aren't you the clever little bird to send Grandma all those photos?" While Grandma Ikari was in the air she had ample time to review all the intelligence and photos the bird and her grand daughter team was able to collect.

"WARK!" 'Your piece of shit jet nearly blew me half way across to China!'

"Now, now Pen-pen. It's thanks you and Rei and I know everything that has been happening to Shinji. After we see him, I have some presents for everyone. I have some special fish and some fancy beer for you and Misato?" she spoke to the penguin and began walking towards to the car waiting for them.

"Wark?!" 'Fish?! Beer?! Hand them over right now! Hey are you listening to me?! Where the hell are we going?! Is the fish on the plane?! Why the hell are we walking away from the fish?! I want my beer women!'

NERV HEAVY INDUSTRIES HEADQUARTERS

"Take a deep breath in Shinji." Ritsuko instructed the poor boy as she held a stethoscope to his chest. Shinji did so but his breaths in were heavy and anxious. It was impossible for him to relax and his mind was still coming to terms with what had happened to him.

"Am I going to be okay?" he asked with a quiver in his voice.

"So far I haven't found anything out of the ordinary except for the obvious. Your heart rate, blood pressure and all other readings are normal. Then again it is a little hard to conduct a medical examination with a room full of people." Ritsuko and Shinji looked behind to find that everyone had followed them into one of NERV's first aid offices.

"What? Are we in the way?" Kyoko asked.

"Is my baby fine? Can I take him home now?" Yui reached forwarded with both arms only to have them slapped away by Ritsuko.

"All of you don't realise the severity of the situation. This isn't normal! We don't know if these changes in Shinji will be permanent or have some long lasting side effects." The temporary doctor told the group.

"Permanent? Side effects?" Shinji fretted.

"Look what you did?!" Yui half scolded Ritsuko then quickly picked up Shinji and pressed him into her chest "You scared my little Shinji."

"We have to take this seriously. It's not normal for a 1.75 metre person to be shrunk down to less than half a metre!"

"He's not shrunk. He's my Chibi-Shinji!" Yui pulled her miniature son up to her face and pepper him with kisses. As a result of falling in the vat of moisturizer modified by Naoko and Kyoko, Shinji had been shrunk to less than a third of his normal height. His body was in portion just a third smaller. The only good thing to come from all of it was his broken leg mending. Everyone assumed that Kyoko and Naoko missed something in the recoding but they didn't know about Pen-pen's contribution to the programming when he and Rei were collecting information for Grandma Ikari.

"He's so cute! I wanna hold him!" Naoko showing no signs of brain trauma after being used as an axe quickly tried to snatch Shinji from Yui. This started a fight for who would get to hold the poor chibi-fied lad.

"AHHH! Help me!" Shinji shouted as numerous hands roamed and pinched his new body. His cries for help were answered when Asuka stuck her hand into the crowd and yanked him out from the mob.

"Why do you always cause trouble for me baka?" Asuka asked the newly chibi-fied Shinji dangling from the end of her arm like a fish from the catch of the day.

"How is this my fault? I didn't ask to be shrunk. Do you think I enjoy being like this?" He said while hanging upside down.

Asuka had to force herself to not smile. She wouldn't admit it, but the miniature Shinji was extremely cute.

"Well at least your leg is healed now," Hikari said, it was typical of the class representative to look at the positives in a bad situation. She herself was trying not to stare at Shinji's adorable little body.

"Come on let's get you cleaned up." Asuka slung him over his shoulder and began making her way out of the first aid office.

"Huh?! Where are you taking me?! What do you mean clean me up?!" he asked while trying to free himself from Asuka's grasp.

"That's a good idea. We're all hitting showers!" Yui announced and lead a stampede to the showers to clean all the dust and muck on them.

"HEY! IS ANYONE LISTENING TO ME?!" Ritsuko shouted but it was too late.

