Hello there! To make up for the postponing of new chapters, here's another new one. Please enjoy :) en please review!!! I received some after last chapter, but there could be more.. just write down a few words, and be sincere, and you'd make my day :) and maybe the next chapter will be on really soon!!!

Love, Flo

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Chapter 21 – Edward's POV –

'Edward, can I come in for a minute?'

Jasper was standing in the doorway, hand still on the handle. I'd figured he'd come sometime soon. The look on his face told me he didn't like to come at all, but that didn't change the fact he was there, trying to make his point. Whatever, I'd just hear him out and then kick him out again. Staying silent, I nodded at him, at which he entered my room.

When I saw Jasper making his way toward me, now and then stopping to carefully position his feet in between the stuff on the ground, I realized what a mess it was. There were books everywhere, printed emails Carlisle had received, hand-written letters from some far away friends, papers with strategies written down on them, most of them torn or rumpled. Worn clothes were scattered around, I didn't care to wash them, I had enough clothes anyway.

Jasper had reached where I was sitting, on the floor, near the radio that was blasting some techno-kinda music. It didn't matter as long as I could put it on max. volume, to tune out the thoughts shooting through my head.

Seemed like Jasper couldn't appreciate it, because with a quick movement my radio was turned off, and silence filled the room. It was too silent for me, the already heavy atmosphere now plunging down on my shoulders like a big cloud, but as I reached for the on-button Jaz grabbed my hand. 'Don't, first we need to talk about something.'

'Fine, make it quick.'

I knew Jaz was being sincere, but ever since a couple of days ago I could just kill every one of them, even this guy, who had always been the one keeping me in check. The morning after the hunt, we had gathered and discussed the possibilities for saving Bella. Discussed.. yeah right. Every single plan I came up with, was either denied by Jasper because we would fail before we'd gotten to her, or by Jacob who'd find it too dangerous for Bella, but mostly by Alice, who's premonitions 'til thus far had showed the unavoidable death of me and my wife.

Disappointed by my so-called family, I left the room after two hours of this charade, and had been in my room ever since, sometimes disturbed by Carlisle coming in to drop off some emails saying there was no way, or an old book he'd found about the layout of Volterra, which would prove once again there wasn't any possible back-entrance to the city the Volturi might not know of. Every source of information I looked at telling me that it wasn't a possible rescue plan made my insides turn, and I had had a hard time keeping my temper. But that didn't mean I was calm at all, so I hoped Jaz would be tactical in his conversation, or he might receive a punch or two.

Jasper sat down in front of me and crossed his legs. I knew he was trying to comfort me, I felt his energy flow into my body, but it wasn't by far enough. I also noticed he was struggling with my negative mood, sadly for him I couldn't do much about that, not without help anyway.

Jaz sighed and finally opened his mouth to speak. 'Look, I know how much you're in pain right now,' I couldn't help but roll my eyes at him, but he continued, 'And I know how much you want to save Bella. Believe me, we all do,' But, I thought, here comes the but, 'but,' (ha!), 'can you please stop making up the most idiotic and imprudent rescue-plans on your own? It's tearing her up.'

I didn't even need to ask who he was referring to. Ever since that day when I had run off on my own, determined to go save Bella, and Alice had her first vision of us dying, she had had multiple others. She had told me after the first ones, but after the fifth or sixth she had given up, knowing they didn't stop me from thinking up a plan, and I had seen her growing more pale by the day. She hardly spoke at all yesterday, there was no sound of her trying to cheer everyone up. She hadn't even been to my room to command me to get some fresh air or wash my clothes. And that was a first, believe me.

Jasper was looking down at his feet as I thought back at these moments, and I took the opportunity to take a good look at him. He looked awful as well. He was paler than usual, but his posture had changed the most. He wasn't the Jaz he used to be, he now looked like he was mentally drained of spirit and energy. And who could blame him. Since Alice and Jasper were so close, he was also inflicted by my train of thoughts. For him, it must be extra hard, I figured, since he had to deal with Alice's feelings from close by, but also mine. I had heard him leave the house numerous times these past days, probably to escape the black, depressing aura surrounding the house.

'Jaz, you look horrible.' I couldn't help but say it out loud. My voice was a little crooked, I noticed. Was it because I hadn't used it much these days, or because the sight of my brother actually hurt me?

Jasper looked up, a sad smile around his lips. 'Well, I kind of feel like that you know.' And his eyes turned dark. He was thinking about the rest, because I saw images flashing in my mind, of Carlisle, Esmee, Jacob and all the others with the same worn-down expression he had. Then, he noticed I saw them too and quickly spoke again.

