Chapter 21: She Knows

Leah and Rosalie came home as soon as the sun went down. Rosalie entered the house first. I was sitting to myself I really had no words for anyone. I was too busy hating myself for hurting everyone and putting their lives at risk again. Now innocent people could be hurt, Bella might be killed all because I simply changed my mind. If I was human this wouldn't have been a problem. Some humans change partners as frequently as they change their socks.

"Leah wants to talk to you." She went upstairs and Emmett followed her, not before mentally wishing me luck. I went to meet Leah outside. "Edward, she knows everything. I don't think you're going to like what she has to say." Rosalie looked at me this time her eyes were apologetic. I tried to explain it from your perspective but she was enraged . . . she turned for the first time since losing her memory. I don't know if her love for you will be enough.

I went outside and Leah was still sitting in the car on the passenger side. Against my logical sense I got into the car with her. Tears; so many tears and she was shaking all over. "I'm sorry." I whispered.

"Not good enough." She finally uttered after several attempts. "You should have told me! Everything!"

"I know. I was going to tell you last night. Remember Leah? I did try! I know it was wrong to do what we did before I told you, but I seriously was going to tell you today. Then we had to come back and everything got turn around. Please know that I wasn't trying to hurt you." I went to touch and she flinched away.

"Yeah right," she scoffed, "you've made me a marked bitch! You do realize I will never be treated the same again." She got out of the car slamming the door behind her.

"What are you talking about?" I followed her into the front yard.

"My pack. If I turn, and they are turned they will all know what I've done . . . with a LEECH!" Her tears flowed again. Her tears hurt me, but I was more hurt by her terminology. What happened to calling me Eddie? I missed it already.

"I'm supposed to kill the likes of you, not fuck it." She sobbed, "I swear to God I can't do anything right!" I wanted to comfort her. "Don't touch me!"

"We didn't fuck last night . . . that's not what it was. I love you." She grabbed her head and she shook so hard that I thought she was going to phase but instead she dropped to her knees and threw up.

"I want to go home." She said as she calmed herself after a few minutes she picked herself up from the ground.

"You are home sweetheart." I said and she glared at me.

"Don't . . . you know what I mean." She went to get in the car. Are you taking me or what?" Her tone was so cold and she wouldn't even look at me.

"What is going on here?" Carlisle stormed outside I'd never heard such anger in his tone. Rosalie stood at the door frame. Apparently she had told Carlisle what had happened and they had been listening to our conversation. He went to check on Leah and she pulled away from him too.

"You're one of them too, huh, and so is Rose, everyone I cared about I supposed to hate." She cried again. "I have to go home Carlisle . . . and you've already got enough your plate with Bella living here now." I know I really couldn't handle that.

"Leah, I'm going to say something to you and I want you to really hear me . . . it's not what we are but who we are that define us . . . that goes for you too," Carlisle said and she smiled and let him wipe her tears. "We all love you very much Leah. You may know all of the major things that happened to you but there's a lot of little stuff you need to remember. I'd rather you stay until you did. You learned a lot today you're probably in some state of shock." He put his arm around her (where my arm should be) and led her to the house. "All final decisions can be made in the morning."

All night long her sobs over us killed me. She cried into her pillow with her two wants tearing her apart. Images of last night traveled through her mind and then the ripple and charge of transforming. She was convinced that the two of us didn't work. That us being together would destroy her family, her whole tribe. I honestly didn't think we would have an effect on that many people. I hated her regret. I covered my ears for what good it would do and tried to remember her actual thoughts during our love making.

Harder baby, as hard as you can, she had thought. As I gave her what her body had wanted. I tried to remember how she scooted closer to me wanting and needing me inside of her. I focused on the feel of her gentle yet forcefully hot hands playing at my ribcage and along my spine. I closed my eyes and tried to remember the way her eyes glistened with a shine of lust that possessed them. All those memories were starting to blur as her dread came through loud and clear, not only that she acted as though our actions had been disgusting. I sat at the piano but couldn't play. Not with memories of her smiling and talking to me here quickly fading away from me.

"Edward?" Esme came and sat beside me.

"Can someone please make her stop crying!" The words hurt but it was best way to let her know what was bothering me.

"Oh, son." She rubbed my back and put her head on my shoulder (where Leah's head should be). If I could cry . . . lets just say I wanted to punch a wall, that's how strong my frustration was. Why didn't I listen to Rosalie? At least then I wouldn't be dealing with this right now. "She loves you. That's why she's hurting so bad. Once she heals she will come back to you. How could she not? You're such a charming young man." Esme smiled up at me to reassure me and it almost worked, but then Leah's sobs became louder.

"Just earlier this week we were laughing and kissing. I may never . . . be with her again." I clenched my hands into fists.

"In this situation you've gotta have faith." She hugged me and went to leave.

"Esme, can you stay please. Just for a little while." She smiled warming and sat back down.

"Of course . . . but only if you play for me."

"I'll try," I gave her the best smile I could muster and began to play the song I'd created for her. At least the sounds of the piano drowned out her sobs.

Author's Note: Extremely short chapter! Sorry about that! I promise the next will be longer. As always please read and review (no flames).