Author's Note (Please read): I apologize for leaving the FF dot net crowd in the dark. I kinda realized that today as I was lookin over things. Long story short: I'm pregnant and just passed the 37 week milestone so my son could come at any time. Couple that with a tooth problem mid-May and writer's block, well, ya'll can see why this chapter is horribly late.
My update schedule will now be 'when I get a chapter done'. I think it's best considering the circumstances. Sorry if that puts a damper in folk's enjoyment of this (or maybe you're celebrating the lack of me updating my stuff XD). I will be finishing this story, but much like my other multi-chapter story, it may take a year or five.
For those that are aware, I have a DeviantArt page (my username is also Zikore over there -I'm Zikore pretty much everywhere). There you can find my pitiful attempts at art and my sprite work, plus the story is over there as well.
I now return you to yer regularly scheduled chapter. :3
Standard Disclaimer: I don't own Smurfs, obviously. This is a mature work of fiction and may contain dirty jokes, sexual situations, actual sex, violence, gore, horrible puns, real consequences to actions, and characters who are not infallible.
Reviews: Lac Lausanne: That chapter was so fluffy I got diabetus from writin it. XD I actually got reminded from reading another story about the blue clay (and Sassette almost) exploding. It was from the show. That's just my twisted little spin on things that spawned me wanting to write out an AU scenario where Sassette did set off a chain reaction just to see what terror I could inflict on the village. :3 The idea's in my 'AU Smurfs' file. Bwahaha!
***Extra Warning for First Days*** All the cloned smurfs here are twisted by the spell that created them. As such, I'll be exploring darker subjects. As always, I'll issue general warnings at the start of each chapter.
Warnings for: Mild Violence, Sexual Situations
Smurfs Forever Side Series: First Days 04
Brawny stretched, coming awake surrounded by pink. He looked to his left, seeing Nightshade's relaxed face and her hair fanned out on the pillow. The strong smurf rolled over, wrapping his arm around the smurfette.
The dark haired female blinked awake, recognizing who was beside her and smiling. "Smurfy morning."
"A very smurfy morning." The clone levered himself up onto his elbow. They had spent most of the time between dinner and bedtime hunting for ingredients. Afterward, it had been the smurfette who'd suggested sleeping over.
They hadn't actually made love, as much as the muscle bound smurf wanted to. He was content with the exploring they'd done before falling asleep in each others arms. Thinking of it made him want to kiss her again.
The same sentiment was running through Nightshade and she closed the gap between them. He pulled her closer, falling back onto his pillow and taking her with him. Their hands roamed as they kissed, exploring bare chests and inflaming each other with their ardor.
Brawny didn't want to push her. He especially didn't want to hurt her, but he wished his raven haired beauty would take off the little scrap of pink cloth she wore for underwear. Maybe if he took his off, she would too. The tattooed smurf caught her hand and lead it towards the hem of his only article of clothing.
Should she? The florist wondered. The smurfette was sure that her smurffriend wanted to go further. The problem was the thought made her nervous, a bit scared even. Her hand brushed past the hem and she felt him through the cloth instead. She just needed a little more time.
It wasn't exactly what he wanted, but he'd be lying if he said he didn't like it. The strong smurf jumped as a horn blared in the distance. Another meeting? The couple pulled away from their kiss.
"I hope Chief isn't going to smurf meetings every morning." The male grumbled as he took a last opportunity to run his hand down his love's side. He got up, knowing that if they were late there would be a smurf sent to find them. He dressed quickly, figuring he could clean up after breakfast. He hoped.
Nightshade made a fuss over her hair and dress, changing her mind three times before she settled on one.
When she started to do the same over her shoes, Brawny coughed, trying to remind her of the time. It didn't seem to phase her. They were the last to the meeting, arriving shortly after a yawning Gluttony and near sleep-walking Surgery.
Once informed that all of his subjects were present, Chief started his announcement, his voice carrying over the silent crowd.
"Most of you have likely heard about Wrath attempting to run off with that child. Well it didn't end well for him! Any smurf caught deserting the village will be hunted down and brought back, dead or alive." He ground out the last three words.
"To ensure that the other smurfs won't stumble upon the village, guards will be posted at each exit, and a patrol will monitor the wall." The dark clad smurf was pleased that he didn't hear any groans. Now, what else? Oh yes, the farming one had said they needed food.
"We will need a gathering party to harvest food." Several hands rose. "Anyone within the party will have to be careful not to be seen by the other smurfs." A few dropped, but most still seemed like they wished to help.
"Lastly, since the wall is completed, those of you with more essential jobs will be able to return to them. Planting is still a priority." He tiled his head upwards, looking down at the assembled smurfs. "Once planting is finished we will be able to return to normal activities." That is, until he was ready to launch his plan. Chief smiled at the thought.
"Dismissed!" He finished, watching the crowd head towards breakfast. A few smurfs stayed behind, likely the volunteers for gathering. He pointed at Clever, silently delegating the task to the glasses wearing smurf. Oh, there was one more smurf heading towards him. He waited to see what the kilt wearing one would say.
