Disclaimer: I do not own any of these characters. They are all property of J.K. Rowling.

Chapter 21

Our Secret

Draco held Hermione close as they slept, never wanting to let her go. She was so precious, she was his every thing. The pain he felt inside was unbearable, he didn't understand why he felt this pain, but still, it was there. He had so much to tell her, so much he wanted her to know. But how was he supposed to tell her?

Hermione was the first to wake. She didn't move as she lay in Draco's arms wondering why he had been crying when she saw him. She remembered how cold she had been to him earlier in the day. 'I'm such a selfish git,' she though to herself.

Carefully she rolled over on her left side so she could put her head on Draco's chest, he was still fast asleep. She closed her eyes and listened to his heart beating in her ear. His heart beat captivated her every time she listened to it; there was something magical about it. No, something about him was magical.

Thirty minutes, maybe forty-five, passed as Hermione lay with her head on Draco's chest, him still asleep. She wondered if he was ever going to wake up. He looked so peaceful, so beautiful; she couldn't bring herself to wake him, not now, not after the way she behaved, not after what happened in the court room. She exhaled heavily and decided it was time for her to get out of bed, dinner was only an hour away and she was hungry.

She moved slowly so she wouldn't disturb Draco as she got out of the bed. Looking over her shoulder she slipped her shoes on and threw her black school robe on. Taking one last look at Draco, she left the hospital and set off for the Gryffindor Common Room. It had been so long since she had seen her fellow Gryffindor's. Sure Ginny, Harry, and Ron were regulars in the hospital, but Neville and Seamus hardly visited anymore, not to mention the other students. She wondered if they all thought she had died.

As she reached the portrait of the Fat Lady, she realized, she didn't know the password.

She stood looking at the fat Lady, for several long minutes. 'Great,' she thought.

"Dear, if you don't have the password, I can not let you in." The Fat Lady said yawning.

"I've been in the hospital for two weeks you cow!" Hermione had had enough.

Just as she turned to storm off, she bumped into Ron.

"Ouch! Watch it, Hermione." He said.

Hermione scoffed, "You watch it!"

Ron smiled. "Come on then. Pumpernickel Pie"

Hermione shook her head, Gryffindor passwords were always ridiculous.

She followed Ron inside the Common Room and as she walked in, every head in the room turned toward her. She was a bit used to it though, any time she passed a student in the hall, they stared at her as if she had three heads. She didn't think she resembled Fluffy, but then again, maybe she was wrong.

She ignored all of the looks and the whispering, she figured it wasn't worth it to say something, because that would just give them more of a reason to talk as if she wasn't there. She and Ron took seats at the back of the common room, near Ginny and Harry.

It appeared that Ginny was working on an assignment and Harry was writing a letter.

"What are you doing?" Hermione asked; craning her neck to look at Ginny's parchment.

Ginny moved her assignment over so Hermione could see it, "I'm doing some Transfiguration homework Professor McGonagall assigned earlier this week, it was due today but since we went to the trial, I figure she will let me hand it in on Monday."

Hermione smiled, "I can help you with it, if you like, Gin, I don't mind."

Ginny shrugged, "I'm not really having trouble with it, but you can if you want to."

Hermione liked doing assignments, she was very studious, and not having any of her own was driving her mad. She was more than willing to help Ginny with her assignments, and Ron and Harry if they wanted her too.

"Harry, what are you doing?" She said taking the Transfiguration book from Ginny's lap.

Harry didn't look up. "I'm just writing to Moony, telling him what happened today and giving him an update on you and Draco. He's told me to tell him how you guys are doing; he thinks a lot of you, Hermione."

Hermione turned her head and stared at the floor in front of her, "I know he does."

Ron glanced from Harry to Hermione then back again. "Oi, Hermione, I've got loads of homework you can help me with." He winked at Ginny.

"She's not going to do all of your assignments for you, Ron, jeez." Ginny scowled.

Ron didn't listen, "I'll just go and get some of the ones I've been having trouble with." And he turned to run up to his dormitory for his book bag.

Hermione looked over at Ginny. "He's mad if he thinks I'm going to do all of his homework. But I've said I would help you first, and so I will."

When Ron returned, Hermione was absorbed in helping Ginny with her work, so he threw his book bag down at Hermione's feet and plopped down in a chair.

