Disclaimer: I do not own Naruto. It is the property of Masashi Kishimoto, and as such not my intellectual property. There is no financial gain made from this nor will any be sought. This is for entertainment purposes only.
Shadows of a Nightmare Future - Chapter 21
As I sit gingerly on one of the various pieces of debris that now litters the valley, I don't know how to really feel. "I suppose I should feel happy." I muse hesitantly while methodically wiping the crimson streaks of blood from my trench knife across a grimy cloth as Temari hovers protectively nearby, "And I do, but there`s some other troublesome emotions mixed in as well. That's to be expected I guess, but what a drag."
Indeed, there is a great deal more conflict swirling inside me than I ever imagined existing during those rare moments of positivity when I imagined this outcome. The troublesome reality being that, like many things since I had travelled to the past, Sasuke`s demise had not gone entirely to plan.
"You just had to discover us didn't you?" I accuse irritable while finishing my task and allowing my eyes to settle upon the corpse lying face down in a pool of its own blood, "But then again causing trouble for other people was something you always excelled at Sasuke. Even in death you're troublesome."
Truly, given Sasuke`s knack for causing chaos through his actions I suppose I should be ecstatic that things had ended up like this at all. Yet, the fact remains that as a result of our discovery we would likely face an enquiry into our actions and more significantly lose a friend. The former, possible proving a dangerously troublesome affair, while the latter a personal blow that I never wished to incur. As such, both outcomes are marring my accomplishment with equal parts dread and annoyingly troublesome guilt.
"Should I have killed Sasuke?" A query that made those feelings all the more burdensome as I can't help but play devil's advocate to the opposite solution that I pursued. The reason being that given Sasuke`s incapacitation, we could have simply captured him and avoided much of the negatives consequences that will surely result now.
Certainly, without team 7`s covering up of Sasuke`s intentions following the defeat of Kaguya the likelihood of him being forgiven was next to none. As a result, the already antagonistic Kage would have likely had few qualms about incarcerating Sasuke for the rest of his days and thus removing him as a threat to the world's future. Furthermore, although Naruto would not be happy with such a scenario in time I think he would have come to accept it.
"With my and Temari`s testimony, Sasuke could have been dealt with and we would have avoided a great deal of this unpleasantness." I consider wistfully despite myself, "Hell as much as I hate to admit it there was a time where he appeared to have changed for the better. For all I know a prison term could have cemented that change if he was released at some point. It's still kind of a shock that he ended up turning against us like that. "
Indeed, after the defeat of Momoshiki Ōtsutsuki, Sasuke spent more and more time in the village as well as with his family while appearing to become more content. Yet, as more individuals who seemed hell-bent on destroying or conquering the world continued to present themselves, Sasuke became withdrawn. Although I never discovered the truth of the matter, I suspect that it was during this time that he began to pursue his nihilistic ideals once more. His faith in the new generation`s ability to secure the peace that the old had created possible draining away with each instance of selfish warmongering.
"I would be forever wondering when Sasuke will go down that all too familiar path if attempts at disrupting the peace by others continued."I argue firmly, remembering the results of that very situation, "Besides even if he was never officially released the odds are he wouldn't remain incarcerated forever. Those eyes of his are too valuable for people to ignore him."
Truly, Sasuke had proven himself if nothing else resourceful and Orochimaru, who had an unhealthy obsession with the Uchiha, was currently alive and most importantly free. It was certainly conceivable that the rogue Sannin or some other interested party, like the seemingly infinitely spawning Ōtsutsuki clan, would possible try to free him for their own ends. In short, it was a risk I simply could not afford to make. By killing Sasuke here and now, when he was most vulnerable, it insured that he would never be responsible for damning the world and taking from me what I deem most precious.
"Of course it's hard to escape the possibility that my bias and intense loathing of his future self coloured my judgement." I acknowledge sombrely, reminded of how reckless my decision making was following Asuma`s death at the hands of Hidan and many times today because of my desire for revenge, "His previous crimes certainly warranted punishment, but was I right to execute him without a fair trial to answer for them because of the severe transgressions he was yet to commit?
Yet, thinking back to the moment that my blade met Sasuke`s flesh that blood lust I experienced and never wished to feel again from before was not present. Indeed, I felt more like my more mature professional and less jaded self during the era of peace before Sasuke`s war. My only hypothesis to this being that either by Temari`s support, chance or both that my mergence with my younger self had progressed enough that it was less of a hindrance. Something I proved shortly after through subjecting myself to my most joy filled and harrowing memories.