"Ah, Chief. If I could smurf a moment of yer time." Warrior started.
"Make it quick." The dark-clad smurf answered. He still needed to plot out the perfect way to storm the other village, which included checking up on the progress of the blacksmith. If only he had... well, he did technically. He'd go talk to a certain smurf at breakfast then.
"I think we need te start learnin how te fight. Tha other smurfs dinnae fight often, so not many of us are good at smurfin. I think it'd also smurf off some rivalries." If Warrior were honest with himself, he'd admit he just wanted to show off and bust a few heads. But presenting it like it was something that would be good for their village made it more likely he'd get his way.
Chief thought about it, rubbing his chin. They did need to know how to fight better than Papa's smurfs. "Fine." He agreed. "But you're in charge of the training. There will be no killing. Understood?"
"Aye, Chief!" The scotsmurf was already thinking about where to have the 'training' and what rules to enforce. This was going to be glorious! Caught up in his plans, he didn't notice the elder walking away.
00000
Gumbo couldn't believe it. First Cook came into the kitchens looking like he'd been thrashed, then once the meeting was called he spotted Brawny arriving with Nightshade. Either both of them just happened not to drink from their pitcher or something was conspiring against him. Gluttony wouldn't do something like that, he was sure. Besides he had his own agenda, and from the looks of his tired friend that plan hadn't gone well either.
Both he and the plump smurf hurried back to the mess hall to finish putting out the food for breakfast.
"Gre-gre, you don look so smurfy." The cajun smurf started.
"Rough night. I'll smurf you later." The gourmet answered tiredly.
Cook seemed to notice as well. "Unsmurfy dreams?" The italian smurf asked. If it was, he could certainly relate.
"Yeah." Gluttony lied as he picked up several laden plates. No need to announce what he'd done to everysmurf.
"So what smurfened?" The frycook looked around, trying to keep his voice low as they placed the plates. Already smurfs were walking in and seating themselves.
"She can smurf magic even while gagged." The plump smurf wondered how much he should tell for only a moment, then kept telling his tale. "She smurfed me up and we smurfed."
"Dit mon la verite'!" He exclaimed. That was too unbelievable. "Smurf me da truf!" He demanded quietly.
"It's true." The bib wearing smurf had a far off expression. "I would've smurfed that it was a dream if I hadn't woken up next to her." He looked at his best friend with a confused expression. "She smurfed she liked being tied up."
Gumbo wasn't sure what to say. Wasn't that female already smurfing the doctor? They had retrieved the last of the food and set it out before he finally wondered exactly how his friend was going to deal with the situation.
"Gre-gre. What chu gonna smurf?" The other smurf had already sat down at his usual table, so the cajun smurf leaned over.
His still confused expression seemed to say it before he did. "I don't smurf." He was aware of his friend patting his shoulder and leaving. Since he'd awoken it'd been one jumble in his head. He liked what happened... didn't he? He certainly seemed comfortable with what he'd tried to do. What did that make them? What did it make him? It all seemed like some demented dream.
If the other smurfs noticed him eating slower, they didn't comment.
00000
Fighter looked at his team of smurfs. Wrangler, Indecisive, Pensive, and Reaper. He'd been put in charge of heading to the sarsaparilla fields to gather some of the leaves there. The others didn't seem too enthused about him being in charge, but he could handle it!
They collected the gathering baskets and set off. They made good time, walking quickly and keeping quiet to avoid both predators and possible discovery from the white clad smurfs. At the sight of the familiar leaves, the group began to relax.
With only a cursory glance around, Fighter headed up to a promising looking plant. The leaves were a bright new-growth green at the top with darker green towards the bottom of the stem. The smurfs quietly started picking.
Indecisive looked at one leaf and then another. Would this one taste better? Or would it be the other one? Maybe the more tender ones higher up?
Fighter noticed the flighty smurf having issues again. He stalked over, smacking him on the back of the head. "Just smurf them Indecisive." He growled.
The smacked smurf gritted his teeth. He started picking leaves, trying to decide if he should retaliate or not.
"Hello smurfs!" The voice was both familiar and not. The word smurf was friendly, meaning both the race and 'friends'. The five clones froze.
"Oh smurf." Indecisive's eyes were wide. They'd been seen! What should they do? Run? Try to trick them? He really didn't like these white clad smurfs. They'd ruined this outing.
Pensive waved a hand. "Lemme smurf this." He said quietly, his mind already formulating a plan. This was Traveler, Camper, and Harvest from the looks of it. If Reaper spoke the similarities in their voices might give them away. So have him keep quiet and-
"Oh no. I'm in charge of this mission, smurfhole. I decide what we're gonna smurf." Fighter glared at his slouching companion.
Camper hopped with excitement. "Wow! We've never seen other smurfs before! Who are you smurfs? Where do you smurf from?"
Wrangler ignored the question. Fighter was going to do something stupid, he was sure. "Fighter, ya know Pensive's tha thinker. Why not let 'im smurf ta these smurfs?" The annoyance on the camping smurf's face gave him a measure of satisfaction.