"Be a good girl and clean up the mess Ritsu-chan." Naoko patted her daughter on top of the head like a little animal before running off with the rest of the group but it only came across as condescending gesture.

"Why do I always get stuck cleaning up after them?!" her complaints fell on deaf ears as the chatter of excited females and one very stressed male made it's way down the hallway.

"Well not this time!" Ritsuko was adamant. She was making a stand and then her cell phone began ringing.

"Yes! What is it!?!" she answered the call in an annoyed tone.

(That's no way to answer the telephone. Did you loose your manners while I was gone? You should be more elegant and ladylike) the woman replied on the other end.

"Huh? Who is this?!" Ritsuko recognised the voice from somewhere but just couldn't connect it to a face. She knew that she had definitely heard it before.

(You should say 'may I ask who is speaking' but we can talk about your manners and your love life when you let us in. Now be a dear and open the front gate)

"It can't be!" Ritsuko finally realised who it was and raced over to the nearest terminal to bring up the security camera feed from the front gate.

"Holy shit!" she gasped as Grandma Ikari waved into the camera from the back of a limousine with cell phone.

NERV HEAVY INDUSTRIES HEADQUARTERS – DECONTAMINATION SHOWERS

"GET AWAY FROM ME!" Shinji shouted as his newly acquired pipsqueak body ran cross the slippery showers floors. He ran awkwardly with his hands covering his nether regions which also hampered his speed.

"SHIN-CHAN! Get back here! We have to wash your back!" A fully naked Misato lead the chasing pack which consisted of everyone except for Asuka, Hikari and Yui. The three of them opted to casually wash themselves down while the other played chasing games.

"This reminds me of the time we all went to hot springs," Yui mused as she lathered up her arms.

"Whatever…" Asuka replied nonchalant.

"Must run away! Must run away! Must run away!" the tiny blur of a half metre tall naked Shinji flew right in front of them. The body conscious Hikari quickly shielded herself from the only male in the showers while Asuka and Yui continued as if nothing had happen.

"Kyoko! You head him off!" Misato gave the order as she continued to lead the naked pack of females after poor Shinji.

"Right!" Somehow the woman managed to get in front of Shinji. The lad didn't have time to stop and wet slippery tiles caused him to slide towards her.

"Come to mama." Instead of catching the slipping and sliding Shinji with her hands, the mother knelt down and stuck her chest out. The chibi-fied Shinji slotted right between Kyoko's chest like a key would fit a lock. As she stood up his little feet kicked around in a vain attempt to try and get away.

"Hey!" Misato yelled in an annoyed tone and then snatched Shinji to free him from one of his most pleasurable snares.

"Thanks Misato." The boy thanked the other woman as he sensed something resembling common sense prevailing. But he was expecting a little too much.

"Only I can do that to my Shin-chan!" Misato forcible shoved Shinji's head between her breasts.

"Hehehe…" the purple haired beauty giggled, "Your skin is so soft Shin-chan."

"Let me play with him!" Naoko jumped in holding something between her hands. It was a miniature mermaid costume.

"That's so cute!" Mana felt the scales made from sequins on the material between her fingers.

"Where did you get it from?" She asked.

"I just made it," Naoko Akagi said proudly.

"What just then?" Mana was shocked by the response.

"Of course. Don't you carry around an emergency cosplay sewing kit?" Naoko held up the outfit to judge the sizing as Shinji remained stuck between in Misato's breasts.

"I think the Little Red Riding Hood costume is what we should do next," Kodama suggested as she tickled Shinji's feet.

"That's a brilliant idea! I just happen to have the prefect material as well!" Before the Shinji dress up would even begin a hand grabbed onto Shinji ankle and yanked him free.

"What the?!" One moment his was suffocating under the mounds of fleshy goodness and the next he was planted back on the shower floors with water poured all over him. It was a quick and cold shock back to reality.

"Sit still." Shinji turned around to see that his rescuer was Asuka again.

