Pick Up The Pieces

by Alexandria M

Dean Ambrose a single father of a 5 year old little girl lost his wife tragically two years earlier. He is trying to get his life back together and focus on his daughter and their life together after the tragedy. He feels that he could never love someone as much as he loved his wife Saige. As Dean builds his life up will he ever find someone that could steal his heart like Saige?

21. Let Me See You Be Brave

*Thank-you for the reviews on the last chapter. They were greatly appreciated. Thank-you all so much!

DEAN's POINT OF VIEW:

"You can just make yourself comfortable," I say to Renee as we enter the front door of my house. "Just help yourself to anything."

"Are you sure?" she asks as I lay our luggage inside the door. "I don't want to over step my boundaries."

"I'm sure," I say as I wrap her up in my arms catching her by surprise. "I asked you to come stay with me for a couple days. I want you to feel comfortable here," I say.

"Okay," she says with a smile as she wraps her arms around my neck. "Thanks for inviting me to stay here."

"You don't have to thank me," I say with a smile. "I want you to be here. I want to spend as much time with you as I can. I just can't be away from Kennedy so much you know what I mean?"

"I know," she says with a smile before I kiss her lips softly. "I love you."

"I love you too," I say with a smile before I let her out of my embrace. "I'm going to take these upstairs to the bedroom. You want to come with me and then we can go get Kennedy from school. She's going to be excited to see you."

"Sure," she says as I pick up our luggage to take upstairs. She follows me up the stairs to my bedroom and Elsa follows behind her. "You didn't tell me you had a dog," she says.

"That's Kennedy's dog she kind of suckered me into getting it for her," I say as we reach the bedroom and Elsa runs in front of us and jumps up onto the bed. "She loves dogs and she wanted one so badly that I couldn't say no. I found one on the internet and we picked it up. She loves her."

"What's her name?" asks Renee as she pets Elsa with a smile.

"Elsa," I say as I open my bags to pull out my dirty clothes to put into the hamper.

"Elsa? Like as in the movie Frozen?"

"Exactly right," I say with a smile. "Kennedy doesn't like very many Disney movies but she loves that movie and she loves Elsa so she decided to name the dog Elsa. I couldn't say no."

"It's cute," says Renee as she continues to pet her.

"It looks like she likes you," I say with a smile pulling out my clothes to put into the hamper.

"I am like a dog whisperer," she says with a smile. "This is a nice room," she says.

"Yeah," I say, "I love this room. It's the biggest room in the house and the colors are pretty nice."

"Yeah, I like the ocean blue color," she says looking around the room. "It's so relaxing. Is this the room you shared with Saige?"

"Yes it is," I say, "and I have recently started to stay in here again. It was hard for me to come back into this room," I say.

"I can imagine," she says. "I don't think I would be able to either."

"You can look around if you want to," I say, "and like I said just make yourself comfortable."

"All right," she says as she walks away from the bed as she looks around the room as I put my dirty clothes into the hamper in the bathroom so I can do laundry later. "Your wife liked Aubrey Hepburn?"

"Yeah," I say from the bathroom. "She was a big fan of her and Marilyn Monroe," I say.

"She sounds like an awesome woman," she says as she is looking at the picture of Audrey Hepburn on the wall. Saige wanted that picture so badly and I bought her it for her 25th birthday. She loved that picture and she wanted it hanging in our bedroom. I couldn't argue with her. She was so happy to have the picture how could I say no.

"She was," I say. "I was going to take it down but I just couldn't take it down."

"I like the picture," says Renee, "I have the same one."

"Oh yeah," I say, "that's right you do have the same one in your apartment. I take it you like Audrey Hepburn too."

"I do," she says with a smile as she walks over to the patio door. She opens the doors before we walk out onto the balcony. I haven't been out there for years. I forgot how beautiful it was and the view of the desert in the distance is even more beautiful. Renee rests her hands on the railing and looks out over the backyard seeing the pool, Kennedy's swingset and her trampoline. She then looks out over to the desert. "It's a beautiful view," she says.

