The Road Ahead

The air had gotten a lot colder since we had left Costa del Sol. We started heading out on the path leading towards the mountain trails through Corel. I'd already been feeling a bit of tension since we'd left although, thankfully, it hadn't gotten any worse. Barrett remained fairly silent over the decision that we head through to Corel and we'd taken note of it, yet said nothing.

The other point of tension was Oswin. He himself wasn't causing any unease, not intentionally anyway. He was friendly enough, he was being very approachable and open to anyone who wanted to talk to him. Admittedly that wasn't very many of the group, so he would approach them. Most were short, brief talks, where he would note a discomfort and back off. I thought that's probably where much of the tension stemmed; he was being too approachable and too friendly. All they knew was that he was a doctor under employ of Shinra. I knew that, too, and the fact that he was previously employed by Oblivion.

It had been a couple of days since we had reached the mountains and this morning we began our hike across the trail. It was a fairly well used path that would take us right through to Corel. I'd not mentioned it to the others but I'd felt an odd ringing in my ears since we had headed out of town. Maybe ringing wasn't the best way to describe it.

Even as it was getting colder I noted that Oswin dressed more casually for the weather and much differently from his professional attire. A purple plaid flannel shirt hung loose over a light grey top, darker grey cargo trousers and black combat-esque boots to go. Attire wise he did seem pretty prepared for a long journey but it still made me wonder why he wasn't taking the chill as badly as the others. Yuffie, for instance, wasn't really happy with the temperature drop.

Yuffie really wasn't taking to Oswin. Actually she wasn't talking to him at all. She wouldn't even give him the time of day. She had also made the decision to ignore me, although now she had been easing off the silent treatment as we made the ascent.

"Ugh why does it have to be so cold?" She whined to no one in particular. We were both hanging at the back of the group; I was checking our backs for anyone following.

"Probably because it's winter," I replied.

"Okay, smartass," she responded with a roll of her eyes. I sighed and rolled mine as well.

"You know, in my experience, talking about why you're pissed off is better than bottling it, or being passive aggressive," I told her, briefly thinking about the conflict between New Yevon and the Youth League. Of course that was a larger, and more political, scale, but it was still something that was solved through discussion. And Yuna's influence.

"Nah, I'm good," was my answer. I sighed and shook my head.

"Are you really pissed at me for letting Oswin join?" I asked.

"Uh, yeah," Yuffie said with the sass dripping off her tongue. "He's Shinra. You know, the bad guys we're fighting against. How can you be so cool with that?"

"It's not the best of circumstances, but I am taking responsibility if things go south," I replied. "I wouldn't have done it if I didn't have a good feeling."

"So you've got a good feeling on this guy?" She asked, all the while clearly not believing me.

"You know yourself; trust your intuition. It's rarely wrong," I said. "My intuition is saying that he's genuine, and that he doesn't have any loyalty to Shinra. If that turns out to be wrong, that's on me."

"You betcha it is," Yuffie adjusted the bag on her shoulder. "It's annoying that you think he's not with Shinra."

"Well we took your word when you said the same," I couldn't help but smile slightly when she couldn't come back with a remark because, well, I was right. "Believe me, it'll be fine."

I looked ahead at the rest of the group, everyone in smaller groups having chats or keeping themselves to themselves. Cloud and Angel were up the front having a stilted conversation. Barrett and Oswin were both keeping quiet and Tifa, Aerith, and Nanaki talking amongst themselves while Yuffie and I talked. I didn't want to intrude on the conversations but I wondered what they talked about. I couldn't fully hear them; the ringing was getting worse, far worse.

It was becoming something more understandable though. Wooshes of air, loud like gusts, settling down and rising again. I was starting to make out other noises but I was straining to make any sense of it. They all started to congeal into the one mass of noise that I couldn't understand. It was constant and persistent. I closed my eyes, hoping it would ease off, but it only made it worse. It was like a migraine. My head was close to bursting. It'd come on so suddenly I wasn't sure what was happening. I breathed in and pressed a hand to my temple. I could hear someone asking me questions and I was focusing on it, trying to make out what they were saying. It was... familiar. I recognised that voice.

"Christie," I felt a hand on my arm and I opened my eyes. Tifa was right in front of me. I looked around the group, who'd all stopped to look at me. "Are you okay?"

"Yeah. I'm fine," I nodded. "Just... just my..." I motioned to my head.

"Do you feel nauseous at all?" Oswin asked. I shook my head. "How about dizziness?"

"No, no nothing like that just..." I couldn't describe it. My head was killing me but it wasn't just that otherwise I'd not make a deal of it.

"Cloud," Aerith spoke up. "I think we should rest for a bit for Christie's sake."

"No I'm fine," I tried to say but Aerith shook her head.

"No, it's okay," she told me before looking back to Cloud. "An hour should do it. Please?"

A pause of thought.

"Okay, we could probably use a break," Cloud said. Aerith came over to me and took me aside to sit by some trees just off the path. She opened a flask of water and handed it to me.

