Guys, we reached 200 reviews. Gah! I love you all so much. Too much.

That being said, I'm very sad to make an announcement – this is the penultimate tale. For those that don't know what that means, it means that after this tale is done, there will be one more and then we're done! I know some people made requests that may not be fulfilled, so I offer you this in compensation – write your own! What's stopping you? Go ahead! And then message me, 'cause I'll read 'em for sure!

(ps, all of you need to get off your behinds and get to a theatre to see Wreck-it Ralph. Like, NOW.)

Tonight, it seemed, Hugo was absolutely determined not to start crying.

"Crying is not what real men do!" He declared stoutly, crossing his arms. "And I wasn't crying last time, no matter what she says!"

He pointed to Mary Jane, who shrugged. "He was crying."

"Was not!"

Mira sighed at both of them. "All right. How about if I promise a very happy and funny story?"

Fern jumped to her feet. "Hey Mama, does this one only have to be about two people?"

"Yeah, I want a story with lots of couples!"

Mira flipped open the book of fairy tales, running her hands along the paper. She had a certain fairy tale in mind for the night, but at the same time she was having trouble deciding who the two main characters sounded like.

Fern saw her mother's confusion, and padded over to her. Poking Mira in the side of the leg, she said, "Just make it your own, Mama. You're good at that."

In surprise, Mira looked at her youngest daughter. A smile grew on her face. "Of course, darling. You were always so much smarter than me."

Flipping open the book, Mirajane took a deep breath. She knew nothing of these people, but instead would have to go on the stories told to her. She only hoped she could do everyone justice.

"Now then. Shall we start?"

SNOW WHITE AND THE SEVEN DWARVES

Once upon a time, in a kingdom very, very far away, there lived a mother who loved her daughter very much. This woman was a queen, Layla Ashley, and she was the most kind and beautiful queen anybody could ever have asked for.

When she was pregnant, Layla took to embroidering for her amusement. One time, when she was heavily pregnant, Layla pricked her finger and let a drop of blood fall onto the pristine white handkerchief. Gasping in surprise, Layla pressed the bleeding finger to her lips.

The dress Layla had been wearing was black, for her husband had just passed, and she was in mourning. As she saw the white handkerchief with the red blood against the black dress, Layla was struck by a sudden idea.

"I wish..." she said quietly. "I wish for my daughter to be born with skin white as snow, hair black as ebony, and lips red as blood."

Layla's wish came true, for when the baby was born, she had white skin and black hair, and small red lips. Layla named the baby girl Lucy, and nicknamed her Snow White. But the happiness could not last for long, and Layla, still weak from childbirth, fell victim to the same sickness as her husband and passed away.

As the late king or queen had no living relatives, the kingdom fell to the power of a duke named Faust. This duke had a son named Jellal. Now, Faust was only the regent, as he could only rule until the baby Princess Lucy came of age. So Faust decided that, before that time came, he would have his son Jellal marry Princess Lucy so that he could stay on the throne.

This plan seemed, for a while, like it would work. The young Jellal and Lucy got on quite well, and Faust could tell he would have no problems telling Jellal he would have to marry the princess someday.

But Princess Lucy, he felt, would be an entirely different story.

Because you see, Princess Lucy had not stayed as the small Snow White baby. She grew up to be a tomboy, and a roughhouser, and not at all what a princess should be like. Her dark hair was bleached blonde from her countless hours on the sun, and her white skin tanned quickly. She had calluses on her palms and blisters on her feet, and had elbows and knees perpetually plastered in bandages. She was a no-nonsense girl, and Faust knew that she was never going to marry anyone just because he told her to.

Faust also had another downfall. He was a great narcissist, and somewhat of a magician. He had an enchanted mirror that would tell him every day that he was the handsomest and strongest man in the kingdom.

The day everyone's adventure began started off as just another day. It was two months until Princess Lucy's eighteenth birthday, and so Faust had two months to get Lucy and Jellal married. He had told the two of his plans, and although Lucy had protested profusely – "he's like my brother!" - Jellal had agreed quietly and Faust was confident he could get Lucy to do as he asked.

