A/N (Please read this one): This chapter is rated M for sexual content. Seriously. Very adult explicit sexual content, and if you are under 18, you might want to consider not reading it in its entirety. If you get uncomfortable at any point, you can stop and I promise you won't miss anything essential at the end of the chapter. So, without further ado...

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Sirius couldn't breathe. Remus was in front of him, their lips maybe a centimeter apart, and part of him wanted to close the space between them while the other part wanted Remus to do it because he couldn't be sure if Remus was just letting him or if he actually wanted Sirius.

His lips trembled and he could feel Remus's breath hitting them.

"I can't," Remus breathed.

Sirius opened his eyes. He almost couldn't focus on Remus's because they were so close.

"I can't tell you stop," whispered Remus, his eyes not leaving Sirius's. "I want you to kiss me."

They watched each other, moving closer much too slowly. It became too much for Sirius, who closed his eyes and leaned the rest of the way forward, brushing Remus's lips with his at long last. It was short, shorter than Sirius wanted it to be, but when they pulled away it was still only inches apart.

"You love me?" Remus whispered.

Sirius nodded. "You love me back? You're sure?"

Remus nodded too, closing the distance between them again for another quick brushing of lips while one of his hands found the back of Sirius's neck, the other positioning itself on his waist.

"You're sure this is what you want?" Sirius asked.

"Yes, Sirius," Remus whispered. "I've been in love with you since the first day I met you."

Warmth filled Sirius from top to bottom and he went for Remus's mouth again, still gentle but a bit less hesitant, and this time he held the kiss for longer. Remus's grip got firmer where he held Sirius's neck and waist, and in return Sirius wrapped his arms around him, holding him close like he wanted to for so long.

He kissed Remus more and more passionately, using his lips to open Remus's and slide his tongue in. Remus slid his tongue along Sirius's, stepping even closer and pushing their lips even more together.

It wasn't like kissing Rebeka or Rhonda, and it wasn't even like kissing Lennie. Sirius couldn't get enough, he wanted more and more—more and more kissing, more and more skin contact. His body reacted immediately and he couldn't control his mind's wandering to more than just kissing. He wanted Remus so badly, he'd wanted him for so long. He'd fantasized about this so often and it was finally happening and he wondered how much would happen.

"Remus," Sirius murmured, pulling away and stroking his face. "I...I love you. I don't want to..." His words were cut off when Remus kissed him again, brief and chaste.

"What?" he said breathlessly, running his fingers though Sirius's hair. "What is it?"

"I want to..." He kissed Remus fervently and nudged his body against the other boy's, hoping he'd get the message. "I don't want to pressure you," he whispered. He stroked Remus's face again. Merlin this boy was so beautiful. "I don't want to do anything you're not ready for. Just tell me when to stop, tell me how far you're ready to go..."

Remus kissed Sirius, pressing his own body against his and Sirius couldn't control the moan that left him. "Take me all the way," he whispered, holding the back of Sirius's neck and rubbing small circles with his fingers. "If you want to, if you're ready for it...make love to me, Sirius. I want you in every way. I want you inside me."

Sirius moaned again and kissed Remus, hard. Remus kissed back, matching his passion, and wrapped his arms around Sirius's neck. Sirius moved his arm down Remus's back, pausing kissing him so he could reach behind his legs and lift him up, carrying him to the luxurious king-sized bed that the cot had transformed into. Sirius laid Remus down on it as he climbed over him and they spent a moment just looking at each other.

Remus was smiling at Sirius, his chest moving up and down beneath his tattered robes as he breathed more heavily than normal. Sirius flopped down beside him on the bed, stroking his long brown hair. "You're so beautiful," he whispered.

Remus laughed. "Me? You're the attractive one."

"I think you're beautiful," Sirius said. He traced his thumb over Remus's cheek, and Remus closed his eyes, turning his head so his lips brushed Sirius's knuckle. "I've always thought so."