"While don't you take a picture it last longer?" Asuka asked as Shinji's eyes fixated on her bare body. Her words quickly prompted him to whip his head around and slap his hands over his eyes.

"Awww… is my baby scared that the shampoo is going to hurt your eyes," Yui said while she began working in the shampoo rinse in her son's hair.

The playful banter continued with the new miniaturised Shinji as the object of everyone's attention. While his body may have been chibi-fied it still function and reacted like any normal fourteen year old boy's body would. As numerous hands wandered across him, it sparked off an involuntary reaction from the lower half of his body. The particular appendage had a mind of its own and began doing things which Shinji couldn't control.

"Oh my…" Yui gasped but then changed her tone. "I'm so proud. My Shinji has grown up to become a fine young man!"

"AHHH!!! EVERYONE STOP!!!" he pleaded.

"My Shin-chan's lollypop has comeback!" Misato rejoiced but before she could un-wrap her human sweet someone broke the moment.

"For God's sake I was knocking on the door for about five minutes!" Ritsuko yelled into the shower room.

"Ah! Ritsuko the lesbian has come to watch us shower!" Kyoko panicked and quickly covered herself which set off a chain reaction in the other girls as they all followed.

"I'M NOT A LESBIAN!!!" the blonde woman screamed defending her sexuality.

"A lesbian? Is there something that you haven't told Grandma?" a second woman's voice spoke which got everyone's attention again.

"Huh? Grandma?" Everyone questioned as Ritsuko stepped aside and through the steam a female figure approached the group.

"No…" Yui whispered under her breath as the mother and daughter locked eyes.

"Now, how about you greet your mother properly Yui-chan? The same goes to you as well Kyoko-chan, Naoko-chan," Grandma Ikari said to daughter and everyone.

"What are you doing here?!" in a panic she grabbed Shinji and hid him behind her. Kyoko and Naoko followed suit and help form a human wall shielding. The three knew that if Yui's mother found out what had happen to Shinji there would be consequences to be paid. Everyone else in the room looked on with interested as it appeared that the mother trio were intimidated by the presence of Gohei Ikari.

WHACK.

"How many times have I told you that you it's rude to ask questions with saying hello first?" Grandma delivered a blow to the top of Yui's head with a closed fist. She instantly grabbed the point of the blow and started rubbing it.

WHACK. WHACK.

Grandma delivered two more blows to Kyoko and Naoko. "Don't just sit next to her like statues. Say something."

"Is she really…" Mana began whispering to Misato but she cut her off before she could finish.

"Yup. That's Grandma Gohei Ikari. Yui's mother," Misato answered.

"Oh you must be Mana Kirashima; the only daughter and heir to the Kirashima Corporation. You attend the same school and class as my grandchild, Shinji," Grandma said approaching the young school girl.

"Yeah… how did you know?" Mana was surprised that the woman in front of her whom she had never met knew about her.

"I also know that you and Ms Sohryu have been vying for Shinji's affections before high school. It was a bit of good fortune that you and he won that holiday to the hot springs." Grandma continued as Mana just stood there unable to say anything.

"Of course that would have been a perfect getaway for just the two of you except that particular parties decided to get themselves involved." Daggered eyes shot over in the mothers' direction.

"Like hell I would let her and Shinji go alone," Asuka expressed her view which caused Gohei to turn her attention to her.

"My young Asuka… I bet your father showing up was a spanner in the work but I must admit that it did provide a convenient excuse for you to try and marry my only grandson." Grandma's words caused a slight blush on Asuka.

"Marry?! What the hell?!" Mana took strong objection to what Grandma suggested and shoved Asuka. Luckily Gohei was quick to stop both girls both anything more could happen.

"Hey Granny! I've been good! Did you bring me back a present?" Misato peaked up beside her.

"Of course dear. But first I want to see my only grandson." She then turned back to the three mothers.

