Chapter 20 – Does this darkness have a name?
Meghan woke up in darkness. Her body ached and felt weak, she didn't know if she could sit up straight. She was staring at a beige 'ceiling' made out of old cotton. Or so she thought. She heard someone cough outside and tried to lift her head. She supported herself with her elbows and groaned. She was laying in a tent. As a reaction to her groaning someone opened the tent and a huge amount of light came in. Meghan closed her eyes after which she slowly tried to get used to the light but the tent was already closed. She saw the familiar face of Roran. She blinked her eyes in confusion.
"There you are again." He said while he smiled for a moment.
"What.." before she could finish her question Roran gestured that she should stay down.
"Not much later after we said goodbye we say your horse along the way, apparently he walked back, smart horse you've got."
"But why?"
"Why? You were completely unconscious for the past two days. I don't know what happened to you bt.." he stopped talking and gave Meghan some time to think. Then she nodded slowly.
"So Storm walked back?" she asked surprised, Roran nodded.
"Nedda found you and Storm and brought you here. Almost the entire village wanted to wait for you to get better, or at least wake up..so that's why we're here."
"I'm fine." Meghan said, she appreciated that all these people cared for her. She saw that Roran didn't believe she was okay and that he didn't want her to know.
"Of course." He said. "Well, you can freshen up, I'll see you outside.."
He left the tent and the beam of light that came through the opening hurt her eyes. In the corner there was some cold water, so she washed her face after which she braided her hair and went outside.
Her eyes had to get used to that much light but they adjusted quickly enough. The whole group was busy, making themselves ready for traveling.
"I think it's best if you travel with us for today, we're taking a detour that goes about the direction you have to take..so it will not slow you down"
"A detour?" Meghan asked abrupt.
"We can't risk getting too close to the king's men." Meghan was shocked.
"They're here too?" she asked scared.
Roran nodded. "They're everywhere."
Meghan felt at ease within the group, she wasn't as lonely and was distracted from her thoughts. They walked mostly, some children or wome sat on horses or other cattle.
"What's she like?" Meghan asked when the silence wasn't bearable anymore.
Roran looked up grom his thoughts. Although he had known she was walking beside him he was surprised she spoke to him.
"Her name's Katrina." His voice was soft and Meghan could see he was thinking of her. "She's sweet, incredibly sweet. And pretty and funny and smart. She always sees the best in people and always want to do the best for others too."
Meghan saw that he enjoyed talking about her and she enjoyed listening.
"She never wanted to hurt her father with what we had." He continued "He should've been grateful..his own amazing daughter..betrayed." Meghan saw his hands turn into fists and knew it was no longer an innocent subject.
"I'm very sorry for you Roran." Meghan said sincere, he smiled bitterly.
"Thank you. But it doesn't help me.."
"If I can help in any way.." Meghan didn't finish, Roran nodded.
"So..what's your story?"Arranged marriage huh?" Meghan swallowed, she wanted to tell him the truth but then he'd know she had lied before.
"Actually.." she hesitated "I lied." She said, calm and hoping for the best. Roran waited patiently for her to continue.
"I had to lie all this way. Because my secret is dangerous. I'm trying to escape from the king."
"Aren't we all?" Roran asked understanding. Meghan looked around for a short moment not completely at ease.
"Maybe we are. But I don't think he's glad I'm still alive. I used to work for him as a maid..but I fled."
"Why?"
"Why did I work for him or why did I run?"
"Both."
"I worked there because I despise the king. I fled because my family needs me. Now more than ever." Meghan didn't want to lie any longer. Roran nodded, still understandingly.
"You're very brave. But there's more is it not? You're hurt inside..you barely eat, Finn says you're having nightmares as well."
"There are no secrest among you are there?" Meghan grinned.
"You try to take care of people you care for. As long as you're with us you're one of us as well. So tell me what's hurting you.." Roran helped an old lady stand up beside them and then turned to Meghan again.
"I fell in love. And impossible love, and I had to leave him behind." Meghan said and she tried to keep her distance. She had not talked about this yet, nor did she intent to. It hurt too much.
"You love him very much don't you?" Roran almost whispered, it was all he was planning to ask. Meghan nodded.
"I'm very sorry for you too." He finally said.