"Hello? Smurfs?" The white clad smurf asked again. His two companions exchanged confused looks.
Fighter cracked his neck. Annoying these smurfs was kind of fun, but they had some strict rules. They weren't supposed to be seen. He lowered his voice and reminded his comrades. "Chief smurfed we shouldn't be seen. So we smurf them to Chief."
That left them only one course of action. A thrill of excitement swept through him as he charged forward. "Smurf them!"
Pensive slapped his hand over his face. "You nincomsmurf." Still, he had to help. He ran forward with Wrangler and Reaper.
Indecisive whined to himself, frozen to the spot. Help? Run? Run was looking really good right about now. Two of the white-clad smurfs were already fighting two to one against his fellow clones. There was one that kept backing up though.
"Indecisive, smurf him!" He heard Fighter yell. Well, he had to now. He surged forward, running to Harvest. He saw the stick arcing towards him and tried to stop. The piece of wood struck true and the flighty smurf was out like a light.
Reaper spotted the grey-clad smurf going down and scrambled back to his feet. Wrangler could take care of Traveler by himself. He had to capture the gleaner smurf, so he half-staggered, half-ran towards the basket carrying smurf.
The white-clad smurf dropped both baskets and ran. The chase was short, the grey smurf lost sight of his quarry quickly. He dashed to where he'd seen the smurf last and looked around. Harvest was hiding, he was sure.
After a few moments, he wasn't so sure. If he was hiding, acting like he was walking away would be a good strategy. "Smurf!" He cursed before walking a short way away and hiding behind a tree.
There he waited. Nothing. Blast it all. He'd let the smurf get away. This wasn't good. The other smurfs would soon find out about them now. He trudged back to the others. They had tied up the two prisoners and were currently putting them on poles to be carried. Fighter looked at him pointedly. The gleaner clone could only shake his head in defeat.
"You'll probably smurf a demerit for letting that last one smurf away." The pugnacious clone sneered as he finished a knot. Reaper glared at him, getting ready to retort.
Pensive beat him to it, leaning back against a stalk of sarsaparilla. "That's if you don't smurf a demerit for attacking like a nincomsmurf." Pensive griped, sounding bored. "We could have tricked them, or smurfed friendly and claimed we were more transfmurfed smurfs or something. Anything!"
"He's right, pardner. T'wern't no excuse for smurfin 'em up." The Wrangler agreed… Though he had enjoyed the fight. The harvester clone nodded.
Only time would tell if he'd done the right thing or not. Though the boastful smurf was certain he'd done well. "Let's just smurf these two back to Chief. They can't smurf a rescue if they don't smurf where these two are." Fighter announced smugly. With a last check of the ropes, the smurfs picked them up and started back towards their village.
00000
It was the most comforting kind of torture, a cruel joke she was playing on herself, Comic decided as she woke up in Alchemist's bed. Maybe playing a few pranks would cheer her up. The bomber stretched, climbing out of the bed. Her eyes landed on the small cauldron with the fireproofing, genderswapping potion.
Why not? The redhead grinned. So what if any victims were knocked out for about three hours as they transformed? This would be fun. But who first? And what sort of delivery system? The comedian pondered this as she dressed. A joybuzzer kind of thing!
The prankster fairly danced with anticipatory glee. Oh yes, something small. Maybe she could even fake that the transformations were contagious? The redhead giggled. This was exactly what she needed to improve her mood!
Ladeling some of the potion into another vial, she carefully corked it before she headed out to her own house. It didn't take much time for the joker to dig up a few joy buzzers, the small rings had a variety of different methods to startle folks. One was taken apart and tinkered with until she was sure it would press a small sponge to whatever squeezed the little device hard enough. A handshake, a pat on the head or back would be enough. Only after a few tests did the smurfette load the little potion laden sponge into the ring.
By the time Comic was done breakfast was long over. Ah the prices she paid for comedy! Now. Who would be the funniest to turn into a smurfette? It only took a second for the prankster's mind to supply an answer. Why the toughest of the smurfs of course! She headed out of her house and towards a rock shaped building.
The clanging could be heard long before the redhead actually saw the blacksmith working at his forge. Along a shelf there sat several spear heads, ready to be placed onto shafts of wood.
"Heya Forge! What'cha smurfin?" The bomber started looking over the spears. They looked like they'd already been sharpened.
"Privet." The hammer falls didn't stop. "Am smurfing spears. To what do I smurf the pleasure, Zho- no, you are smurfed Comic now, da?" The banging slowed as the metal cooled. This one was a few hits away from being done.
"Yup!" The meandering route took the female closer to the blacksmith.
"And you have smurfed here for?" Forge rumbled as he finished the spear head. Picking up the hot metal with tongs he dipped it into a cooling bin, where the metal hit the water with a hiss and a small plume of steam.
She was close enough, so the smurfette reached out and clapped the smurf on his back. "Just smurfing by to say hi! Smurf ya later, Forge!" She started to laugh.
