WARNING: This chapter contains translated Pokémon-speak. More accurately, you get to understand what Tommy and Erika are saying to each other. And N speaks with his Zoroark friend, but that's not quite as entertaining.

"Wait!"

The twins turned simultaneously to see Cheren, running up to them as quickly as possible before skidding to a stop. He leaned against the nearby mountain to catch his breath, adjusted his glasses, and pulled out a Pokeball. "Battle me!"

Hilda folded her arms over her chest, glaring at her childhood friend. "What happened to 'Hey, guys, it's nice to see you?' Did you forget how to say that in your quest for strength, Cheren?"

"Hey, guys, it's nice to see you," Cheren repeated, and was about to challenge her again when Hilbert decided to change the topic.

"Where's Bianca? I thought you guys were traveling together now."

"She's about to challenge Skyla and told me to find you," he explained. "I figured I could get ahead quickly."

"You mean we're actually ahead of you?" Hilda gasped, and Cheren waved it away.

"I'm traveling with Bianca," he said, as a way of explanation. "That is a get out of jail free card for falling behind."

"Fair enough," Hilbert agreed, but the future battle was cut off by the arrival of a familiar head of insane red hair.

"You three again," Alder stated as he jumped down from the cliff he was watching from. It wasn't too tall, but it was still impressive. "You kids doing all right?"

"Look, Hilda!" Hilbert laughed, giving his sister a playful nudge. "It's the Champion. Grimsley might not be necessary after all, just fight Alder here!"

"Grimsley is absolutely necessary," Hilda retaliated, pushing him back a little harder than needed. "Alder will destroy my entire team. I need practice."

Alder paid no attention to the discussion of Grimsley, and continued the conversation. "So you're heading for your next badge, then?"

"We're waiting on a friend," Cheren corrected him. "She'll be here soon."

"Oh, so you're all planning to go to Icirrus City together," Alder laughed. "Stick together, kids, it's just on the other side of this mountain. I'd offer to show you the way, but your friend comes first and I have to get back to the Pokémon League building."

Cheren had gotten distracted halfway through, and instead of waiting for Bianca, called Alder back. "You can show us," he insisted. "Bianca just called to tell me she lost to Skyla. I'll go back and guide her through tomorrow."

"And you're sure she can handle herself for a night?" When all three reassured him of their faith in Bianca, Alder took the lead. "Come on, then, this isn't going to wait forever!"

N was nervous. He wasn't entirely sure this part of the plan would work, much less work in his favor. It wasn't exactly that he didn't know what he was doing, it was that sometimes, he didn't believe Ghetsis did. Or at least that Ghetsis had any plans to let him in on whatever it is he was doing.

"Can I at least see it?"

"No."

"For two seconds? Please? I won't touch it."

"For the last time, boy! Merely looking at it might set it off far too soon. We need privacy!" Ghetsis took a deep breath to calm himself, then adjusted the precious object he had hidden in his robe. "You will get to view it soon enough."

N glanced at the Zoroark walking along with him. "You'd think that being king would get me a few privileges with the plans."

"Hey. Don't worry about it. You'll see it." Zoroark stumbled a little, then smirked. "I'm honestly more concerned about our health. We used to be nocturnal. Sleep all day, party all night. Never grow old, never die."

"You're thinking of a movie again," N pointed out, "and as much as I might like to, I have never been nocturnal. And neither have you, so don't try to pull that one on me."

"Well, I don't have kids to stalk."

"For the last time, it's not stalking! It's...a curiosity, that's all. Hilbert and Hilda are just subjects in need of study."

"I thought you were a math person."

"Then call them mysterious factors in an equation. Besides," the boy added with a smile, "I have a hunch that they'll end up with more power than the Sages anticipated."

"Because we all know you see the future with perfect accuracy," Zoroark said, rolling his eyes.

N pretended to ignore the fox's sarcasm. "Exactly."

"I hate this place!" Hilda wailed. They'd lost track of Cheren and Alder long ago, and Twist Mountain was shaping up to be much more like the Mountain of Misery.

"It could be worse," Hilbert said, his optimism taking a turn for annoying once again. "The mountain could collapse on us."

"Don't tempt fate," Hilda warned, before she sat down on the dirty ground. "Why couldn't we have asked Skyla to fly us over to Icirrus City?"

