Sorry about the delay. Been busy. See The Last Promise chapter 5 (Toad Memories) for a better explanation.
Don't own Naruto, never will. I do, however, own my OCs.
Kudos to DemonTwins-Ichigo-Makuri for telling me where to find another Yamagakura no Sato. It's in Naruto: Kageken Specialist. Haven't read it yet, but I will!
Oh...Please remember that Kiba wrote The Hated Hero.
(Excerpt from The Hated Hero)
From Chapter 4: Invasion
Everyone knew Naruto was shit at written stuff. He made no secret of it, and his handwriting was terrible too.
He was also incredibly honest, not always a good thing for a ninja.
These two facts put together meant the first part of our first Chunin Exam was probably the worst thing he lived through for many years.
(End excerpt)
--ooo--
It was Naruto's worst nightmare: a written test where he didn't have a clue about the answers.
"Naruto-kun."
Glancing out the corner of his eye, Naruto spotted Hinata sitting next to him. He must've been pretty worked up not to have seen her before.
"Fuu-chan gave you the paper, didn't she?" Hinata asked, her lips barely moving.
Naruto pulled the now-crumpled piece of paper from his pocket and placed it on his lap. He checked the questions, and they were all the same ones.
Gotta love Fuu.
'Yeah. I owe her for this.'
"Here," Naruto whispered back, "I'll share the answers with you once I've written them down."
Ibiki noted how quickly the Hokage's son was writing, and how the Hyuuga heiress was only a beat behind him, and looked towards the proctor who was watching that block of genin.
The proctor shook his head, unable to pin them for cheating and at the same time sure they shouldn't know the answers.
Meanwhile, Naruto's friends were doing their best to get through the test alive.
Neji's hair, cut short after a recent incident involving ice cream, Hanabi and a dozen newly sharpened shuriken (you can imagine what happened, but I might do a one-shot about that if anyone really wants to know), flopped forward to cover his face when he bent his head ostensibly to read the questions again. In truth, he was using his Byakugan to scour the room for anyone with the answers. He settled on Shikamaru, the brains of his friendship group, and hastily scribbled down the answers that he couldn't do himself with a mental apology to the boy he was copying off of. He'd done a few questions by himself, but some were beyond him.
Tenten had worked out a system with Lee for the answers neither one could get alone. Lee knew enough about topography, geography and battle planning based on these things to get some of the answers, and Tenten was a whiz when it came to trajectories and wounds, but neither one had a clue about hostage retrieval or identification of corpses in battlefield situations. They were using a pencil-tap code The Ten had developed, which Tenten had taught Lee when they became team mates, and quickly had a third involved in their discussion when Shino provided an answer for them and requested information in return.
Ibiki wished that whoever was tapping their pencil on the desk would just stop it! It was irritating. He suspected some sort of coded conversation, but couldn't pick up who was doing it. Neither could any of the chunin proctors.
Ino, identifying someone who was either a very good cheat or very smart, hopped into his head and memorised the answers on his page. Once back in her own body, she copied them down and checked on her friends.
Shikamaru was, literally, writing Choji's paper using a variant of the Kagemane he loved so much. Kiba was using Akamaru to get answers off other people as well as listening to Tenten, Lee and Shino's tapped-out conversation. Sakura had all nine questions done. Sasuke's eyes were red, so Ino assumed he was using the Sharingan, but he was having trouble getting the answer to one question from anyone around him. Knowing better than to hop into Sasuke's head, she'd copped an earful from him the last time she did it, she waited until he was utterly frustrated and then used a trick Obito had taught them: chakra writing.
Sasuke was surprised when a message appeared on the desk in front of him.
ANY LUCK ON QUESTION SIX? I'LL TRADE FOR QUESTION SEVEN.
The requested information appeared on Ino's page, and she rapidly transcribed it. It was the only question her "victim" hadn't been able to answer.
She responded with the answer to question seven, and left it at that.
She got a minor shock when a message appeared on her desk.
THE PROCTOR IN YOUR SECTION SUSPECTS YOU WERE CHEATING. BE MORE CAREFUL NEXT TIME, OK?
That was his way of thanking her, and she couldn't be happier.
At that point, Naruto requested permission to leave the exam for a moment, and was escorted out by a chunin.
When they returned, the chunin went up to Ibiki and mumbled, "He says that Yakushi Kabuto has information he shouldn't have on other participants, including first-time participants. Should I look into it?"
Ibiki nodded. Anyone with extra information about other participants, especially first time ones, was a risk. Even if they were from Konoha. Especially if they were from Konoha.
Kabuto, to the delight of The Ten and their team mates, was forced to hand over his cards and lost six points instantly. He would be questioned later about how he got the data on those cards, because when the chakra coding was cracked they found information on the cards which was highly classified.