"Hopefully it won't be too much longer before I can say a goodbye to this troublesome issue." I muse with a sense of monumental relief as I test my darkest memories, the previous pull they had on my psyche considerable less potent and easier to control. "Maybe then I can finally have the future I've longed for without wondering if I would live long enough to enjoy." I allow those joy filled images to envelope me for a moment, glad that I can finally enjoy them without fear. However I soon put a stop to it as my natural cynicism reasserts itself. "Even if it's easier to control now that troublesome pull is still there. Best not push things too far until I know for certain that it won't get worse again."
Still despite that sobering thought it can't be denied that the apparent recovery is helping a great deal in soothing my concerns. Not only for my health but also the motivations behind my actions. The honest truth being that Sasuke`s execution was not driven entirely by my darker desires that I hate so much. "There was definitely a part of me that took a great deal of satisfaction in executing Sasuke." I concede shamefully as I recall those last moments, the idea of taking any pleasure from the deed as disquieting as it was with Hidan, "However, it was not the driving force behind my blade. No I was more concerned with how it would affect the world and my friendship with Naruto. I didn't kill him out of anger. It was simply long overdue justice."
Letting out a long sigh, I try to hold on to that decision and hope that my penchant for over analysing my own actions would finally give me peace. Before it can be tested however, my attention is drawn to a ration bar being casually waved in front of my face before it is deposited on my lap.
"You might be too engrossed in your thoughts to know you're hungry but your stomach wasn't afraid to complain." Temari comments playfully with a shake of the head before sitting next to me and un-wrapping her own wrapper to reveal the dull brown foodstuff that professed to be edible, "The way it was growling I almost mistook you for an Akimichi Shika. Eat up."
Realising that she was absolutely right, the feelings of my empty stomach no longer suppressed by my brooding, I pick up the bar as my face turns crimson. Grateful for her intervention into my troublesome and utterly pointless second guessing of myself, not to mention my notable hunger, I accept the wrapped bar with a grateful nod. Still not wanting to admit my embarrassment all the same, I clear my throat before opening the gray wrapper and replying gruffly between chewy bites, "Troublesome. I`m sure it was just your imagination."
"Whatever you say lazy." Temari replies with a Cheshire grin before grimacing as she bites into her own tasteless bar. A sentiment I would likely share if the quality of the bar wasn't leagues a head of the almost vomit inducing examples we had to endure during our resistance. A thought that reminds me that because of our actions today I would never have to taste those foul things again. A cheering thought that only grows in intensity as I watch Temari grumpily munch through her unwelcome meal and realise that regardless of anything else, Sasuke would never take her from me again.
Still, as we lapse into a comfortable silence I find my mind foolishly retreading the same damnable path of doubt. Not wanting to endure the burden of my own troublesome pessimism and mindful of my promise to Temari in the cave, I ask seriously, "Were we right to kill Sasuke?"
Watching apprehensively from the corner of my eye, I see her go deathly still before she lets out a long sigh and places the remains of her meal to the side. "I thought that was what you were thinking about Shikamaru." She comments after a moment, a mix of sympathy and frustration entering her voice, "Look I know capturing him would have saved us a lot of bother especially…"
Pausing for a moment, she looks sadly at Naruto`s unconscious, "...Especially with regards to Naruto." Fixing me with a pointed look, the sadness leaves her voice as she states resolutely, "However, after everything I've heard about Sasuke, to let him live would have been a gamble we couldn't afford to take. We did the right thing Shikamaru, something that you probable already know but are too critical of yourself to accept."
As I look into her determined and utterly beautiful teal eyes it's hard for me not to throw common sense to the wind and steal a kiss from her inviting lips. Such is her ability to stir my desires and help settle the demons within me. Truly, although I suspect the decision will continue to weigh upon me, the burden on my psyche seems to have lessened considerable. Despite it only being a confirmation of what I already knew, sometimes the validation of a decision by one who you hold in high esteem can make all the difference.
Yet despite my body wanting nothing more than to make my gratitude known in the most primal manner, I take advantage of my regained emotional control to hold back the impulse. The truth being that Temari would not likely want to sully the memory of her first kiss by having it taking place in front of a corpse. "Besides when I do kiss it will be with a complexly clear head."I affirm, hating the idea that my runaway emotions would influence that decision in anyway. "I won't ruin it for her by leaving any doubt as to why I'm doing it. Still I got to say it's going to be a drag trying to keep it in check without the threat to the world hanging over our heads."