The smurf looked perplexed just before the bee-sting sensation started on his shoulder. "Chto?!" He managed before collapsing.
After getting her mirth under control, the redhead made sure the transforming smurf was comfortable before she headed out. This would be the best prank ever!
Comic couldn't contain her giggles. She spotted both Fighter and Wrangler heading out with three other smurfs ladened with gathering baskets. Well, couldn't prank them yet. The thought of the outdoors crowd did give her an idea though. Whatever Herder was calling himself, he really had nothing to do today thanks to the village having no animals to watch over. And Brawny! The redhead hummed as she made up a list of potential victims. Warrior, Lumberjack... hmm. Why not just see how many she could get to after that? She had about three hours after all.
Laughing, the prankster stopped by a sleeping smurf. "Hey Sleepy, do ya know where Herder smurfed?"
The tired smurf cracked open an eye. "He's smurfing himself Rancher now. I think he's..." The smurf trailed off with a yawn. "At the fields smurfing Planter."
Suddenly the redhead bent over him with a giggle. "Thanks, Sleepy." She purred, causing the smurf to blush. Just as quickly as the female bent over she was up and jogging away. "Smurf a nice nap!" She laughed.
"Eh?" It felt like a bee had stung him on his chest, then the world went dark.
Within an hour, Comic estimated she'd transformed a good two dozen smurfs. They were on to her now though. Her sides shook as she laughed quietly from her hiding place behind a stack of barrels near the storehouse.
"I think she smurfed this way!" That sounded like Bard. The footfalls charged past her hiding spot. Good thing she'd gotten both Azrael and Stalker. Those two would probably have been able to find her easily.
She lifted the small vial up, inspecting it. Her vial was almost out.
"Let's smurf if I can finish this vial." She whispered, refilling the ring for the last time. Creeping out from behind the barrels, she snuck around the storehouse.
A large, heavy weight fell on her from above, driving the redhead to the ground and knocking the wind from her lungs. "Got ye lass!" Oh drat, it was Warrior. The bomber tried to catch her breath, unable to even giggle.
"Now, ye need ta smurf tha consequences, Comic." The scotsmurf hauled the female up, holding her arms securely.
Could she reach him with the ring? The prankster tried and failed.
"Be glad nosmurf has smurfed tha Chief about this. Yet." The smurf growled as he marched her out onto a main street.
"Joke's on me now." She still felt out of breath. If he would just move a little closer...
Smurfs started to follow them as they headed to the infirmary, their expressions angry. Physician answered, looking harried. Once he realized who was in Warrior's grasp, his look became murderous. "You've got a lot to smurf, Comic." He growled.
The smurfette began to laugh. She spun suddenly, but either Warrior was prepared for it or she telegraphed her movement somehow. He caught her by the wrists as she tried to shove him out of the way.
"Ah, so what's this?" The scotsmurf announced. Uh-oh. He'd spotted her ring.
She struggled but the smurf was far stronger, holding her arms tightly under one of his own, he pried the ring off her finger. "Quit fightin me, lass. It's over."
Drat. "Well, it was smurfy while it lasted." Comic sighed in defeat. She watched as the adventurer smurf handed the ring over to the doctor.
"Is this a magic item, or some other kind of smurf?" He looked at the redhead, who shrugged cavalierly. "We know you smurfed some kind of magic and that it's smurfing the smurfs into smurfettes and smurfettes into smurfs. All we're missing is what it is smurfxactly."
Surgery bustled from transforming smurf she was checking. "Can I see that ring?" The item was handed over carefully and the female looked at it with her eyes glowing. While the diagnostic spell was created to look at living creatures, it could also show roughly if things were magical.
The female hummed in thought. There was magic, but the ring itself wasn't magic. She pulled a tongue depressor out and gently probed the modified buzzer. "So that's it..." She muttered to herself as the sponge was revealed.
Comic decided that if Surgery was clever enough to use a probe to look at the ring instead of her bare hand, she'd probably be a lot of fun to try and outwit for pranks. The redhead grinned, leaning back against the doorframe. The smile only became wider as Warrior looked at her suspiciously and moved to block the closed door.
Physician took some tweezers out and picked up the small sponge. Some of the liquid contained within beaded onto a corner and the two medical smurfs quickly pulled their exposed skin away as it dripped to the ground.
"It's a potion." The doctor announced. "Is there any more? Will you have to smurf more? How long does the transmurfation take? Is is safe to smurf them up?" He walked towards the female as he bombarded her with questions.
"Yes. No. Three to four smurfs. I don't know." Comic sing-songed back.
"We should wait then." Surgery waved a hand in the general direction of the filled beds. "Better ta wait then take the chance of 'em feelin agony while transformin." She couldn't tell if the sleep state the potion induced while the transformation occurred was a side effect or something that was needed to keep those transforming from feeling the changes. She resisted the urge to tap the sponge to Comic and then wake her back up.
As if he could read her mind, Warrior brought up a suggestion. "I think tha lass should smurf here an help. There was a crowd outside tha dinnae smurf too happy with her."
