ASDFGHJKLKHRGN! Sorry I havent updated in god knows how long its been! I've been meaning to and well I'm lazy. Here's the next chapter. Comment and enjoy! J
I sat comfortably in a corner in Rosie's room and let the dirty business begin. I carefully ran my finger over the skin and choose a nice spot on my left arm to begin. I mindlessly poured the box of razor blades onto the floor and grabbed the nearest one. I placed the edge onto my soft cold skin and pushed it deeper and deeper into my flesh. I slowly dragged it across my arm. Blood burst from the wound filling the room with its metallic scent. It made me dizzy but it was exactly what I had wanted. I wanted to feel again. I felt the blade pierce my skin. I felt my own blood leaving my veins and filling my mind with its delicious smell. After making three long deep slices I dropped the blade and brought my arm to my nose. The blood was tempting. I licked the red gold off my arm savoring each mouthful. I wasn't in control anymore. I was mesmerized by the taste. It was better than any candy the world had to offer.
The room started spinning and I was feeling dizzy. I wobbled across the room and plopped down on the bed. I let the surroundings settle around me. It was dead silent. It haunted me. The silence allowed my mind to wonder. My wondering mind was a dangerous place. Old memories left to rot in the back of my mind. I didn't want to live through my thoughts. I pulled my Ipod out of my pocket Lonely Day by System Of a Down automatically and ironically started playing. I dug my finger into one of the cuts on my arm letting the blood free once again. The thick dark liquid poured down my arm and onto the bed staining the light colored sheets. I feel asleep in my own bed.
"Lenny?" I jumped at the voice. I didn't expect anyone to be around. I threw my bloody arm behind my back not sure what to expect. "What are you doing?" Jordan ran over to me but I couldn't move. I was in some sort of shock. "Were you drinking your own blood?" My face was still stained from earlier. He wiped the blood of my face with his sleeves like I was a little child. I couldn't do anything but cry. I was embarrassed shocked and scared. He gently wiped away my tears. He pulled me into his arms and we sat like that for a while. Not speaking. Only breathing.
His body heat warmed me. It felt good. A feeling that wasn't forced on me by sharp objects. A real feeling. Real emotion. I wanted more. I shoved my face into his bold supporting shoulder. He smelled so good. Sooner than I hoped he pulled away from me and wiped the rest of the tears off my cheeks. He didn't seem to care that I ruined his shirt with me crying onto it. He cleaned off my wounds and bandaged them up as Rosie quietly walked in. She looked shocked, scared and confused all at once. I just wanted to get out of there. She went to her closet, pulled out an old red blanket and pillow, and tossed them toward me.
"You're not going anywhere tonight. You have a lot of explaining to do." she sat on her bed never taking her eyes off me. I caught a glimpse at the clock. The red numbers shone bright in the dark room. 1:45 AM. The only emotion I felt in a long time faded away. I was numb again. My hands were shaking so bad there was no way of hiding it. Jordan grabbed my cold hands and held them tightly in his. "I've gotta go." He saw the pain that shot across my face. "I'll be back early tomorrow to take you home. I promise." I just knew I could trust him. I didn't know why but I felt it. He left the room taking my heart and soul with him.
"You have a lot of explaining to do." Rosie didn't sound demanding but it struck fear into me. I hated talking about things that caused me pain. It makes it worse. But I had no other option. We spent the rest of the night talking. I did most of the talking. She barely said a thing. Eight AM came faster than I expected. I was so hopeful that Jordan would be there but the hours passed and I hadn't left the spot on Rosie's floor.
I fell asleep on the floor around eleven. Once I was deep in sleep heat surround me. It felt nice. So nice that I wanted to embrace it. My arms unconsciously reached out to find the source of the comforting heat. I woke up finding myself curled up in Jordan's arms. I never wanted to leave him. When he noticed I was awake he gently brushed the hair from my face and held me tighter. His own face showed no expression while I'm sure mine was burning red. Just knowing how stupid I must have looked made my face get hotter. "What time is it?" I mumbled.
"Its one in the afternoon. I brought you some clothes so get a shower and I wanna take you somewhere." I didn't question it so I grabbed my clothes and ran to the shower.
"Where are we?" I asked as he pulled me through bushes, climbing over fallen trees. An old house became visible through the thick forest. "Wow it's a beautiful place." He still remained dead silent except for the leave crunching under his sneakers. He lead me up the porch where vines lightly clung to the wood. "How'd you know about this place?" I questioned one more time before he climbed through a broken window. Not wanting to be alone I followed him. It was dark and kind of dusty inside but what else would you expect from an old abandoned home? He disappeared up the long stairway so again I followed. He climbed through another window of a bedroom onto the roof of the porch. From up there you could see over the tops of the trees all the way to the lake. I could even see Millie's house.
We sat quietly on the roof watching the sunset until it was completely dark. There were no street lamps around so every star was visible. "I used to live here. Years ago." He finally spoke after hours of silence. "I used to come up here every night when my parents were arguing. I would even fall asleep here most nights. They never seemed to notice." I couldn't help but feel sad for him. I rested my head on his shoulder. He grabbed my hand in his and we were silent again. Not the awkward silence when nobody knows what to say. It was peaceful silence.
"Run away with me." I begged. "Come with me and lets just run." It seemed like such a wonderful idea. Run away from all the troubles in my life. The memories that stalk me. Just be with him forever. So close to him. "Run with me." I whispered into me ear. I could no longer resist the temptation to touch him.
I'll be coming home just to be alone'Cause I know you're not thereAnd I know that you don't careI can hardly wait to leave this placeNo matter how hard I try you're never satisfiedThis is not a home I think I'm better off aloneYou always disappear even when you're hereThis is not my home I think I'm better off aloneHome, home, this house is not a home, homeThis house is not a homeBy the time you come home I'm already stonedYou turn off the TV and you scream at meI can hardly waitTill you get off my caseNo matter how hard I try you're never satisfiedThis is not a home I think I'm better off aloneYou always disappear even when you're hereThis is not my home I think I'm better off aloneHome, home this house is not a home, homeThis house is not a home, homeThis house is not a home, homeThis house is not a homeI'm better off aloneNo matter how hard I try, you're never satisfiedThis is not a home, I think I'm better off aloneYou always disappear even when you're hereThis is not my home I think I'm better off aloneHome, home this house is not a home, homeThis house is not a home, homeThis house is not a home, homeThis house is not a home
"I cant go back home. I cant live without you and you know its true. Just run with me." My lips were so close to his. I could taste his sweet, alluring breath. Seconds went by and I didn't leave much space for them to pass between us.