"It's the most beautiful view," I say as I stand next to her. "I haven't been up here for years," I say looking at the desert in the distance. "I forgot how beautiful it is."

"Are those mountains?" she asks.

"No," I say with a smile, "that's the desert. That's what Kennedy was talking about our special place."

"But she called them mountains."

"The mountains of rocks make her think they are mountains but it's really the desert. She's 6."

"Oh," she says, "It looks beautiful. When can we go to the desert?"

"I don't know we can go after I pick Kennedy up from school if you'd like to or we can wait till another day."

"It's up to you," she says, "but you have a beautiful home."

"Thanks," I say with a smile as we continue to take in the sight in front of us before we walk back into the bedroom. I shut the doors behind us and lock them as Renee checks out the closet and expresses how much she loves walk in closets and how big it is. It makes me smile.

After she looks around the room a little more we make our way downstairs. We decide to hang out in the living room for a little bit until it's time to get Kennedy from school. Renee even offers to cook us dinner tonight. I have no complaints about that. She goes through the cabinets in the kitchen picking out what she wants to make before we go to pick Kennedy up from school. "You know you really don't have to cook dinner for us if you don't want to," I say as we stand outside waiting for Kennedy to come out of the building.

"No I want to," she says as I keep my arm wrapped around her shoulder. "I see you have an audience here," she says with a smile talking about the moms looking at us. These are the same moms that do everything in their power to talk to me and get me to go out on a date with them.

"I'm not worried about them," I say. "They are probably surprised I'm here with a woman. Usually it's just me and they are trying to flirt it up with me."

"I see," she says with a smile before I kiss her cheek softly giving our audience something to talk about as the bell rings for the kids to be dismissed. "You're trying to cause trouble."

"No, just want them to see that I am happily taken," I say with a smile.

"DADDY!" yells Kennedy as she comes running toward me. She stops as she sees Renee and the smile on her face gets even bigger before she continues to run over to us. "Daddy," she says as I scoop her up in my arms as she wraps her little arms around my neck.

"Hey, Ken," I say with a smile. "How was school today?"

"Good," she says with a smile as she looks at me. "We learned about the Statue of Liberty today and I told everyone that I got to see the Statue of Liberty in New York."

"Did you?" I ask with a smile. "What did they say?"

"They said it was cool that I got to see Lady Liberty," she says with a smile. "Hi, Renee," she says as she puts her arms out for Renee to take her from me.

"Hi, Kennedy," she says with a smile as she takes her from my arms. "Sounds like you had a good day at school. What else did you learn about?"

"We learned how to count by 5's today," she says with a smile. "What are you doing here?"

"I came to spend a couple days at the house with you and Daddy," she says. "Is that okay?"

"It's perfect," says Kennedy with a smile before I open the car door for her. Renee puts her into her car seat and buckles her in while I get into the driver's seat before Renee gets into the passenger's side. I turn the radio on before I pull out of my parking space and we sing along to the songs on the radio on the way home.

When we get home I help Kennedy with her math homework in the living while Renee works on dinner in the kitchen. The smell of spaghetti fills the house and my stomach growls as I take in the scent of her dinner. "It smells good, Daddy," says Kennedy as she's working on writing one of her letters.

"It does," I say, "we're getting a home cooked meal how about that?" I ask.

"I like it," she says with a smile. "Chicken nuggets and hot dogs were getting boring."

"I only make them because you want me to."

"Those are the only things you can cook," she says.

"I can cook other things too you just never ask for anything different."

"Like what?" she asks.

"Let's see I can make pizza, frozen pizza though, grilled cheese, pancakes okay I can cook anything that comes from the freezer or from a can."

"Exactly," she says with a smile. "But you try Daddy. That's all that matters."

"Thanks, Princess," I say with a smile as I run my hand through her blonde hair. "That means a lot to me."

"Good," she says with a smile before she gets back to writing the letter she's been working on. I smile as I watch her write the letter M all over the paper with a couple of easy words. As she finishes up her homework she shows me all her papers before I put them back into her folder and sign that we did everything and to let the teacher know I got all of her papers she brought home from school before I put her folder into her book bag. She hangs it up by the door and then climbs up with me on the couch to watch some TV while we wait for dinner.