"We still need to smurf that potion too." Physician agreed. "So where'd you smurf it?" The doctor looked at the comedian.
The bomber was silent for a moment. She had a vial tucked into the hem of her hat, it was the same one that was in her pants pocket the morning previous. It was somehow more special to her. Well, better to give up the cauldron then. "It's at Alchey's, in a cauldron on his workbench. Should be easy to smurf."
Warrior went to get the potion, while the two healers discussed the best way to 'cure' their patients. The talk annoyed the prankster.
"It's not like I smurfed 'em with poison ya know." The redhead pointed out, leaning on the bed frame and watching Clever's hair slowly grow. Huh, a lot of smurfs had red hair, it seemed.
"I'm smurfing a lot of them will be mad, just the same." Physician grumbled. He was still frustrated at getting interrupted about an hour ago.
"All they have to smurf is to use the potion again tonight at bedtime." Comic stretched. "They'll wake up in the morning smurfed back right."
The doctor huffed. "We'll let you smurf them that."
The prankster laughed. This would be fun. She'd get to see all their expressions as they woke up. She walked slowly along the beds before she finally located Forge. She'd be the first to wake up. The bomber pulled up a chair, settling in to watch the potion finish transforming the black haired smurf. Twin red streaks broke up the slowly growing ebony locks, like dying embers amongst coals. It seemed fitting, given the smurf's profession as a blacksmith.
It was almost lunch time when the first victim started to stir. "Chto?" The smurfette sat up, taking stock of where she was and noticing the redhead sitting at the foot of the bed.
The blacksmith's eyes narrowed. "What did vy smurf, mudak?" She snarled. A moment afterward she realized how differently her voice sounded. "Khm?!"
Comic clung to the chair as she laughed. "You're already smurfing it out."
Forge raised her hands up to her head, feeling the wavy tresses. Methodically examining herself, she put together the mystery quickly. Whatever had changed the redhead into her current female form had been used on her as well. The stinging feeling!
Snarling expletives in Russian, the blacksmith was up off the bed and tackling the prankster off her chair. She managed to land a decent punch to the bomber's gut before being hauled off by Physician.
"I will not smurf fighting in the infirmary!" The doctor barked. He had to yell it again before Forge stopped struggling.
"If this is how I am smurfed, there will soon be one less comic." The blacksmith growled, shrugging away from the smurf's grip.
"It's… completely... resmurfable." Comic wheezed, staggering to her feet. "It's just... a joke."
Forge crossed her arms. Thankfully her usual apron was covering her chest. "Is not smurfy joke."
"Wha-what's smurfing on?!" A few beds down, Sleepy had woken up. She had sat up, the blanket falling down and presenting her assets to the rest of the conscious smurfs. Surgery hurried over to cover her back up.
By the time the lunch bell rang, it was pandemonium in the infirmary. Angry smurfettes and smurfs threatened the prankster bodily harm after getting over their surprise at waking up as the opposite gender. Some took the news better after they found out they'd be put to rights by the next morning.
Others however… "By Golly, she needs to be smurfed a lesson!" The now blond Lumberjack shouted angrily. Nearby smurfs were glad that the wood cutter didn't have her trusty axe with her.
"Bet when you smurfed you wanted to be in a smurfette you didn't expect this!" Comic laughed. Several of the victims started towards him.
A piercing whistle interrupted the advance. Physician hopped up onto his desk. "I've smurfed it before and I'll smurf it for the last time. There will be no fighting in the infirmary!" He glared at the angry smurfettes and pair of smurfs. "It's lunch time, how about we all smurf to lunch and just resmurf the changes tonight? It's only half a day to smurf."
The crowd headed out, the most disgruntled ones trying to wait out the bomber. They had little luck, as the redhead was sharp enough to wait for all of them to leave.
Surgery helped to straighten the beds, glancing occasionally at the other female. She did feel she owed Comic, making her a real smurf instead of a construct in addition to their shared secret of having done the spell had her approaching the comedian.
"Ya do jokes like that often?" It wasn't the best opener, but it would satisfy her curiosity.
The bomber grinned proudly. "It's the first time I've smurfed magic. I've smurfed all kinds of tricks. They'll smurf over it." She had behaved on pulling out the love potion... for now. The smurfette's grin became devious. Maybe it was time to cross that line and see how far she'd get.
"What's that smile fer?" The medic backed up a step. She'd been transformed into a male before but didn't have any desire to miss lunch.
"Just smurfing about other jokes. Comon, I'm hungry!" Without waiting for the other female to agree, Comic snagged her hand and towed her out the door. Surgery managed to call to Physician that she'd see him at lunch.
The village was abuzz. Strangely, smurfs were heading toward the south gate instead of toward the mess hall.
"Huh. What's smurfin' on..." The two females headed towards a gathering crowd of smurfs. There was enough space that they could easily see two smurfs in white pants sitting on the ground with their hands tied.
In varying degrees, the grey clad smurfs were aware of their immediate dislike of the two smurfs. The pull of the spell that made up their being called for them to heckle them, hit them, cause them grief.