Hermione was still helping her friends with their studies when Draco woke up. His stomach was growling and his sides ached. He only ate a few bites of toast for breakfast and he hadn't eaten lunch, he was starving. He looked around the hospital, but he already knew no one was there. He was alone again. Alone with his thoughts and the memory of what he had seen in Hermione's folder.

He sighed to him self and said, "What am I going to do?"

This question was rhetorical, of course, but he answered him self. "I'm going to deal with it, for now. We don't need any more excitement, least this kind."

He desperately wanted to sit up in his bed, but even though he was stronger in his arms, he couldn't manage to pull himself up. He wished someone would come in, he didn't care who, just anyone that could help him sit up. He was getting very discouraged with him self, not being able to walk, it was absolutely maddening. He huffed and puffed a few times, before giving up and continuing to lie there, on his back, staring up at the ceiling.

Why was Madam Pomfrey not in the hospital? It was the place she worked, after all.

His anger got the best of him, he refused to be incompetent any longer, he was going to make his legs work; he was tired of depending on people.

Draco sat up in his bed and grabbed his right leg with both hands, after a few minutes of struggling with it; he threw it over the side of his bed and began working with his left leg. Once both of his legs were dangling over the edge of his bed, he scooted himself up so his feet touched the cold stone below him. He looked around the room and when he was positive no one was coming in, he gave himself a push with his arms.

The ending result wasn't at all what he had expected. As he pushed himself off his bed, his legs declined the weight of his torso. Automatically his ankles turned in and his knees buckled. He fell forward and as his knees hit the hard stone, they slipped out from underneath him causing him to fall face first on the ground.

When he fell, he hit his head, hard, on the floor and the breath was knocked out of him. He rolled over and blinked frantically as everything around him began spinning. He thought he was going to black out. The only words he could hear were spoken in Hermione's voice, 'Oh Draco, what have you done?' He tried to concentrate on the words, he knew they weren't real, but he wanted to keep from passing out. He closed his eyes and licked his lips, tasting blood. After lying very still for a good five minutes, he reopened his eyes. The room had stopped spinning but his head was pounding. 'Ouch.' He thought. As he lay on his back on the cold stone floor, he rubbed his lips with the back of his hand. There was a significant amount of blood on his hand and his lips felt like they were twenty sized too big. His front teeth broke through his bottom lip when he fell, and he busted his nose. 'Great, this is just great, way to go Mr. I-can't-let-anyone-help-me-because-I'm-self-centered-and-obnoxious, now you're on the floor. Brilliant!'

He wiped at his face, more mad than he was before, trying to clean the blood off. But it was no use, as soon as he wiped it away, more blood poured out from his mouth and nose. He didn't want to try and move ever again, he was in more pain now than he was when Snape cursed him. His heart was still pounding his chest and his face began worse than before.

Draco knew he needed to get himself back into bed, he didn't have a clue how he was going to explain what happened to his face, but he did know how mad every one would be if they found him on the floor. He was told plainly by Madam Pomfrey to stay in his bed and not try to move. Why couldn't he have just listened to her? Why did he have to be overbearing and pushy all of the time?

He reached up for the side rail of his bed; it was a bit out of reach but he scooted himself with his arms at his sides until he could reach. Once he had it in his hands he pulled himself up, using every ounce of strength he had left, and was now sitting with his back against his bed.

He could tell by the approaching dusk, it was now dinner time and no one would be coming into the hospital for at least another hour. He had to get himself back into his bed, but he hoped, this time, he could do it without falling.

After sitting against the bed for a few minutes, he crossed his arms over his head and began trying to roll himself over. This, he thought, was possibly the most difficult thing he had ever attempted to do. After a few more very long, tiring, minutes, he had succeeded in turning himself over. So now he was making a sort of 'J' shape with his body, still clutching the rail of his bed. He pulled himself up as far as he could, so he could hold himself there with one hand and reach for the bed with the other.

His strength was draining quickly from his body and he knew it. He had to hurry and get back up into his bed before he collapsed. He searched of his blanket, and upon finding it he held onto it with his left hand and tried to pull himself up. As he pulled himself up further on the bed, the blanked began slipping, so he repositioned his hand to continue pulling. After about two minutes of his alternating of hand positioning, Draco's chest was now half way up the side of the bed. Now that he knew his legs would not support him, he switched hands, now his left was holding him up on the bed rail and his right was on the blanket. He extended his right arm over to the opposite side of the bed and pulled himself up on the bed, to where his naval touched the side of the mattress.

