Chapter 20

Bella's POV:

My feet pounded hard on the ground as I ran on the cement. There were no cars driving at this time of the night, but I had to get away from one car. I stopped by the Forks sign and scanned around the area. The sound of water running wasn't far, but I had to think of something to do. My hands went to my stabbed wound on my upper abdomen. I couldn't risk the hospital to be found out by Noah.

"Bella," Someone whimpered my name. I turned around but didn't see anyone. "Bella. Bella, help me!"

That's Maggie's voice.

"Maggie! Where are you?" I yelled. "Tell me where you are?"

There was a cracked into the air as loud as thunder but without the raw power of the storm. A girl screamed and I turned to see Maggie on the ground. Her eyes wide with fear, her arms stretched out – reached out with blood and dirt all over her. "Help me, Bella!"

My eyes shot open in the darkness of my room and I took small breathes to control my breathing. Once I got my heart rate to a normal pace, I realized that half of my stuff was up in the air. Shit. That magical ooze messed my powers up. Slowly, everything was put back into its rightful place and looked around to make sure that none of Cullens witnessed my power. But there wasn't any sound of anyone upstairs in the hallway or on the stairs. So, I was safe from vampires finding out.

After Charlie picked me up, I decided to continue my research throughout the entire day but ended up in dead ends. How did the Special Division choose their recruits? Where did they have the kids? It can't be picked on randomly. I know that they lied about finding me in a museum and the park was not a random decision. A phone started ringing but it wasn't coming from my cell phone, it was coming from the one Ryan gave me. I picked it up and didn't say a word.

"Izzy?"

I gasped. I know that voice. "Trevor, where are you?"

"I'm in Forks. I'm staying at the same motel Ryan stayed at. I went to the funeral. I'm sorry about Maggie. And I'm sorry I couldn't go near you and Ryan."

"It's alright. How did you know I would be awake?"

"You always did have troubling sleeping. Izzy, I need you to low okay?"

"Why is everyone telling me that lately?" I said as I lay back on my bed.

"I told the same thing to Xander and Ryan. It'd a good thing that you killed Bradley because Noah was furious with him once I told him the news. But then again, maybe it wasn't a good thing. I wished I could see him be canceled right in front of me." Trevor said and I could hear him typing in the background. "But right now, you need to keep a low profile and by that, I mean to live a normal life for a while."

"How long is a while, Trev?"

"A couple of weeks –"

"Weeks!" I yelled, sitting up and paused for a moment to hear if I woke Charlie up. "Are you fucking kidding me? We don't know how long it will take for Noah to take another kid away."

"I know but I know you. And I know what you did to Peter." Trevor said and surprisingly with annoyance. "I'm not going to cover for you if you are going to kill someone random or worse, someone, that does work for Special Division. Noah will figure out it was you or one of the others. I can't protect all of you. I need your word that you will press the pause button."

"Trev –"

"Two weeks, Izzy. That is all I ask –two weeks of living a normal life doing homework, making new friends, going out on a date…be normal."

I rolled my eyes –normal, yeah right. "I'll try but I am not making any promises. But I will try."

"Good and Izzy?"

"Yeah?"

"I'm sorry," and he hung up, but I know what he is apologizing for.

I laid back on my bed, with the laptop shut and tried to get some sleep but I couldn't. I'm scared that Maggie will reappear in my nightmares along with my mom and Phil accusing me, trying to help them – to save them, to avenge them. When will it end? Does it ever end?

Reluctantly, I got off my warm bed and changed into shorts and a long, plaid shirt, ready to take out my frustration and sadness to a certain punching bag waiting for me downstairs.

But my stomach made other plans for me.

I ran straight to the bathroom, not caring if the noise wakes Charlie up, as I threw up my guts inside the toilet. "Bella?" Charlie yawned as I could hear his footsteps and all I could do was a moan, still close to the toilet. "Oh boy. That is what you get from running in the rain."

"Glad to know you still care, dad."