So today, like any other day, Faust approached his mirror. "Mirror, mirror, on the wall," he asked as always. "Who is the strongest of them all?"

The surface of the mirror shimmered. Faust settled back in his chair, waiting for the answer that came to him every day: "You, my lord."

But it was not to be, for today there was another answer. "It is another, my lord."

Faust stood from his chair so fast it fell over with a great clatter. Glaring at his mirror, he roared, "Who? Who is fairer and stronger than I?"

The surface of the mirror shimmered again, and Faust was faced with a vision. In the sunny garden, he saw his son, on the ground and in a headlock.

"It is the Princess Lucy, my lord," the mirror answered.

Faust's grip on his wineglass tightened, until the glass shattered in his palm.

xxx

"Ouch! Lucy, let me go!"

Jellal groaned from where he was currently in a complete headlock from Princess Lucy. The prince turned his head to the side, cracking his neck as he did so. "What do you want?"

"Say you won't marry me."

He huffed, scratching at her hand in a plea for escape. "That's not my decision! It's my dad's!"

Lucy tightened her grip. "Yeah, but you can say no!"

"No, I can't!" He choked out. "I can't just – ack! Uncle!"

Sighing, Lucy released him. "You're such a wimp."

"And you're a strong freak," Jellal shot back, massaging his throat. "Why are you so mean for a girl?"

Lucy kicked him, and he fell over. There came a throat clearing, and both teens looked up to see a castle guard. "The King requests and audience with the Princess Lucy," he announced. Lucy stood with a huff, brushing out her skirts and glaring back at Jellal fiercely.

"You and me aren't done, mister," she snarled, before stomping off in the direction of the throne room with steam pouring out her ears.

Faust was slouching on his throne when Lucy entered, stomping in her riding boots. "What did you call me for, Your Majesty?" She asked with no politeness in her tone. Faust raised an eyebrow at her.

"I believe," he began, in a voice that sounded like sandpaper on confetti. "That you have once again refused my request to comply to marriage with Prince Jellal."

"Yes, that I have," she answered instantly. "And I plan on continuing to do so until I get my way."

Faust sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose. "Princess, I try to reason with you, really, I do. Can we not just compromise?"

"No," Lucy bit back. "Like hell! Even if I did want to marry Jellal – which, by the way, I don't – I wouldn't marry him just because you told me to!" She crossed her arms, glaring stoutly. "When I marry, believe me when I say it will be for love." She narrowed her eyes. "And I will get back my mother's kingdom."

Faust growled, gripping the arm of his throne. Lucy scoffed, spinning on her heel and stomping right back out the door.

With an angry yell, Faust tossed his goblet, causing it to clang horrendously on the floor. "Curse that brat!" he spat. "What am I to do with her? If my mirror is correct – and it always is – she will be strong enough to defeat me!"

One of his attendants stepped forward, bowing low. "Your Majesty, if I may make a suggestion?"

He glanced sideways. "What is it, Byro?"

The man bowed his head of salt-white hair. "Perhaps, since the princess is not yet strong enough to defeat you yet...if she were to simply disappear?"

"Byro, what are you suggesting?" Faust cut in, annoyed with the man's manner of speech. Byro cleared his throat.

"My lord, of you were to have the princess assassinated, she would no longer serve a threat to you or this kingdom."

Faust raised his eyebrows. "Byro, do you really believe me to be capable of such evil?"

Byro's face was calm as he answered. "I know you are."

Settling back into his throne, Faust smirked. "Do you have anyone in mind? This cannot be tied to me, if we are to pull it off."

"I have someone in mind," Byro nodded. "He is a huntsman under my charge, and is the fastest carriage-driver in the kingdom. He will do anything I ask of him."

"And what is this huntsman's name?"