"Shit… we're screwed…" Kyoko whispered under her breath as she continued to think up an excuse for Shinji's latest physical changes not to mention all the other so called accidents the poor boy has had to go through.

"Leave everything to me," Naoko whispered back and then stood up to approach grandma.

"She's got guts… What do think Yui? If we make a break for the door, can we make it?" Kyoko asked her other partner in crime and then noticed an intense stare from the other woman.

"You have something to say Naoko-chan?" Gohei inquired.

"Yes I do… Ahem!" the courageous mother cleared her throat.

"IT WAS ALL THEIR IDEA! THEY MADE ME DO IT!" She pointed an accusing finger at Kyoko and Yui in an attempt to clear her name from any blame.

"BITCH/ TRAITOR!" both women shouted back at her.

"Ah! You see they always pick on me," Naoko pretended to be scared and hid behind Gohei. To add insult to injury Naoko began pulling faces at the pair while using Gohei as a shield. It was the last straw for Kyoko and Yui as the both of them leapt up trying to kill their friend.

"I must apologise for their behaviour. These girls never learn," Grandma said to Hikari and Kodama as she easily kept the trio apart from causing grievous bodily harm. "It must be hard for the class representative to sit by and see all this happen and try not to help."

"Ah! Thank God!" A boy's voice breathed a sigh of relief as it caused the entire ruckus to stop. While Kyoko and Yui tried to attack Naoko they had inadvertently allow Shinji to get free and with the shampoo and soap blinding his sight, he wondered around aimlessly trying to feel his always around.

"Shinji?" Gohei called out to him while trying to register that a half metre naked male human was who she thought it was.

"Huh? That voice? Grandma?" Shinji ask as he spun around to try and get a position where the familiar voice came from but as he did was slip and fall onto his backside.

Gohei bent over and pickup little Shinji and held him eye level with her. At the same time Shinji had wiped the annoying liquid from his eyes and allowed him to see a little.

"My grandchild! What happen? Who did this to you?" realisation had set in and over whelming concern flooded Gohei but Shinji was more concern with hiding his nudity with his hand moving from his eyes to his groin region.

"After I broke my leg, everyone tried to help and…" he started explaining but was interrupted.

"Everyone tried to help did they?" She asked with an growing eye brow twitch getting worse and worse still.

"If everyone wanted you help you then why are they all trying to sneak away?" Gohei asked as she sensed everyone was carefully tip-toeing away trying to escape.

"Well… they did try to do their best and they had good intensions," Shinji faked a laugh trying to ease his grandmother's growing rage.

"Rei honey, take your brother home. I have a little business to take care of here." The oldest Ikari carefully handed Shinji over to his sister like he was a new born and she wrapped him up in her school jumper.

"You new appearance is very endearing, brother." She told him as she cradled him.

"Don't you start…" Shinji deadpan to his sister.

"Don't worry dear grandson. Grandmother will take care of everything." She reassured him as the woman proceeded to grab whoever was closest and give them the beating of a life time.

THE NEXT MORNING – SOHRYU HOUSEHOLD

"God… Do you think we lost her?" Kyoko asked between deep breathes. She had one hand on the wall of her house to prop herself up. A whole night of running from Grandma Gohei Ikari left her with little strength.

"I fired all my tranquiller darts… The thing just kept on coming." Naoko said and then exhaustedly slumped to the ground with her hunting rifle over one shoulder. Naoko knew that some of her darts were on target but they did nothing to slow down the rampaging grandmother determined to exact some punishment.

"I've never seen anything like that," Kodama huffed before falling face first into the ground. "She went through straight through buildings. I thought we were going to die when that parking lot collapsed."

The group were chased all over the city, leaving a path of destruction in their wake. The streets and buildings of Tokyo Three became a giant maze for the cat and mouse chase. In the end there wasn't much of a maze left. They had all seen Godzilla movies and Gohei was hundred times worst. Yui's rampages didn't even measure up to her mother's.

