Lexie stood in the doorway just watching her parents, a wide smile spreading across her face as she tugged Jake close to her. This was just like her stories. She thought about going in but then stopped, she felt like she shouldn't go in, that she should just leave them for just now.
Glancing up again to check that they hadn't noticed her, Lexie turned and snuck as quietly as she could down the hallway. Moving up to the second step of the stairs, she ran on the spot for a few seconds before jumping onto the floor and speeding down the hall, smiling triumphantly to herself, they'd never know she'd seen anything, and she could tell Abby, and Abby would know what to do.
As she raced into the kitchen she saw that her mom and dad were now sitting further apart, although they both had weird smiles on their faces, and her mom's cheeks were all red.
They both looked up as Lexie ran into the room, and bounded onto her dad's legs, causing a small, "Oomph," to escape his lips.
A small, sly smile tugging at her lips, Lexie asked, "What you doing?"
Jenny leaned forward and tickled her daughter under the chin, "We were just talking about you," she replied, unable to meet Jethro's watchful gaze. She'd jumped away from him as if she'd been scalded when she'd heard Lexie thundering down the stairs.
"Hmmm," was the suspicious sounding reply she got, along with a quirked eyebrow. She glanced down at the albums on the table, "Have you started looking at my photos yet?"
"No," Gibbs replied, hugging her tightly, "We thought we'd wait for the guest of honour."
"Well I'm here now," Lexie replied happily, as she tugged her baby book towards her, and snuggled closer into her dad's arms.
Standing at the kitchen sink, Gibbs stared out into his back garden with unseeing eyes, his mind racing. He was alone for the moment, Lexie having decided that she wanted Jenny to read her bed time story tonight, therefore giving him a chance to think over the events of the afternoon.
He hadn't really thought through what kissing Jenny would mean, he hadn't thought about anything other than the fact that he just had to kiss her, it hadn't so much been a choice as a necessity. But now……he let out a heavy sigh, now he realised that things were even more complicated than before.
He frowned as he considered that thought. Maybe, just maybe it wouldn't complicate things, he still loved Jenny, seeing her again had brought back just how much it had hurt him when she left, and he didn't want to go through that again. And he knew that she'd felt something from the way she'd reacted. They had feelings for each other, that was for sure, and if they gave their feelings a chance then he knew that they could make it work, and then they could be a real family, and he wouldn't even have to consider the possibility of living thousands of miles away from both her and Lexie, and he didn't see why that couldn't happen.
Jenny placed the closed book on the small, white bedside table and then turned to tuck the covers around Lexie's small figure, trying to ignore the pulse that was beginning to drum against her forehead. She smiled at her daughter and kissed her forehead, brushing a curl away from her face. Lexie gave her sleepy smile, then, after trying to stifle a yawn, she asked sweetly, "Mommy, do you love Daddy?"
Jenny froze, her hand slipping off the duvet. Forcing her face into an over bright smile, she asked, "Of course I do. What makes you ask that?"
Lexie took a deep breath - she was just going to ask her Mom, they'd kissed, and if people kissed then they had to get married, it was a rule. Squeezing Jake's arm tightly, she asked, "Then why aren't you married?"
At that, Jenny's eyes shot into her hairline. Stuttering for a moment, she finally forced out, "It's a different kind of love."
Lexie's brow crinkled "I don't get it."
"Well," Jenny replied, feeling on a more even footing. "There are lots of different types of love, and to get married to someone you have to be in a very special kind of love. And that kind of love just doesn't happen, so yes I love your dad, but I'm not going to marry him, it's not that kind of love," she finished somewhat lamely, her pulse racing.
"But….." Lexie tailed off, frustrated. She didn't think she should mention that they saw them kissing, but she didn't understand why they would kiss if they didn't want to get married. She frowned up at her mom, and tried again, "But if you get married, then we can stay here, with Daddy - forever."
Jenny wanted the ground to swallow her whole at that moment, this was exactly what she hadn't wanted, she didn't want Lexie to pin her hopes on a fairytale ending, although she was only four so she really should have seen it coming. Stroking her daughter's cheek, she told her, "Sweetheart, I know that you want your Dad to be able to live with us, but he just can't, we live in L.A. that's where I work, and your Dad works here and that isn't going to change."
