The Jedi Change
Disclaimer: I do not own Star Wars.
Chapter Twenty-One- No Fate
"You disrespectful whelp!"
Anakin disguised his laughter with a cough and bowed. "Sorry, Master. I got ahead of myself."
Siri rolled her eyes and turned off the lightsaber. "Oh…shut up."
He held out his hand to assist her in rising from the ground. "That last flip was a beauty, Siri. But you should remember not to let the slurs of your opponent goad you to a mistake."
She eyed him, critically, while rubbing her aching backside. His last attack had been a doozy.
"Dooku," she meaningfully hissed.
Anakin reluctantly nodded. "Point taken."
She walked with him into the still-smoking-from-skirmish garden, and they drank from the fountain together.
She watched him wipe the sweat from his brow and marveled at the knowledge she'd actually made him work to knock her down. The young man had tremendous talent. Perhaps that was an understatement. Her friend was rich with the Light Side of the Force, but she also knew of his flaws. When others worried about such traits, she saw them for what they were—something he could overcome with age and experience. He was not unlike herself.
Anakin had courage he hadn't even tapped into yet. She would not rush the eventual realization for him. He would find it himself, and he would apply it when necessary.
For now, it was telling that he would take time to visit with her at all. Well…it wasn't just for her. They had one day before they would return to battle. Since he could not venture to Coruscant in such a short time, he needed to have something to pass the time.
And keep his mind off Padmé.
Sparring with a friend would give his body exercise and bring him a small measure of respite from personal troubles.
The afternoon had provided mutual distraction for the two misfits of the Jedi. It kept Anakin from wallowing in longing for his wife, and it had kept her from seeking out Obi-Wan. She had not spoken to him. They had spotted each other from across the battleground first; but once it ended with victory declared for the Republic, they remained on opposite sides of the encampment.
It had become more and more difficult to keep a distance. Obi-Wan was so much more successful than she in hiding feelings, but she could not ignore his magnetism. He had been happy to see her. She felt it, and the pull was strong. She'd felt the spark of pleasure in him though he turned away almost immediately after their eyes met. He had not come to her, but she knew he wanted to. Yet, he stayed where he was.
It was Anakin, restless, that had come to see her.
She cleared her throat. "Will Kenobi be looking for you?"
Anakin shook his head. "I told him where I was going. If I'm needed, he'll use the COMM link."
She looked away. "You were great out there this morning, Ani."
He shrugged noncommittally. "Self-preservation is a great motivator."
She grinned. "Is that what it was?"
He rocked back on his heels and smiled. "Absolutely. Can't come home with any more scars."
He winked with vanity he feigned. "I'm the poster boy for the Republic, you know. I gotta keep the looks."
"Oh for stars' sake…" Siri breathed with good humor. "I believe it is more of 'Padmé will bolt me to the floor of the apartment to keep me from going on another fool's errand if I get hurt one more time'."
His smile dimmed a little, and she told him, "I'm sorry, Anakin."
"Don't be silly," he said and tapped her nose. "You're right."
She traced the thin, red line that started above the natural arch of his eyebrow and down to the crest of his cheekbone. "How did you get this one?"
His jaw tensed and his eyes flared. "Ventress."
Siri sighed. "Do you want to talk about it?"
"No," he tersely replied. He shook his head and tried to smile for her again. "Just that 'fool's errand' you mentioned. Master Obi-Wan has already chastised me for it, so you are spared the duty."
She shuddered. "As if I had the right, eh? I imagine your ears rang after that particular sermon of his."
"Well, I deserved it this time," he told her. "You shouldn't worry, you know. He's…the same as always."
He looked at her as if to measure something. She knew what he was seeking, and she certainly was not going to give him fodder to chew.
A woman was entitled to her mysteries.
"I appreciate the exercise, Ani." She gripped the lightsaber. "And letting me use this."
"My pleasure. It's Master's."
She knew that. "So he knows what we're doing?"
"Sure. He doesn't mind…so long as we don't lose it."
"This weapon is your life," she said sternly, imitating Obi-Wan's crisp and elegant Coruscanti accent.