Keeping his eyes closed, Remus kissed his way down Sirius's hand, wrist, and arm, leaning over him so their mouths met. They kissed slowly, savoring every millimeter of contact between them, exploring each other's mouths, Sirius guiding Remus's tongue and lips. He found the front flap of Remus's robes and unbuttoned it. Remus helped take his arms out of the sleeves and then unbuttoned Sirius's robe. Sirius waved his wand and both sets of robes vanished. Then they unbuttoned each other's shirts, occasionally looking up to make eye contact and exchange shy smiles.

Sirius got Remus's shirt off first and spent a moment staring at his chest. He could see the scars, all of them long—Sirius knew the little cuts healed without scarring—all over his chest. He traced them, first with his fingers and then his lips and tongue, while Remus trembled under his touch and ran his hands up and down Sirius's sides and back. Sirius kissed up Remus's neck back to his mouth, where his lips stayed for several minutes as their hands explored each other's bodies.

As Sirius's hand ran down Remus's stomach, following the path of soft hair below his belly button, it reached the seam of his pants, which he traced. Remus wanted him to, didn't he? He'd just said he did...

Still kissing Remus gently, Sirius lowered his hands until he found the button of Remus's pants, which he slowly undid. He then unzipped the pants very carefully (there wasn't as much room in the front of Remus's pants as Sirius guessed there usually was, and it brought him a thrill to know that he was the cause of that), and removed them, Remus helping.

Remus pulled away to look up at Sirius, smiled at him shyly, and then started on Sirius's pants. He kept Sirius's eye throughout, his expression asking permission and making it clear that he would cease the moment Sirius wanted him to.

Sirius didn't ever want him to stop. He'd thought he was already as hard as he could get, but every time Remus's fingers brushed his erection through the material he got even more aroused. He wanted these pants off now, he wanted Remus to touch him, to...well, to be honest, he truly wasn't sure what they would do. His fantasies and dreams had never gotten past nude fondling, but Sirius thought there had to be more to it than that. Remus had said he'd wanted Sirius inside him, but that wasn't possible, was it? Remus was a boy. He must have just meant it as an expression, right? Between men and women that was the most intimate thing they could do, so by saying it that way Remus indicated he wanted the most intimate thing possible between them.

Sirius lost his train of thought then because Remus had pulled his pants down and begun cupping Sirius's hard-on through his underwear. He'd never felt anything like it before. It couldn't even be compared to touching himself; it was so much more than that. Sirius murmured in pleasure at the contact, closing his eyes involuntarily and clutching Remus's arm.

"You like that?" Remus asked softly.

Sirius nodded, unable to speak.

"You mind if I take them off?" he asked.

Oh sweet Merlin, just the thought of it...

"Yeah," Sirius said hoarsely. "Yeah, do it."

Remus removed Sirius's underwear as instructed and added them to the growing pile of clothes and shoes at the foot of the bed. Now Remus was touching him and it was amazing and he was going to come any second if Remus didn't...

"Slow down," Sirius whispered, and Remus's hand ceased immediately. He looked at Sirius with apology in his eyes, but Sirius shook his head. "You didn't do anything wrong, I just...I'm not ready for it to be over yet."

Remus smiled as he realized what the problem was, and kissed Sirius gently. Sirius kissed back, wrapping an arm around Remus's sweaty back to hold him close. With his free hand, he reached down to Remus's underwear, slipping a hand underneath them. He felt Remus moan into his mouth as Sirius touched him, and the sound was just as arousing as anything.

Sirius withdrew his hands from Remus's underwear just enough to peel them off of him. As Remus kicked off his underwear, Sirius just stared at his nakedness for a minute and felt his arousal increase ever more. He reached out to touch again, taking Remus in his hand and staring at his face and body as he stroked him. Remus reached back to touch him again, and Sirius threw his head back, thrusting his pelvis toward Remus, toward the warmth and the touch.