"What about those power lines? She was lit up like a Christmas tree but still came after us," Mana recounted the time when everyone ran into a power substation. It had honestly seemed like a good idea at the time. After all who would plough through a field mine field of high voltage equipment. Gohei ignored the warning signs on the fence.

"Stay on your guard everyone!" Yui told everyone. Out of the whole group she was the only one to not show signs tiredness or fatigue. "She may still be around."

"Why are we doing this?!" a confused Hikari spoke up. "Isn't she your mother?"

"You girls don't know Gohei Ikari," Kyoko told her. "There is no reasoning with her when she gets like this."

"Pfft! She thinks she's so tough because she's …" Naoko spat in disgust but was cut off.

"Shhh! You know what happens if people find out about her." It was Kyoko that quickly stopped her friend from revealing the truth.

"What happens? What is she?" Mana was curiosity ever since they she had met the older Ikari in the NERV showers. It nagged her that this woman knew about her feelings for Shinji.

"Not this story again…" Ritsuko shook her head as she had rumours about grandma Ikari many times before. As the only sensible person in the group she didn't believe any of the stories.

"There you all are!"

Everyone looked up to where the voice came from and found grandma Ikari leaning out a on a window sill. She was wearing a cooking apron over her kimono and showed no signs of the night's pursuit. A bright smile was on her face instead of the snarling fangs that threaten to devour them all last night. Everyone jumped behind Yui as a shield.

"You girls must be tired from running all night. I'm really sorry you all got caught up in that. Why don't you come in and have something to eat, breakfast is ready. I'll explain everything inside," she said to the school girls.

"No don't! It's a trap!" Yui tried to warn everybody but it was too late.

"Wow… I only just realised how hungry I was after Granny reminded me," Naoko said as she entered the house with the rest of the gang following. The night's chase all but forgotten from everyone's minds.

"Stop pouting Yui. You are a grown woman and a mother you should like more like it." Gohei told her daughter.

"NOW YOU LISTEN HERE!" Yui fired back but just had the window closed in her face which just infuriated her even more. Realising that stewing in her own anger wasn't going to help her get rid of her own mother, she stomped into the house along with everyone.

"Wow Gran! Are these your famous steamed pork buns?" Misato asked as she juggled one of the fresh hot buns between her hands.

"Of course. You all have as much as you like. God knows how you all have been surviving without a decent meal," Gohei replied while placing more into the steamer. Her comment was an indirect slur towards her daughter and caused an already throbbing vein on Yui's forehead to grow more.

"You girls eat up as well." She then placed a full tray of buns on the table for the school girls. "All that exercise last night must have taken a toll. If you want to develop health bodies for my Shinji then you have to eat up."

"My… Shinji…" Yui's knuckles began to crack as she was having major issues controlling her temper at this moment.

Hikari was hesitant to accept the generous offer unlike her sister and friends. Gohei was quick to pick on this.

"There's no need to be cautious Ms. Class Representative. It's not like I would poison any of you." She then cast an evil glint over to Kyoko and Naoko which prompted the two to begin throwing up what they had eaten in the nearest waste basket.

"How… How?" Hikari stammered nervously.

"How did I know that you were the Class Representative? I know a lot of things. What sort of grandmother would I be if I didn't know what was going on in my family's life?" She replied casually taking a seat at the table to girls with a cup of tea.

"That reminds me. Shinji is resting in your bed Asuka. My poor grandson was exhausted after everything he had been through." She shot some more daggers at Yui and the other mothers. Yui replied in kind with her own death stare, "I figured that you two have slept in the same bed before so you wouldn't mind."

Gohei's words stopped the girls from eating and caused Asuka to begin choking on her piece of pork bun.

"Asuka! How could you?!" the highly moral Hikari was first to voice her opinion.

