Chapter 21

When Billy woke up, Nick was still there, his arms draped over his side and his hand resting on his bruised stomach. Billy felt the urge to roll his eyes. Nick was even possessive in his sleep. However, the urge to roll his eyes was overcome by the want to stay cocooned by the older man, and stay warm and comfortable. Very comfortable. Even though he was reluctant to admit it, he felt safe...

Very safe, right until Nick's cellphone rang that was, bursting the bubble Billy had created himself. He felt Nick shuffle a bit behind him to reach his phone before he spoke in a raspy voice, "'Lo?"

Nick groaned as he heard his wife's voice, "Nick? Where are you? You didn't come home last night and I'm worried."

Nick grunted, "I'm at the hospital," he heard her gasp, "- visiting a friend," he added.

"Oh," he heard her sigh in relief, "I was afraid something had happened to you. Amy and Gary invited us to dinner..." she trailed off.

Nick managed to hold back his snort as he petted Billy's hair, earning him a scowl from the blonde, "I don't think I'll be home tonight...maybe tomorrow."

He could hear the obvious disappointment in her voice, "Not to worry, it's on Saturday... Lucas wants to talk to you." Saturday was the next day.

Nick didn't reply as she handed the phone over to Lucas. "Hey dad," his son spoke quietly, "where are you?"

"I'm at Mercy's -" Nick hesitated, "With Billy,"he added. Billy glanced up at him curiously, but Nick only shook his head.

"Is he okay -" Lucas asked hurriedly, then he lowered his voice, "- is the baby okay?"

Nick smiled softly and petted Billy again. Billy curled his lip in distaste; he wasn't some damn pet he could just cuddle if he felt like it. "He'll be okay. A bit bruised up, but he'll be okay. He's tough."

"Gee, thanks." Billy said sarcastically with a glare.

Nick chuckled, "And the baby is fine too," he said and kissed Billy's neck.

"Uh dad...you did not just do that with me on the phone!"the teenager hissed.

"What?"

"You kissed him!"Lucas hissed quietly, not wanting to be heard by him mother.

"I've done a lot more than just kiss him Lucas. I thought you did biology last year," Nick teased.

Lucas groaned and Billy swatted him. Nick just laughed.

"Oh dad you're such a weirdo - can I..." he hesitated, "Can I come see you?"he asked timidly, "I wanna meet him..."

"Um...hang on a sec Luca -" he said and put the phone against his shoulder, "Billy- Lucas wants to come visit." Billy just shrugged. "Okay, I'll come pick you up at three after school...okay, bye," he said and hung up. He frowned as Billy didn't settle back into his side as he laid back down, "what's wrong?" he asked.

"Nothing," Billy replied.

Nick sighed, "okay, let's try again without the lies this time, hm?"

Billy knew by the tone of the older mans voice that he was not messing about. Only hours before Nick had told him that if something was bothering him, he should tell him. Time to put it to the test. At least he was already in the hospital.

"I just..." he huffed, trying to find words that wouldn't make him sound like a pansy. "-It's just that your kid is coming, probably just to check out what kind of genes his sibling is gonna have - knowing I'm nothing but your breeder-whore -" he sneered, but he felt more sad and angry right at that moment. "And as true as it is, I don't like people knowing..." he swallowed and looked away. He didn't like people knowing that he could get pregnant. It was personal, and not something he shared with anyone.

He could deal with people not approving of the choices he made in life, but to have people staring at him, disrespecting him because of the child resting in his belly was not easy to deal with. Those in the old circles of his world knew that he had carried the child of Morzan and respected him for carrying on the legacy. The Italian and the Irish were all about family, and they respected that despite being so young, he'd kept his baby, on his own, and eventually taken over what Morzan had left to him.

The younger generations were different. Few had a sense of honour and their minds had been warped by action-movies and the mindless violence. They were intolerant. They didn't have values. They cared about their own asses and their money. They would leave their mothers to burn.

Soon, he would be showing too much to hide it, and he would have to tell the crew. Lucas would only be the first of many.

Somehow, Nick understood what Billy had trouble with putting into words, "He doesn't know," he finally said. "He doesn't know about Joey, or the..," The deal, "- or anything. He knows we're..." fucking,"... together, and that you're having our baby, but nothing more than that," he said and ran his fingers through Billy's short hair. He realised it was becoming a possessive habit , but he enjoyed the silky feel of it too much to care. "And you're not a whore," he said firmly.

"Then what would you call me?" Billy sneered and turned away.

Nick couldn't answer it, so instead he asked a question of his own, "Tell me Billy, how many men have had the pleasure of seeing you on their cocks?" He laid flush against Billy's back and slipped his fingertips down to rub the shallow of his hip, "How many men have seen you moaning, screaming, begging, withering, mewing, pleading for more while fucking yourself on their cocks, hm? How many men get to manhandle you? How many men gets to fuck you on the kitchen counter? In the shower? In your bed?"

A fierce shade of pink crept into Billy's face as Nick spoke. Embarrassment, humiliation, anger...

"How many men gets to fill you up with their come, and watch it run down your thighs? How many men got to put a baby in your belly?"

Billy closed his eyes, his breathing heavy and his heart racing.

"Answer me." Nick ordered.

Billy's breath itched as Nick's body crowded him, every inch of his bare back pressed against his chest. "Two...," he said quietly, "You and...Morzan."

Nick kissed his neck softly, and ran his hand lightly over his ribs, mindful of the damaged body. "Two men in..., nearly twenty-five years. I'd consider you a pretty exclusive catch...hardly a whore," he said a nuzzled him, lapping at the crook of his neck.

Billy sighed in defeat. What Nick said was true, annoyingly so, but it sure didn't change how he felt. He sniffed and rested his head on the puffed up pillow some nurse had given him.

Fuck! These hormones were going to be the last of him for absolutely fucking sure. If not him himself, than at least his reputation. He was Billy Darley for fucks sake. Nothing threw him off balance, let along actually made him -

He felt a calloused thumb wipe away the tear that slipped down his cheek. Nick didn't say anything as the tear he wiped away was replaced by another. He'd let Billy blame the hormones, but it was obvious that the boy hadn't had much caring for since Morzan died and his mother left - got shot a few years back or whatever.

He startled in surprise as Billy slipped his hand into his, and held onto him. Somehow, the simple act of holding hands was in many ways more intimate than having sex, or even kissing. Sex could be the result of lust. Kissing while having sex was an act of sequence; one followed the other. Kissing could be read as lust or affection. Holding hands could not be misinterpreted; it was a show of affection.

Billy tensed as he felt Nick stiffen behind him, his unexpected and ill thought through show of affection sure not to be received well. As he was about to pull away, Nick squeezed his hand gently. Billy breathed a little easier, feeling a little relieved. The onslaught of a new wave of emotion caused him to tear up again. He didn't even know why he was crying, but Nick's sleeve soaked up every drop like they had never been there.

A/N'; so? Gotta admit, that was not the easiest chapter to write...