Pushing aside my desires, I respond instead with an appreciative chuckle, "Your right. I was trying to reiterate that to myself honestly, but I seemed to be getting sucked into my troublesome habit again." Clasping my left hand on her right, I continue with an embarrassed smile, "I know I've said this a lot recently, but thanks Temari. You always seem to manage to makes things clear to me when I'm being troublesome."
"It's ok Shika, we`re in this together." She affirms with a firm squeeze, a blush upon her cheeks as she continues with barely concealed bashfulness, "Honestly the fact that you always consider the cost of your actions is one of things I always liked about you. Even if it's your own worst enemy at times."
Letting out a small smile at the sight, a flutter passes through me that inspires the same almost magnetic attraction within me. Yet, unlike before I feel myself acting upon the pull as Temari mirrors the actions, appropriateness be damned.
That is until a gravelly voice cuts through the air with a single word that bares so much weight.
"Why?" Comes Naruto`s pain filled question, stopping our progression in an instant as we turn slowly to take in his now conscious form that was staring bleakly at Sasuke`s still cadaver.
I knew this moment would come. Indeed, I steeled myself for this very eventuality and had my words already picked out in order to try and salvage something from the grim affair. Yet as I meet his piercing blue eyes, I find my prepared oration robbed from me. The reality of facing one of my oldest friends betrayed visage proving a more painful scenario than I ever imagined. As such, I avert my craven eyes from his and remain shamefully silent. An act that Temari mirrors before Naruto explosively demands, "Don't you dare ignore me!"
"He deserves to know at least some of my reasons." I affirm determinedly, the ferocity and agony behind his words making me realise how much pain I am causing him by not providing answers, "I only wish I could tell you everything Naruto. Maybe one will be able to too but for now I can only admit so much."
Despite wanting nothing more than to reveal all about the future I came from the fact is that it might prove disastrous. The unfortunate truth being that I feared how someone could gain knowledge of the future through Naruto and abuse that information to threaten the world I hoped to secure. Indeed, in light of the various enemies who excelled in manipulating the mind that would appear in the coming years and Naruto`s weakness to Genjutsu, the risk would simply be too great.
"I might very well have to bring more people into the loop to explain the inconsistencies in my story unfortunately." I mull over irritable, my troublesome father's intuition and some of my plan going awry making it an inevitability at this point, "But the smaller the circle the less chance there is of the worst case scenario occurring." Meeting his burning gaze once more, which still blazes with barely contained anger, I conclude with a bizarre mix of sadness and joy, "As he is now he might never be able to understand, but honestly I'll be glad if it means his idealism won't have to become as tainted as it was in my timeline."
My resolve restored, I let out a weary sigh and focus my mind in an effort to counter my gnawing trepidation at the troublesome encounter to come. Moving to speak, I'm beaten to the punch by a sorrowful Temari. "Naruto we`re sorry, but it had to be done." She offers with guilty hesitation, likely knowing as well as I how unlikely he would be to accept our excuses.
A fact proven almost immediately as he mutters in bitter disbelief, his face grimacing as if the utterance left a vile taste in his mouth, "It had to be done? It was over, he could have been captured and that would have been it but you decided to kill him anyway." Pausing as he takes a heavy intake of air, his face scrunches up in confused frustration before asking searchingly, "You're not cold blooded murderers, so why?"
Suppressing the spark of sorrow I feel at causing him such torment, as well as the implication of his words, I explain with as much calm as I can, "It wasn't murder Naruto, but a sanctioned execution."
"Sanctioned execution?" Naruto questions with evident confusion, his wrath quieting as he seemingly considers my choice of words, "What do you mean?"
"You're not going to like the answer Naruto."I acknowledge with resigned dread as Temari helps me onto my feet and props me against the valley wall, knowing how poorly he would likely take my justification, "Your older self hated dealing with technicalities as Hokage and I'm guessing you won't take kindly to your first troublesome taste of them either."
While agonising on finding a counter to Sasuke`s clone, my mind also touched upon how I would face questions regarding my actions. The issue being that killing Sasuke when he was disabled rather than capturing him to verify his crimes through a trial would be considered an offence in itself.