"It's not what you think?!" the young redhead tried to explain over the grinding teeth and popping knuckles of Mana and Kodama.

"Don't worry. Asuka is too scared do anything with Shinji," Misato spoke up with a mouth full of pork bun.

"It's a lot further then you have got with him!" Asuka attacked back and slammed her fist into the table which was the start of another Asuka and Misato shouting match.

"Come on you two!" Yui grabbed her two best friends by the back of their shirts and reefed their head out of the bin, "Let's go check on Shinji."

"The antidote! Give me the antidote!" Naoko shouted and kicked around as she was being dragged around by Yui. She was still worried that Gohei had deliberately poisoned her.

"It's good to be back in a house full of life again," Grandma Ikari said to herself smiling behind her cup of tea.

The three mothers reached Asuka's bedroom and the door was closed. Instead of knocking and entering Yui began feeling around the frame of the door.

"What are you doing?" Kyoko asked. The possibility of having ingested poison all but forgotten.

"She may have placed some traps for us. That's what I would have done." Yui explained her actions. Her two accomplishes looked at each other and then took three steps back away from the door.

"I think… ah… I need to use the bathroom." Kyoko made up some flimsy excuse to get away. She knew that Gohei's traps where much worst then anything that Yui could ever conceive.

"Yeah I need to go wee-wee as well." Naoko second the motion but before they can get away Yui dragged them back almost breaking their wrists.

"It's clear. Stop being such chickens!" Yui scolded them and opened the door. The room was quiet and just like Gohei told them the still chibi-fied Shinji laid resting peacefully in the middle of Asuka's bed. It was a single bed and he looked so small and helpless lying on it.

"Awww… He looks so cute." Naoko squealed as she went to pick up Shinji but her hands was slapped away by Yui.

"He's my son. I'm holding him!" she told Naoko. Her words left no room for any negotiations.

Yui carefully lifted Shinji so not to wake him. She cradled him like he was a new born again. His presence in her arms gave her an warmth within her which she hadn't felt in a long time. He stirred a little and then instinctively nestle closer into her chest.

"Are you crying?" Naoko asked Yui who didn't answer but just continued to star down at Shinji.

"Ah… Yui…" Kyoko began speaking.

"Why can't they just stay like this, Naoko?" Yui asked rhetorically as she sniffed away a few tears.

"I hate to ruin this moment but…" Kyoko interrupted again.

"I'm holding him next! You just wait your turn!" Naoko snapped at her friend while she played with Shinji's tiny hand.

"Fine! Don't say I didn't try to warn you!" The shouting caused Shinji to wake. He rubbed his eyes and it took him a while to focus. It also took him a moment to realise where he was and being in close proximity to his mother's chest area freaked him out.

"WHAT THE HELL!!!" He exclaimed and began fighting to get away.

"Shhh… It's alright Shinji." Yui tried to calm him down. He stopped when he saw something coming down from the ceiling. Suddenly Yui and Naoko felt something wrap around their throats and then hoist then up into the air. The thin wire instantly interrupted the air supply and was cutting into their skin. Yui unintentionally dropped Shinji as she struggled against the strangulation.

Kyoko realised that in Shinji's current state the fall from would be harmful to him. She dove forward and used her bosom as a crash mat for the chibi-fied boy.

"Thanks Kyoko-san," Shinji smiled his rescuer.

"No. Thank you Shinji." She winked playfully at him which caused him to realise what he was holding. He quickly went leap off the women's chest but was held down by two arms wrapping around him.

"I thought you said everything was clear!" Naoko coughed and splattered as she struggled around in mid air. While almost blacking out from asphyxiation she still managed to deliver a swift kick to Yui's backside.

"Release my brother." The muzzle of a shotgun was placed against the temple of Kyoko Sohryu. Shinji turned to his side to find Rei was on the other end of the loaded weapon. She held the firearm in one arm and in the other were the wires strangling Naoko and Yui.