He pressed his hand against my head. I whimpered at the touch. "You have a fever, Bells." He yelled astonished and felt his arms underneath my legs, pulling me away from the toilet. "Time to go to bed and rest."

"But –"

"I'll bring a bucket…a big one." He said and I don't remember what else he said after that because I drifted off to the darkness so quickly.

"Bella? Bella, wake up." A singing voice called out from the darkness.

"No."

I didn't want to open my eyes. I felt comfortable and peaceful in a rare moment. Musical laughter echoed.

"Bella please," The voice begged.

Wait a second…I know that voice!

I opened my eyes, waiting for the blurriness to go away and when it did, I screamed. "What the hell are you doing in my room?"

Edward laughed as he decided to move away from the shadows of my room and sat down on the edge of my bed. I pulled the covers closer to my body, realizing I did not change after I threw up earlier. "You weren't in school and I was worried. It was not until I got home that Carlisle told me that you were ill. I came with him and you had a very high fever."

"I did?"

Ow, my head.

"Why are you still here then? How long have you been in my room exactly?"

"Only an hour so far. Chief Swan asked me to stay and watch you until he returns from his shift." He explained to me, but my eyes rested on his moving lips.

I groaned once more, feeling my body shake and I noticed beautiful flowers in a vase on my desk. Those flowers looked familiar…they look like the same ones from my dream that I had when I was stuck inside that tank. "Did you bring me that? I asked him.

"You have been through a vicious ordeal and I thought, perhaps, these flowers could brighten –"

"Thank you. They are lovely." I admitted with a smile.

But then, my smile vanished as if I felt something tight in the middle of my throat and my eyes scanned around my room. "I need my best friend right now."

Edward cocked an eyebrow, amused and…hurt. "And who's that?"

"The bucket!" My hand covered my mouth as I ran to the bathroom. I felt a pair of cold hands grab my hair and put it into a high bun. I flushed the toilet and went to the sink, washing my face and teeth. "I'm sorry that you have to see me like this. I know it is not the most…a beautiful sight to see."

"Don't apologize…it is human of you to be sick."

I stiffed at that choice of words. For that moment, I forgot that Edward is a vampire…that his family is vampires. I spit the taste of toothpaste out of my mouth and my hands started to shake at the same time did the cabinets. Oh, crap.

Breathe in and out.

Breathe in and out.

I tried to walk to my bedroom from the bathroom, but my legs gave out and Edward caught me. I stared at him for a moment then to his lips. But pulled myself away, feeling a blush coming through. "Thanks. I can be clumsy when I am sick." I commented as he helped me back to my bed.

"So I have noticed."

"Can I ask you something?"

"I thought you were finished asking me questions? Yesterday was your last day." He smiled –my favorite crooked smile. "But if you must…"

"Do you believe in the supernatural?" I watched his brown golden eyes widen and he sat still in my chair near my desk that I thought he went into shock. Could vampires go into shock? "I'm just wondering if you do."

His lips parted and paused as if he is choosing his words wisely. "Do you?"

"Of course. I have always believed that there are more special… things out in the world that we need to figure out. Don't you?"

"…Yes. What do you believe exactly?"

"Werewolves…shape shifters…. witches…vampires," I hid my smile as the movement Edward made in his seat. A vampire could squirm – how cute. Who knew these questions and my answers could make him so nervous? "But I also believe that there are people in this world that have…special abilities."

"Like what?"

I shrugged, playing with my shirt and pretending to guess. "I don't know. The ability to transport anywhere you wish, fire manipulation, telekinesis, and empathy…telepathy –" Edward shot up from his seat. Did I finally strike a nerve on the vampire? "What is it? What's wrong?"

"There's no such thing, Bella." It sounded like he was trying to admonish like a father to his daughter from stealing a cookie.

But if someone told me that, years ago, I would have agreed too.

"Sure there is, Edward. You just have to believe." I said, remembering those last words when I first met Noah. His smirk on that…the pitiful face of his. "It will be awesome to have the ability to do something so amazing and extraordinary or to meet some supernatural creature."

