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Chapter 21

Dreams of Despair

Sylar sat across from Claire at dinner. He was still reeling over everything that had transpired. She wanted him? And she loved him? It was too good to be true. But the little smiles she was giving him now over her plate were helping him come to terms. He smiled shyly back. He knew Kassy and Peter were watching them with confusion. As far as they knew he had told her to be with West and she had agreed. They had no clue that everything he had ever hoped for had come true. They didn't know that the little blonde sitting across from him meant more now than any power ever could have. She was everything. After dinner everybody went to the living room to watch a movie on the big screen. Sylar chose to sit on one end of the couch so that he could lean on the arm.

He was hyperaware of Claire as she entered the room. He watched her eyes scan around and stop on him. She seemed to be thinking closely about something before marching over with an air of determination. She dropped herself right beside him on the couch and curled her feet beneath her. They turned the lights off and the movie began. For some reason, Sylar had no clue what to do with his hands. He kept them tight in his lap. What was wrong with him? His usual suave demeanor had completely evaporated. He felt like a shy sixteen year old again. He felt like Gabriel. It was extremely unpleasant. Claire's body was approximately three inches from his, but why was he nervous? They had been this close before. Hell, they had made out. What was different?

Then he knew. Before, they had been unsure of each other. Neither had known how the other felt. But now they had both come clean. He was in love with her and she was in love with him. Gathering his courage he stretched his arm around her shoulder. He felt her stiffen for a second before leaning in to him. The small movement sent butterflies through his stomach. It was a feeling of acceptance and of belonging. What the hell was wrong with him? He was the great and powerful Sylar, yet he was coming undone because Claire leaned into him? He had to-

His train of thought was interrupted when she wiggled slightly, pushing herself more into him and resting her head on his shoulder. He stared down at her and tried to regain his breathing. Yep, he was coming undone. And he was perfectly ok with it. He would give up all of his powers if it meant she would stay right here with him. She glanced up and he knew he was caught staring. He quickly looked back at the T.V. Honestly he didn't even know what movie they were watching. He was much more content watching her. He looked back down and saw that she was trying to hide a smile.

As casually as he could he adjusted himself so that her back was more to his front. He wrapped a long arm around her, holding her to him. He heard her intake of breath and saw her eyes widen slightly, though she remained looking at the T.V. He couldn't help his devious smile that spread across his face. He realized that they were now fully cuddling within sight of everyone. And he didn't care at all. He wanted them to see. Claire had chosen him, she had forgiven him, and she wasn't afraid to admit it. She was his salvation. He wanted to lean down and kiss her, but that that might be going too far.

The movie ended sooner than he would have liked and Claire got up. He noticed many people around the room staring at them. Kassy was watching with a devilish grin. Peters was part smile part irritation. Mohinder looked disgusted. As people began shuffling off to their beds, Claire turned to him.

"So, are you going to sleep on the couch again?"

For a moment he was confused. But then he realized. Oh. The couch in her room. The thought sent thrills up his back.

"Yes, I suppose so."

"Where have you been sleeping since…"

Since you pushed me away for West? "Oh, just around. Sometimes on the roof, sometimes with Kassy."

Her eyes widened. "You sleep with Kassy?"

He laughed. "Not in that way Claire. I promise we have never slept together."

"Oh, ok." She nodded, though he could tell she was fighting the emotions on her face.

"Are you jealous?" he laughed.

"No." she shot back.

As they walked to their room, Claire headed for the bathroom. Sylar dropped himself onto the couch and slid off his shirt. He considered keeping it on, but decided that he wanted it off. He was testing the waters. He placed his hands behind his head and tried to keep his heart rate normal. He heard the soft footsteps before he saw her and glanced up. She walked in wearing the same pajamas she always wore. She closed the door behind her with a click that sounded louder than it should. The tension in the air suddenly rose noticeably. This was the first time they had been truly alone in a long time. Every other time they had been outside in the open or in a room filled with people. Now they were completely alone.

Was now the part where he was supposed to leap up, throw her onto the bed, and ravage her? Well that was certainly out of the question. He wasn't some character on a T.V. show. She stared with wide eyes as she walked to the bed. She gave him a small nervous smile as she climbed under the sheets. She switched off the lamp, but the light coming through the window from the moon was still enough see by. She lay on her side facing him and he did the same.

"Do I still scare you?"

He had no clue why he asked it. It had popped into his head and forced its way out before he could stop it. She stared at him for a moment before replying.

"Yes."

He gasped and sat up on his elbow. "Really? Claire I'm so sorry. Was what I did in the living room to much?"

But she was smiling. "Sylar, I'm not afraid in the way I used to be. I'm afraid of my feelings for you and what they could mean. That's why I pushed you away. I was afraid."

For several minutes he was silent. "Oh." Was all he was able to come up with. As they lay there the darkness enveloped them and after while he heard the steady sound of Claire's snoring. He smiled to himself.

A few hours later he was awoken by something in the room. He sat up and realized that Claire was thrashing around in her covers, mumbling something. He stood up and walked closer.

"No. No, no don't hurt him. Please. Sylar, no."

He stepped back in horror. She was having a nightmare about him. Again. He reached out and gently shook her.

"Claire, wake up. You're having a bad dream."

She woke with a gasp, sitting straight up. She grabbed his hand, making it so he couldn't move away. He stared sadly at her as tears welled in her eyes.