Surgery became aware she was squeezing Comic's hand and had a scowl on her face. She blinked, releasing the pressure. Beside her the comedian had a similar reaction, flicking her closed fist to alleviate the pain from her nails biting into her palm.
"I think... I think we should try an' figure out a way to at least lessen that spell." The brown haired female murmured. "It's annoyin feelin like I'm a slave to some magical commands."
"You too, huh?" Comic agreed. "Donno if there's a way to smurf that."
Chief walked past them, the duo quieted watching and wondering what their commander would do.
00000
The trip back had been just as uneventful as the trip to the sarsaparilla fields. Bard and Gambler gave the harvesting group strange looks as they walked through the gate with their prisoners. The four smurfs put the white-clad smurfs down where Fighter pointed.
"Smurf 'em here, I'll go smurf Chief." Both Traveler and Camper looked on nervously as Azrael approached them with his dagger. The genderswapped clone efficiently cut them loose from the poles.
The cartographer looked up at the clone, his eye swollen shut from the earlier fight. "So what are you going to smurf with us?"
The grey-clad smurf smiled a cheshire grin. "That's for the Great Chief to decide."
Onlookers gathered, but the two captured smurfs didn't have long to wait. The grey smurfs seemed to edge in closer, anger or anticipation on their faces. The gathered clones could see the worry on the two prisoner's faces. Then Camper's bruised face changed to one of surprise.
"Are you smurfing what I'm smurfing?" The hiker asked his companion. Both smurfs looked in shock at the black clad smurf approaching them. If it hadn't been for the color of the older smurf's clothes, he'd be a twin to Papa.
"Papa?" Traveler asked hopefully. Hope gave the smurf a surge of energy and he hopped to his feet. "Thank smurfness!"
The camping smurf jumped up as well. "Was this some smurf of a prank?"
The two white-clad smurf's joy lasted only a moment longer before Chief nodded sharply at one of his spear carriers.
"Don't smurf up to the Great Chief like that! Bow!" Gambler used the blunt end of the spear to strike the back of Camper, the already bruised smurf letting out a cry of pain and dropping into the dirt. It only took the clone raising his spear again for the mapmaker to take the hint and he lay prone as well.
Finally the elder spoke. "And who are you two?" He'd rather be chasing Fighter to knock some sense into him. He'd explicitly said to not be seen, not to take prisoners! Playing dumb would help now though.
"I'm Traveler and this is Camper. We smurf from the village southwest of here." Why did this smurf look so much like Papa?
"We weren't aware there were other smurfs in the area." Chief lied. "But I do caution all of the smurfs here to remain unseen." Now, how could he play this so he could hold them captive?
As the elder wondered, a distant shout gave him the answer he was looking for.
"Intruder Alert!" The gathered crowd rippled with excitement.
Perfect. Chief smirked. "You spear holders, go capture that spy!" He watched the clones rush off before he turned his attention back to the two smurfs. "We'll put these two in irons and see what their plans were. Everyone else, back to what you were doing!"
The crowd dispersed reluctantly, casting glances back at the two white-clad smurfs as the harvesting group got them to their feet and marched them towards a storehouse. Chief followed them. Once the leg irons were on and a guard posted, he had new guards posted from those that had already eaten.
The two white-clad smurfs looked at him nervously as he entered the storehouse. Looking the area over he decided they needed a proper place to put prisoners once he went through with his plans. That would be later. Hopefully he'd have more time to prepare. He wanted to check to see if these two had any inkling of what was really going on.
"So, what was that spy all about?" The elder smurf folded his arms as he glared at the duo.
"It was probably Harvest smurfing where we'd been smurfed to. There have been enough of us smurfed that we all try to smurf what we can to rescue each other." Traveler pointed out in what he hoped was a reasonable tone.
"Yeah, if you smurfs traveled, didn't any of you get smurfed by other creatures?" Camper asked.
"I'll ask the questions around here!" Chief snapped. "You want me to believe that you weren't watching us before that?"
The baffled expressions of the two white-clad smurfs told him that they hadn't, even before the one with the black eye spoke up. "We never smurfed any of you smurfs before today."
The black-clad smurf paced, thinking. As much as he just wanted to get rid of the two now, he had a plan to stick to. Try as he might, he couldn't think of any further questions that wouldn't be telling them new information if they didn't know it. Finally, he stopped pacing and looked at the two.
"Very well. I'll believe you. For now." The elder turned and left. A spear wielding smurf nodded to him as he closed the door.
Now to see to those idiots that ignored his orders in the first place.
00000
Their seating arrangement hadn't changed much. Fix at the end with an empty chair next to him. Physician sat in the middle seat, with two empty chairs next to his right and an empty chair and the handysmurf on his left. On the side that faced Surgery and Comic as they neared the table were Clever, Bumbles, Brutus, Maddy, and Forge. The prankster almost hid behind the medic as they approached, most of the genderswapped smurfs glared at the redhead.
