Kukui was not the most responsible person when it came to sleeping. He sometimes stayed up for hours reading doing research and work. He didn't mean to stay up so late, but he so easily lost track of time. It didn't help that he didn't actually have a bed. Almost every night he went to his couch with every intention of sleeping at a decent time, but got distracted by one book or another. Before he knew it, two hours had passed and he could forget about getting a decent amount of sleep.
Kukui had been getting a lot better since Ash had come to live with him. He did have to be a good example for his ward, after all. He had been getting even better since Burnet had come to live with them. He didn't think he had stayed up too late since marrying Burnet. She had always been so good at getting him to listen to her.
These past few days had been no different. Kukui didn't remember staying up particularly late on any given night, but he still must have been pretty tired because he had found himself dozing off. He hadn't even noticed until he felt Burnet shaking his shoulder and gently saying his name.
"Kukui, get up," Burnet's tone was very nearly teasing, but it was still kind and understanding. "Guess who just got back?"
Kukui had only been half awake, but when he heard her words he quickly became more alert. He sat up with a start. "Ash?"
Burnet looked at him in amusement. "Who else do you think it could be?" She smiled and held out a hand to pull him to his feet. Kukui was eager to go see Ash, as he hadn't seen or heard from him since he'd gone off to Ula'ula Island. He would have ran off upstairs, but Burnet's firm grip on his arm kept him where he was. "Try to be patient with Ash, alright?"
Kukui frowned slightly. He hadn't planned on being impatient with Ash, but he knew that Burnet was probably right to be concerned. He was happy to have Ash back, far too happy to let his frustrations show. However, he knew that he still had lingering feelings of hurt about Ash not telling him directly of his plans of going to Ula'ula Island.
"You know I'll do my best," Kukui promised, and he meant it. Getting mad at Ash was the last thing he intended to do. He would be very disappointed in himself if he ended up letting his emotions get the best of him. He wouldn't be surprised, but still disappointed.
Burnet smiled gently and gave Kukui a quick kiss on the cheek. "I know you will. Now, go on, go see your boy."
Kukui felt his ears burn in slight embarrassment, but he didn't agree against Burnet's claim. Denying it would do absolutely no good, and Kukui knew that if he even tried she would just tease him further about it.
Instead of letting his embarrassment get the best of him, Kukui just brushed her words right off and made his way upstairs. He hadn't seen Ash in nearly a week, and he was beyond ready to see his boy...and now Burnet has him thinking of Ash like that...great.
Kukui ran up the stairs two steps at a time. He was eager to see Ash, to hear about what he had been up to while he had been gone. If Kukui couldn't have been with Ash to see him learn and grow for himself, he wanted to hear about all of it. It didn't matter how seemingly insignificant Ash's experiences were, Kukui wanted to know about it.
When Kukui got upstairs he was immediately tackled by Lycranroc, who just seemed ecstatic to be home. Kukui didn't think he had seen Lycanroc so energetic and playful since he had evolved from Rockruff. Lycanroc wasn't the only one of Ash's pokémon who seemed really excited. Torracat was running around too, while Pikachu and Poipole were chasing each other around. Even Rowlet, who was always eager to take a nap, was flying around eagerly.
Ash was the only one not running around. He was just sitting happily on the couch, looking at his Z-Ring and brand new Z-Crystal. When Kukui entered the kitchen Ash looked up from his Z-Crystal, his eyes practically shining from excitement. "Hey, Professor," Ash jumped up and rushed over to Kukui. To his surprise and pleasure, Ash greeted him with an embrace.
"Hey, Ash," Kukui laughed as he happily returned the embrace. "How was Ula'ula Island? I'm guessing you beat the island trial?"
"Yeah, though it took some time to get there," Ash smiled and rubbed his nose. "Kahuna Nanu really didn't seem to want to be challenged."
Kukui rolled his eyes. He had never met Nanu, but he had heard a lot about him from Hala and Molayne. "I could have told you that." Kukui didn't really blame Nanu for his reluctance. Most people wouldn't be too happy about being forced into a leadership position that they hadn't wanted in the first place. Nanu still did his job, he was just very picky about which challenges he accepted, which was his right as a Kahuna.
Ash may have been gone for longer than he had expected, but he had probably had an easier time than most people did with Nanu. Afterall, Ash was incredibly stubborn and wasn't one to take no for an answer, so Nanu might accept his challenge just to get him to leave. It also likely helped that Ash was a child, as Kukui had heard that Nanu was much kinder towards children than towards adults.
"I could have told you that you would have a hard time with Nanu." Kukui shook his head. The two of them ended their embrace and made their way back to the couch. Burnet came to join them as well.
Ash frowned slightly and tilted his head at Kakui. "Why didn't you tell me? I spent the entire first day looking for Nanu, because when I met him I didn't even know who he was." Kukui would have found that amusing, as he could easily imagine Nanu being so against doing his Kahuna duties that he would send a stranger off on a wild goose chase. But he found himself getting slightly defensive about Ash's question.