"Sylar? Oh, I was having the worst dream."

"Yeah, I heard." He mumbled.

"You were there."

He closed his eyes. Why did she have to tell him this?

"Samson was hurting you. Torturing you actually."

His eyes snapped open as he looked at her. She was still wiping away tears.

"So you... you were dreaming that someone was hurting me?" asked, relief washing through him. He collapsed onto the bed with a short laugh.

"Yes, what did you think?"

He glanced sideways at her. "Well, you were saying something like 'No no, please Sylar no' so I assumed…" he trailed off.

She stared for a moment before gasping and crawling closer.

"Oh Sylar, no. I haven't had a nightmare about you in a long time." She wrapped her arms around him and pressed herself closer. He was acutely aware that she was pressed to his bare chest. It felt nfice. He wrapped his arms around her and kissed the top of her head.

"Will you lay here for a little while? Just till I fall asleep?" she asked.

He smiled softly at her. "Of course."

He laid back and she rested with her head and arm on top of him. Her blonde hair pooled at the crook of his neck and tickled the skin. This is how he wished to sleep for the rest of his life. He could tell when Clair fell asleep by the way her breathing slowed. He glanced down and smiled. God, she was the most beautiful thing he had ever seen. He ran a finger over her face. Was it possible that he could actually have an eternity of this? There had to be some law against this much happiness. Surely the cruel world he lived in wouldn't allow him to remain this way. They would try to rip his happiness away somehow. He smirked to himself. Let them try. They had to come through him.

Sylar was standing in a dark room. He reached his hand out, trying to find a light. Immediately to his right a bright light turned on. He spun to see Kassy standing with her back to him?

"Kassy?" he asked hesitantly, reaching out a hand to her. She spun around before he could reach her. Her cheeks were sunk in and thin. Her hair was stringy and dead, hanging limp around her face. Her lips were cracked and bloody and her teeth were chipped. But the worst thing was her eyes. Her usual bright eyes were dull and dead, as though her very soul had been sucked out.

"Kassy? What happened to you?" he asked, cupping her face to hands.

"He killed us."

"Who? My father? No, I said I was going to stop him."

"He killed us all. He was too powerful." Kassy moaned.

He rubbed her face gently. "No, I won't let him. I'll protect you."

Another light turned on behind him and he spun. This time it was Peter. Sylar rushed over to him. He looked just as bad as Kassy except he had cuts all over his face and body.

"Peter? Peter what's going on?"

"We couldn't stop him. Nobody could."

"That's not true. I'm more powerful than him."

"Nobody is more powerful than him."

"Yes I am!" Sylar shouted, becoming panicked. Where was he?

Another light turned on and he turned again, afraid of what he would see. He felt his heart constrict when he saw Claire crumpled on the ground. Her arms were wrapped around her legs and her face was pressed to her knees, hiding her face from him.

"Claire? Claire!"

He tried to run to her but found that he couldn't. It was as though an invisible force was holding him in his place.

"Claire, please tell me what's happening."

She looked up from her knees and he covered his mouth in horror. Half of her face was missing. He had seen gore and horror before, hell he had caused it, but something about seeing Claire like that made his stomach turn.

"Claire, why aren't you heeling?" She began to cry. "Claire, who did this to you? Please tell me."

"You weren't there. You weren't there when he lost control. He killed us all and you didn't stop him."

"I'll kill him for this!" he shouted, his furry boiling over. "I'll kill him for hurting you!"

"No!" she cried. "Please don't hurt him!"

Sylar was confused. "What do mean? He's evil! I have to."

"No!" she shrieked, standing up. "Please! Please no!"

A fourth light turned on to his left. He was suddenly very frightened to turn. He knew he wouldn't like what he saw. He turned his head very slowly. And frowned. It wasn't his father. A little boy stood in the middle of the light. He was no older than four years old with light brown hair and hazel eyes. Something about him was so familiar.

"Who are you?" He asked.

"You don't know?" Claire frowned. "Sylar, that's our son."

"What?" Sylar frowned. "We don't have a son! Claire, we've never even slept together. Trust me, I would remember that."

Claire shook her head. "Samson bred us. He created the perfect super." She said sadly.

He looked back at the little boy who smiled pleasantly at him.

"I named him Noah." Claire whimpered.

Sylar couldn't help but smile at the boy. It was his son after all. However, his smile slid off his face when the boy raised his small hand with his finger pointed at him.

"No!" Claire cried. "Please Noah, don't hurt daddy!"

The boy giggled and in his high pitched voice said. "But there can only be one God."

There was a bright flash of light before everything went dark.

XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX

Claire woke sometime in the early morning. She was momentarily startled to find her face resting on a bare chest, but as she sat up she realized who it was. He let out a small whimper in his sleep and she frowned. He was obviously having a nightmare. He reached out to touch his unshaven face. He flinched and made a muffled sounded.

"Sylar? You're dreaming. Wake up." She said as she shook him lightly.

"Claire, I'll protect you." He mumbled.

She smiled and shook him some more. "Sylar, wake up!"

Sylar woke with a cry, sitting straight up and nearly knocking her off the bed. He caught her arm at the last second and pulled her to him.

"That must have been some dream." She laughed.

He frowned, looking confused. "I… I don't remember.