Byro smirked as he answered. "Natsu Dragion."

xxx

Lucy sat in the back of the carriage, arms crossed tightly and legs folded under her. She wasn't being very ladylike, but as she played with the small skull pin in her hair, she really didn't much care. "How much further are we?" She called out to the carriage driver, who was driving her crazy with his 'cool' attitude.

"Just a bit further, Your Highness," the carriage driver called back to her. Admittedly, he was good at what he did. The horses were pulling the carriage quickly and efficiently, and Lucy had yet to feel a single bump in the road. "I promised to have you there by lunchtime, no?"

Huffing, she settled back into the seat. When Faust had offered her a free vacation by the lake – "Time to collect her thoughts," he called it – Lucy had of course accepted. Even though she had absolutely no intentions of giving his proposal any thoughts, she was loathe to give up a free vacation. The lake was an expensive place, even for a princess.

The carriage ground to a halt, and Lucy stuck her head out the window. She frowned upon realizing they were nowhere near the lake. In fact, if her bearings were right, they seemed to be on the edge of the Dark Forest.

"Hey..."

She kicked open the doors, swinging around to face the carriage driver with a frown. "Excuse me, but why have we stopped-"

She stopped her sentience short when she saw the loaded crossbow cocked at her. "Hey!" Lucy yelped shrilly. "What – what the hell do you think you are doing?"

The carriage driver was slouched in his seat, half covered in shadow. The crossbow rested on his knee, and one finger sat lightly on the trigger. Lucy would be completely lying if she said she didn't find the sight ridiculously sexy, but at the moment she was more preoccupied. Namely, by the sexy man pointing a crossbow at her.

"Lucy Ashley," he said in a deep, scratchy voice. "I've been assigned to assassinate you."

"Assassinate?" Lucy cried, completely astounded. "By who?"

"That's my business alone," he replied. He moved to shoot, and Lucy, who was quite fed up by the situation, decided she wanted some more answers before her head was blown off. Angrily, she stomped towards the man and grabbed his ear, yanking him off the driver's seat.

"All right, you," she snarled. "Enough with the mystery! Who sent you and why do they want me-"

But Lucy stopped in her sentence to stare at the man. Because the second she'd pulled him off the seat, his personality had done a complete one-eighty. Imagine Lucy's surprise when he threw up his hands in defense and started screaming like a little girl.

xxx

Confession time: Natsu Dragion was a chicken.

He wouldn't go so far as to call himself a coward. No, that was a little to mean, even for him. But a chicken? Oh, that was absolutely what he was. He was, in fact, such a chicken that the only reason he'd even agreed to assassinate the princess in the first place was because the King and Byro had scared him into doing it.

He'd thought he'd be okay, if he just stuck to the driver's seat. Natsu gained the confidence of ten men in the driver's seat. He wasn't actually sure why, it just made him feel better. So from the seat of the plush golden carriage he'd pointed the crossbow at the admittedly pretty princess and nearly succeeded.

But, alas, Natsu's courage was whisked away from him as well as his manliness as he was dragged through the forest by his ear.

"Ow! Ow ow ow owowowowow please let me go!"

Natsu whimpered loudly as Lucy stomped through the underbrush, whacking away tree branches with her bare hands. "Yeah, right!" She snarled back at him. "Like I'd ever let you go, you just tried to kill me!" She twisted his ear painfully and he gave a little shriek.

"I was only following the King's orders!"

She rounded on him, eyes wide as saucers. "What, Faust? He tried to have me killed?"

"Yeah," Natsu said breathlessly, very glad she was no longer pinching as hard. "He wants you out of the way so that he can rule the kingdom alone."

"That bastard!" Lucy gasped, outraged. She had let go of Natsu, and he started to inch away, but her hand shot out and grabbed his collar. "You aren't going anywhere, bub," she growled. "If I let you go you'll tell Faust I'm still alive. He has to think you've succeeded and that we're both dead."

"Um, it might not be that easy," Natsu squeaked out. "The King wanted proof that you were dead. He..."