Soft wet lips fluttered across Sirius's neck and chest, and Sirius giggled as Remus's hair ticked his skin. He let go of Remus's erection to push his long hair back over his shoulders, and then spent a few moments running his fingers through it, watching Remus kiss his torso. Remus began moving his kisses lower, past Sirius's bellybutton and down toward the hardened flesh he was currently stroking. He let go of Sirius's erection with his hands, moving them around to grip his waist, and Sirius watched and gasped as Remus's mouth closed around the tip of his penis.

Was that what he'd meant? Inside? Well, if it was, Sirius wasn't complaining. He couldn't remember ever feeling anything so incredible in his life: the soft wet tongue touching the most sensitive area of his body...Sirius couldn't control his moaning. He would come soon, he knew it, and he hurriedly reached for Remus's erection again, finding it and stroking it fast. He wanted Remus to come with him. Remus moaned around him and Sirius responded with a moan of his own; the vibrations from the sound nearly sent him over.

"Sirius," Remus murmured, pulling his mouth away and looking up at him. His face was flushed and sweaty and so attractive. "You're going to make me..."

"Isn't...aren't I supposed to?" Sirius asked as he let go, slightly disoriented from being so close to orgasm and then being pulled back from it.

Remus smiled. "Not yet," he whispered. "Not unless this is as far as you want to go."

"We can go further?" Sirius whispered back, running his fingers through Remus's long sweaty hair. "What do we...?" Suddenly he felt foolish, and his embarrassment put a bit of a damper on the mood. Here he was, about to lose his virginity with the love of his life, and he didn't even know how it was supposed to go. The puberty book his parents had had Kreacher deliver to him when he was ten didn't cover gay sex. "Have you had sex before?" he asked Remus.

Remus burst out laughing. "Of course not!" he said. "Who in the world would have me?"

"I would," Sirius murmured slightly defensively, kissing Remus to prove his point.

"Yeah," Remus said when they pulled back, running his fingers through Sirius's hair. "I know you would...now."

"So..." Sirius felt awkward, he couldn't help it. Touching Remus naked was different from talking about it. "...if you've never done anything like this before...how do you...know...what to do...?" He trailed off, not catching Remus's eye.

Remus gave him a chaste kiss full of affection. "Sirius..." he said, tilting Sirius's chin with his finger so that they were looking at each other. "...not everything I read is a textbook. And this room...well...if you're feeling curious about something and there's a book that exists on the subject, it'll be in that bookshelf within the minute."

"You are not telling me that the Hogwarts library has books that describe gay sex," Sirius said, staring at Remus.

Remus giggled. "They're not library books, no; I don't know how they got here. But..." he smiled mischievously, an expression Sirius had never seen on him before, "...they definitely kept me entertained on nights when you were away or doing homework. I would read them and think about you and me, and...well...there were definitely times when I was grateful I had this room all to myself."

Remus had...touched himself...thinking of Sirius? The idea of it certainly restored Sirius's erection to its former state. He remembered the time he'd heard him murmur his name in his sleep.

"And did you...?" Sirius asked, watching Remus's gorgeous eyes, "...did you ever dream about me?"

Blushing slightly, Remus nodded. "All the time. I would get so scared you would wake up and know what was going on, especially at first...but it was worth the risk to be able to sleep with you."

Sirius smiled. "I did wake up, a couple of times," he admitted. "And I felt so bad for watching you, but I couldn't help it. You said my name once," he added, and Remus's blush got deeper. "When I stroked your hair during your dream. I told myself it wasn't connected to what you were dreaming about."

Remus wasn't catching his eye, and Sirius's smiled at his embarrassment—it was cute.

"Did you ever wake up while I dreamed about you?" Sirius asked, out of curiosity as much as desire to get the focus of Remus.

Remus nodded. "I never knew you were dreaming about me, though. You never said my name. For awhile I thought you were dreaming about Rhonda, but then you told me you were gay and then I wasn't sure..."