"Dinner's ready," says Renee as she appears in the living room shortly after we start watching Girl Meets World.

"Coming," I say with a smile as I stand up. Kennedy stands up with me and we make our way into the kitchen. Renee has the table set perfectly with spaghetti on each of our plates along with a piece of garlic bread with a glass of water in front of each plate. "It looks good, Baby," I say with a smile.

"Thanks," she says as we take a seat at the table.

She starts to pick up some spaghetti with her fork before Kennedy stops her. "Wait, Renee!"

"What?" she asks.

"You didn't pray. We have to pray before we eat," she says. "Here give me your hand, Daddy, Give me your hand," she says making me smile. I give her my hand the same time that Renee does. "I'll say it." We bow our heads as she goes into her prayer. "Dear God, thank-you for this food and thank-you for giving us another day. Amen," she says before we lift our heads and begin eating. "This is REALLY good, Renee!"

"Thank-you," says Renee with a smile.

"You did an amazing job," I say smiling at her. "It's delicious."

"Thank-you," she says with a smile before she takes a bite of her spaghetti.

"Daddy doesn't cook much," says Kennedy, "so this is great."

"She's right," I say with a small chuckle.

"Only stuff that's frozen or comes from a can," says Kennedy.

"Well," says Renee with a smile, "it was my pleasure to cook for both of you. I hope I can do it more often."

"I would like that!" says Kennedy with a smile before we continue to eat. I have to give credit Renee is a great cook and the dinner she made us was delicious. We spend our dinner talking about Kennedy's day and telling her about our time on the road. Once dinner is over I do the dishes for Renee while she plays with Kennedy in the living room before I give Kennedy her bath and put her to bed.

"Goodnight, Kennedy," I say as I tuck her into bed.

"Goodnight, Daddy," she says with a smile as she hugs onto the teddy bear Renee got her as well as her mom's scarf. "I love you."

"I love you more," I say with a smile.

"I love you more," she says.

"I love you times infinity," I say.

"I love you times infinity times infinity," she says.

"All right," I say, "you win but I really do love you."

"I know, Daddy," she says. "I like Renee is she going to live with us?"

"Maybe someday" I say "right now she's just going to be visiting a couple days a week with me so that we can spend time together."

"I like that," she says. "And she knows how to cook."

"That she does," I say with a smile. "What do you really think of Renee?"

"I really really really like her and I know she loves you. She always looks at you with these eyes and has this smile on her face. You do the same thing you look at her the same way and she makes you smile. I forgot your smile because you never smiled much until Renee. She makes you happy and she makes me happy, Daddy. You should marry her."

"Maybe someday I will," I say with a smile. "Would you like that?"

"Yeah," she says, "and a little brother too."

"Well, that little brother is going to be a long way away."

"Why?" she asks.

"Because you're so special and so awesome that right now I want to dedicate all my time to you and only you besides don't you like being the only child? You get all the attention and all the gifts and you're getting all of my love."

"Yeah but a little brother would be fun to play with. Even a little sister would be fun to play with."

"Well, we'll see what happens in the future right now," I say before I tickle her making her laugh, "it's all about you."

"I like it all about me, Daddy!" she says through her giggles. "Okay, Daddy," she says laughing. "Stop."

"You know you're my number 1 girl right? It's going to be hard to have another little kid that is as awesome as you."

"I know, Daddy," she says, "I am pretty awesome."

"Yes you are," I say with a smile.

"What about Renee? Is she your number 1 girl too?"

"She is," I say with a smile, "you and Renee are my number 1 girls and Grammy too," I say with a smile, "but right now you need to go to bed."

"All right," she says. "Goodnight."

"Goodnight, Boogie," I say with a smile.

"I like when you call me that," she says with a smile.

"I know," I say before I give her a kiss on her forehead. "Now go to sleep."

"Okay," she says with a smile before I turn off the light. I walk over to the door. I look back at her as she cuddles up under her covers I smile before I close the door and make my way downstairs to the living room but I don't see Renee when I get down there.

