Disclaimer: All characters and things associated with The Twilight Saga belong to Stephanie Meyers and Summit Entertainment. This writing is for pure entertainment only.
Summary: First in my own series set after Breaking Dawn. Set seven years after Breaking Dawn. After unforeseen circumstances, Renesmee Cullen is gone, but can her family bring her back and does she even want to be found?
CHAPTER 20
Edward carried Renesmee's feverish body onto the private plan that Jasper had been able to secure through a few phone calls and favors for them all. The rest of the Cullen's and wolf pack were behind the father with his child.
It killed Jacob to not be the one holding Renesmee, but his body temperature was only making her fever worse; the Cullen's cold touch was the only thing Renesmee, in her delirious state, seemed to want.
The Cullen family and pack got settled on the plan in complete silence; all seemed numbed by Renesmee's worsening condition.
Edward gently placed Renesmee in the seat between Bella and himself. Jacob filed in the seat across the aisle from them, tensely watching Renesmee's body shiver and sweat at the same time.
"She looks worse…" Rosalie commented from her seat behind Bella.
Bella turned and glared at Rosalie before gently stroking Renesmee's cheek.
Renesmee growled but her eyes did not open.
"Why is this happening to her?" Seth asked, glancing toward Carlisle.
Carlisle just shook his heat from his seat in front of Renesmee. He had his theories, but he would not share them with the family; there was no point in worrying everyone more until he could solidly confirm something. "I don't know…"
"We should have never given her that crap." Jacob punched the seat in front of him in frustration.
"It wasn't our choice…" Emmett reminded him, although he could not look Jacob in the eye, instead he stared down at his huge hang clasped tightly around Rosalie's.
"We could have stopped her." Jacob growled.
"She would have done it anyway, Jake." Leah spoke up from her seat next to Jacob, gently placing a hand on his shoulder to calm him down. "You know Ness…once she gets an idea in her head its impossible to stop her."
"And you couldn't have known this is what was going to happen." Esme also tried to comfort Jacob. She had watched Jacob for years with Renesmee and she knew, as much as it pained everyone to see Renesmee in such a fragile state, it killed Jacob.
Jacob shook his head. "I could have guessed…"
"Jake…" Renesmee mumbled, though her eyes were closed tightly.
"Jacob…" Bella glared, warning her werewolf friend to lower his voice. She could tell that, even in Renesmee's half conscious state, she could hear the worry in Jacob's voice and she was trying to comfort him.
Jacob just looked away, his hands in a tight fist.
"Bella…" Edward spoke gently now, softly placing his hand over hers, the one she had placed gently on Renesmee's cheek. "Jacob is only worried about her."
"I know." Bella said, truthfully as her eyes fell to her weakening daughter. "So am I."
"I hate to interrupt but…we need to keep her cool." Carlisle spoke over the seat. "Her temperature is far too high…"
Bella nodded, gently pulling Renesmee up close to her and wrapping both of her arms around her child, her cold skin lowering the fire burning through Renesmee's body.
Jacob could not watch the sight in front of him anymore; he could not watch Renesmee deteriorate in front of him. He stood, quickly moving to the back of the plane.
Alice stood motioning to Jasper to come with her. Everyone else had been focused on Renesmee, no one had even see Jacob move. Alice thought she could talk to him, and that Jasper would be able to calm him down; to get him to focus.
Jacob sat in the back row of the small private jet, tucked tightly against the window. He could not watch Renesmee suffer any longer; not when he knew he had played some part in whatever was happening to his imprint right now.
Jacob heard Alice and Jasper approach him but did not bother to look at either of them. "Go away."
"You know that is not in my nature, Jacob Black." Alice plopped herself down next to him, as Jasper took a seat next to her, trying his best to control Jacob's emotions and keep the werewolf calm.
Jacob just rolled his eyes but said nothing else to the vampires seated next to him, knowing that Alice would only leave when she was good and ready to.
"It's not your fault, Jacob…" Alice started.
Jacob closed his eyes and shook his head, though he could not feel the frustration and anger that had plagued him moments earlier. He knew Jasper was to account for that and in a way he was happy; he would rather feel numb than anything. "Please just…don't…"
"Jacob. You could not control what happened here. If anything, you kept Renesmee safe…" Alice continued.
"Safe?" Jacob cut her off, feeling anger despite Jasper's best efforts. "I practically allowed her to kill herself…" He motioned to the front of the plan, where a deteriorating Renesmee sat wrapped tightly in Bella's arms.
"You didn't let her die." Alice told Jacob. "If anything, you made sure she didn't. There was no way any of us would have survived had you and you pack not shown up today."
Jacob just shook his head. He did not want to listen to Alice tell him all the reasons he was a hero; not when Renesmee was dying a few feet from him.