"The last thing I wanted was for myself, or even worse Temari, to end up imprisoned." I muse grimly while Temari checks on Naruto`s bindings, the thought still unsettling me, "Thankfully, my mergence with younger self hasn't been a complete drag."
Indeed, one of the few advantages of my travel through time is that my memories regarding the events leading up to the war is now clear as day. As such, I can easily recall how the Raikage issued an edict stating that Sasuke was to be killed if possible following his attack on the Five Kage summit. An edict that carried his full authority as leader of the Allied Shinobi Forces and that he hadn't had the time to withdraw after Sasuke sided with the alliance against Madara.
The result being that I or any other Shinobi could still technically execute Sasuke without fear of punishment. A fact that many vengeance seeking Samurai and Kumo-nin tried to take advantage of following the wars conclusion before the Raikage begrudgingly rescinded the edict.
"Besides it's not like Sasuke hasn't done plenty already to warrant the sentence in the Kage`s eyes." I acknowledge with a degree of hope, Sasuke`s long list of crimes in addition to the threat he posed possible being enough to justify our actions to the Kage, "Hopefully they won't be troublesome by digging too deeply into our story. For once your reputation might actually be a good thing Sasuke."
What's important however is that no matter how debatable an excuse at the very least I did have some legal justification for my action. "Too bad Naruto probable won't see things like that." I admit sadly while pulling my eyes away from Naruto`s demanding glare. Knowing there was no way around it, I keep my determined gaze firmly on Naruto despite the likely disdain that would soon be directed at me.
Taking a deep breath, I wearily begin to provide the clarification that could very well end any hope of maintaining our friendship. "Shortly after Sasuke attacked the Five Kage Summit, the Raikage issued an edict." Despite Naruto`s ever intensifying stare I do my best to avoid glancing away from him as Temari finishes her inspection with a satisfied nod , "An edict that was never rescinded and stated that Sasuke was to be executed if possible regardless of the circumstance."
"That's bull and you know it!" Naruto argues back fiercely, his words thick with raw outrage, "Old man Raikage might have a grudge against him; but with everything Sasuke`s did against Madara he wouldn't let it stand."
Suppressing the spark of mirth I feel at the memory of how much the Raikage had dragged his feet over the matter originally, I reply matter-of-factly, "In time he would have perhaps retracted it. However at the time it still stood and given what Sasuke planned to do I doubt the Raikage would have been inclined to withdraw it."
"That doesn't make it right." Naruto retorts angrily, a brief flash of `Sakki` leaking out before the energy is swallowed up by the Chakra seal upon him. Beginning to struggle, a string of muffled profanities uttering forth as Naruto seemingly throws more and more energy into his attempt to fruitlessly break free as he continues hotly, "Sasuke helped me save everyone from Kaguya. He deserved the chance to make amends and stand trial damn it!"
"The chance to make amends?"I muse bitterly while glaring at Sasuke`s corpse as I absently hear Temari say something, recalling with vivid detail the nightmarish results of the second chance bestowed upon him, "He already had one and what did he use it for? To topple everything you stand for Naruto. He already wasted it."
Of course the Naruto of this time doesn't know that. A fact that I have to fight the temptation to rectify as Naruto`s stubborn ignorance begins to wear at me. Holding myself back, knowing that it would probable do little good at the moment anyway, I move to remind Naruto of all of Sasuke `s committed and planned transgressions. However, I stop short when I realise the frantic noise of his struggles is now oddly missing.
Turning my inquisitive gaze back towards Naruto`s now tense body, I try to determine why his features suddenly bare such a great sadness. Following the direction of his regret filled orbs to their source, I zero in on Temari rigid form. "I`ll say it again Naruto."Temari grinds out through gritted teeth, a touch of accusatory anger entering her tone, "Do the people he killed mean nothing to you?"
"Temari I…." Naruto mumbles weakly before trailing off, seemingly unable to muster a response under Temari`s withering glare. A reaction that only apparently serves to increase Temari`s agitation further as she continues with seething hostility, "Those Samurai and Kumo- nin he killed had friends and families. Think of all the people he has hurt both directly and indirectly by cutting short their loved ones lives."
Pointing one hand at Sasuke`s body as the other grips her fan tightly, she exclaims, "Your so called friend wanted nothing more than to kill you, my brother as well as the woman I've heard you affectionately call `Granny`." Shaking her head in sombre disbelief as I hobble painfully towards them, Temari glares hatefully at Sasukes corpse as she questions with now unconcealed wrath, "And you know what's worse? When he beat that Kaguya woman and had the chance to put it all behind him his only thought was plunge the world into a fresh hell."