I walk through the house looking for her and I stop when I see her standing in my office looking at my pictures of Saige. "Renee," I say.

"I'm sorry, I was just," she starts to say as she puts the pictures back.

"It's okay," I say, "don't be sorry."

"You really loved her didn't you?"

"More than anyone will ever know," I say.

"I'm sorry," she says. "It must have been really hard that day," she says.

"It was the hardest day of my life," I say as I walk into my office and take a seat on my desk chair. I motion for her to sit on my lap. She walks over and takes a seat on my lap. "I have never felt so much pain in my life. I never knew a person could feel so much hurt as I did that day."

"What happened?" she asks. "You don't have to answer that if you don't want to."

"No," I say, "I'll answer it. Well, we were having a cookout with Roman, his fiancée, his little girl, my mom and her parents. She had put Kennedy down for a nap she was only 3 years old. She needed to run to the store for something. I didn't want her to go. I told her to wait until the next day but she insisted that she needed to go that very day so she went to the store. She said it would be a quick trip but as the time passed and it got later and she wasn't home I started to get worried about her. I sent her a text to see where she was and what was going on. She sent me back a quick text telling me the store was being robbed and they were being held hostage but she never go to finish the text. I had never been more scared in my entire life," I say. "I didn't know what to do. I tried texting her back and calling her. I wasn't getting a response so Roman and I went to the grocery store. There were tons of people gathered around watching what was going on some family members of the people inside. Most of my time in the parking lot is a blur because I was so worried about Saige. When I got there I just remember them saying that there was hostage shot that needed medical attention. I had no idea what to say or do. I felt so helpless waiting for them to be out. Then finally they shot through the glass doors. They took down the gunman and all these people rushed the building. I waited forever for them to finally bring out Saige but when they brought her out she was on a stretcher and bleeding. She wasn't doing well at all. I went with her to the hospital and I spent another eternity waiting for her. The doctor came out told me they did everything they could do but they couldn't save the baby or Saige and that she was gone."

"She was pregnant?"

"Not far I don't even know if she knew she may have suspected but I don't think she knew. I had no idea it was a shock to me. We were trying so hard for the baby but it never even made it neither did she. It was devastating. I was in so much pain. I didn't know how I was going to tell Kennedy that her mom died and I was alone with a 3 year old. Kennedy is the only other person in this world that knows the pain that I felt when we lost Saige. Kennedy became everything to me. She always was but she is the last living piece of Saige left on this earth. She looks like her mom in every way and her heart is just as big and wonderful as her mom's. It was just us. I didn't know what to do. I didn't even have an idea of what went on in that store until a couple days later when I had other hostages thanking me because Saige saved their lives. They were telling me how much of a hero Saige was. She was trying to negotiate with the gunman. She was trying to calm him down. She saved a little girl that was crying that couldn't have been any older than Kennedy. She took the bullet for her. I don't want to say I am upset that she did it because I probably would have done the same thing and I would want someone to have the heart to save Kennedy like that but damn it," I say with tears in my eyes. "She gave her life and the life of our unborn baby to protect someone else's child. She is a hero. She cared so much. The other hostages told me that Saige didn't back down. She tried to reason with the gunman, tell him that none of this was worth it but in the end she lost her life. She died a hero. Then as the days went on I found out more about this robbery and this hostage situation. They released the gunman's information a few days later and I realized that it was a man that my wife helped put away in case a couple years prior. He had robbed a convenient store and assaulted the clerk to the point the clerk was never able to walk again. My wife was the DA on that case and helped get him a couple years in prison. He was angry with her. He vowed revenge on her, he vowed revenge on me and on Kennedy. He was so angry with Saige. Saige wasn't the type of person to hurt anyone. It came out that he was stalking Saige and had been stalking her for a while. There were pictures of Saige and Kennedy in his apartment. He had been planning for at least a month to take out my wife. He had different ways he was going to do it. He followed her to the grocery store that day, he went in with the intent to kill her and that's just what he did. He didn't care who he hurt in the process as long as he took out my wife he was satisfied."

