AN: I did intend to publish this sooner, but I got so caught up in it that I just couldn't seemed to get it finished. I also had a bit of trouble with this one, trying to make it seem as realistic as possible. Oh how my cheeks did blush!
As she walked down the hospital corridor, pumps squeaking loudly against the marble, Lisa twitched with a sense of paranoia, hearing the array of mutters that followed her like a game of Chinese whispers, invading and hushed.
She couldn't determine whether they were real, or simply figments of her wild imagination. It was a repercussion of the drug, making it difficult to ascertain what was there and what was not. Swallowing the lump in her throat, she took a deep breath.
Holding a small envelope in her hand, she gnawed on her low her lip as she approached the director's office, nails scraping neurotically against the paper. She had seen Kaufman leave whilst signing in, taking the opportunity to slip her covert note beneath his door.
Nervous, she swiftly examined her surroundings before surreptitiously sliding the paper underneath the fading wood, heart thumping in her chest as she continued on, pretending as though she hadn't just left a desperate plea for the man to discover.
All morning her mind was swarmed with thoughts of the drug, taunting her as she tried to remain focused on the task at hand. Patients and staff alike had to constantly snap her from whatever stupor she had fallen into, concentration lapsing more frequently than usual.
Twisting her earring, the nurse spent most of the day hiding inside a bathroom stall, knees tucked up as she curled into a ball atop the seat, hugging both legs close. Tremors shook the teen to her core, mild convulsions which made her job difficult to perform.
Entire body swathed in beads of cold sweat, the teen found it almost impossible to move, wanting nothing more than to lie down on the floor and remain there until the hollow feeling resided, awaiting the moment that she could fill the lingering space that seemed to grow with every passing second.
Voices chased her like a vengeful spirit, brushing the tips of her ears in such a way that she wasn't even certain if she had heard anything at all. She couldn't work without the drug, struggling to keep her composure against the tedious weight of her urges.
As night fell, and her shift came to an end, the intern slumped against her locker, verging on tears as that familiar ache returned to her fatigue laden body. Running a hand through her bob, she slowly opened the door to her locker, cold steel sending a chill down her spine.
That's when a scrap of paper fell out, landing gracefully at her feet. She was initially alarmed, scooping to retrieve the curious item with a hint of caution. Turning it over in her hand, she lifted the flap and examined the note, recognizing the handwriting as that of doctor Kaufman.
Suddenly excited, she began to eagerly read the small yet fluent passage he had scrawled, pondering when the man had snuck in and left the message for her to find. She was amused at how silly it was, like two star crossed lovers sending sweet nothings to one another.
Though only brief, the director was asking the girl to meet with him later that night. In exchange for doing so, he would hand her another dose of PTV, as she had requested. Stomach churning, Lisa sat down on the solid bench behind her, pulse hammering as she took in to consideration what the man had asked of her.
Why hadn't he simply called her into his office?
Moaning, she let herself slouch against the wall, gazing at the directions he had left for her to follow. Closing her eyes, she mentally traced the steps as as she tried to remember how to reach Haerbay Inn, located near Annie's Bar and the Indian Runner.
Though Haerbay was it's official name, most of the locals referred to it as Norman's Motel, after the proprietor, Norman Young. She had never seen any reason to visit such a location, barely offering the structure a passing glance as she strolled through town.
It certainly wasn't the sort of place Lisa would have expected to find the well-dressed man, rousing slight suspicion as she pondered what it was, exactly, that the director wanted. It left her rather nervous, though not without a slight twinge of curiosity.
The word motel carried all kinds of connotations, most of them unpleasant. When the teen thought about it, she considered them to be places where people liasoned for sex, filing into empty rooms and leaving separately during the early hours.
No, a man of his status and wealth would most certainly not be found living in such shoddy conditions. There was an ulterior motive, and whatever the doctor had planned, he wanted to keep it strictly confidential.
Shoving the note in her bag, the teen slid into her jacket, removing the cap that sat on her head as she returned to the foyer. For a moment, she stood and contemplated her options, fingers twitching as jolts of pain jabbed at her palms.
She needed the PTV. She didn't just want it. She needed it, like the oxygen that swarmed her lungs, powerful and refreshing. Anticipation urged her on, yet apprehension held her back, tugging at the nurse until she clutched her head in confusion.
Thinking was tedious. The intern found that she was always thinking about things, trying to rationalize every little detail, every trivial piece of information that gouged at her brain. Perhaps she should try the opposite?
Lisa inhaled, attempting to clear the menagerie of foggy thoughts. Without dwelling on her actions, the intern reached for a nearby phone, dialing her home number. After ringing for a few seconds, her father's voice answered.
'Hello?'
'It's me.'
'Oh.' He replied, going quiet. 'Is everything alright?'
She nodded. 'Yeah, I'm just phoning to tell you that I'll be home late. I've been asked to do a little overtime. The girls are struggling with the lack of staff.'