Anakin chuckled lightly. "Yep."
She mimicked maneuvering drills and whispered, "I miss it."
"I know. I would, too." Anakin watched her and asked, "Siri, do you ever wonder what it would have been like if you had remained with the Order?"
"No." She faced him. "No, Anakin. It is not my destiny, sweetheart. I know that. To remain would have been…pointless."
"I don't think the Council agrees with that assessment." He grunted. "I very well know that Master Obi-Wan doesn't."
Her head snapped up. "Has he discussed it with you?"
"Well…no, but I can sense it in him. He…misses you, Master."
"You are projecting, Anakin," she sighed.
"This thing with destiny and fate," he began slowly. "With all the talk that I am the Chosen One, that it is my fate to bring balance to the Force…I am expected to act in a certain way for it, but I am not trusted with the opportunity to meet it. How am I supposed to believe in it myself? Have you ever thought that fate is only what we make of it?"
Siri considered that for a moment. "I believe that there is free will. I believe that the Force has a map prepared for you to follow, but that It also provides you with the capability to diverge from it. I suppose you could say that, yes, your future is what you make of it and not predestined. There are choices you could make that may alter the map, but your end destination would remain the same, I think. You would just have unnecessary details to cloud your judgment once you arrive.
It would then be a question of how much faith you have. You could trust the Force to guide you appropriately, or you can eschew that assistance and have nothing to catch your fall. I left the Order because the Force called me to something else. It is not a poor reflection on the Council or the Jedi."
"So you recommend patience."
"I recommend patience. There are no whispers of defeat yet, Skywalker."
"Be mindful of the here and now."
"Naturally."
"You're a Jedi to the marrow of your bones, Siri. Without robes and lightsaber, but here you are."
She clapped his arm affectionately. "The robes…I do not miss."
He followed her back into their impromptu training circle. "Why would you when you work that black leather unisuit like nobody's business?"
"Anakin!" she goggled, her cheeks turning red.
"What?" he chuckled. "It's an observation. Even the clones have an…appreciation, if you will, for your choice of attire."
"You're going down for this, Skywalker," she said, igniting Obi-Wan's lightsaber.
"Show me what you've got, Master," he replied with a cocky grin. "I'm breathless with anticipation."
♦
There was something shifting in the Force. It was a greater turbulence than the fight she now engaged. There were whispers she could not understand. The tremors of which were rocking through her, and she focused on maintaining her equilibrium.
Siri sprang to her feet and spat the blood out of her mouth. She controlled her temper, but it was far from effortless. She had anticipated the strike. She couldn't let the sting of it drive her to sloppiness. She parried the wide swing of the red blade expertly, stepping Asajj backward. Her defense became the offense.
She could not think of the Jedi. She could not think of Obi-Wan or Anakin. She thought only of Asajj. They were well-matched in combat. Each woman had been trained in the Jedi arts. Each had suffered in some way at the hands of the Sith, but only one of them had embraced the Dark.
She fended off the hot, aggressive style Ventress used accordingly. Her lessons under a lifetime of instruction were not failing her. Her last assignment had prepared her for this meeting. She had hoped it would not come down to this, that she would succeed in returning Asajj to the Light.
Watching Dooku's apprentice execute a back flip with fluid perfection while swiping at her, Siri realized that the passion of Asajj's hatred and self-loathing could make this a very prolonged fight. Under different circumstances, they could have been a tremendous compliment to each other. They could have stood side-by-side and worked as one to illuminate the darkness. As it was, Siri knew she would have to follow through and eliminate the remaining Sith before further damage to the Republic could begin.
If it was her destiny to transform in to the Force to accomplish it, then she would accept it.
Siri blocked the next punch thrown and responded with a kick to her opponent's open right side.
Ventress flew back with a groan and hit the dirt.
"It didn't have to be this way, Asajj," Siri told her, saber pointed to the ground, waiting. "I never wanted to hurt you."
"Die, Tachi!"
Their blades clashed again as Ventress leapt to her feet with a speed that should not have surprised Siri.