The situation didn't change at the table when they sat down, the bomber moving her chair so that her back was against the wall. It slid her slightly closer to Forge, who gripped her fork tight enough that her knuckles were an almost white shade of blue.
Clever was the first to speak. "Either you're smurfing very brave or really foolish." She'd pulled her straight red locks back into pony tail.
Bumbles had managed somehow to avoid Comic's potion spree. "Maybe she's here to smurf sorry?"
"Not likely." Clever grumbled.
"It's not like I've smurfed ya forever." The prankster countered.
"I'd be more annoyed that I got knocked out fer three hours." Surgery interjected. "Ya could've pulled that prank tonight an' got most of the village. Then they'd just spend a day swapped an' turned back the next night." She was aware of the horrified stares the rest at the table gave her.
"No. No. This is smurfier than that." Forge announced, stabbing at a bit of food.
"And how would you know it's not that bad?" Maddy asked, scratching under his hat at his bald head. "It's just weird all over."
"Brutus wanna be a boy again!" His sister cried. The former naughtie's hair was a massive mess of red and she'd stolen (and stretched) one of her brother's shirts.
The medic shrugged, ignoring the whining. "I've seen spells that can do tha same thing. Lots of spells that can do sooo many things." She smiled lecherously as she licked a bit of gravy from her spoon.
"Is there any time when you don't smurf about smurfing?" Fix sighed from his seat.
"When I'm asleep?" The brown haired smurfette chuckled.
"I smurf we use that potion on Comic right after lunch." Clever started, trying to get the conversation back on track.
"Da. That sounds like smurfy plan." Forge agreed.
The redheaded comedian shifted in her seat. It wasn't the thought of being male again that worried her, it was the thought of what an angry prank victim could do while she was unconscious that made her reluctant to agree right away. The smurfette didn't trust many smurfs. Though maybe...
"Only if Surgery smurfs sure nosmurf tries anything." The bomber countered.
"You don't have any room to make demands." Maddy glared, pointing at the redhead with his spoon.
"If we smurf the potion on her in the infirmary it should work out." Physician pointed out. Not to mention that while the joker was out he might get to finish what he started that morning with Surgery.
A clanging echoed through the mess hall and smurfs turned to look. Warrior was standing on a chair, hitting a soup tureen with a spoon.
"Right! Now that I've got yer attention. We're going te be beginnin trainin after lunch. Just outside tha north gate we've got a nice clearin. Any smurf worth their smurf should be there, unless ye're lily-livered cowards!"
From the crowd, a clone called out. "I'll smurf if I get to smurf Comic." The chorus of agreements turned the noise level in the long room into a cacophonous din. Lots of smurfs wanted to fight the bomber after what had happened.
"I think we can arrange tha'." The scottish smurf drawled. The smurfs cheered.
"Looks like we've been outsmurfed." Forge said smugly. A good beating might be just the thing the prankster needed. The noise level dropped back down, though it was still loud. Excited predictions on just what this training entailed kept the clones talking.
This wasn't going to be much fun, Comic decided. But if any of the fake smurfs thought she'd meekly take a beating, they'd be surprised.
Azrael burst into the mess hall. "Hey, where's Chief? Papa Smurf and some other smurfs are at the south gate!"
Clever jumped up. "I'll smurf him!" The bespectacled clone was gone before any of the others had time to protest.
00000
Chief was in the middle of a tirade. Marching back and forth in front of the five assembled smurfs in the leader's - well his technically - house. "And if you idiots mess up like this again I'll make sure it's the last mistake you ever ma-"
"Chief! Chief! Papa Smurf is here!" Clever didn't bother knocking, barging right into the leader's home.
"Blast it all!" The black-clad smurf growled. The other smurf hadn't wasted time in getting help freeing his friends then. The elder checked the time and pulled out his metal flask. Now wouldn't be the time to go making stupid decisions. Taking a drink, he put the top back on.
"Sir?" The sideways hat one spoke up. "Could we smurf to lunch or are we needed?"
"Dismissed." The leader barked distractedly. The five smurfs filed out. He sat the flask down on his desk as he started pacing. He had a decision to make and he had to make it fast. Try and capture the smurfs at the gate, or play nice and keep some semblance of cover?
The latter, definitely.
"I'll take care of this." Chief announced as he left the small house.
Clever glanced at the door then back to the flask on the desk. She should find out what exactly their leader was drinking. She scooped up the little bottle and was out the door. The glasses wearing smurfette headed to her house instead of where the excitement was. She only had a limited amount of time to get the answers she sought after all.
Going to the small workbench, she carefully opened the metal container. Fanning any fumes from the bottle and smelling carefully she tried to identify the potion by scent. She expected the scent to feature Centaurea cyanus heavily. The deceiving looks of the centaurea flowers translated in magic to a transformative ability.
Instead, she smelled Clematis. She brought her nose closer. She couldn't tell the species, but those plants were often used in potions affecting the mind. The apprentice took out a few vials and poured a bit of the potion into one. Taking out a cauldron and lighting a small flame under it, Clever set to work.