Tearing her burning gaze away from Sasuke, she fixes Naruto`s guilt ridden visage with a scornful glare as she accuses, "How can you say he deserved the chance to make amends after everything he has done and so mercilessly planned to do in order to hurt you and countless others? How Naruto!"
"Temari." I interject with sad concern as I shuffle along beside Temari and place a comforting hand on her tense shoulder, a pang of guilt flaring up within me. The fact being that my recounting of the future likely played a large part in fuelling the intense outrage that sprung forth as a result of that burden. Feeling her muscles relax at my touch, I sooth diplomatically, "You have every right to feel the way you do given what he wanted to do. But Naruto isn't Sasuke, his motives however misguided are at least in the right place and getting angry at him won't help anything." I Spare a glance at Naruto whose resigned sorrow tells me all I need to know, "Besides I think he understands all too well why you feel this way."
Letting out a shaky breath as she regards Naruto guiltily, the anger bleeds from her tone as she concedes wearily, "Your right Shika." Turning her attention to Naruto, she smiles fondly, "I can't state how grateful I am for everything you did for Gaara. Believe me I know that if it wasn't for your seemingly limitless capacity for forgiveness and understanding that I might never have gotten my little brother back."
Becoming grim the smile slips from Temari`s face, her voice solemn, "I'm sorry I reacted that way, but you have to understand that you've touched the lives of so many people including ours. You have no idea how hard your death would affect people Naruto. I guess I couldn't stand hearing you defend Sasuke when you and so many I care for would likely be dead right now because of him."
Regarding us both Naruto asks solemnly, "I'm guessing you feel the same way Shikamaru?"
"I do Naruto." I agree with a sombre nod, wishing that it hadn't come to this, "The world would be a worse place without you and frankly I wasn't willing to take the chance that Sasuke would one day make good on his threats. Im Sorry it had to be this way."
Sighing gravely he responds, his remorse laden tone and sad eyes making it clear that he hated having to argue with us as much as we did, "I get it, I really do. As much as I wish it wasn't, I know he had done some terrible things and honestly when he talked about his plan I felt sick. But, what made him that way was the same cycle of hatred and conflict that's been hurting the world since old man sage's day."
Scrunching up his face as if he was trying to recall something important, he continues hesitantly , "I don't know how, but I got to meet the sage six paths after I almost died fighting Madara. I didn't understand it all, but he basically told me that for the cycle to end people had to learn to let go of their hatred or the same things will keep happening."
Fixing us with a determined stare, Naruto affirms, "I know it won't be easy, but someone has to be the one to make the first step. Now that Sasuke is de….." Pausing for a moment as he looks sadly at his former friends body, Naruto seemingly takes a moment to settle his emotions as continues with strained calm, "…..Now that's he`s gone Sasuke can never make up for everything he did. I have to believe that people like Sasuke can change or else old man sages dream will never be able to happen."
Voice breaking a little as his grief and sadness begin to erode his emotional control, Naruto demands sorrowfully, tears running down his whiskered cheeks, "Don't you see that by not letting Sasuke redeem himself you justified all that crap he was saying!"
"Naruto…."Temari mumbles remorsefully, likely sharing my regret that things had to be this way. No matter how much we wished it wasn't the case we both know that an ideal sometimes has to be broken to defend its very existence. Indeed, although we agree in spirit with everything Naruto is saying the unfortunate truth is that some people are simple irredeemable and have to be removed for the greater good.
"I'm truly sorry Naruto." I begin regretfully, turning my gaze away from the despair filled orbs that cut deeply into my resolve. Forcing such weakness away, I drain myself of those traitorous emotions that threaten to spill forth and state resolutely, "It's a nice ideal, but not everyone can be saved. Sometimes people like Sasuke will have to be removed before they selfishly tear everything down. Only then can the peace be secured Naruto."
A deathly silence follows for a moment before Naruto`s disappointed response reaches my ears. A response that carries with it a deep sense of betrayal, disillusionment and regret that confirms my earlier fears. "I….I don't think I can ever accept that." Naruto mumbles mournfully, likely saddened as I that we had reached this impasse.
"No."I comment ruefully as I motion to sit back down, knowing that our friendship will never be what it once was, "I don't think you will either."