"I would have told you," Kukui said, and he absolutely would have. "If you had told me that you were going to Ula'ula Island in the first place." Kukui hadn't meant to get so defensive and aggressive about his words, but Ash's question had caught him off guard. He knew that Ash hadn't been accusing him of anything, he was likely just a little curious and confused, but it had brought Kukui's bitter hurt about Ash leaving back up again.
Kukui's words must have been harsher and more accusatory than he had intended, because Ash was looking at him in startled shock, and Burnet had put a calming hand on Kukui's arm. He took a deep breath to try to calm himself. He was hurt, but that was no excuse to lose his temper. He had to stay calm.
"What do you mean?" Ash looked at Kukui and Burnet in alarm, confusion and slight guilt clear in his eyes. "I told you...didn't I?"
Kukui's hands stiffened at Ash's words. He felt Burnet take his hand and squeeze it slightly in a reassuring way. "Not exactly," It wasn't enough for Kukui to explain what he was feeling, but it was all he could trust himself to say without completely losing it.
Fortunately Burnet had mercy on him and decided to take over. "I was told where he were going," Burnet smiled at Ash gently. "But think carefully, did you actually talk to Kukui about going to Ula'ula Island?"
Ash frowned and looked at Kukui. "I...I talked to you about Kahuna Nanu. You told me where I could find him."
Kukui remembered that conversation as well, and Burnet had been told all about it. She had probably listened to Kukui talk back through the conversation dozens of times as he had tried to figure out if Ash had, indeed, mentioned going to Ula'ula Island and he just hadn't noticed or bothered to remember. Kukui would feel ridiculous if he had let his feelings get so hurt over nothing. He still felt a little ridiculous, but at least he had a reason for it.
"But did you say that you were going to Ula'ula Island?" Burnet asked slowly, patiently.
"I...oh, wow," Ash's eyes widened in realization. He looked at Kukui, a look of overwhelming guilt in his eyes. "I-I guess I forgot to."
Kukui didn't understand why those words sent a sharp pain through his heart. He had known that it had probably just slipped Ash's mind, so why did it hurt to hear it being confirmed? It wasn't as though Ash had gone out of his way to not tell him. It was just a mistake, that was all. He had to get over it, because he could see the guilt in Ash's eyes. The boy felt bad. It would just be cruel for Kukui to make Ash feel even worse just because he couldn't get his own hurt feelings under control.
"I-I'm sorry, Professor," Ash said quietly. Kukui didn't know what he had wanted to hear from Ash. He didn't want excuses, and he didn't want apologies. What could Ash say that would make these hurt feelings go away?
"It's…" Kukui wanted to say that it was fine, but he couldn't make the words come out. His hesitancy to speak made Ash even more guilty and anxious, which just made Kukui feel worse.
Fortunately, Burnet decided to step in before Ash and Kukui just dug themselves deeper into the holes they had started to put themselves into. "We've all had a really long week. Why don't we all get some rest? We can pick this up again later." And Kukui knew for a fact that Burnet really did mean to discuss this again, but none of them were in a good state of mind to do it right now. They needed to take some time for themselves.
Kukui sighed and put a hand on Ash's shoulder. "I'm glad you're back," Kukui smiled at Ash. It was slightly strained, but not forced. Ash laughed slightly and returned the smile with a small one of his own.
Kukui stood up and, at Burnet's encouragement, made his way outside. Maybe a lap around the beach would help him to clear his head...or a dozen laps.
When Kukui got outside he felt the sea breeze go through his hair. It felt nice, soothing. He wasn't looking for a comfortable feeling though, he was there to push himself. Being physically active should improve his mood, make him feel better. He just hoped that his mood would last until he had that conversation with Ash, because there was only so long that they could avoid it.
Kukui shrugged off his lab coat and took two of his pokéballs out of his pockets. If he was going to be running along the beach, it may be easier for him to do if he had his pokémon with him. "I hope you two are ready for a workout." He let Braviary and Incineroar out of their pokéballs. "We've got some work to do, and we're not going to stop until we're done."
Kukui didn't care how long it took, but he wasn't going to let Ash be so bothered about guilt. Kukui had to get himself to calm down and get over his ridiculous hurt feelings. If he couldn't do that, at the very least he had to be enough in control that he could give the impression that he was alright. No matter how Kukui himself was feeling, he wasn't going to let it drag Ash down. It was his responsibility to make sure that Ash was okay. He had to put Ash first, himself second. That was what it meant to be responsible for someone else.
Kukui just didn't like how it was so much harder for him to do with Ash than with his other students. But was it because Kukui felt so much more responsible for Ash, or was it because Ash was much more likely to find himself in a situation where he might need help, but probably wouldn't recognize it?
Kukui didn't know, but it didn't really matter. He would drive himself crazy if he tried to understand why Ash was the way that he was. That was probably the reason why he was still clinging to that bitter hurt from Ash leaving, because he didn't understand why Ash hadn't told him.
Kukui couldn't do anything to change Ash, and even if he could he probably wouldn't. However, he could work on keeping his own emotions and thoughts in check, and that was exactly what he planned to do.
A/N: I considered having this chapter and the next chapter as just a single longer chapter, but I ultimately decided that thematically it works best as two chapters. Of course, that means that this chapter and the next chapter will be a little shorter than I would personally want them to be, but whatever.