"Always you," Sirius murmured, running his fingers through Remus's hair and kissing his temple. "Always."

Remus smiled at him and they started kissing again, somehow tenderer than before now that they'd mutually opened up even more about their feelings for each other. Hands roamed over bodies, on chests, arms, and backs for a moment before getting braver and going for each other's erections again.

"So..." Sirius said, shivering as Remus touched him and trying to form a sentence with all the right words in the right order. "Are we...I mean...what do we...what exactly are we going to do?"

Remus kissed Sirius gently. "Do you know a lubrication spell?"

Sirius nodded. There had been one in his puberty book in one of the many sex chapters, and though he'd slammed the book shut after reading what the spell was used for, he'd never forgotten the incantation or wand movement. "I've never practiced it before," he admitted, "but it's supposed to be a simple spell."

"All right, well try it, and if it works, put a little bit on your fingers."

Sirius grabbed his wand from the floor, where it had fallen during their kissing, and did the spell. More came out of the tip of his wand than he'd intended, but the substance was very smooth, odorless and colorless and not at all unpleasant to the touch.

"Okay," Remus said, smiling at him. He kissed Sirius again, and positioned their bodies side-by-side on the bed, facing each other. While they kissed, he led Sirius's lubed hand down his body and between his legs. "Touch me in there," he whispered to Sirius.

"There?" Sirius whispered back, looking at him. He touched the puckered opening with his finger. "You're sure?"

Remus nodded. "Go slow...I've read that it works best one finger at a time, and then..." He trailed off and gave Sirius's erection a squeeze.

Sirius had no idea how this was going to work. Even with the lube, he could barely get his finger in Remus's tiny opening; he had no idea how his whole penis was going to fit in there.

However, the thought did excite him, and he trusted Remus. For a long time they just kissed and touched each other gently as Sirius slowly stretched Remus open.

"They say it gets easier in time," Remus told him, stroking his face as Sirius removed his three fingers and did the lubrication spell again and this time covered his trembling hard-on. "If we...er...do this...often enough, my body will get used to it and need less preparation."

"Okay," Sirius said. That was all well and good for the future, but what about now?

Remus lay down on his back and spread his legs open, and Sirius climbed over him, positioning himself. His hands and knees were on the bed on either side of Remus, his arms straight so his face was a few feet above the other boys and their pelvises were just inches apart. He could feel the blood pounding through his body—and could feel it especially in one part of his body in particular. Remus was beautiful before him, breathing fast but not as sweaty as before, his erection lying on his stomach as he stared at Sirius.

Sirius had never felt so much anticipation in his life, he'd never been so excited in his life, but at the same time he was a bit apprehensive.

"Remus?" he asked quietly.

"Hmm?" Remus said, running featherlight fingers up one of Sirius's arms.

"Is this...going to hurt?" His puberty book had said that it hurt for girls the first time, and from what he read, a girl's opening would be much larger than this.

"I'm not scared," Remus said. "I trust you. You won't hurt me on purpose. And it's supposed to feel really good—for both of us."

"Okay," murmured Sirius. He and Remus each put a hand on him and guided him to the lubricated entrance.

And Sirius couldn't get it in at first. Not all of it, anyway. The tip started to go in, but he encountered resistance. Which was really all well and good because it was so much sensation he didn't think he'd have been able to keep himself from coming if it had all gone in at once.

They both took a few deep breaths, getting accustomed to it, and then Sirius pushed further.

Remus bit his lip.

"It hurts, doesn't it?" asked Sirius. "Are you sure you want to keep going?"

"Yes," Remus insisted. "I want this more than anything. I never in a million years thought it would actually happen and if you weren't calling me Remus I'd think this was just another dream, but I've wanted you to make love to me ever since I knew what making love was."