As time passed, Ibiki watched with morbid glee as the numbers dropped. Those who cheated too obviously were being whittled away to none, until finally forty five minutes had passed and he called a halt to the writing.
"Ok." he said, "I'm about to give you the tenth question. I've got another rule for you: this one ain't compulsory."
The genin were confused.
"If you don't want to take the question, you can leave now and end your Chunin Exam right here. If you do take it, though, there's a catch: Answer it right and you move on, but answer it wrong and you'll be banned from taking the Chunin Exam ever again."
Protests filled the room as genin accused him of being a sadist.
"Yeah? That's just me." Ibiki replied, "It's your call. Take the tenth question and risk being banned from the chunin exams, or not take it and walk away to come back some other time? Same as before, if one of you drops out the whole team drops out."
Many people, terrified by the prospect of remaining genin forever, chose to leave the exam with their teams.
Sakura began weighing up her options. Sasuke and Naruto would refuse to put their hands up, she knew, because they were proud. It was up to her. Was it worth the risk?
Sakura deemed it not worth the risk, but as she went to put her hand up a familiar voice rang out.
"I can see why you're the head interrogator, Ibiki-san."
Everyone turned to look at Naruto, who had his elbows on the table and his chin on his upturned palms.
"Oh, Namikaze-sama?" Ibiki asked.
"Fuu-chan told me there's no better master of psychological warfare than you." Naruto explained with a shrug, "I can see she's right."
"How so?"
"For one, you don't have the authority to ban people from the Chunin Exams." Naruto explained, "That requires more power than you'll ever have, like a Kage or other hidden village leader. For two, you know how to take control of a situation and make us believe your every word. From the moment you entered the exam, you've had power over us and you've used it. You made us believe every word you've said. Smart, but you never said we could never become chunin, just that we couldn't take the exam again. That would've been more terrifying than never taking the exam again. I'm not a fan of paper tests, but this isn't just a paper test, is it?"
That's my boy.
The genin began to talk again, and Ibiki realised that the Hokage's son was right. Damn, why didn't he think of that?
"Is anyone else going to drop out?" Ibiki asked calmly.
No one else raised their hand. Naruto had encouraged them all to stay and try the tenth question.
"Well then, you all pass."
Stunned silence met his proclamation.
"The tenth question was a simple yes or no question: do you risk the unknown of the tenth question or take the safer method and drop out? As chunin, this is a question you will be faced with many times: Do you risk your life and the lives of your comrades to complete a mission, or do you take the safer route and opt out? Sometimes you can't not risk lives, because your decision is what decides who dies rather than if someone might die."
Ibiki took off his bandanna and showed them his scars, watching their horrified faces.
"We all make decisions, and we must live with them." he said, tying the bandanna back in place, "So you made the right one under these circumstances. You have passed the first part of the Konoha Chunin Exam."
As that was sinking in, someone burst in through the outside window.
--ooo--
"Ah! Masaru! Come in."
"Hokage-sama."
"Masaru! Don't call me that! I told you it makes me feel old. You're no older than me. My name is three syllables long. Repeat after me. Mi. Na. To."
"You know our positions demand at least a modicum of politeness."
"Of course, Kazekage-sama. Whatever you say."
"I trust you've been well?"
"Apart from the near constant headache from running Konoha?"
"Apart from that."
"Perfectly so."
"Your family?"
"Never better, although I do wish Naruto would stop bringing home strays. Have you heard about the latest one?"
"Not yet."
"I would've thought it'd be all the way to Water Country by now! He brought home a bipedal one this time."
"A bird?"
"No, a boy! A Hyoton user. You know Zabuza, don't you?"
"Who doesn't?"
"It's his apprentice. They met in Wave Country, and Naruto brought him back here. The paperwork I had to do to instate that boy as a Konoha genin must've been a thousand pages at the very least!"
"Don't exaggerate."
"Ok, so it was only a hundred or so pages, but still!"
"I hear your son is in the exam."
"Yep. Kakashi-kun nominated my son's team."
"You still call him 'kun'?"
"Don't you still call your former students that?"
"I never took on a team, remember?"
"Oh, that's right. You were never given the option…I heard your kids are in the exam too. Have you made amends yet?"
"They still won't talk to me."
"Sad."
"What were you doing before I arrived? I know it wasn't paperwork."
"Oh…Nothing."
"Liar."
"Promise not to laugh?"
"Do I ever?"
"Point. Ok, I'll show you."
"Why were you making a paper hat?"
"Naruto and I used to make them when he was really little. I've got a picture, somewhere, of him in a little orange romper suit wearing a paper Hokage hat. I'll show you, if you'll wait a moment while I fish it out from under this mountain of papers."
"They let you keep a picture of your son in your office?"
"Not officially. Why do you think it's hidden? Ah! Here it is. See? He's almost two here. I brought him to work because Kushina was on bed rest before she gave birth."