"It's a little overwhelming, I know," she said as I took a drink. I furrowed my brow and knew what she meant immediately.

"The Planet?" A nod of confirmation. "Is it normally this bad?"

"It's a lot more than what I was used to back in the church," Aerith nodded. "But the first time I heard it there it was like that: my head was close to bursting and I couldn't understand what was happening. I've been hearing the Planet a lot more since we left Midgar."

"Does it not kill your head?" I asked.

"Sometimes, but it's like white noise now," she said. "It gets easier to work with over time. You can close your mind off to it so it doesn't swamp you at every turn. Some voices can break through to you, though."

"Like your birth mother?" I said. Aerith nodded and I turned my head and leant against the tree. I didn't say anything I just... I just started thinking.

I thought about Spira, the Farplane, the Summoners, and the Sendings. I thought that some of that knowledge could apply to my apparent Cetra abilities. If these people really descended from those of Spira then it would make sense that it would. It was still odd that I was considered a Cetra, or an Ancient, and I hadn't really given myself time to fully think about it or talk to Aerith about the whole thing. Perhaps there was some residual knowledge from Spira that would help me understand the Cetra and their abilities and hopefully archives that would further elaborate on their history; the history of this Planet.

I thought about the Lifestream and how it was the voices of the dead trying to speak to Aerith and I, far different from the Farplane and the way Pyreflies worked. Pyreflies would react to the memories of the living, bringing projections of the dead for us to speak to but couldn't speak back. The Lifestream was the dead trying to speak to the living, trying to tell us something. It felt vaguely similar to the Unsent but, if they were already part of the Planet, it meant that they had already accepted their fates and moved on from the realm of the living. Enough of their conscious being was preserved there, enough to be aware and try to speak to us for whatever purpose. I couldn't make out the words but, in time, maybe I could understand what they were trying to say.

"You hear your mother now?" I eventually asked when I came out of my thoughts.

"Yeah, over everyone else," Aerith nodded. "She told me to be wary of what Hojo said, not long after we left Costa del Sol. He's only after his own interests." She shifted her weight, thinking about her next words. "I don't have any good memories of him but she remembered more than I did."

"You knew Hojo?"

"He... kidnapped my birth mother and I. We were trapped in Shinra Headquarters until I was seven," Aerith began. "My mother carefully planned how to escape, where to hide, where we should go once we left Midgar. She wanted to go back to the Icicle Inn in the north but was scared it wasn't safe. I don't know where exactly she planned to go when we escaped. I never got the chance to ask. She got injured during the escape... and she died in the Sector Seven Slums."

"I'm sorry," I said. It was really all I could think to say. "Is that when your adopted mother found you?"

"Yeah, she was waiting for her husband returning from the war," she said. "My birth mother asked her to take care of me, and she did. She kept me safe and treated me like her own daughter."

"Does she know that you're an Ancient?"

"Yeah, she always knew."

"What did they do with her body- uh, your birth mother's body... what was her name?"

"My birth mother was Ifalna. Elmyra is my adoptive mother," Aerith clarified. "I... don't actually know what they did to her. The only thing I have left from her is this." She reached into her hair and, from the ribbon, showed me a beautiful white orb. I stared at it in awe, seeing a green iridescence through it as the light bounced off its surface. "This was Ifalna's materia. She had it her whole life then she gave it to me. She told me to keep it with me always."

"What does it do?" I asked.

"Oh, nothing," was the honest answer. Aerith laughed slightly and placed it back securely in her hair. "I've never been able to use it no matter how much I've tried. But it was important to her, and I like having it with me."

"Good enough reason as any," I agreed. I couldn't say much since I had the silver orb that contained a portion of Angel's power. I didn't know how to use that, or if I even could. Mostly likely only she could use it and I wasn't exactly willing to give her it. In fact she'd not even mentioned it. Perhaps she'd forgotten, maybe not. I didn't want to bring it up. Not until Nibelheim at the very least.

I blinked and sat up a little straighter. My brow furrowed. The voices had lessened.

"Talking takes your mind off things, doesn't it?" Aerith smiled. I laughed slightly and smiled back. "It'll come and go but when we set up camp tonight I'll show you some ways I handle it."

"Sounds like a plan," I nodded. "Hey Aerith, do you think we'll be able to find any records of the Cetra?"

"I'd hope so," she said. "Shinra have been interested in the Ancients for years, so I can't imagine there wouldn't be other studies or records." She looked out at the group and gave a small sigh. "Well, there's no point just wondering. When we can, we should look and ask. That's the only way we'll find answers."

"Yeah, you're right," I look out at the group with her. I didn't really want to think about too much else at that moment. I wanted to rest before we set out again so I was ready for anything, physically and mentally. I had a lot of questions and a long way to go before I had all the answers. At that moment I needed to have a break before going forward. I didn't want to burn myself out or I'd be good to no one.