He rested for a few moments. By this time his whole body was covered in sweat and blood was dripping off his chin and down his chest. Which coincidentally, when he was pulling himself up onto the bed, the blood rubbed off onto the white sheets. Once he thought he could stand to pull himself up just a little more, he gave the mattress a tug with his right hand and pulled himself thigh high on the bed.

This was as good as it was going to get, in Draco's eyes. He let himself lay, face down, on the bed, before rolling over onto his back. He needed a rest. He lay there for several minutes, occasionally spitting out blood onto the sheets. Once he felt he could move again, he stretched out his arms and pushed himself up. The position he was now in, made him look like he was doing a push-up. He bent his right arm at his elbow then pushed hard up and flipped over in the air and landed on his back on his bed. His legs swung uselessly in the air as he landed.

He was now lying on his back and could have definitely stayed there and not moved, had his head not been hanging half way off the bed, causing blood to pour into his nostrils. He sat up and scooted inch by inch to the head of the bed. Then he tugged his legs up.

His body was completely on the bed at this time, but there was a bit of irony in his actions. He was lying in the exact same position, that had angered him so much, he hurtled himself out of bed and caused himself much more pain than he would have had if he had just continued lying there.

Draco didn't know exactly how long it took him to get back up on his bed, but he was sure it was at least thirty minutes. He lay his head back on his pillow and brought his blanked up to his face, so he could apply pressure to his nose and stop the bleeding.

He had only been laying there for ten minutes when the door opened and Hermione walked in. He didn't look up at her because his nose had finally almost completely stopped bleeding and he didn't want it to start again.

Taking one look at Draco's blood covered bed clothes, Hermione ran to his side. "Oh, Draco, what have you done?"

Her words rang in Draco's ears; he had heard the exact same ones, when he was lying, face down, on the floor. He didn't answer her right away.

"I fell." His voice was muffled by the blanket.

"Draco, did you try to get out of your bed?" Hermione asked; a hint of anger in her voice.

"Yes." At least he was being honest.

"Draco! You've been told not to try and use your legs! Why didn't you ask someone to help you?" She said as she tried to take the blanket from Draco's face.

Draco took in a deep breath, he was getting angry now; how could she ask him that? She didn't know what it was like to not being able to use your legs. She had no idea how he felt. He was alone, how was he supposed to ask for help?

His anger bubbled to the surface; it was evident in his voice, "Hermione can you please tell me how exactly you expected me to ask someone to help me when I was alone? No one around here gives a damn about me, they all think only of them selves. Yeah just don't worry about Draco, he'll get along. Then when I try to help myself, you get mad at me! What do you want from me, honestly?" He threw the blanket from his face.

Hermione gasped when she saw his lips and his nose, "That isn't fair! Don't you go--"

Draco cut her off. "No, Hermione, what isn't fair is the fact that you and every one of your damned friends, and the people who I thought were my friends, can go off and do what you want and I have to stay here!" He gestured at the room around him with his hands. "I can't do a bloody thing for myself, I'm lucky I can even feed myself. I can't do a damn thing right, I couldn't help you when you needed me, and I can't help you now! I can't even get my dick hard for you so I might show you there is something I am good at. Why am I even here? Huh? Can you tell me, because I really can't find a reason?"

Hermione's eyes widened. She didn't want to have a row with Draco, not now, not after court. "Draco, I understand you're mad and you're hurt, but that is no reason for you to take it out on me! You're having muscle problems right now, and I understand that, but that is no reason to go and blame your self or say none of us care about you. And as far as out sex life goes, that isn't the reason I am with you, that's not all you are good for."

Draco scoffed. "Right, but earlier today, it was perfectly fine for you to piss on me. Sure, piss on the guy that can't walk. Take it all out on him because there's nothing he can do about it. He doesn't understand what it's like to be hurt; he's too stupid to realize he can't do anything. I know more than you think I do about these things." With his rising anger his nose began bleeding; he didn't bother to wipe it away as it trickled down his chest.

Hermione looked away. "I didn't mean to. I never said you were stupid, I know you've been hurt, but please don't take this out on me, I don't think I can handle it. Not now."

