The city was gorgeous at night, slipping past as the taxi wove in and out of traffic, but Jessie saw nothing. Her forehead rested against the cool window, her eyes glazed over, her hands unconsciously picking at the skin on her nails, drawing blood. She thanked whatever being might have been looking out for her that she had been able to find a cab. A slow tear slipped out of her eye and wound down her face as she wondered about what might be waiting for her at the hospital.
The flight home had been agony. The sleep she had been hoping would allay her fears and anxieties until she landed had been fitful, even after she took a pill to help. She would end up dozing for an hour or so before nightmares would have her spiralling into a panic attack. She felt sorry for the people who had been sitting around her; they must have thought she was completely crazy, alternating between crying and giggling at random points during the 16 hour flight as she worked through her hysterics. Now she felt worn down to the bone, still being on Aussie time where it was now ungodly o'clock tomorrow morning. The only thing keeping her up at the moment was an odd combination of adrenaline and worry.
"'Ere we go miss." The cab driver said as he pulled up alongside a large cube. A little innocuous at first glance, you knew it was a hospital, but it wasn't what one would have expected from one of the premier hospitals in the state. But then, perhaps that was the way it should be, using the majority of the funding on treatments and equipment rather than beautification. Beautiful grounds could be saved for the hospitals where patients actually ended up recuperating.
Snapping out of her stupor, Jessie spared only a minor glance towards the meter. Hauling out her wallet, she drew out a few bills she had grabbed before leaving the airport. It was far more than she was being charged, but as the adrenaline started dumping back into her system, and the worry began eating at her heart again, she couldn't be bothered to count out exact change. Grabbing her bag, she threw the bills at the driver and launched herself out of the cab, paying no heed as the cabbie called out to her about her change.
The halls of the hospital were bland and busy as she jogged down the halls, following the signs to the trauma center and ICU, her bag smacking her in the back as she went. The thought of the bruise she would have cropped up in the back of her brain, after the hours she had spent racing around the world. She would be sore in the morning. A shot of guilt hit her gut as she remembered just what Don was going through at the moment, and here she was belly-aching about a small bruise. "Shit." She muttered, scrubbing the tears from her eyes. She wasn't about to let Don and the others see her cry.
Taking a shuddering breath, she jogged up to the ICU's reception desk. "Excuse me, I'm looking for Detective Don Flack, I was told I could find him here? He was brought in about three days ago."
The man at the desk looked up at her, a practiced, comforting smile coming up to greet her. It was a smile many years in the making and all it did was focus her worries and anxieties into a desire to smack the man stupid. In that moment, she hated that man for his ability to smile, wanted to hurt him for his presumption that he could even begin to attempt to comfort her with a smile like that. "Are you family?"
"No I'm..." she paused, not exactly sure how to describe herself to the nurse. "I'm... I'm a friend of his. From work."
"I'm sorry, but we can only allow family to see the patients here."
Gritting her teeth, it took all Jessie's strength to not reach across the desk and beat this man's head in. After over 16 hours on a plane, fretting and freaking out, she now had to deal with this bureaucrat nonsense, just because she wasn't legally a member of Don's family? But she wasn't about to be banned from the hospital that Don would call home for however long he might be in recovery. "If you would please just look in his files, my name is Jessie Kilburne. I'm one of his emergency contacts."
Her anger only grew as the man shook his head. "I'm sorry ma'am, but its hospital policy. Only family can visit a patient in critical care."
"His family's away on vacation right now!" Jessie snapped, her control swiftly beginning to crack. "They're in the wilds of Ontario, completely out of contact, and won't be back for the next week at least!"
The man merely shrugged. "I don't know what to tell you ma'am. But hospital policy clearly states..."
"Jessie!"
"Mac!" Spinning on her heel, Jessie had never been more thankful to see anybody in her life. Racing up to him, Jessie wrapped him in a fierce hug, some of her defences slipping down as she took another shuddering breath as she held on just a shade longer than normal, craving an extra dose of marine corp. bred strength. "How is he?" she asked, pulling back. "Moreover, where is he? This shmuck won't tell me anything."