Deconstructing a potion was harder than creating one. With the right tools you could tell what was in the potion and at what amount, but like trying to turn a cake back into it's basic ingredients after it had been baked, it was impossible to revert a potion into it's parts. The cauldron soon bubbled as Clever mixed water, alcohol, and potash along with a drop of liquified smurfroot. It was as close to a true universal solvent as any smurf had discovered to her knowledge.
Finally the almost alkahest was done and the smurfette carefully poured the vial into the cauldron. The liquid immediately separated, magic flowing freely away as it was released in the reaction.
"Clematis vitalba..." The smurfette murmured. Quicksilver and water as well. Those pointed to one thing.
The magic user picked up the flask and pondered out loud. "But why would Chief need to smurf a mind sharpening potion?"
"Hiya Clever!" Bumbles chose that moment to burst into the female's home.
The glasses wearing clone startled, losing her grip on the flask. She fumbled trying to grab it but missing as it fell in an arc.
And landed in the cauldron.
"Ooooh smurf!" Apparently the flask itself was enchanted, the metal bottle sparked as the solvent tore the magic from it and started eating away at the metal that made up the physical item. The potion inside didn't fare any better. The magic was released in a fireworks like flash, temporarily blinding both of the grey clad clones.
"Bumbles." Clever growled as she scrubbed at her eyes. How would she be able to fix this? Chief would have her head on a pike!
"S-sorry." He tried to blink the spots out of his eyes. "What were ya smurfin on?"
"It doesn't matter, it's smurfed now." Just like me, the smurfette thought worriedly. If she could figure out a reasonable substitute... Knowing the potion was safe she tipped the last few drops from the vial onto her tongue.
She didn't have time to brew another batch, much less figure out whatever enchantment was on the flask and mimic that. But the potion itself tasted close enough to clematis and dandelion tea that she could probably reproduce a fake in short order. That'd give her enough time to fix what she'd done, it wouldn't harm Chief (in fact if the elder had been drinking the potion regularly it'd help him to take a break, mind altering potions were dangerous and habit forming), and she wouldn't be punished!
But for now, make a quick replica and fill it with tea. The smurfette dug around her cabinets, she had a flask or two, she was sure. They wouldn't be an exact match, but a small blend in enchantment would fix that.
Ah! There it was! The apprentice scooped up a plain metal flask out of a drawer and turned to her klutzy friend. "Bumbles, I need you to smurf up some clematis and dandelion tea. Can you smurf that?"
"Sure!" Glad he wasn't getting an hour long speech about how irresponsible it was to enter without knocking or something like that, the smurf was eager to please. "Do ya have it all here or do I need ta get it?"
A quick check of her stores provided the needed clematis and teapot, but she was out of dried dandelions. The clumsy clone announced he had the needed ingredient at his house and rushed out to get it, smacking his shoulder hard enough on the doorframe that. Clever grimaced. How that smurf hadn't killed himself or somesmurf else was beyond the intellect's ken.
00000
Chief waved a hand and other smurfs followed him to the south gate. He'd probably have to let his new prisoners go to maintain a facade of neutrality at least. It was amusing how the crowd of true smurfs gawped at him like he was something they'd never seen before. It grew tiring quickly though.
The Papa clone crossed his arms. "Well, what do you want?" It was so tempting just to order his smurfs to capture them. They certainly had enough to overwhelm this small number. But then he'd have to try and attack the village too soon.
The red clad elder lifted his hands in a sort of supplication. "We came to try and smurf out a misundersmurfing. We smurf in a nearby village and two of my little smurfs have been smurfed by some of your smurfs."
"Yes. I was just punishing the dolts for being idiots." Chief answered. Papa would likely take that to mean they wanted to be friendly. Ha! At least this would throw them off somewhat. He picked one of the clones around him at random. "Go get those two smurfs. And be quick about it!" The smurf hustled off.
When the black clad smurf turned back he saw the red clad one smiling. Yes, think we're nice, you simpering fool. He almost missed what Papa was saying.
"You must have some smurfy stories to tell. How did you smurf this whole village since last fall?"
It was on the tip of his tongue to teasingly answer 'magic'. But that may give away too much. Instead, Chief smirked. "That's a trade secret." The clank of chains had him glancing behind him as he spoke. "In any case, here's your missing smurfs. We're very busy and have work to get back to."
The two prisoners were unchained and practically ran to their fellows. Papa approached Chief with his hand out for a handshake. "There are no unsmurfy feelings, my friend. It would be smurfy if you would smurf to the party we're having tomorrow evening."
The black clad elder kept his arms crossed, sneering. "Bah! Who has time for frivolous parties?" Even as he said it his mind hit on a way to turn that to his advantage. Maybe a party was just what they needed.
But the red clad elder had already dropped his hand. "Well then, we'd best smurf back to our own village and allow you to get back to what you were smurfing." Seemingly reluctantly, he led his smurfs away.
The grey smurf leader scratched at his beard in thought, watching the smurfs as they left. "Tomorrow evening. I think that would work out nicely." He chuckled.