"Rei! It's alright! You don't have to do this." Shinji waved his arms around trying to convince his sister that her extreme methods were not necessary. She meant well but was just a little drastic.

"Fear not brother. No harm shall come to you." She said with unwavering determination and resolve, "No matter what the threat, I will protect you. Even if that threat is mother."

"Do something! She's your daughter!" Naoko exclaimed and kicked Yui in the ass again.

"Stop kicking me fatty!" Yui stopped trying to free herself and replied in kind with a strong boot of her own.

"Did you just call me fatty?!" That was the start of a kicking war. Both combatants didn't care that their heads were about to pop right off their neck as long as they won this fight.

"Don't worry Shinji." Another pair of arms came down pick him up from the waist, "Rei is just being a big sister looking her little brother."

"What the?! Gran? You have to do something!" Shinji pleaded to Gohei to stop the violence.

"First things first: we have to get you breakfast and may be you can explain to me what has really been happening while I was away." Grandma Ikari began walking away with chibi Shinji in her arms.

"I'll leave the rest to you Rei-chan. I'll save a few of my special pork buns for you." The oldest female Ikari informed the youngest female Ikari.

"You made your pork buns?!" Shinji asked all excited and completely forgetting about everything happening in Asuka's bedroom. Grandmother and grandson walked away to the pleas of the three women.

"Your crimes will not go unpunished," Rei hissed as she closed the door to the bedroom.

"What's going on up there?" Asuka took a break from shouting at Misato to check what all the commotion was coming from upstairs. She had meet Gohei and Shinji half way down the stairs. Suddenly there was a muffled explosion immediately followed by a plume of black smoke coming from Asuka's room.

"I guess I really should see what happen." Gohei sighed and handled over Shinji to Asuka who was not expecting him and for a moment juggled him in her arms, "Take him downstairs I'll be back down in a moment."

"You look terrible. Did you stay up all might?" Shinji asked Asuka as he noticed her dishevel and tired appearance.

"Geez Baka, do you say that to all the girls you greet in the morning?" Asuka huffed. Shinji was right though – she didn't have the strength and couldn't be bothered arguing with him at the moment.

They reached the main dinning table where the rest of the girls where. It was unusually quiet as everyone had fallen asleep from exhaustion of last night's chase. Even a second explosion from above didn't stir them from their deep slumber. Asuka plonked herself back in her seat with Shinji in her lap.

"Here. Eat." She grabbed the nearest pork bun and jammed it into his mouth.

"Hey watch it!" Shinji told her but then realised that she had also fallen sleep as soon as she had sat down.

"Sleep well Asuka," he said as he gave her hand a reassuring squeeze. Even in her current state, Asuka's sleeping face still reminded him of an angel. Content with his pork bun, Shinji began to eat in silence with the occasion rumble coming from upstairs.

LATER THAT DAY

"Rei honey could you dry while I wash?" Gohei asked her grand daughter as she began to clean up after finishing cooking her speciality. Everyone was still fast asleep from the morning. Everyone was so tired that Shinji, Rei and Gohei could go about normally without having to tip toe.

"I just have one more body." Rei answered as she dropped Naoko's unconscious body from her shoulder onto the ground on top of Yui.

"Rei you didn't?!" Shinji asked from top of the dinning table.

"They are merely unconscious. They should have no long term physical injuries." Rei informed her brother as she went to retrieve the last body.

"Oh that's good… wait! Long term physical injuries?!" he exclaimed.

"Don't worry dear," Grandma reassured Shinji, "My girls may be a little thick but they're not that weak."

"Okay… If you say so." Figuring that he couldn't do much in his chibi-fied condition his attention went back to the chrome kettle on the dinning table to continue looking at him self. He still had difficulty believing what had happen to him.

"If you are worried about being shrunk, I have my people working on a solution." Gohei told him all the while continuing to wash the dishes, "It's their only priority. All their other projects like the stem cell research and human cloning are put on hold until we fix you right up."

