Because You Loved Me
by Celine Dion
Set somewhere after Neighborhood watch.
Kensi was pacing her home. Deeks had been avoiding her for days now. She had no idea what was wrong with him. They used to spend almost every night together watching tv and drinking beer. Then Deeks just up and stopped coming over. When Kensi went to his place he wouldn't come to the door even though she knew he was there.
Did he meet someone? Kensi just wish she knew. Finally Kensi gave up pacing and dropped to the couch. She grabbed her phone and called Nell.
"Nell I need your help."
"Sure Kensi what's going on?"
"Do you know what's wrong with Deeks?"
"Um look its none of my business."
"Oh my god you do know. You better tell me now!"
"Ok calm down. Look the other day he heard you talking to Sam and Callen about him. He got the idea that he's just a joke to you, to all of you."
"What?" Kensi was shocked. Ok they had talked about him but it was all good. She was telling them about the stupid story he had told that morning. "Nell you know that's not true."
"I know that but he doesn't. Look Kensi he's thinking about going back to LAPD."
"Shit. Ok Nell thanks."
"You better just tell him how you feel and stop being scare or you're going to lose him completely."
Nell hung up and looked over at Eric. They both hope this worked out for the best.
Kensi was beyond scared. She couldn't lose Deeks. Nell was right she had to do something and fast. Kensi went into her room and pulled out a box. Looking thru it she found the old CD she wanted. It was a copy of one of her favorite CD's. She didn't need it now as she had it on her iPod. Pulling out some paper and tape she wrote a note to Deeks.
She drove to Deeks and knocked on the door. Hearing Monty start barking Kensi hoped Deeks would open the door. He did. Deeks looked like he hadn't slept in a week.
"Hey."
"Kensi this is not a good time."
"It's ok I just wanted to give you something." Kensi handed him the CD then grabbed Deeks by his shirt and pulled him into her and kissed him. Deeks nearly dropped his beer then almost fell over when she let go.
"I'll be at my place if you want to come over." Kensi started walking away. This was the second time she had kissed him and he had done nothing but stand there. Kensi stopped at her car and looked back up at him. Once she drove away he shut the door and looked at the CD.
"Deeks please play song #8. It says a lot of what I just can't seem to get out to you when we're together. You mean the world to me. Love Kensi"
Wow not what he had expected when he opened the door. Deeks touched his lips and could still feel the tingle from her kiss. He went over to his stereo and popped the CD in. He hoped the thing still worked. He hadn't used a CD in years. Pushing the button to move to song #8 Deeks hit play and went to sit down again.
The song began and Deeks felt his heart tighten.
*For all those times you stood by me
For all the truth that you made me see
For all the joy you brought to my life
For all the wrong that you made right
For every dream you made come true
For all the love I found in you
I'll be forever thankful baby
You're the one who held me up
Never let me fall
You're the one who saw me through, through it all
You were my strength when I was weak
You were my voice when I couldn't speak
You were my eyes when I couldn't see
You saw the best there was in me
Lifted me up when I couldn't reach
You gave me faith 'cuz you believed
I'm everything I am
Because you loved me*
Deeks took a deep breath. Oh god, he had been such an ass. Could Kensi really love him? Deeks laid his head back and closed his eyes.
*You gave me wings and made me fly
You touched my hand I could touch the sky
I lost my faith, you gave it back to me
You said no star was out of reach
You stood by me and I stood tall
I had your love I had it all
I'm grateful for each day you gave me
Maybe I don't know that much
But I know this much is true
I was blessed because I was loved by you
You were my strength when I was weak
You were my voice when I couldn't speak
You were my eyes when I couldn't see
You saw the best there was in me
Lifted me up when I couldn't reach
You gave me faith 'coz you believed
I'm everything I am
Because you loved me
You were always there for me
The tender wind that carried me
A light in the dark shining your love into my life
You've been my inspiration
Through the lies you were the truth
My world is a better place because of you
You were my strength when I was weak
You were my voice when I couldn't speak
You were my eyes when I couldn't see
You saw the best there was in me
Lifted me up when I couldn't reach
You gave me faith 'cuz you believed
I'm everything I am
Because you loved me
I'm everything I am
Because you loved me*
Should he go to her? Deeks finished his beer and looked over at his book case. There were at least ten framed phots there and every one had Kensi in it. Hell most of them were just Kensi. She loved to tease him about the phots. How could he have gotten things so wrong?
