I updated. Aren't You Proud?

This bad boy should be wrapping up. At least five more chapter and I'm done.

Enjoy...

"Why are you helping me?"

Nicky concentrated on the swirling blackness in her cup. It reminded her so much of her life. Sure she looked cute and delicate like this cup but she was full of shadows. Full of secrets.

She pondered what to tell him. 'Well, you see. You and I were together even though I was one of the reasons you were horribly tortured. I sent you on missions that not only distorted your mind but made you into a very cooperative animal. On top of that I carried your child but lost it once I knew you weren't coming back.'

"It was difficult… for me… with you." She settled on finally. Nicky chanced a quick glance but his stony face had not changed expression. She had always admired how perfect his face was. Like if it had been carved from one single perfect block.

Jason stared at her forcing her to lower her gaze back to her rapidly cooling drink. 'How much could she trust him? He was still technically at odds with her, they were working on opposites side of the fence.' His reactions and moods thus far were so extreme that Nicky didn't really know how to act around him.

"You really don't remember anything?"

It was a leading question, they both knew it. Jason and David had morphed at some point but Bourne refused to assimilate. He wasn't ready to trust her. 'After all, hadn't she just betrayed her organization to go with a rogue agent that supposedly had taken out their own people?'

David now Jason was cramming Bourne's mind with any tidbit it could find of the elusive Nicky Parsons. As usual his recollections always came at the most opportune moments. It was difficult for Bourne to keep his emotions in check when the object of them was sitting in front of him.

New Amsterdam - Safe House - First Behavioral Test

"I'm sorry." he mumbled ignoring her wounded look, Bourne tore the package allowing her time to straighten herself. Two photos were in it, one was Conklin's and the other was unknown. Bourne flipped the second photo over - Albert Hisch - it read on the back.

Also included was two transmitters and a cell. 'Ask Nicky.' the note on the phone read, "Tell me the code." he said to the now calm handler.

"1789."

Bourne punched in the numbers and waited for an answer. Two rings later a deep voice congratulated him,

"Good job, Bourne. Get you instructions from Nikki, she should of just gotten them. She's a treat if you like." the voice commented with twisted glee.

Bourne closed the cell and dropped it on the table. She was bent over a fax machine carefully reading the incoming transmission. Bourne hadn't liked the implication the voice had given him. While he didn't deny that he found the blonde attractive, he wasn't about to let the agency dictate who and where he would take any woman that he liked.

He wasn't an animal. He did approach her, vaguely wondering if she knew what her role fully entailed. The sudden desire to touch her again after his mission surprised him but it dawned on him that the adrenaline was still pumping and would soon need a release.

"You're to go to Geneva. We have two hours to prep you. I need to do a quick evaluation of your health at this juncture and sign off before you continue on---" the words died in her mouth at the gentle pressure on her hair.

Nicky had been worried that Conklin had meant for her to be a complete asset to… well the assets. In all honestly though she was rapidly falling for Jason she was still a little bit afraid of him. It would be suicidal not to respect what he could do.

"Your hair is very long." he commented fully aware how her breathing was a tiny bit more shallow and her eyes were trained on the long finished fax. He grasped a strand experimentally tugging on it until her head moved back just an inch.

"Wh..wha…what…Um…why?" she managed to utter.

"I can but I won't" he answered cryptically. In a flash he released her hair and took the fax from her hands. "Is this it?"

"Yes it is." she snapped ripping the papers from him. 'Just because she might love him, didn't mean she was going to be easy.' "Don't touch me again." she hissed but it only made him smile at her.

It was a smile that promised that he would touch her again and that she would not be opposed to it when he did.

Present - Cafeteria - Spain

The image dissolved. Bourne found himself mesmerized by her will to continue with him. She was still waiting for his response. "No."

Her eyes a normal lively brown darkened and fell back to her cup. Bourne had never seen the light leave someone after he extinguished it but he imagined that it would look exactly like Nicky did now.

The bell over the door jingled merrily as two cops entered and immediately began socializing with the waitress at the bar. The same one who had served them earlier.

"We have to move," he whispered moving her ahead of him.

She pulled a few euros from her pocket and dropped them on the table. Bourne picked one up and exchanged it with his own. 'Why did I do that?' he thought as he pocketed the money and followed her much smaller and suddenly more frail frame.

They left their car, walking for a few blocks to make sure any police on their tail had vanished. By now they had to be searching every car in the lot of the Cafeteria, that would take them a while.

The night was cold but Nicky was already numb. She had thought that helping Jason would be cathartic, she had hoped that it would at least make them even and at least soothe a little bit of her pain. Instead it had ripped open the hole Nicky had sworn had vanished when he put his gun against her head.

Their shoes made little noise as Bourne looked around them every once in a while searching for a suitable replacement vehicle. "We should arrive at the ferry soon. I have the tickets that Daniels originally purchased. Once we get to Tangiers we'll have to sit and wait until he re-emerges."

