Tenzin walked down the hall to the lobby, finally deciding to call Lin at the Beifong Mansion. He was about to ask the receptionist for the phone when a woman wearing a heavy, jade green brocade cloak approached the counter.
"I'm looking for this man, have you seen him?" Tenzin heard her ask, her voice slightly muffled by her hood and by the scarf he could see poking through her outer garment. He saw her hand a small photograph to the receptionist, pointing to it.
"Oh!" The receptionist, a perky young woman in her early twenties, gasped. "You're in luck! He's standing right behind you."
The lady turned towards him, her cloak billowing around her as she did. Her bright emerald eyes looked straight into his soul.
"Lin."
Her cheeks were red from the cold, and she was visibly exhausted – small beads of sweat were on her forehead and her breath came in shallow gasps. "Kya… she told me you would be waiting," she told him.
Tenzin was overjoyed to see her - in his joy, he pulled her close and into a tight embrace. Somewhere in the background, the perky receptionist was struggling to contain her giggles and sighs, obviously moved by the sudden display of affection in front of her. Lin yanked his head closer to hers, resting her forehead on his. He felt her body being shaken by sobs and thousands of words left unspoken between them.
"I prayed so hard for this moment to come," Lin whispered, never once pulling away. Tenzin planted a kiss on her forehead, and she let her tears finally spill. "Tenzin."
He pulled away, looking at her with sadness in his eyes. Taking her hand in his, he led her to the inner courtyard, towards a gazebo nestled in between the trees. Lin held onto him without protest, even as the cold air made her hands numb.
Listen and wait.
"Lin…" Tenzin allowed his voice to trail away into the night. His heart was full to bursting with mixed emotions that he didn't quite know what to tell the woman seated beside him. Lin adjusted her scarf so it clung to her tightly, obscuring Tenzin's view of the lower half of her face. She tucked her slender hands, almost blue from the cold, into the pockets of her cloak. By the look on her face, Tenzin knew she was just waiting for him to talk.
"I – I'm getting married when spring comes," he began, half-expecting Lin to slap him – but Lin's face remained serene. "And I just wanted to see you - how you're doing, I mean. Also, I wanted to tell you that if you ever need some assistance in raising the kids, well… er… I'm just a phone call away."
"Will you go back to Republic City after this?"
Tenzin shook his head. "I decided to have some time on my own – for a week or so. Yeah. Maybe I'll go south for a while – see how the people at the Southern Temple are doing."
Please stay, she thought. "You should call home, Tenzin. Your mother called this morning and she is worried sick about you."
Tenzin remained motionless.
Lin reached up and touched his face, right where Bumi's fist made its mark. "You're hurt," she said gently. "Is it Bumi?" Tenzin closed his eyes at the tenderness of her touch, remembering how she used to hold him. She calmly put her hand down, letting it rest on top of Tenzin's. "I'm sorry."
"I deserved this," he said, smiling at her – "this and worse."
"Why are you here, Tenzin?" she asked him.
He sighed in reply.
She squeezed Tenzin's hand. "You can tell me anything."
"I want to be honest to myself and to you, Lin. The truth is, I went here because… I am having doubts about my coming wedding."
Lin tried to keep a straight face, despite Tenzin's revelation. Listen and wait. Suddenly Tenzin's face was right in front of her – he gently loosened her scarf and kissed her lips. It wasn't like any of the kisses they used to share – this time it was needier, more passionate like only a first kiss in such a long time should be. Lin found herself delighting in Tenzin's kiss, but she reluctantly pulled away. "This is wrong, Tenzin," she quivered. "I don't want to be the ruin of your engagement."
Tenzin stared at her for the longest time. "I love you, Lin. I am who I am because of you. You are everything to me, and every dream I've ever had, and no matter what happens to us, I will always be yours."
She swiftly drew away from him. "Please, Tenzin. Don't torment me with your promises and your sweet talk. At the end of the day, we all know who will win – and it's Pema. You are bound to her in the eyes of everyone. And I – I'm just an old flame of yours, a fleeting fancy, a childhood love. You don't know what you are saying."
"Lin, please."
Lin faced him, her emerald eyes misty with tears. "Tell me, Tenzin - what do you want?"
"I don't know, okay?" he shot back.
Lin tried to regain her composure by breathing deeply. "You don't know what you want, but you kissed me. What do you want?!"
"You cannot go around asking me what I want, Lin – because it's not as simple as it looks!"
Lin felt an ache in her belly, but chose to ignore it. "Face it, Tenzin. At some point, you have to choose. And whatever choice you make, you have to live with it forever, even if you will regret it. Nothing is scarier than regret," she told him calmly.
Nothing is scarier than regret – there it is again, spoken this time by Lin. "Lin, I want you, and I cannot lie. But Pema is waiting for me back home, and so is my family. I made a promise and I cannot afford to break it."
She wanted to slap him so hard, just to see if he would finally wake up and realize whatever it was that he really wanted. "Stop being such a pain in the ass, Tenzin," she told him coolly. "And could you please stop thinking about what everyone else expects of you? All your life, you've been ruled by those expectations. For once in your life, do something that would make you happy, and don't give a damn whatever people will say."
"You're one to talk," he retorted. "Didn't you live your life according to what you thought your mother expected of you?"
"I learned from my mistakes, Tenzin." She pointed a finger at his chest. "I lost you and everything that mattered to me. But if you can look me in the eyes right now and tell me that you could clearly picture a future without me, then so be it. I won't fight."
He looked at her, his grey eyes trying to break through the invisible walls she has put up. "I don't want to spend the rest of my life dreaming of things that might've been," he sighed.
"Listen – don't take my advice. Don't listen to anyone's advice, for that matter," Lin said, placing a hand on Tenzin's chest. "Trust your heart. This is your life, you can do whatever you want. It's all up to you." Lin pulled him towards her, and this time, it was she who kissed him. Tenzin responded to her, softening like melting wax under her touch. I don't care what they say when they see me like this, kissing him like there's no tomorrow, Lin thought. What matters is here and now. He is here. He is mine once more, and I will never let him go.
Tenzin pushed her down, trying to get some control over her. Her scarf, amazingly, seemed to be missing – before she realized it, Tenzin was trailing kisses along her neck, biting down on her ever so gently. A moan escaped her lips as she grasped Tenzin by the hair, feeling electrified as his lips seemed to set her skin on fire. She greedily looked for his lips with her own, and finding them, bit down hard enough to draw blood. Finally they drew away from each other, breathless, their lips smeared with crimson.
Lin wiped her lips, rising from her seat. She cringed at the pain she felt in her abdomen as she rose, but she took a deep breath and it disappeared. "I have to go."
He offered to walk her out, but she refused.
Lin hoped that all the listening and waiting was worth it.
A/N: This is, so far, my favorite chapter ever! I hope you guys like it too!
I'll be doing a triple shift after this, so please expect an update on Wednesday. :) Thanks!