Deeks stood up and grabbed his shoes. He clipped Monty's leash on and they headed out the door.
An hour later Kensi was back to pacing. Was he coming? Did he even listen to the song? Oh boy it was killing her. She felt the tears start to fall and wrapped her arms around her body. He couldn't leave her, he just couldn't. Kensi didn't think she could stand to lose him now.
Kensi was crying and shaking when Deeks opened her door. He was surprised to find it unlocked. Monty ran to his spot and Deeks simply pulled Kensi into his arms.
"Oh Kensi please don't cry."
"Don't leave me."
Deeks could kick himself. She must have talked to Nell. Nell was the only one who knew he was thinking about leaving NCIS.
Kensi was shaking so bad Deeks was worry she would fall apart.
"I'm not leaving Kensi I promise, now please stop crying." Deeks didn't know what to do. He picked Kensi up and carried her over to the couch. Sitting down he rocked her like you would a child and kissed the top of her head.
Finally Kensi stopped shaking and the tears were less. "Please don't leave me Deeks. I can't lose you too."
"I'm not going anywhere Kensi I promise."
"But you told Nell you were leaving." Kensi had her face buried in Deeks chest. Her fingers clutched at his shirt.
"I know I was mad and I took it out on you."
Kensi pulled away from his chest and looked up at him. "How could you think I thought you were a joke? Deeks I was telling the guys that story you told me in the car that morning. We were not making fun of you."
"Well I know that now."
"Why didn't you just ask me?"
"I was afraid you didn't want me here anymore."
"Deeks I love you of course I want you here."
"You love me?"
"Of course I do." Kensi looked up at him confused. "Deeks we spend close to 20 hours a day together how could you not know?"
Deeks smiled hugely at her. Then it was his turn to take Kensi by surprise. He picked her up again and carried her into her bedroom dropping her on her bed. Kensi looked up at him her eyes wide.
Deeks smiled down at her and pulled his hoodie over his head tossing it across the room. He dropped his jeans and crawled over Kensi covering her body with his.
"So you love me huh?"
"Yes." Kensi was now running her fingers thru his messy hair.
"Good because I love you too."
Deeks leaned down and kissed her until he heard her moan.
"I promise you right now Kensi I will never leave you willingly."
"You better not."
For the first time that night Kensi smiled. They could talk later right now Kensi just wanted to be with the man she loved.
Early the next morning Deeks was holding Kensi. "By the way I liked your song."
Kensi giggled. "Good."
"How about we make that the song we dance to at the wedding."
Kensi took a deep breath. "Wedding huh?"
"Yep. We'll talk to your mom later today and tell everyone else on Monday.
"And where is my ring mister?" Kensi felt Deeks let go and he got out of the bed. Kensi looked over at him as he dug in his jeans. Finally he pulled out something then slid back into bed.
"Right here." Deeks held up a diamond ring.
"Deeks that looks like my ring?"
Deeks laughed. It was the engagement ring she had worn when they were undercover.
"Yeah well Hetty gave it to me before I left work today and told me to grow a pair and just ask you."
Kensi gasped and Deeks slid the ring on her hand. "She told me we can have the bands too."
Kensi started to cry again. "Oh come on Kensi please don't cry."
"Don't worry Deeks these are happy tears."
"Ok that's good."
Kensi lifted her hand and let the light bounce off her ring. "You know I really do love this ring."
"I know. So did Hetty." Deeks pulled her close. "So Kensi will you marry me?"
"Yes Deeks I will."
The sun slowly came up over Los Angeles that morning, all was right in the world once again and two lovers lay wrapped in each other's arms their loyal dog stretched out at the bottom of the bed.