There was silence, followed by a soft grunt. 'Okay, be careful walking home. It's dangerous at night, especially for a young girl.'
Lisa smiled. Even though they didn't see eye to eye, her father was still very protective of her. 'I'll be fine, I promise. See you later.'
The receiver landed with a ching, falling into place as the girl escaped into the dusty evening. The mist had returned, as it often did whenever the temperature dropped. Straining her eyes, the teen struggled to see past the viscous sheath that enveloped the town.
Why she had decided to oblige the man's request was more complex than simply acquiring the crimson substance. She had barely spoken to him in weeks, and was feeling thankful that he might be willing to see her in person.
The doctor wasn't her friend, but she considered him more than just her superior. As complicated as their relationship was, the young woman was eager to hear what he had to say. She had nothing to give him in exchange for the drug, though he seemed to disagree.
It didn't take her long to reach the motel, and with only a few scarce cars decorating the parking lot, she felt assured that nobody would notice anything untoward. Hoisting the hood of her jacket over her head, she kept her gaze on the floor as she entered the grounds.
Pulling out the small scrap of tattered paper that she'd shoved into her bag, Lisa double checked the room number, wanting to ensure that she had read it correctly. Number three, that was simple enough.
The building's exterior wasn't all that impressive, doused in an unappealing shade of green. It was, however, a suitable place to stay for anyone passing through the town. Clean and quick, it was ideal for those who wanted to come and go in a hurry.
Maneuvering through the empty grounds, the girl gingerly stopped outside Kaufman's room, lifting her hand as she softly rapped her knuckles against the wood. Initially there was silence, and the intern considered calling out to him.
Knocking once more, the director finally released the latch, opening the door to stare blankly at the teen standing before him. After a moments pause, he moved aside to let her pass, leaving the woman loitering uncomfortably as she examined her surroundings.
The decor was certainly minimal, encompassing the lackluster atmosphere delivered by the establishment. A table sat before the bland sofa, accompanied by magazines and a spotless ashtray, making the already cramped space seem claustrophobic.
There was little, if anything, to connect the man with the dingy flat. Lisa surreptitiously eyed the furniture, scrutinizing the pistachio walls and cheap scenery. Shifting nervously, the teen cleared her throat, trying to ignore the sense of dread that clenched at her gut.
'I didn't know you lived here.' She began, deliberately changing the subject.
'I don't.' He replied, though regrettably, made no attempt to explain.
Moving to face his guest, Kaufman took a step towards the intern, forcing her back. Running a hand along her neck, Lisa gazed up at him, witnessing her reflection in the deep onyx of his pupils. She was sweating again, cold and sudden.
The director gave her a curious look, creating space between them as he sat down on the sturdy couch. Crossing one leg at the knee, he leaned back, casually tugging at the collar of his jacket as he scrutinized her from afar.
When almost a minute had passed, the man spoke. 'Come and sit down.' He leaned over and gently pat the cushion beside him. 'You'll feel far more comfortable if you take the weight off your feet.'
Hesitant, the girl obeyed, gripping her bag protectively as she sat. Eyes focused on the table, she began to erratically tap her feet against the rug. A hand touched her shoulder, causing the nurse to freeze in place, mouth dry as nausea began to torment her fragile stomach.
Turning to meet his gaze, she gradually angled her body towards him, dizzy from the abrupt vertigo. Fiercely clenching the hem of her dress, she watched her knuckles turn white as she scrambled to regain her balance.
'So, you want more medicine?' He queried, voice deep and imposing. She gave him a slight nod in response. 'It's quite expensive I'm sure you understand that I can't keep handing it out for free?'
Lowering her gaze, the teen ran a hand along her damp forehead. 'How much do you need?'
He released a dry laugh. 'I'm not sure you understand just how exspensive it actually is. The drug is certainly going to exceed your salary. You get paid well, but not that well.'
'You're not going to give me any?'
'I never said that.'
With one arm casually lying atop the backrest, he leaned in so that their faces were almost touching, lips hovering above hers. She could smell the powerful musk residing in his pores, meandering through the air and stinging her eyes.
Lisa had gauged the man's intentions from his body language, pace cautious as he inched closer, hand reaching out to settle on her leg. The callous flesh of his palm was cold, a shiver coursing through her as she reacted to the sudden chill.
'Are you afraid?' He asked, a glimmer of amusement crossing his features.
She blinked, taking a moment to register the question. Was she afraid? Here was a man who knew how to get what he wanted, a man who liked things to go his way. Yet despite being alone with him, the teen felt strangely at ease.
'No.' She finally answered.
'Good.' He breathed, lifting himself off the couch. 'When money isn't an option, there are other ways to pay off debts.'
He reached for a nearby door knob, twisting it until the hinge creaked from exertion. Rising to her feet, she peered into the adjoining room, containing only a set of drawers and a bed. Heedful, she stepped inside, wiping clammy hands on her clothing.