Alice through her hands up in frustration. "Well I tried." She stood and moved past Jasper, surprised when he did not get up to follow her. She glanced at Jasper and he just nodded, motioning for her to move back to the front of the plane. She smiled down at him and nodded back before leaving Jasper and Jacob alone.
"You're angry…" Jasper spoke up after a moment of silence. "I can tell. I can feel it coming off of you in waves."
"You think?" Jacob glared at Jasper.
"Are you angry with Renesmee or yourself?" Jasper asked.
"Me…both…I don't know…" Jacob sighed.
"It's okay to be angry with Renesmee. What she did was stupid…" Jasper told him.
"It's not okay to be angry if she dies." Jacob's eyes were glued to the seat in front of him.
"I highly doubt Carlisle would let that happen." Jasper told him.
"He may not be able to control that." Jacob glanced at Jasper, his brown eyes sad.
"I know how you feel about Renesmee…" Jasper said after a moment. "It's how I feel about Alice. It's how Edward feels about Bella…"
"Yeah…" Jacob nodded in agreement. "Maybe more."
"Maybe." Jasper nodded in agreement. "And so I can't imagine what it must feel like to even have to think about losing her…"
"There isn't much to think about." Jacob said. "If anything happens to her…well I won't be far behind her."
"I understand." Jasper nodded, and he did understand. He could not envision a world without Alice. He would follow Alice anywhere, even if that meant to death; he could only assume Jacob would do the same for Renesmee.
"It doesn't scare me." Jacob said after another moment. "If that's what you think. Death…it doesn't scare me."
"I didn't think it did." Jasper said. "Although, you seem scared."
"For her." Jacob motioned to Renesmee in the front of the plane. "She has barely gotten a chance to live. And it's not like her life has been that easy…I thought…maybe now…" He shook his head.
"Now what?" Jasper asked.
"Now that…that it might be easier for her. With you all back." Jacob explained. "But now everything just seems so screwed up. I mean…she may not even make it back to Forks, let alone back there to live…"
"You really think that?" Jasper asked.
"Oh come on…like you can't feel it coming off of her. She is dying. I can feel it…" Jacob sounded defeated.
"I can feel that." Jasper spoke honestly. "What I can't get is why you would rather spend your time back here than with her. Especially now."
Jacob nodded after a moment. "Thanks…" He knew why Jasper had come back there and he was grateful the vampire had been able to show him what was important; Renesmee. Jacob stood and made his way back to the front of the plane with Jasper a step behind him.
Bella could feel Renesmee's heartbeat now; it had picked up, but it was much too fast and sounded like it was working much too hard. She glanced down to see the sweat pouring off Renesmee's face and yet her daughter shivered with fever. Bella kissed the top of Renesmee's head and pulled her even closer to her own cold body, still trying to counteract the fever.
"Her heartbeat started up…" Bella glanced over at Edward and then at Carlisle who was now sitting across from them. Both men nodded in acknowledgment but would not look at Bella or Renesmee.
It was clear to both father and son that the child was close to death. Both Edward and Carlisle knew Renesmee's heart was beating much too fast and her temperature just continued to rise. Carlisle was no longer sure if Renesmee would even make it into the states, let alone to Washington.
Finally Edward glanced at Bella, placing his hand on her shoulder. He hated to see Bella get so reattached to Renesmee now; now when they could lose her again just as easily. He had watched her try her best to get over losing Renesmee originally and had known the pain it had caused her; he could not envision Bella going through that all again and making it out intact this time.
"Bella…" Edward whispered. "Maybe I should hold her for a bit?"
Bella glared at Edward, knowing exactly what he was doing. "I am not giving her up now. It's too late…I am attached…" She glanced down lovingly at Renesmee who looks so silly wrapped in Bella's grasp, being the same size as her mother.
Edward closed his eyes. He could not imagine losing his daughter either, but he would not lose Bella and Renesmee. He had to save one of them; he needed one of them to survive, he needed Bella to still be his reason to exist. "Bella…if she doesn't…"
"She will make it." Bella cut her husband off quickly. Before lowering her head and kissing Renesmee's forehead before whispering to her child. "Won't you, sweetie? You're stronger then this…"
Renesmee did not respond except for a slight moan. It was easy to see she was in pain now and it killed Bella to see her child like this.
"How is she doing?" Jacob appeared in the aisle with Jasper a step behind him.
"Same as before." Carlisle sighed.
Jacob glanced at Renesmee and could immediately tell Carlisle was lying. She looked worse than before.
"How much longer is the ride?" Emmett spoke up from his seat behind Bella.
"Another hour to New York…" Edward spoke up, mechanically.
"This is taking too long…" Jacob seemed angry again.