Lucy pulled his face close to hers. "Continue?"

"...he wanted me to cut out your heart and bring it to him."

Lucy was so disgusted that she screamed and let go of Natsu, wrapping her arms around herself. "And you were actually going to do it, you sicko!?"

"No!" Natsu threw up his arms in defense. "No, I was gonna...I don't know...well I was just gonna wing it!" he argued.

"You couldn't have just refused his request?!"

"It wasn't a request so much as a death threat," Natsu argued feebly and sullenly. "If I didn't do it he'd have killed me right on the spot."

For a moment, Lucy's eyes softened. But it only lasted for a second, as she straightened and her gaze turned back to stone. "So you'd value your own life over that of an innocent and beautiful princess?"

"Wha-no! That isn't - I mean - that is totally unfair!"

"Yeah, whatever. Come on, heart-stealer, we're going this way."

Yes, it appeared Natsu Dragion was a complete and utter chicken.

xxx

"What do you mean, she's gone?"

Jellal faced his father, eyes wide. His shaking hand grasped the edge of his desk, as the King stood menacingly in the doorway.

"It is as I said," Faust continued coldly. "She was on her way to the lake for a vacation and disappeared on the edge of the Dark Forest . It is most likely she is dead; however we know for certain she is gone and will never return."

"But..." Jellal whispered. His thoughts were racing. Lucy, gone? But why? "Is this because she didn't want to marry me?"

He wasn't looking at his father, so he missed the way the King's eyes flashed dangerously. "Perhaps," was all he said. "I will leave you to your mourning."

Jellal sank to his knees, head in his hands. It was all his fault Lucy had left. She might be dead now, and it was all his fault!

He had not loved Lucy like two people getting married should have. He only agreed to marry her because it was his father's wish. To him, Lucy was like that tough older sister he'd always wished for. She beat up the people who were mean to him, she brushed the dirt off his shoulder when he fell. He did love Lucy, like a sister and a best friend.

And so Jellal decided he could not just give up hope on the princess. If it was his fault she was gone, then he was going to be the one to bring her back.

And for that, he would need a guide.

Jellal surveyed the rowdy, dirty bar, scarf pulled up to hide his face. He didn't want to men in here to know he was the prince, he was afraid they might pummel him to bits. Jellal was strong, but the people's dislike for the King was stronger and he had no doubts they would take that anger out against him.

The only reason Jellal was here was because he needed one of these strong, scary men to help him track Lucy through the Dark Forest. He needed a huntsman; not a posh royal type but a true man who could fight his way through anything.

"Oi! Did you hear? The monster's coming again tonight?"

There was a collective groan from the men as the bartender called across the floor. "Oh, no! We're gonna lose all our money – again!" One, a large man with an axe strapped to his back, complained loudly.

"Yeah, that cheater always snatches our money away!"

Someone threw a bottle at their heads. "Hey! That 'cheater' always beats you two fair and square! You're just sore losers!"

Jellal raised his eyebrows in interest. There was a man who could easily defeat these two? This man, then, was surely the guide he was looking for.

"I am not a sore loser! There is no way that I could have been defeated by a-"

"A girl?"

Jellal's head, and every other head in the bar swivelled to the back entrance, where a hunched figure was leaning against the doorframe, twirling a set of keys around her finger.

"Knightwalker!" The bartender growled. "Would it kill you to use the front door for once?"

"Perhaps," the woman said mystically. "I've never tried it before."

The woman, Knightwalker, was one of the most incredible and powerful-looking women Jellal had ever seen in his life. And he grew up with Lucy Ashley.

Her hair was as red as fire, or blood, wavy and cascading down her shoulders and just barely held in place by a cord. Her clothes were dark, like the night, but skimpy, barely covering her pale skin. When she moved, it was like snakes through the grass. She was dangerous and beautiful.

Jellal gave an audible gulp.