"But it was okay for you to go and get all shirty with me today, though you knew I was having just as bad of a day as you were." He wiped his nose with one hand, slinging blood down on the already stained blanket.

"I told you I didn't mean to, damn it Draco. You are not going to sit there and make me feel miserable because you went and hurt yourself, instead of waiting on someone to be able to help you!" Hermione spat at him as she stood up.

Draco suddenly felt like a huge prat. He didn't need to be taking out his anger on her, it wasn't right. His face softened. "Hermione, I'm sorry."

"Don't do that." She said walking toward the shower room.

"What?" His face screwed up in confusion.

"Don't say you're sorry just because you think you've made me mad. It doesn't mean anything unless you know why you made me mad." She disappeared behind the door.

Draco sat there, with the back of his hand against his nose for a moment, until she reappeared. "But I am sorry. I know it's not right for me to get angry with you. This," He moved his hand, "is my fault, not yours or any one else's. I knew better than to try and get out of this damn bed with out help. I just wanted to do something for myself. I wanted to show you that I am not incompetent. I was hungry and there wasn't any one around to tell. And when I fell, it made me so angry. It was a stupid thing to do."

Hermione had a damp wash cloth in her hands when she reached Draco. She began wiping the blood off of his chest and his face. "You're right; it was a stupid thing to do. Did you think about what could have happened to you?"

Draco shook his head, not only to tell her 'no' but because she was hurting him with the pressure she was using to clean off the blood.

"Stop moving. You're making this very difficult. I need to be able to see it before I can mend it." She grabbed his face in one hand and kept wiping at the blood with the other.

"That hurts!" Draco yelled.

"Oh you hush, you brought it upon yourself, you know." She said, sounding much like he thought a mother would sound.

"I don't want you to mend it." He said, still trying to get his face out of her hand.

Hermione stopped cleaning him off. "What? You don't think I can do it?"

"No, it isn't that. I just don't want you to fix it. I was being stupid when it happened and I think I need to leave it, as a reminder." He answered.

Hermione began wiping up the blood again, "Okay, but can I at least stop the bleeding?"

Draco nodded.

He was glad she stopped wiping his face, it felt like she was only making his cuts worse.

Hermione put the wash cloth on the bed side table and reached into her pocket to pull out her wand. She aimed the wand at Draco's face and said an incantation. The blood immediately stopped flowing out his nose and lips. She put her wand down on the bed side table and stared at Draco's face.

"Thank you." He said, thought it was more for the fact that she stopped wiping at his skin than that she made the bleeding stop.

She sat down on the edge of his bed and said, "You're welcome."

Looking up at Hermione made Draco remember those same four words he read in her file. He wanted to tell her. He needed to tell her. But how could she not know already? Thinking back, it was rather obvious to him.

He reached his right hand out for Hermione's face. She didn't resist him as he pulled her closer to him so he could kiss her.

His kiss was gentle and light; it would cause him much pain to kiss her like he wanted to.

Hermione kissed his bottom lip, then his nose. "I love you, you silly thing."

He smiled. "I love you too, Hermione. What would I do with out you?"

She laughed, "For starters, you'd still be bleeding."

He looked away from her for a second then back into her eyes. "Lay with me?"

Hermione didn't need to answer. She kicked off her shoes and laid her body against his. He put his right arm under her neck and his left over her stomach.

"I have something I need to tell you." He said as he gave her stomach an affectionate pat.

Hermione turned her head so she was looking at his face. Even with a busted nose and lips, he was so handsome.

"First, I want to ask you this, and I want your honest answer." He said as he moved his head so he could see into her eyes. He knew she was waiting for him to ask his question.

"Do you love me?" He asked seriously.

Hermione didn't bat an eye, "with all my heart."

He smiled. "If I asked you, would you marry me?"

Hermione's brow furrowed, "are you asking me?"

Draco's heart skipped a beat, "If, I did, what would you say."

Hermione shook her head in confusion, "Why are you asking me this, Draco?"

Draco sighed, "Because I want to know before I tell you this."

"Just tell me, there's no need in asking questions to which you already know the answers."

"Hermione, you are with child." Draco said kissing Hermione on the forehead.

A/N: Ok so I fixed this chapter because there was a major typo. Sorry bout that. I hope you all liked it, let me know your opinion. Sway