The doctor perched himself beside her, springs wailing beneath the combined weight of their bodies. She had been waiting for this moment, haunted by those unbearable dreams that seemed to emphasize the darkest parts of her sexuality.
But before she could be satisfied with the outcome, she considered the unfortunate circumstances which had led to her meeting the man. This was not an act of love, but something more sinister. He was taking advantage of her, and she was letting him.
'This isn't right.' She mumbled, voice barely audible in the silence of the room.
Kaufman made a small sound, reaching out to play with a lock of the girl's hair. Twisting it around his finger, he gave the strawberry blonde curl a soft tug, smirking when the teen pulled away from him with a distasteful frown.
Another dilemma had arisen, and she wasn't quite sure what to do. The scenario had played out differently in her head, as opposed to the harsh reality of the current exchange. Even so, she found her body going warm with a familiar heat, pulsing between her thighs and forcing the girl to clamp both legs shut.
Cursing her inability to control the emotions that pulsed through her hunched frame, Lisa buried her face in her hands, inhaling deeply as she mulled over her indecisive nature. Aware that the man was watching her, she straightened up, removing her jacket and folding it neatly as she set it down upon the tawdy carpet.
'You don't have to do this, I've already made that clear.'
She shook her head. 'I do, otherwise I won't get what I came for.'
As she reached down to remove her cardigan, the director gently caressed her cheek, taking the teen by surprise. Flushing red, she let them warm the man's cool fingers as he ran the tips across her supple skin.
'If you want to do something, you should just do it.' He told her, removing a strand of hair from her face. 'True, I won't give you the PTV without anything in return, but if you weren't prepared for this, you wouldn't have come.'
Lisa peered back at the bed she was sitting on, wondering how many more women had shared it with the man. She didn't particularly want to find out, accepting, somewhat reluctantly, that Kaufman had correctly identified the source of her problem.
She had been willing to provide sex as payment, that much was true, but she had also wanted intimacy, to relieve herself of the pent up frustration, the arousal that seemed to burn passionately whenever they were together.
Lisa had hoped for flowers and hearts, things which the man was incapable, or at least unwilling, to provide. A dingy motel was not her idea of romantic, yet she also knew that romance was something beyond the director's capabilities.
Why waste money on trying to woo the girl, when he already had her under his thumb?
'Well?' He quizzed, waiting for her to respond.
'We went to the theatre, and you were so nice to me, but after you've had your way, you're just going to discard me like a used hanky.'
The director scoffed. 'Handkerchief's may stain, they may lose their colour, but they're still handkerchiefs. They still have their uses. Isn't this what you want?'
She shrugged. 'I don't know.'
'It's a mutual agreement.' The older man continued, beginning to unfasten his tie. 'No commitment, no responsibility, just two people enjoying one another's company.'
Slipping off her red cardigan, the young woman thought about his words, running them through her mind in a perpetual circle as she continued to undress. Perhaps it was better that way, to remain as two ships passing in the night.
Besides, what was so bad about having a casual relationship? As the girl slid out of her pumps, she decided that with enough effort, it was almost possible to pretend they were a couple. Even if it was only for one night, she wanted to lose herself in the fantasy.
It's a little sad. She lamented, removing the badge that clung to her cotton dress. I never thought I'd let someone use me like this.
With a sorrowful sigh, she reluctantly gripped the hem of her skirt, faltering before she began to roll it up her thighs. There was something shameful about the act, and Lisa paused as she contemplated how to handle the quandary that she found herself in.
'I'm a little nervous.' She muttered, voice breaking as she spoke.
'Is this your first time?'
She shook her head, trying to avoid staring directly at the man. It was a lie, and though she knew it pointless to evade the truth, she didn't feel quite so childish. How difficult could it be? All she had to do was lie there.
'Well then,' He continued, unbuckling his belt. 'This won't be too problematic.'
'No.' She whimpered, clasping slender fingers over his much larger hands. 'I'm...I don't...' She made a sound of frustration. 'I've never done this. I mean, I've done things, but never...this.'
Face empty, the man resumed undressing. 'Then this will be a new experience for you.' As he slowly began to unbutton his shirt, the director peered at the teen from his peripheral vision. 'Having second thoughts? We can stop.'
'No, I want to do this.'
She considered asking him to look away, but decided it was ultimately pointless. Realizing he was paying more heed to his own body than hers, she quickly removed the remaining clothing, gasping as the draughty air chilled her naked body.
Scrambling for the sheets, the girl buried herself beneath them, trembling from anxiety, anticipation and fear. It was a horrible concoction of opposing emotions that threatened to tear the woman apart. She hadn't been alone with a man for such a long time.
Closing her eyes, she felt the duvet slide back, teasing her waiting flesh as the doctor lay down beside her, bare limbs colliding as he made himself comfortable. A whirlwind erupted within her, pulling her stomach into tight knots as she forced herself to peer back at him.
'Are you ready?'
A quivering, uncertain breath escaped her lips, evaporating into the thin air. She chuckled, more out of nerves than any real humour. 'I'm ready.'