"Wanna give it another go, boys?" Knightwalker asked, hefting a large staff over her shoulder. "Or do you still think you can beat me?"

With an angry roar, half the men in the bar charged.

It only took Knightwalker eight minutes – Jellal timed it – to send every drunken angry man on his back. She broke a few tables in the process, by the time it was over, she was setting them up unsteadily whilst collecting money.

"Stop coming to my bar," The bartender grumbled at her. "You're bad for business."

She smirked sideways at him. "You're the only one who hasn't kicked me out. I have to come here."

Her eyes caught sight of Jellal, and she stalked over to him. He tried to maintain his stance, but nearly cowered as she came too close.

"You've been watching me all night," she said sharply. "Why?"

Jellal glanced furtively from side to side. "I have a business proposition," he answered.

She raised an eyebrow. "And what can you offer in turn for my services?" She asked quickly. Jellal quirked a smiled behind his scarf. So she was a warrior and a businesswoman. She'd make a good queen.

"Money," he answered shortly. She took in his haggard appearance.

"You don't look like the kind of man who can pay the kind of money I'm looking for," she told him, making way to leave.

"Follow me outside and I'll make it worth your while," Jellal called. He didn't want to reveal his status in the bar, but to this huntress he felt he would be safe. She looked back at him, giving his disguise a once-over before agreeing.

"Fine. But if you're wasting my time I'll leave you to rot in the sewers."

"Fair enough."

Once outside, Jellal removed his scarf and hat. Knightwalkers's eyebrows raised as she took in his face tattoo.

"So," she said. "The prince of the land wants my help. Whatever for?"

"The princess is gone," Jellal said. Knightwalker turned her head.

"I heard she died."

"She didn't. At least, I don't know for sure, but I have to make sure. If there's a chance she's still alive, I have to get her back."

Knightwalker eyed him critically for a minute. "And I suppose you'll offer whatever sum of money I ask for?"

"Anything you ask. I'd clean out the coffers for her."

Her eyebrows rose further. "Do you truly love this girl so much?"

"No," he said honestly. "It isn't that. It was my fault she left, and if she is dead because of me I will never forgive myself."

The woman's face softened incredibly after she heard that. "You are an honest man," she told him. "You will make a fine king one day." Nodding at his nonplussed expression, she continued. "I will help you catch the princess. I won't ask for a sum until after the mission is complete" She placed a hand on his shoulder. "And if the worst should happen, I will not ask for money."

Then she was off, gesturing him to follow. "Come! The night is young and we have a princess to hunt!"

Jellal hurried to keep pace with her. "What should I call you, Miss Knightwalker?"

"Erza will do nicely."

xxx

Lucy growled as she smacked another branch out of her way. It squealed as it whipped past – or maybe that was just Natsu, she was having a hard time telling.

"This forest is way too scary! Aah!"

The failed huntsman ducked as some unidentified object went sailing over his head. "It's the Dark Forest," Lucy shot back. "What did you expect? Flowers and songbirds?"

The Dark Forest was, certainly, scary to some. The trees moved on their own and had faces and screamed if you got too close. The ground was murky and all manner of unpleasant creatures roamed. It was enough to make any sane person lose their wits.

Lucy Ashley, however, was not a sane person and was therefore completely unaffected by the forests' terrifying-ness. She was dragging Natsu (again) and was determined to find a place of shelter.

"Just a little further!" She compromised, tired of hearing him wailing. "Okay? And then we'll stop!"

"Okay..."

Just as she said it, a house appeared on the horizon. "A-ha!" Lucy crowed, heading towards it. The house seemed to be on the outs of the forest, where it was not so magic-laden and horrendous. In fact, out here she could see the moonlight through the trees.

She knocked on the door, allowing Natsu to collapse at her feet. "Hello?" She called. "Anyone home?"

The door swung open, to reveal a young man in heavy clothes. "Hello?" he asked right back at her, hiding slightly behind the door. "Who are you?"

Lucy held her head high as she answered. "I am Princess Lucy of Edolas!"