"Why can't one of you switch jobs?"
"We just can't."
"If you really wanted to you could."
Lexie watched as her mom shook her head slowly, replying, "It just doesn't work like that, when your older you'll understand."
"No, I won't," Lexie declared, turning onto her side to signify that she was finished with the conversation.
Letting out a heavy sigh, Jenny kissed Lexie's cheek one more time, the getting up from the bed she flicked out the light, saying softly, "Goodnight, Lex." Trying not to let the returning silence bother her too much.
Shutting the bedroom door behind her, she leaned against the wall, running her hands through her hair, trying to reign in her feelings. She had lied to her daughter, something she never thought she'd do, she'd skirted the issue before, but she'd never lied. She did love Jethro, she loved him so much that sometimes it physically hurt not to be with him, but it just couldn't happen, no matter how much she wanted it, it was complicated enough when it had just been the two of them, but with Lexie stuck in the middle it was damn right impossible. It wouldn't be fair to get Lexie's hopes up, only to have them brutally dashed, it would devastate her, and Jenny just wouldn't do that to her, she couldn't.
Leaning against the counter, Gibbs watched as a tense looking Jenny walked into the kitchen. Frowning, he asked, "Is everything Ok?"
Jenny forced a smile. "Of course," she replied, sinking down into one of the chairs at the table.
Moving forward, Gibbs stood behind her, placing his hands onto her shoulders, his frown deepening as her muscles tensed further still. Curling his fingers, he began to knead gently at the knots. He allowed himself a smug smile as Jenny's head fell backwards, a throaty murmur of approval eking out from behind her tightly clenched teeth. Then, just as he thought she was beginning to loosen up slightly, she jerked away from his hands and abruptly stood up from the table. "Don't," she told him, rubbing at her temples.
His hands falling to his sides, he asked, "Jen, what's going on?"
She shook her head, "We can't do this, it isn't fair."
Keeping his voice steady, and trying to hide his confusion, he asked, "Not fair on who?"
"On Lexie, if she sees us acting like us then she'll get her hopes up, she'll think that we're going to play happy families. It's going to be hard enough on her when things go back to the way they were before."
"The way they were before," Gibbs echoed. He shook his head, "Jenny, things are never going to be like they were before. Before I wasn't even a consideration in her life, now I'm going to be involved, even if I have to move heaven and earth to do it. Things are going to change whether you like it or not. We have feeling for each other, why fight it?"
"Because it won't last."
"Says who?"
"I do. I have to go back, my career's in L.A."
Gibbs wasn't quite sure how to answer that, he knew one wrong answer and he'd be back to stage one, and possibly be even worse off than that. Tilting his head to the side, he studied her, she was confused, something he'd never seen in her before. She needed time, time to realise that what was best for all of them was to be together, completely disregarding her last remark, he moved closer to her, his fingers curling around her arms, thumbs stroking at the skin of her bare arms. "You're right about Lexie," he conceded. "We shouldn't get her hopes up, but that doesn't mean that we shouldn't give us a chance, we'll just keep it quiet."
"But it won't work," Jenny whispered.
"Why?"
"My career.."
Gibbs shook his head, sliding his hands up to cup her face, "Forget about that for just now, that's something we can deal with later. Just for once, lets put ourselves first, if it works then we'll deal with all the ins and outs."
Jenny looked up, loosing herself in that piercing blue gaze. She knew that this wasn't a good idea, but she wanted this so badly, if only just for a short while, she wanted to be back with him. Leaning forward into his embrace, she gave a small nod, her head pounding, her pulse echoing in her forehead.
Gibbs gave a small smile against her hair, his hand sliding across her back, he felt the residual tension, and asked, "Headache?"
Again he felt a small nod against his chest. "That's not why you agreed to this, is it?" he joked weakly.
Jenny pulled back from him slightly, and gave him a small smile, her hand sliding up his cheek. "No," she replied, before wincing slightly at the pain in her temples.