This could get ugly, Siri thought and grit her teeth against the brute strength of Asajj's assault.
♦
Chewbacca finished the explanation, and Siri nodded.
"You won't need to guide him, Chewbacca. He'll find me," she said. "I appreciate all your help, old friend. Your loyalty will be rewarded."
He barked a reply.
"Well, you shall have my gratitude just the same. Go back to your family. We won't be here much longer, and I don't want you implicated in anything."
The gargantuan wookie lifted her off the ground with his enthusiastic affection then took off into the woods. It wasn't long before she felt the presence of her Master.
Siri stepped away from the tree and met him. "It was a mistake to rendezvous here, Master. Kashyyk has not been touched by the war. Our presence here could…"
"Followed we were not," Yoda said simply. "The wookies prepared they are for any battle. Your cover protected. Safe here, you are. Speak with you, I must."
"You mean check on me," she replied bitterly. "I explained to you why our meetings have become infrequent, Master Yoda. You'll have to trust that I know what I am doing."
"Trust that the Force is with you, I do. That you use that, I am not certain."
"I'm here, aren't I?" She looked away from him. "I haven't been home in months."
"This assignment, a burden to you it is."
"I am tired, Master!" she exclaimed, her expression weary. "Do you have any idea how hard it has been to put up a pretense of abhorrence for you and the rest of the Order?"
Her voice dropped low with fatigue and frustration. "I…I want to go home. I want to stand beside you and my friends for the Republic. Instead, I'm fending off Palpatine's revolting overtures and immersing myself in lessons from Dooku."
"Stand beside us you do. Your mission important it is."
She shook her head, tears of misery gathering in her eyes. "You don't know what it's like, Yoda. You can't imagine the amount of…I don't know."
"Sense this conflict within you, they must. Strong you have always been, Siri. Patient you must be if you are to succeed with what we have planned."
Her face crumpled and she cried, "You need to know…" She wiped her cheek briskly, but the tears continued to fall. "I actually considered staying away tonight, Master. I almost didn't come. I got into my ship and almost fled. I don't know where I would have gone, but…I did not want to face you."
"Yet here you are. You are stronger than you think. The Dark Side cannot claim you. The Force flows through you. Dooku knows it; Palpatine wants it. The decision to give in to your fear, yours it is. Be confident with your humanity, Siri. It serves you as does the Force."
"Dooku is very…adamant…in his belief I can be turned, Master. I don't think I have what it takes to fight him, and…Master, I think he knows about Obi-Wan. He hasn't said anything to me, but Asajj…"
"Learn to put aside your feelings, Siri. You must learn control. Ventress has something to prove to Dooku, she feels. Alter that, you can. Catch her method of offense, brandish it in your favor. Control her wild temper by exercising your serenity."
"You make it sound so easy, Master," she said, shaking her head.
"Look you not for the easy path. 'Tis the way of the Dark Side. To all that stands for right, the road is never easy."
She was quiet for a moment, absorbing his instruction. When she spoke again, her voice was deep with thought. "What is my destiny, Master?"
"Your future is not mine to see."
"I…I get scared, Master. When I try to see my future, I cannot help but be a little frightened."
Yoda sighed. "The future is indeterminate, Siri. Serve you no good purpose fear of it will."
"The decisions I make right now shape that future, Master."
"Yes. Be mindful you must with the consequences of your actions."
"You thought you could return Dooku to the Light. You couldn't. What makes you think I can return Asajj?"
"Faith in the Force I have," he answered reverently. "And faith in you. I think not you can make the decision for her. Influence by example you can for her. Misguided, Ventress is. Pain propelling her freefall in the dark."
"There was once so much good in her, Master. I can feel it. I don't understand how this happened."
"Anger…fear…aggression…twist the mind they do if you let it. It is knowing when to let go that can save you."
Siri walked over to retrieve her pack. She pulled out a flimsiplast and handed it to him. "These are my most recent notes."
She slung the strap of her bag over her shoulder. "Master, I do not know when I can meet with you again."
