Nine years, since it happened. Though I still dream about Jamie getting shot, but it's never a dream. It's a nightmare. Jamie has a job now, I babysit the kids in the neighborhood. That's how we bring in money, he rented a house. Or I should say we rented a house. I can't believe we've been together for so long, we had fights but never left each other. I told him when we get married I don't want an expensive ring, a cheap one is fine. We need to save up that money for more important things.

I sat on the couch, I made seventy eight dollars today. I wanted to get a real job, but I never was able to go to collage. Jamie went to collage though, he is a teacher. He told me he loves being with kids, I laughed at the thought. So do I.
The door swung open, and Jamie walked in. "Long day?" I asked getting up and kissing his cheek. "Every day is a long day, but its fun." He laughed kissing me back.
"That's good." I said.
"Yeah... Crys, how bout we go out to eat tonight? we haven't in a while." He ran his fingers through my long white hair. He was nervous, why?
"Do we have the money to eat out?" I kissed him.
"Yes." he replied.
"Okay." I smiled.

We went out, to a nice restaurant. Jamie opened the door for me, reminding me of the time we went to his school for prom. After we ate, he pulled out something. A little red sparkly box with a bow on it. He set it on the table in front of me. "Open it." he said smiling. I reached for the box.
"We have been together for some time, and you know that I love you." He spoke as I took the ribbon and bow off the box. I opened the box, a beautiful ring with a light blue gem sat in the box.
"Will you marry me?" he asked. I felt like crying, a few tears streamed down my cheek. I looked up at him. "Yes, of course I will marry you!" I hugged him, kissing him a million times.

We got home, as we walked in the door Lucy our cat meowed at us. She could tell we were happy. It was seven, we watched TV. I turned to Jamie. "Do you want to have kids?" I randomly popped the question. He kissed my forehead, and grabbed my hand. "Of course I do."
"My mom died after giving birth to me, I just don't want the same to happen to me..." I looked away, tears streaming down my cheeks. "It won't happen to you, I promise." he pulled my face back and wiped away my tears.

"Where are we going to have the wedding?" I asked, holding his hand tight. "I was thinking at the park, its a nice place." He smiled.
"That's perfect." I put my arms around his neck kissing him deeply.

We stayed up pretty late, then we walked upstairs and went to bed. We sleep together, sometimes that fire deep inside flickers. That desire, that I so long ago had forgotten sparks up again. I remember when it takes over, how hard it is to fight back. My heart, that's where it comes from. My mind so much better to listen to... He wrapped his arms around me and pulled me close. I sleep in my bra and underwear, he sleeps in his boxers. Skin against skin. Warm against cool, his breath on my neck making me want so much more. But I can't, not for a while. I haven't felt this since I was a teenager, the addiction. Lips, hair, eyes, body that was shirtless against my back. So good.

Soon enough, I fell asleep, my eyes closing slowly I drift off.