Renesmee shifted at Jacob's voice, letting out a long sigh of pain. Bella moved to try and make her daughter comfortable when suddenly Renesmee lunged up, her eyes flinging open as she cried out in pain.
"Ness?" Jacob moved to his knees so he could see Renesmee's face.
Carlisle also moved, helping Bella hold Renesmee still as she twitched, the veins in her neck popping out.
"Her eyes…" Jacob noticed that Renesmee's eyes were no longer crimson but instead a mud-red color; as if they were somewhere between red and brown.
Carlisle nodded, but focused on Renesmee. "Hold her still, Bella. This will pass."
Bella just nodded, mechanically and watched as her hands held her daughter, although she could not seem to process her own actions. It was as if she were detached from her body. Seeing Renesmee in so much pain was heartbreaking.
Carlisle was right though, and after a long minute, Renesmee slumped back into Bella's arms, as if her body had worn itself out.
"What the hell was that?" Leah was the first to break the tense silence that now filled the void of Renesmee's trashing and screaming from moments earlier.
Carlisle sighed, as if he wanted to say something but chose not to. "I am not sure…"
Edward stared at his father, noticing that Carlisle was carefully blocking his thoughts from his son. Edward assumed this meant that Carlisle knew more then he wanted them to know right now. Edward was not angry with Carlisle for this, if anything he was glad that, if Carlisle thought Renesmee's condition was far worse than it was, that he was keeping it to himself and not upsetting Bella anymore then she clearly already was.
"It could be good though?" Jacob suddenly sounded hopefully. "Her eyes…they were a mix of brown and red…maybe it means she is changing back?"
"It could…" Carlisle sighed again, although his voice did not sound too convincing. It was clear, at least to Edward, that Carlisle did not agree with Jacob's statement.
Renesmee had made it back to Washington, after an excruciating plane ride from New York to Seattle. Her eyes were no longer the same mud color they had been earlier; now they appeared to be almost orange and it had frightened everyone when she had lunged out of Bella's arms, scratching at her own neck before falling unconscious somewhere over Colorado. Since then, she had not responded to anything.
The only indication Renesmee was even alive anymore was her faint heartbeat and her shallow breathing; both things Bella constantly kept checking as she carried Renesmee from Emmett's jeep and up the stairs to the Cullen house with Edward, Jacob, and Carlisle two steps behind her.
Esme, Emmett, Rosalie, Alice, Jasper, Seth, Embry, and Leah all stood outside on the steps for a moment.
"Why don't you guys head back home?" Jasper looked to the wolf-pack. "Let Sam know everything that happened."
"Sure." Embry nodded, for once completely agreeing with a vampire. He was too tired and drained to watch Renesmee struggle anymore.
"Do you want us to come back?" Seth asked.
"No. We'll…let you guys know how it goes. No reason to have everyone here upset." Jasper said.
"I am not leaving." Leah stepped up. "Renesmee is my best friend and I am not leaving. Not right now, not until someone makes me."
"No one is going to make you." Esme sensed Leah's hostility. "Of course you are welcome to stay."
Leah relaxed a bit. "Thanks."
"Well…let us know…" Seth motioned to Embry to follow him in the woods.
"I can't believe how bad Renesmee looks…" Rosalie seemed to kick dirt off their front steps. "I mean…she has just deteriorated…"
"Why would she do this to herself?" Esme asked, glancing up at the house where Renesmee was.
"She thought she was doing the right thing." Emmett defended his niece. "And I mean…it worked…"
"She is practically dying…" Leah cut in, folding her arms across her chest.
"Yeah…but we got everyone back from Italy alive." Emmett grinned slightly, almost a sad grin.
"And Jane is dead." Jasper added.
"So…if nothing else, she accomplished what she wanted." Emmett said.
Alice glared, giving Emmett a slight punch to the gut. "That is our niece you are talking about!"
"I know." Emmett looked up at the house. "And I don't want a damn thing to happen to her. Don't take what I said the wrong way. It's just…I kinda got to know her the past few days and I mean…she accomplished what she wanted to, and that was the important thing to her…if something were to happen she would know she did everything she wanted to…"
"Nothing is going to happen." Esme emphasized.
"Come on…you saw her. You saw Carlisle! He has no clue what to do…" Emmett said, suddenly realizing exactly what was probably going to happen to his niece.
"He will figure it out." Rosalie said. "He has to."
"What if he can't?" Leah suddenly spoke up, realizing her best friend may die. She couldn't lose Renesmee. "I mean…what are the other options?"
"What are you talking about? We have no options…" Jasper said, confused.
"We could turn her." Emmett said immediately, realizing what Leah was getting at.
"Bella would never let us do that…" Alice spoke up. "You saw how she reacted when she thought Renesmee was a vampire in Italy. It would kill her to see Renesmee get turned."