"He's just doing his job Jess, you know that." Turning to the nurse, Mac flashed the badge perpetually at his hip. "She's with me." He said, his trademark 'I dare you to argue with me' tone planting the man firmly into place. In fact, Jessie was pretty sure she spotted a slight blush coloring his cheeks
"God, I really want that voice you have there." Jessie said as she followed Mac down a hall. "You don't get questioned at all."
A weary smirk tugged at the corner of Mac's lips. "You'd be surprised." He replied, pausing before a large bay window. Jessie couldn't quite see inside, but she didn't have to, the mere fact that Mac was taking the time to stop in front of this window meant both that it was Don's room, and conversely that what she was about to see was bad. Most likely, very, very bad. "Jessie... I should warn you..."
"Just give it to me straight Mac, how bad?"
Sighing, Mac looked at her almost apologetically. "We were caught in a bomb blast. A large amount of C-4 wired to a cell phone. Somehow, I and one other man survived almost unharmed (I'm at a complete loss to explain how) but Don... Don's torso was blown almost completely open." The mere mention of his injuries had Jessie wincing, slamming her eyes shut against the mere idea of something this catastrophic happening to Don... it didn't bear thinking about. "Some shrapnel had punctured his Hepatic Artery and I had to use a shoelace to make a tourniquet, effectively shutting down blood flow to the liver for far longer than conventional medicine would like." Mac's eyes were sadder than normal as he watched Jessie's expression. "It's bad Jess. It's really bad."
Jessie thanked her step-brother for her poker face at that moment, though, admittedly, it was hardly doing her any good at the moment. Her face stony, she nodded to a point beyond Mac's shoulder. Understanding, Mac stood aside, allowing her to get a better look at the room beyond the window.
What she saw, just about killed her. Don lay on a bed, gauze covering his entire chest and stomach, tubes and wires jutting out every-which way, almost as pale as the sheets he rested under. Jessie felt her knees actually weaken at the sight, causing her plant a hand on the cool glass to keep herself upright. Turning from the scene, Jessie bit her lips, raising a hand to quell the nausea rising in her throat. How could it be possible that Don, her big, strong detective, could appear so broken and lifeless?
"It's not hopeless Jess." Swallowing heavily, Jessie looked at Mac, her eyes demanding more. "He squeezed my hand the other day."
Lowering her hand slightly, Jessie stared at him. "You wouldn't bullshit me about this would you Mac?" Mac just shot her a look. "Of course not." Turning back to the window, Jessie bit her lip. "He looks so fragile, I don't know if..."
"You can go in Jess. You should go in. He's going to need you, now more than ever." Wrapping an arm around her, Mac led Jessie into the room and up to the side of the bed.
As tears thickened her voice, Jessie whispered, "I'm afraid I'll break him Mac."
Mac didn't say a word, just squeezed her shoulders and stood with her a while, silently listening to the beeps and buzzes of the many machines hooked up to the wounded detective. Though she didn't truly realize it, Mac had pulled up a chair for her and gently sat her down beside the bed before leaving her alone in the room. Silence continued to reign throughout the room as she watched Don's chest move up and down, a continual reassurance that he was alive, that he was fighting.
Reaching out, Jessie gently clasped one of Don's hands in both of hers. The warmth of his skin against her fingers was a further reassurance of life and she thanked whoever might have been listening for that small mercy at least. "I'm here Don." She whispered into the silence. "I'm here, and I'm not going anywhere. But you need to promise me the same thing." Her voice filled with a strength she didn't feel. "You can't go anywhere Don. You can't leave. Not yet, I won't let you."
Taking a slow breath, she squeezed Don's hand gently. "You hear me buddy? I'm not fucking letting you go, no matter what happens. So whatever happens, you tell Saint Sebastian and your Archangel Michael that you can't go anywhere with them. You do and I swear to whoever's listening tonight, I will hunt you down and drag you back by your hair." Lowering her head to rest on their joined hands she let out another shuddering breath as she settled in for a long night.