Tugging at her hand, Gibbs pulled her towards the doorway, at her confused gaze, he told her, "Come on, I'm running you a bath." Leading her up into the bathroom, he sat her down on the closed over toilet seat, and hit the hot tap on, before pouring liberal amounts of Lexie's bubble bath in. He looked over at Jenny who - despite the obvious pain she was in - had managed to raise an eyebrow. He shrugged, "Only thing I've got, I'm not really a bubble bath kind of guy."
"You don't say."
Letting out a small chuckle, Gibbs stood up. "Be back in a minute," he told her, before disappearing out of the room.
As soon as he was gone, Jenny let her head fall against the wall to her left, the sound of the running water felt as though it was cutting through her. Her head still felt so fuzzy, half the time she wasn't sure of how she felt or what she should do for the best, and confusion was not a feeling she was familiar with. She'd always known what she wanted, and how she should go about it, whereas right now the only thing she knew was that she wanted to be with Jethro, and she didn't want to fight it, even though she'd tried. She'd just have to deal with the consequences of this later, she gave a small snort, that was one thing she was getting good at, dealing with the consequences. Maybe that was selfish of her, but right now it was what she needed.
She glanced up as she heard his footsteps approaching again. He knelt down in front of her, a glass of water and her heavy duty painkillers in his hand. She took them gratefully, gulping them down, placing the empty glass on the sink next to them. Closing her eyes again she attempted to will away the pain, as she felt Jethro pull her gently to her feet, undoing her shirt's buttons. "You Ok?" he asked, and she nodded, knowing that he was mainly referring to him undressing her.
"Nothing you haven't seen before," she mumbled.
Gibbs didn't reply as he spotted the healing scar across her side, and instead placed a small kiss to her bare shoulder, his hands running over her sides before unfastening the button of her pants, and shimmying those and her panties down her long legs. He nodded towards the bath, "In."
Opening her eyes, Jenny slid into the warm water, letting it wash over her, the heat and steam seeping through her pores. The pain in her head moving down a notch as Jethro turned off the taps. She closed her eyes again, although she remained cognizant of him moving around the room. At a familiar noise she leaned forward and let him slip in behind her, smiling at the memories of time spent together in the past. She leant back against his firm chest, her fingers digging into his knee as he pushed the tips of his fingers into the knot at the back of her neck, a whimper escaping from her.
"It'll help, just give it a minute," he informed her somewhat gruffly, hating the fact that he was making the pain worse, even if it was only for a short while.
After a few moments, Jenny felt the pain ease slightly and she slumped against Gibbs, totally exhausted. Her eyes still closed, she turned her head and brushed a soft kiss against his jaw line, "Thank you," she whispered. He didn't reply, just wrapped his arms tightly around her, his fingers tracing circles on her sides.
They stayed like that for over half an hour, the water slowly cooling around them as Jenny dozed. Eventually the water got cool enough that Gibbs gave her a slight shake, not wanting her to catch a chill. "Jen, come on, bedtime."
She nodded sleepily, and stumbled slightly as she stepped out of the bath, letting him wrap a large towel around her. He ran the towel lightly over skin, drying her, before tugging a cool cotton t-shirt over her head, and leading her into the bedroom.
Lying down on the cool sheets, Jenny sighed happily, the painkillers had started to take effect, but they had the disadvantage of making her head even fuzzier. Cracking one eye open, she patted the space next to her. "Come in," she mumbled.
Gibbs didn't even hesitate, he didn't want to leave her alone like this, not when she was in so much pain. Shifting behind her, he pulled her flush against him, watching her closely as she drifted back to sleep. Leaning his forehead against the back of her head, he felt some relief wash over him, she was giving him a chance, and she was letting him take care of her, something that she had always struggled with. He breathed in the scent of her damp hair, he wasn't going to screw this up, he was going to convince her that this was what was best for all of them and what she really wanted, even if she was still trying to deny it, because as much as she tried to hide it, her eyes just couldn't lie to him.
A/N: I know that Jenny might be acting a bit strangely at moment, and that normally she wouldn't have a problem sticking to her decisions but at this moment in time she's still recovering from a serious head injury, and that has hit her for six. So at times she might do things that don't seem quite like her, although hopefully I'm getting across that point in the story and you're not just all silently despairing.
Anyway let me know your thoughts :)
xxx