"It would kill her more if Renesmee died." Rosalie was suddenly on board with Emmett and Leah.
"Exactly…" Emmett nodded.
"This is not our decision to make." Esme spoke up, unable to believe her children were even talking in such a way. "What Bella and Edward decide to do is up to them."
"So what? We are just supposed to stand around and do nothing?" Emmett threw his hands out.
"That is exactly what we are supposed to do." Esme said. "Carlisle will handle it."
"Yeah…last time Carlisle handled it we all ended up thinking Renesmee was dead." Emmett said through a clenched door before storming into the house. He loved his niece, more than his own undead life. He couldn't imagine just letting her slip away. Not after he had gotten the chance to know her a little.
"Emmett!" Rosalie followed after her soul mate, able to tell he was upset.
Esme took a deep breath. Emmett had taken a low blow at her.
"He is just upset."Jasper told Esme, able to feel her hurt and Emmett's anger.
"We all are." Leah said, following Emmett into the house.
"She's upset to." Jasper motioned to Leah.
"They have every right to be." Esme said after a moment.
"Maybe we should…just go inside." Alice said, after a moment, feeling bad for Esme.
Esme nodded and followed Alice and Jasper into the house.
Bella carefully and swiftly carried Renesmee into Carlisle's office with Jacob, Edward, and Carlisle mere steps behind her.
"Put her on the desk." Carlisle ordered, throwing all of the paperwork off his desk.
Bella nodded and gently placed Renesmee down in the same way she used to when Renesmee was a newborn and Bella was placing her in her crib.
"Can you help her?" Jacob asked.
"I'm going to try." Carlisle was already over Renesmee with needle. "I need a blood sample." He quickly cleaned a spot on Renesmee's neck, where her vein was now popping out, and stuck his needle in, extracting a blood sample.
"What the hell is that?" Edward was horrified as he saw Renesmee's blood was the color of charcoal.
"Her…blood…" Carlisle stared at the blood, swallowing hard.
"Why…why is it that color?" Bella pushed her hair off her face before moving closer to Renesmee, clasping her hand tightly on her daughter's limp hand.
"I just…I need to run some tests…" Carlisle said quickly, trying to keep his thoughts from Edward until he could be certain.
Edward was frustrated now; mad Carlisle was trying to keep his thoughts to himself. "Stop hiding it from me, damn it!" Edward growled and stepped forward. "She is my daughter! Stop hiding whatever you are hiding from me!" He was practically in Carlisle's face right now.
Bella stood, horrified at Edward's anger as she watched Jacob move past her and grab Edward.
"Easy, Edward. That isn't going to help…" Jacob pulled Edward back.
Edward glanced at Jacob and was immediately ashamed as he could see Jacob's calm demeanor. For once Jacob was not the one who needed restraining because of his temper.
We need him to help her before we get mad. Jacob thought as he stared at Edward. We need to have clear heads right now…all of us.
Edward nodded at Jacob, understanding Jacob's point of view completely. He knew Jacob was right.
By the time Edward had calmed down, Carlisle was finished running his tests on Renesmee and her blood. He turned to Edward, Jacob, and Bella.
"What is it?" Bella grew anxious as she saw the look of sadness on Carlisle's face. Her grip on Renesmee's hand tightened.
"It's exactly what I thought." Carlisle shook his head. "The venom…it poisoned her."
"What?" Jacob's face grew white.
"Poisoned?" Bella was horrified, feeling her entire body go numb as she glanced down at her beautiful daughter; her daughter who was now dying. "How?"
"She was born non-venomous." Carlisle said. "I always wondered why…"
"There was a reason for it." Edward could hear Carlisle's thoughts now. "Her body isn't meant to hold vampire venom."
"No." Carlisle shook his head. "I don't think it is."
"So when she injected herself with it…she poisoned herself." Edward was now making a statement, his voice thick with acid as he tried to restrain himself from shaking with anger and disgust. "Our venom…my…my venom is killing her…" He glanced down at Renesmee.
"Yes…" Carlisle's voice was soft.
"There has to be something we can do…" Bella pleaded, knowing she would have been crying if she could. She gently stroked Renesmee's hair, listening to her daughter's shallow breathing.
"It's in her bloodstream…the damage could be irreversible…" Carlisle scrambled for a solution in his head.
"Well we need to figure it out. We need to get it out of her!" Jacob's calm demeanor was gone now. He would not lose his Renesmee. "Damn it! Figure it out!"
"I'm trying, Jacob!" Carlisle, for the first time in centuries, was panicking; nervous he would not be able to save his granddaughter.
Carlisle's shaking voice drew silence from Bella, Edward, and Jacob. None of them had seen Carlisle in such distress before; his behavior alone made them realize just how dire the situation was. Renesmee was dying and there may not be any way to save her.