"Oh my God," says Renee, "that's horrible so he went after Saige for revenge?"

"Yes," I say as she wipes the tears from my eyes. "He wanted revenge for the time he spent in jail because she put him there."

"That's horrible, I'm sorry, Dean."

"Don't be sorry," I say, "as bad as it hurts Saige is in a better place right now. She's not hurting anymore and I know she's safe. There's nothing to be sorry about. Saige was an amazing woman. She died a hero and died giving up her life to save someone else's. It's rough but that mother could have lost her little girl that day but because of Saige she gets to watch her little girl grow up and that little girl gets to have a life. Saige sleeps with the angels now and watches over us every day and keeps us safe. She's in a better place."

"I can't even imagine."

"You don't want to," I say. "The worst pain you can ever feel is the pain of losing someone you love. Ken knows bits and pieces of what happened but not the whole story. She hasn't really asked many questions about it. I know the day is going to come when she asks about it but I hope that's not for a long time. She's so smart that I'm surprised she hasn't asked me about it yet. I have the newspaper articles and the newspaper clippings for her to read when she's older. People around here were really sympathetic after it happened. There were people here to help us out, people that cooked us meals and did all this great stuff for us to help us out. People cared and they were there. You never know how much good is left in the world until there is a tragedy. It's like Saige always said in the times of darkness if you look for the light you're bound to find the goodness but you just have to remember to look for the light. I thought the world was all bad after what happened to Saige but then I realized that there are only some bad people in this world but the goodness always shines through in the dark times. It was hard but it took every bit of strength I had to be a father and heal for my daughter. It took me even longer to get up on my feet and move on. It wasn't easy but once again you start to see the good in people. You were one of the few people in WWE that was there for me when I came back after this tragedy and you were a great friend. You were there for me. I appreciated that. I still do appreciate that the fact that you're so patient with me and give me time to take certain steps I appreciate that. I thought that I would never be able to love again but then you showed me that I can love again, you showed me that I can enjoy life again and that I can be happy again. You make my life better. You're one of the best things to happen to me in the last two years of my life. I miss Saige, I can't lie about that because it's the truth but the way I love you I had no idea I would be able to love another woman again the way I love you."

"Dean," she says with a smile, "that means so much to me. The fact that you can love me and love again after something so horrible that means a lot to me. I love you, Dean."

"I love you too," I say as she kisses the top of my head. "Please don't leave me, Renee. I know I'm a hard man to deal with and I have my way of doing things and it takes time for me but please just keep being patient with me and don't leave me please. I need you in my life. You make me happy. You make me realize what happiness is. I need you."

"Dean," she says, "I'm not going anywhere. I'm not leaving you. I'm going to be here as long as you want me to be here. I promise."

"Even if I want you to be here forever would you be here forever?"

"Forever," she says with a soft smile before she wraps me up in a hug so my head is resting on her chest as I break down into tears as she comforts me through my hard times. I have never told anyone about the day Saige was taken from us at least not that much but for some reason Renee is the only person I feel comfortable telling the story of how my wife was taken from us. I'm a private person but when it comes to Renee I want her to see all of me inside and out. I want her to see my pain, my happiness, my love, I want her to see it all. I want her to know my deepest darkest secrets and the only other person that I felt that way about was Saige and she knew some stuff about me that she never let tear us apart.

*A/N: What did you think of Renee's reaction to the house and being in the bedroom Dean shared with Saige? What do you think of Kennedy telling Dean he should marry Renee? What do you think of how Dean handles Kennedy? Do you think it would be hard for him to have another baby after her? What did you think of Renee looking at the pictures of Saige in DEan's office? What about Dean opening up about Saige's death? What do you think about Saige dying saving someone else's life? What about the man that planned his revenge on Saige? Is Dean right is there still goodness in the world despite the darkness most often seen? What do you think of Dean telling REnee he needs her and he wants her there forever? What do you think Saige knows about Dean that she accepted and didn't let tear them apart? Please review and thank-you for reading.