Sirius decided not to argue with that. He forced himself to calm down (Remus's apparent discomfort did assist in bringing him down from the edge), and then pushed in the rest of the way. He watched Remus's face as his expression adjusted from strained to relaxed, and he nodded at Sirius.

"Can I move?" Sirius whispered. It was agony not to. There was so much pressure but no friction, and he desperately needed friction.

"Yeah," Remus murmured, taking one of Sirius's hands and squeezing it. "Go ahead."

Sirius pulled out slowly, trembling at the sensations taking over him. He forced himself to breathe and then went back in again, still watching Remus, who smiled at him encouragingly.

"This is good for you?" Sirius asked hoarsely. He knew how it felt for him—he'd never felt anything like it before. There was so much movement and pressure all around him that he didn't think he'd be able to hold on for much longer.

"Touch me," Remus said, guiding Sirius's hand between their bodies to his penis, which had lose some of its volume while Sirius had been preparing Remus. Sirius took it in his fist and stroked, and it soon came back to life. "More," Remus murmured, leaning his head back and closing his eyes in bliss.

Focusing on Remus's pleasure, though the sight turned him on, kept Sirius from coming too soon. After a minute of stroking Remus he began moving inside him again, squeezing with his hand and trying to recreate the sensations that he felt from Remus's arse around him.

"There's a gland," Remus explained. "Inside somewhere...it's called a prostate, and apparently when you touch it...it's like nothing else."

"This is like nothing else," Sirius said, kissing Remus's scar-ridden chest. "Merlin, Remus, you're amazing. It feels...fuck, it's so hard to restrain myself."

"You can come if you want," Remus said. "I'm close; one of us can finish me after you're done."

"No," Sirius objected. "No, if there's something that feels good inside you then I want you to feel it. Isn't that the point of this kind of sex?"

"You already feel amazing," Remus sighed, wrapping an arm around Sirius's waist to bring their torsos closer.

Sirius smiled and leaned down to kiss him. They shifted the angle of their bodies to allow for this, and suddenly Remus cried out.

Sirius panicked. "What is it?" he asked quickly, freezing. "What's wrong? Did I hurt you?"

"N-no," Remus stammered, squeezing Sirius's arm so tightly he could feel his fingernails digging into his skin. "You...you found it. The spot. Holy Merlin, Sirius, I practically just came—I might've if you hadn't stopped."

"Hell," Sirius muttered. "You had me freaking out for a second, Remus."

"Sorry."

"Don't be," Sirius said, shaking his head. He leaned down again, trying to recreate the angle, and thrust again. It took a few tries, but once again Sirius heard the cry and felt the clench that meant he'd hit Remus right there...he tried to memorize where he was, exactly how it all felt, but it was impossible. He was so close to coming and Remus was so close to coming and there was all so much everywhere...he let loose and let instinct guide him as he plunged in again and again. Just as he felt it about to take over him, a warm sticky substance exploded against his stomach—he didn't even have time to process what it meant as he tumbled over the edge into oblivion.

The most incredible orgasm he'd ever had, but better. Remus all around him, Remus everywhere. Remus's body against his, so much heat and pressure.

Sirius collapsed on top of Remus, breathing as hard as though he'd just run a marathon and feeling a rapid heartbeat to match.

For a moment his lungs and heart were all he was aware of. Then the skin...he was pressed against Remus from torso to toes, his head on Remus's chest and Remus's feet grazing his ankles. Then there were fingernails...fingernails running along his scalp. He smiled against Remus's soft chest hair and if his eyes hadn't already been closed he would have closed them in pleasure.

"I love you, Sirius." A quiet whisper.

Sirius smiled even more broadly, and managed the effort to lift his head from Remus's chest and look into his dazzling eyes. He brushed a stray hair out of one of them.

"I love you, too."

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A/N: This is the very first somewhat-awkward-teenagers-losing-virginity sex scene I've written, so if you have any constructive feedback (positive or negative) about it then I would really appreciate it. Thanks for reading!