Yoda nodded. "Meditate on your progress I will."
"Thank you." She started to walk away but stopped and turned to him one more time. "Master…How is…Master Kenobi?"
He was silent. His expression told her that he did not like the inquiry. She knew why. After all he'd just said to her, he was reluctant to give her the means to increase her worry, and Asajj any more ammunition.
She would not relent. "Yoda, just this once. Forgive me my attachment. I just want to know that he is well."
Yoda took a deep breath. "Safe, he is."
"Good…good. Good bye, Master. May the Force be with you."
"Mistress Tachi."
"Yes, sir?"
"Your fate…written in stone is not…Use the Force. Guide you it will if you but listen."
"Yes, Master."
"And Siri…With whatever happens, know…Should you fall…Catch you, I will."
Siri bowed and boarded her ship.
♦
Ventress had driven Siri back to a welcomed shade beneath the rocky crest. Her swings with her lightsaber were still quick but growing wilder with desperation. She was not thinking of strategy. Her frustration mounted her rage as she was continually unable to penetrate Siri's defense.
Siri knew the power of wrath would overwhelm Asajj's physical exhaustion. It did not matter how often her blows were deflected, or how many times they hit each other, Asajj would not give up. They knew each other's skills far too well. It was obvious victory would not be decided by their skills with their lightsabers.
This is useless, Siri pondered. Try another tactic, Tachi.
Serenity. Give her serenity.
She gently Force-pushed Asajj back. "Let it go, Asajj. You cannot win."
Ventress brought her long, bony hand up and shoved the air, but Siri halted the flow with her own. The intensity of holding it between them made them both groan with the effort to keep it at bay and remain on their feet.
"You've tried your trite sentiment before, Tachi. You will not humble me with weak Jedi passivity," Asajj warned through clenched teeth.
"You'll gain nothing with hatred, Asajj. You never have. Why can you not see that?"
They dropped their hands and grunted when they flew back in opposite directions. With a war-cry, Ventress charged Siri again.
Siri held herself against the unstoppable arc of Ventress' blade. She felt herself growing agitated with guarding a position. But she was also aware of her lack of true, burning anger such as Asajj's. She would have to wear her down. Make her exhaust her energy. Then—and perhaps only then—could she again try reasoning with her.
"Fight me, blast you!" Ventress seethed, kicking her leg out to catch Siri's knee. "I will have what I want!"
Siri stumbled but did not fall, parrying Ventress' blitz with practiced dexterity. "Your plans for taking over Sidious' position is untenable, Asajj. It will never happen! You don't have to prove anything to him or Dooku. Do you understand? It's over."
"I've only just started!"
She used both hands to swing her lightsaber in a horizontal sweep.
Siri ducked and rolled, leaping to her feet at Ventress' back. Her reflexes had her parrying thrusts that came the instant she was up.
"You have no one but me, Asajj," she said. "The Sith have been vanquished. You cannot possibly think to resurrect them."
"I do not wish to resurrect them, you arrogant twit! I shall build a new Sith Order." She hacked shots at Siri's torso. "With an apprentice at my side."
"You have no one but me. I will not turn!"
"I don't want you, idiot!" Ventress spat with venom.
Siri blocked another swing at her head and stooped to sweep the ground with her leg, making Ventress stumble. Her fist caught the deep groove of her opponent's bent elbow.
Ventress' grip on her lightsaber slackened but did not release the weapon. Siri grabbed hold of the hand that held it as Ventress did hers. They struggled against one another, each attempting to out-force the other by sheer determination of physical strength.
"You have no one but me, Asajj. It's over. You will lose," Siri gritted out.
Ventress chortled without mirth, her face contorting from the effort of keeping Siri pinned. "I have you."
She used the top of her head to butt Siri in the face.
With a yelp of pain, Siri staggered back. Stars swam before her eyes, and she barely got her guard up to sidetrack the swift hammer of Asajj's fist to her ear.
"Yes, I do have you, you pious fool," Ventress choked. She used Siri's momentary disorientation to her full advantage, plowing her foot into her midriff.