"Human cloning?" he asked.

"Opps, I guess I said a little too much," she giggled in an attempt to convince her grandson that she was being silly.

"Hey Gran, what is that you do?" Shinji asked another question, "Mum never really talks about you or grandpa. And I was just wondering…" He was interrupted by her mobile phone ringing.

"Sorry dear. I have to take this." She grabbed the phone and held between her shoulder and ear while still continuing to her chore.

"Yes what is it?" she answered but in a different voice. It wasn't the loving grandmother voice she would address Shinji or Rei with but a more formal almost in a dictator-like fashion.

"Now you listen! It took three weeks to broker that peace agreement. If he doesn't accept those refugees, I'm talking sanctions, blockages, the whole works. I'll seize all his assets, military forces and bomb his country back into the Dark Ages. If that doesn't work then we can use his daughter as leverage," she barked into her phone.

"Bio and nuclear threat? Are you sure he said that? I see. Then make it look like an accident but first make examples of his wife and daughter. I want him to suffer." She continued as Shinji looked on in amazement as he didn't know if he had to be shocked or afraid.

"I don't care if the church won't like it. We have those photos of his Holiness that we can use if required. How is the research into those samples I sent last night?"

"I told you it was my grandson. Tell them that they have twenty four hours to have a vaccine. For every hour had passes twenty four it will be a family member of the research team," she finished abruptly and hung up her phone.

"I'm sorry Shinji dear, you were saying something?" Gohei reverted back to her normal loving and caring voice. Shinji immediately try to hide behind the kettle.

"Oh! Does my grandson want to play hide and seek!" Gohei began to playfully stalk towards Shinji.

'Christ! It's no wonder they are all scared of her!' he thought as he wrapped himself in a little ball.

DING DONG

"Rei would you see who that was? I'm just playing with Shinji." Gohei requested as she grabbed Shinji and began tickling him. The poor lad couldn't help but laugh aloud. Rei dumped Kyoko body onto the pile and went to see who was at the door.

"I never knew you were so ticklish." Gohei laughed with Shinji as he squirmed under her fingers. The laughter stopped when Gohei stopped.

"Do you what to know what I do and who I am?" She asked Shinji.

"Well… Ah…" Shinji didn't know how to respond.

"That's easy Shinji! I'm your grandmother." She told him with a wink and then pulled him into a big hug.

"Excuse me brother." Rei had returned from answering the door and held out an envelope addressed to him, "It was your friends. They were told by the principle to give you this letter. I told them that you were resting. I assumed that you wish not to see them in your current physical condition."

"Yeah, thanks Rei." Shinji was let down onto the table and he began opening the letter. He started reading it when and then dropped to his knees.

"Shinji?! What is it/ Brother?!" Rei and Gohei asked him full of concern.

"I… I… I…" he stammered as they both waited for him to finish.

"I've been expelled from school." He said dropping the letter.

END OF CHAPTER

AUTHOR'S NOTES
Another long-ish chapter (it would just over 8000 words) but introducing the mystery person that tag team Rei and Pen-pen were working was a bit of fun. BTW, Gohei Ikari isn't really Shinji's grandmother's name. As far as I know, grand parents never got mention in the anime or the manga series. The idea for a grandmother really came about from Yui and the other mothers getting their own way all the time. I thought what could be the scarier then Yui, Kyoko and Naoko combined and the only logical answer was the monster that spawned and raised them.

Next on the agenda, would be the chibi-fied Shinji idea. I'm sure that get some flames about that idea. All I can say that it seem good at the time. Plus it isn't supposed to be taken seriously.

But on some serious note, I've decided on ending and plan to have this thing finished before chapter 24. Kinda like one season of a real series. I guess that means you guys don't have to put up with my ramblings much longer :P

Thanks to Lord Raa and Wicker Man and thanks for reading, Wonga316