"Someone doesn't want to admit his son is growing up."
"I know he's growing up. Doesn't mean I have to like it."
"Do you think they made it through the first stage of the exam?"
"I don't doubt it."
--ooo--
Anko grinned. She loved making a flashy entrance, because it scared everyone.
"Alright, brats." she said, "I'm the proctor for round two of this exam, Mitarashi Anko."
Almost all the genin in the room stared at her like she'd grown a second head. The ones who knew her were either unfazed by her entrance or trying their best to keep from grinning at her entrance and outfit. She'd chosen the fishnet-and-trench-coat style her namesake ancestress was famed for, albeit with slightly more coverage under the fishnet. She usually wore shorts and a cropped t-shirt under her trench coat, so this was a little more revealing than she liked.
Giving her words time to sink in, she glanced around at the remaining genin.
The three rookie teams had made it through, although that was of little surprise to Anko. After all, she'd babysat most of them too often not to know how smart they were.
Gai's team were through, although it was obvious to Anko that Neji had used his Byakugan. He was good at hiding it, but Anko knew him too well to think he wouldn't use it.
The Suna "Sand-sibs" were through too, although Gaara gave Anko the creeps. Even if they were Juuyondaime Kazekage's kids, there was still something about Gaara that didn't seem human. And that said something, considering how the current Kazekage could be sometimes.
Kabuto's team were under close watch, she'd heard about his information cards already, and they looked distinctly uneasy. Honestly, she couldn't blame them.
One of the Oto teams passed too, the one with the bandaged boy on it, and Anko wasn't entirely happy about it. She'd heard rumours about them. Supposedly, that team had a reputation best described as "meet them and die". Add that to the intelligence they were getting from their spies about Oto planning to upset the exams…and the team was under surveillance at all times.
Maybe they were over reacting and nothing would happen, but they had to be very careful.
Indeed, Minato had ordered a constant surveillance of Masaru, who was an old friend of his, just because the Juuyondaime Kazekage hadn't responded right to something he'd said. Something about Masaru's kids.
"Oi, Ibiki." she said, "What happened here? There are seventy eight of them."
"There were exceptional circumstances," Ibiki replied, "and an exceptional crop of would-be chunin."
"Ah well, I'll cut it at least in half." Anko said cheerfully. She turned to the group and said, "Well, follow me kiddies."
She bounded out the window again, although the genin chose to head out the door and chase after her.
--ooo--
(Excerpt from Children of the Sand, 15th Edition)
From Part 2, Chapter 14: Juuyondaime
When one claims descent from Kankuro, son of the Yondaime Kazekage and brother of the Godaime Kazekage, one had better be able to back up the claims with decent skills.
Masaru could do just that, although he seemed to take more after Kankuro's father on several occasions than after the puppeteer.
One such occasion was when he didn't oppose the creation of a "living weapon" for Sunagakure. His wife, Karura, paid the price for his inaction, and their last child, named Gaara by his dying mother in an ironic replication of the past, would live with the stigma of being a jinchuuriki forever.
He left the care of his youngest to his brother-in-law, Yashamaru, who was a loyal man but whom the newborn jinchuuriki could not tolerate. It was a well known fact that, when picked up by Yashamaru or certain other people, Gaara would shriek and fuss until put back down. Even Masaru was unable to hold the boy.
For whatever reason, the only people the newborn, Gaara, would respond to positively were his older siblings Temari and Kankuro. They were his world, and would be his staunchest allies in years to come after they witnessed the first attempt on Gaara's life by their own uncle.
For years after the three siblings became estranged from their father, Masaru would moan to his Konoha counterpart, Namikaze Minato, about how he had been a fool not to do anything before Gaara was born and for doing what he did when Gaara was six.
(End excerpt)
--ooo--
The genin stared at the imposing forest beyond the thin mesh fence. Was it just their imaginations, or were there things moving within the darkness between the trees?
"This is Training Area Forty Four." Anko said, "Better known in Konoha as The Forest of Death."
--ooo--
Ibiki gathered up the exam papers once everyone was gone, intending to use them for kindling later, when he noticed a blank sheet of paper on the chair where Naruto had been sitting.
Well, it wasn't completely blank. It had a little note scrawled on the top.
TELL FUU THANKS FOR ME.
Ibiki picked up Naruto's test paper, read the answers that were worded the way he'd worded them on the test paper he'd submitted for review and had cleared, and put the facts together.
"Looks like I have to change the locks and combinations on my office cabinets." he commented to no one, "We have a natural spy on our hands."
The paper Hokage hat and the orange romper suit are based on my current laptop wallpaper which depicts just such a scene. It's chibified and cute, so I couldn't resist putting it in. Google "Naruto wallpapers" and it shouldn't be too hard to find.