'You know, everyone really wants to help. But it doesn't make it easier for us when you're here locked up in your room, and Alice is wandering around like a zombie, having visions every two hours predicting the destruction of our whole family..'

I shrugged. 'Yeah, thanks, that cheers me up. It's all my fault isn't it?'

Jasper's smile disappeared and he squeezed his lips together. I immediately regretted my words. This was another thing that was making Alice so depressed: she hadn't been able to foresee the attack on me and Bella until it was too late, and she blamed herself for it ever since. In fact, I only blamed myself. For buying the bloody island, for making Bella a vampire in the first place, for not being strong enough to have left her when I still had a chance.. All her misery was essentially my fault. Because of who I was, because of my species.

Jaz suddenly moaned. 'Can you please stop? Can't you just make up fantasies about purple My Little Ponies running around on rainbows, for all I care? I'm dying here.'

This comment, together with Jaz's pained expression, suddenly made me chuckle. The corner of Jaz' s mouth started to twitch at this, and the next moment we were both rolling over the flour laughing, just carefree, lightheartedly laughing.

'Well excuse me,' I gasped in between bursts of laughter, 'but I'm afraid it won't work without your wonderful collection of winged ponies. If you bring them along next time, we can make some happy memories together.'

Suddenly there was a booming laugh audible in the hallway, and Emmett appeared, grinning wickedly. 'Do I hear some nitwits having a little intimate get-together? Let me guess, one of you just got the latest Baby Born with urinating-function.' And he went on laughing again, hitting his knees, probably very satisfied with his own joke. Jasper laughed as well, and then pulled up his eyebrows as if he realized something.

'Emmett, now that I think about it, you could join us! Don't you have that Ken-doll laying around somewhere in a hidden drawer, dressed in Tarzan outfit?' He and I sniggered, but Emmett fell silent. 'You still remember about that? Great.' He pouted. I winked at Jasper. A few years back, I had heard Emmett think about the doll, which was something Rosalie had bought for him. Because he looked so much like it, she had said, especially in that outfit. I had laughed so hard I thought I'd die, and ever since that incident was ideal to shut Emmett up.

'You do know I threw the thing away right?' Emmett sneered, and Jaz and I started to laugh at his serious expression. Then, at exactly the same time, we were silent and listening attentive. There was the sound of heavy paws approaching the house, the next moment turning into human feet, and then we heard Jacob entering through the front door, breathing heavily.

Carlisle was downstairs, and we heard him ask Jacob what was going on. Jacob was gasping for breath, but I heard the panic in his voice when he finally spoke up. 'It's the Volturi, we ran in to them, they're back.' Upstairs, we all shot up and looked at each other. What did this mean? What happened?

But then we were all disturbed again, this time by something else. Rosalie's voice was vibrating through the walls of the house. 'Alice! Alice!', she shouted. Then, the door to Alice's room slammed open and Rosalie ran over to my room, which we had already exited. Her eyes were wide in shock, but before we could ask anything we heard Alice scream, not like anything I had heard before. This time, she screamed like her limbs were torn from her body, like her skin was on fire. She screamed like a human transforming to a vampire.

Jasper sprinted towards the bedroom first, we all followed behind. Rosalie stuttered, but still at vampire speed: 'I don't know what's going on, I don't know. She just.. fell to the ground. I thought it was another vision, but her face.. so.. torn in pain. I.. I think she's dying..' And she started to sob, while we now were hovering above Alice's body.

She had her eyes wide open, but they were glazed, which meant she was still in her vision. She was moaning, sometimes screaming, and her limbs were twisting. Now and then she arched her back, at the times she seemed like in the most pain. Jasper took her head in his hands and shouted her name, but there wasn't any response. Carlisle came running in, followed by Jacob, still half naked, but he didn't succeed to wake her either. I couldn't even read her mind, the pain I felt was too intense, and there wasn't anything else bút pain, no actual images I could see.

Then, suddenly, after a good ten minutes, Alice's body froze in the middle of another spasm, and her limbs fell to the floor. Her eyes turned back to normal, and then turned incredibly sad. Jasper pulled her up in sitting position, his eyes full of question marks. But Alice wasn't looking for Jasper when she turned back, she was looking for someone else. Her eyes went through the room, Carlisle was there, Jacob, Emmett and Rosalie came back in, and then she saw me. She exhaled rapidly. 'Oh God, Edward.' And I knew. She might have been in pain, but it wasn't hers in reality. She wasn't being tortured, but Bella was.

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