"Because her TARDIS goes through time and is not meant to be used for a quick trip over a mountain." Hilbert said it as if it were a fact. "Besides, it's a cargo plane, and cargo planes generally don't carry people other than the pilot and maybe a co-pilot."

The girl seemed surprised at her brother's sudden knowledge, but that was a subject for another day. At the moment, Tommy had broken out of his ball once again, and was now attempting to eat his own mustache.

"Some things never change," she sighed, and pulled a box of Pokémon food out of her bag. True to form, Tommy swallowed the box whole and begged her for more. "No, Tommy. You won't get more until we reach the next town."

Tommy looked hopefully at Hilbert, giving him the best puppy eyes a Samurott could make. Hilbert held up his hands.

"She's the one with the food and most of the money. I have no part in this."

"What does money have to do with anything?" Tommy grumbled, and Erika released herself to talk to him.

"Money is what humans use to pay for food," she explained, the tip of her tail swishing in irritation. "And supplies, and fun things for us to do. Remember back at the lab, when Bianca's Oshawott and I used to throw rocks at you to get you to leave us alone? It's like that, except one human throws money at another human, and that other human gives them stuff."

"I thought you threw rocks at me because you hated me."

"That's the problem, Tommy, you thought. Of course, now that you mention it, we did kind of hate you. You ate all of our food as well as yours, caused unprovoked havoc in the lab, and nearly drove poor Professor Juniper to suicide until she put you in the back room, but that wasn't part of our original logic."

"But you like me now, right, Erika?"

The Serperior went silent. "Sure," she said, a bit evasively. "Just don't go around eating everything anymore. I might have to hurt you."

Tommy stared her down for about ten seconds before deciding that, yes, Erika probably could take him, and yes, she would do so with no hesitation at all. So, he allowed Hilbert to call him back into his ball, leaving the smug grass snake to return to her own portable home for a nap as the twins wondered what had just happened.

"Victory!" Hilda cheered, rushing into a block of daylight, her loathing of the sun forgotten in her glee. She'd almost gotten used to the "big, burny thing in the sky" as she traveled, but that was one vampire tendency she'd immediately embrace once more as soon as she was home. That didn't matter at the moment. They were free, out of the mountain tunnels, and were soon to meet the next Gym Leader.

She should have known it was a dead end.

"What is wrong with this place?" she demanded, kicking a small rock off the edge of the mountain, where it conked a Boldore on the head. The rock monster twitched, looked up...and saw absolutely nothing, since the human had retreated to whine to her brother and the Pokémon of the cave about how she was willing to give up.

Hilbert wasn't just going to let her quit. "We can't give up now!" He threw his hat, and Liepard jumped up to catch it in her teeth before handing it back to him. "You only need two more badges!"

"You think it's easy? Then you earn them."

"Your badge case is pink, and I don't have one," Hilbert retorted, grabbing her wrist to pull her along behind him, Liepard following with his hat still in her mouth. "Maybe we should come back in the winter. I hear it's easier to navigate."

"But what if Team Plasma succeeds in getting everybody to release their Pokémon?"

"Just a few seconds ago, you were going to give up." When Hilda didn't reply, Hilbert let go of her and started down a tunnel. "Well, then, come on. We have to stop them somehow."

A loud rumbling sound echoed through the cave, and Hilbert laughed nervously.

"But can we have dinner first?"

"Sorry. I'm out of human food." Hilda was pretty hungry herself, but that fueled her determination. She gave Hilbert a big smile, so innocent it scared him. "You're a teenage boy, right?"

"Right."

"And teenage boys like food, right?"

"Well, that depends on the boy, and what he's doing at the time. I don't think Cheren would stop mid-battle for food." That's when he realized she was talking about him, specifically, and he added, "I like to eat, though."

"So do you think that you could use your teenage-boy food sensors to get us out of here?"

Hilbert closed his eyes and raised his arm, dropping it swiftly and pointing in a seemingly random direction. "That way."

Well, long story short, Hilbert had gotten them more lost than before. It was Liepard, and a Boldore she befriended, that led them safely out of the mountain, into the sunset of Icirrus City.

"Good girl, Liepard," Hilbert said, scratching his kitty behind the ear.

Liepard purred, as if to tell him, "You keep thinking that."