Siri landed hard onto her back and coughed.
Ventress brought the hilt of her saber up, blade down. With wide-eyes, Siri brought hers nine-high. She kicked up viciously, nailing Ventress below the waist.
Ventress doubled over gasping, and Siri swung both legs to drag her down to the ground while rising above her.
She pressed her boot into the wrist of Ventress' saber hand.
"Let it go, Asajj," she pleaded. "It's over."
"Never!"
Her nimble fingers twirled the slender hilt to swipe the blade of her saber at Siri's side before she could protect it.
Siri shouted, echoing across the wide prairie, as leather gave way for the tip of the red sword to break the skin beneath her ribs and whip a scalding line down her hip.
Ventress swiped again, but Siri dove off to the side and was missed.
Tachi's breath was ragged from both exertion and her new wound. Blood seeped from between her fingers over the gaping rip in her torso.
Ventress pounced on her with renewed vigor.
"Don't fret, Siri," she scoffed, chopping at Siri's weakened guard. "Soon Kenobi will arrive."
Siri was already losing energy.
Focus, Siri, she told herself. Forget the pain.
Crush her.
Ventress feinted with her saber and slugged the wound she'd made.
Tears came to Siri's eyes and more blood shot out of her mouth, yet she remained on her feet.
Ventress cooed, "I won't kill you until he arrives. The grief will show him for the sentimental fool I've always known him to be, and he will be all mine. I mustn't spoil his surprise."
Siri's gaze narrowed with dark impatience, and Ventress frowned.
With a bellow of rage, Siri adjusted her stance and jabbed her fist straight into Ventress' eye.
It was her turn to attack.
Her movements were undisciplined and yet she managed to maintain the rapid force of her blows to the Sith's bald head. She punched and pummeled every bit of open space on Ventress' person.
Asajj would have no chance of recovering from her surprise. All she could do was try to protect herself against Siri's swift retaliation.
The surge of dark power through Siri was not unrealized. She would use it. She had to.
She would not allow Ventress to provoke Obi-Wan.
The gold blade of her proudest possession snapped and pivoted with extraordinary accuracy as it stole the digits of Ventress' right hand then reversed to sever the radial nerves of her left forearm.
The gnarled fingers still clasped the hilt of her lightsaber as it hit the ground. Ventress fell to her knees, crying out, and trying to clasp her maimed hand to her chest with her numb left. It hung useless at her side.
The expression on Siri's face was lethal as she glared down at her. Her chest heaved, and her injury spewed fresh fluid.
"Do it!" Ventress cried. "Kill me!"
Siri wanted to entertain the notion, but wouldn't. She couldn't. Ventress kneeled in the dust, defenseless and without aid. It would be murder. Her death was unnecessary. It would accomplish nothing but more waste of precious life. She had a reverence for it, especially Ventress'.
It could have just as easily been her were it not for her faith in the Force, the guidance of Master Yoda or her own self-respect. There was nothing Asajj could do now but surrender. She would be taken back to Coruscant to be treated for her injuries and to stand trial, but she would never again have the opportunity or ability to create mischief. The staunch supervision of Jedi Knights would see to that.
And the Light had won. Siri had managed to channel the anger and the pain into the Light Side of the Force. Master Windu would be pleased to know his influence of training had not been ignored.
She kicked Ventress' weapon far off and over the edge of the ridge within feet of them.
Siri coughed, and an agonizing blaze of fire seemed to erupt in her chest. She was starting to see two images of her nemesis. She was getting dizzy.
She shook her head in effort to halt vertigo.
"It didn't have to be this way," Siri wheezed, trying to concentrate.
Her body started to sway, her feet suddenly heavy and difficult to raise.
"You leave me here for Kenobi to murder!"
Siri could not stop staggering, the ground beneath her seemingly unsteady.
She tried to wet her suddenly parched lips. "Obi-Wan…Jedi…his life."
Her own voice was drowned out by the roaring in her ears. "Precious…he won't…"
She lurched, her eyes rolling back into her head as she fell over the cliff.