"Ah!" He swung the door open. "A princess! How wonderful!" His brow furrowed. "What were you doing in the Dark Forest?"

"Long story," she growled. "Can I come in?"

"Yes, of course." The man stepped back to allow her entrance. "My name is Gray Surge." He saw Natsu still lying on the doormat. "Is he all right?"

Lucy ignored him for favour of taking in the house. It was a one-story, made entirely of wood with winding, rickety stairs leading to a platform where Lucy saw seven beds sitting. There were tables and chairs carved of wood, and what looked like pickaxes on the chairs.

As Gray dragged Natsu in, for apparently the young man had fainted, a beautiful woman with blue hair strode up to Lucy. "Who are you?" She asked in undisguised interest.

"Ah! Juvia-chan!" Gray gushed. "This is Princess Lucy! She needs shelter from the Dark Forest!"

The woman named Juvia sent him a scathing look. "I wasn't asking you."

Gray cowered. "S-sorry, Juvia-chan..."

Another man, this one tall with a hat jammed over his afro and a journal grasped in his hands, sidled over. "Princess Lucy? As in, the daughter of the late King Jude and Queen Layla?"

"Yes, that's me," Lucy answered. The man grinned.

"Excellent! I'll be able to use you as research!" He lifted his journal. "I'm writing an article about the late Royal Family, see..."

"Gajeel is a journalist," Juvia interrupted. "He runs a paper on the corruption on King Faust."

At the mention of the name, Lucy's face darkened. "Faust. That man is the reason I am here."

"Oh? What happened?" A demure-looking woman with chestnut brown hair came out of the kitchen, followed by an equally lovely lady with white hair. "I am Cana, and this is Mirajane, by the way."

"Faust wanted to kill me, so he hired this sap," she pointed to Natsu, who was resting on a table as Gray dabbed his forehead with a cool cloth, "to assassinate me and cut out my heart."

Cana gasped. "So he is a villain?"

"Faust is, but this guy isn't. He's just a coward."

"Chicken..." Natsu groaned, apparently awake. " 'M a chicken. Not a coward."

"Whatever."

Mirajane clutched the arm of a tall, buff man. "Oh, dear," she said, tears forming in her crystal blue eyes. "How terrible, that the king would try and do such a thing!"

"I believe it," Gajeel said darkly.

The man Mirajane was clinging to sighed. "That king does not deserve to be called a man," he stated sadly, tears in his eyes. "My poor sister...everything was his fault."

Mirajane sniffed. "Don't cry, Elfman..."

"I'm not..."

Before Lucy could ask as to what happened to their sister, a loud crash came from upstairs. Doing a quick headcount, Lucy realized that she had only met six of the seven inhabitants of this house. And judging by the angry roar from up the stairs, she guessed that this seventh member would not be too happy to meet her.

"Who's in my house?!" The voice was shouting, and a figure leapt down, completely disregarding the stairs. The person straightened in front of Lucy, pressing her face close and glaring hotly with fiery brown eyes.

"I am Princess Lucy. Who are you?" Lucy shot back, instant dislike coursing through her veins. The figure, smaller in frame that her but with enough attitude in her posture to be taller than ten men, crossed her arms and blew a lock of blue hair out of her face.

"I am Levy McGarden, head of this house and leader of our band of outlaws," she answered. "And you, princess, are not welcome here."

"Band of outlaws?" Lucy was astounded. "Wha-who are you people?"

Levy snarled at her. "Your ignorance pisses me off," she declared. "How dare you have no idea who we are? We are the only rebels left against the phony King!

"We are the Seven Dwarves!"

XxXxX

Edo-Levy = Grumpy.

I love the Edolas versions of everyone, so of course I had to write a story with them. Expect lots of Edo-Levy and Gajeel, because they are ridiculously adorable and you kind of have to guess at their relationship. Yay! And next chapter, lots and lots of fluffy Edo-NaLu! Double yay!

~CCS