Bourne took her hand and wrapped it around his arm tucking it into the crook of his elbow. "Excuse me," he said in Spanish to a pair of policemen stationed at the corner. The cop took one look at their entwined arms and smiled.

"The alley. It opens near a warehouse. We should be able to find another car there." Bourne directed once the cops disappeared from sight. He dropped the pretense along with Nicky's arm. "Did you hear me?"

Bourne and Jason collided at her monotone response, "alley, car. Got it."

The ride to the ferry didn't fare any worse and this time Bourne drove. It was times like these that Bourne hated driving not just because of the headlights that pierced his skull but because more and more of his recollections kept pushing to the forefront.

His unintentional mistreatment of Nicky was making the block of guilt grow larger with every soft sigh she uttered.

She was curled on her side, her head pillowed on her scarf. She was awake, her open eyes reflected the lights of the city. He had definitely lied to her back at the café. He knew that she was important to him and that he had cared deeply about her but Marie had taken her place.

It felt like he was cheapening Marie's memory by admitting it to Nicky.

"We're here."

Nicky adjusted her scarf over her head tucking it into her coat. A gold cross glinted on her neck. A cross he had given her a lifetime ago. She had touched that earlier when he ran across her at the safe house. 'Did it represent salvation or regret?'

Both blinked at the morning light. Bourne had been up for two days now so driving the whole night had not registered. He knew that at some point he would need to sleep. 'Could he sleep knowing that she was just within an arms length away? Could she?'

His question went unanswered as they approached the marina. Nicky pulled two crumpled tickets from her purse. She handed one to him but made no comment as he stepped out of the car, locking the door and following her up the gangplank to the Comanav.

The ticket agent took them, stamped them and gave them back. Nicky took both back and shoved them deep into her bag. Bourne looked at her curiously but her back was already to him. He found her leaning against a rail. Her body position was at an angle with the railing.

Undisclosed Safe House - 5 Years Ago

He had searched every local hospital for her. He hadn't meant to hurt her. One moment he had arrived from Monaco and eagerly kissing her and the next she was cradling her arm and he was above her.

Jason rubbed his temples wishing the migraine away, he didn't have time for it now. He had to find Nicky and apologize. He had to find her and tell her he had no idea why he had broken her arm.

Several hours had passed when he finally got a break. A familiar dark sedan drove past him near the canal. He kept his eye on the car until it turned a corner speeding off into the night. Jason followed it calculating which way it had gone.

A sign for a hospital was just at the edge of the corner, Jason took off at a jog knowing he was on the right track. Jason had known that Conklin had been making sure that Nicky was suitably protected by having her followed by Danny Zorn.

The kid had a good head on his shoulders but he was not worthy of Nicolette and while Jason tolerated the kid. He certainly was not about to have him around her especially if she was hurt. He squelched the tiny voice that reminded him, that he, Jason was the reason for her pain.

He spotted the car parked across the entrance of the tiny hospital. Danny himself was leaning up against a building concealed in its dark shadows. Jason took up position downwind from him and in a better hidden doorway.

After two hours, Jason's patience was rewarded. Nicky came stumbling out with her arm in a cast. She reached the edge of the curve and hailed a taxi but was splattered for her trouble. She cursed at it then began laughing. Just as he was to go to her aid, Zorn approached her and guided her to his car.

Jason missed a lot of what was said but he did manage to hear Nicky's plea. "No, I don't want…" the exhaustion coated her voice but she struggled on. "Not alone, take me with you." she said.

"Any other time, I would have been happy to hear that." Danny replied and put the car in motion.

Jason waited until the car took off. He carefully concentrated on the tracking device he had placed on the car earlier. He adjusted his coat and walked towards Danny's home, the anger kept him warm. The jealousy made him very dangerous.

By the time he arrived they were no longer in the street. He surveyed the area and figured that Daniel would like a secluded spot to be with Nicky. It was now six in the morning and though he should have been at her apartment waiting he wanted to be absolutely sure of what he was suspecting.

Sure enough a balcony door slid open and out stepped his Nicky. She was wearing a robe and leaning against the railing. Jason took her in. She looked beautiful even with her injury. Remorse and guilt filled him anew, 'how could he have hurt her like that?'

His guilt trip was cut short as Danny came out and stood behind her. He gently lifted her hair to the side dropping a kiss on the side of her neck. She squirmed and turned into his arms. In that split second before Danny dragged her back in, Jason stood out in the open.

Danny looked down and Nicky gasped and just as quickly Jason Bourne vanished.

Present - Aboard the Comanav

Jason walked silently over to her. She slid her gaze off the water and onto him. She tried to smile but it was strained. Jason stood uncommonly close to her. Nicky turned to glance at him.

He could feel her confusion but he kept his eyes locked on the rapidly churning water. Realizing she was not going to get an answer for his uncharacteristic warmth, Nicky went back to contemplating the sea.

"I remember you."

Her head snapped up but Bourne continued to stare down into the depths ignoring her shocked look.

"I remember us."