"Why?"

"I don't know, call me curious."

He shook his head, "More like insane."

"Gee thanks, Edward. That is what every girl likes to hear from a guy."

"I apologize, it is just…do you honestly believe in that stuff?"

"I do."

Edward stared at me intensely and unpredictably, he sat only inches away from me. I held my breath, not sure, what he is going to do next. But if he attacks me, even in my sick and weak state, I can still throw him out of the window. But he put his cold hand near my cheek, barely touching it, but I could feel the electric current coming. It is something I have never felt before.

Something I cannot explain.

He pulled away, I remember how to breathe, and that my heart is still beating rapidly inside my chest. What was that? I looked at him, noticing that Edward is staring at me with his coal eyes as he stands against my wall, trying to control himself. What is going on? What is this nervous feeling in the pit of my stomach that will not go away? Why is he staring at me like that? Why doesn't he just attack me if I am getting closer to his secret?

So many questions but the answers I will not get.

"You need to rest," Edward said hoarsely looking away. "I'll make you some soup."

"Do you know how to make soup?" I asked, smiling.

He smiled back, the coal color finally is gone. "Yes, I do."

I put my hands up, smiling. "Just making sure. Charlie's second favorite place in this house is the kitchen."

I snuggled closer to my blankets, feeling cold and starting to shake even more. I know it is the fever doing this to me. Whenever I fall ill, I lose control of my abilities, which explains what happened earlier. But I can't lose control now especially with Edward in the house. It's too dangerous. I can reveal knowing his secret to him, but I'm not ready to reveal my secret to him.

I hate being sick.

Edward came back a couple of minutes later with my soup and crackers on the tray. "Thank you," I mumbled and ate in a slow and peaceful pace. But it felt weird that he's watching me eat. How are my eating habits any different than before when I did eat in front of him? "Aren't you afraid of getting sick? I am contagious."

He chuckled, "I already gotten sick. I think I will be alright in your presence."

I shrugged, "If you say so."

"You should sleep." He said but stopped in his position from standing up. "What's wrong?" He asked, noticing my hesitation.

I shook my head, "It's silly." I mumbled.

"Bella, nothing silly ever comes out of your mouth."

"I don't want to close my eyes again. If I do, I see them."

"See who?" He asked, concerned as he grabbed my tray and put it on my desk, now sitting next to me on my bed.

"The people I couldn't save…the people I've watched die." Or I have killed by my own two hands. "Even when I am awake, I still see them like at the funeral." My hands covered my mouth immediately, realizing what the meaning is behind those words. "I am not crazy," I whispered.

"I know you aren't, Bella. Maybe you're telling your subconscious that you should feel guilty because you blame yourself for not saving the people you cared about." Edward told me but I could feel the hesitation in his movements as he moved closer to my side of the bed. "Have you ever thought about seeing a therapist?"

"A shrink? Hell no!" I yelled and began coughing. Bad timing. "Now it is my turn to ask you if you are crazy. There is no way I am talking to a complete stranger about my problems again."

"Again?"

I froze, realizing my mistake. In Special Division, the Inquisitor became our shrink and a mother figure to us…in a certain way. She always tried to be a mother to us but we knew that she couldn't be emotionally attached to any of us in case one of us dies. As a shrink, her sessions became questionable, dangerous, planned, and cold. It was as if she separated that motherly tone from herself to become something Noah wants. I couldn't trust her because of that. Even if Noah denied her to be a mother for us, I could tell that she had plans for us in those eyes of hers. She'd always have a back plan with her back plans.

"Let's just say I've seen one before and it wasn't…ideal. It didn't help back then so how will it help me now?"

"I don't know but you can try it."

"No thanks." I rested my head on the side of the pillows but looked up to see Edward gazing down at me like he is…fascinated by the fact that I am going to sleep. "Can you stay here with me until I fall asleep? Or at least until my dad comes home?"

"I thought you didn't want to fall asleep?"

"And I also don't want to be a prisoner in my own home while being sick for more than one day." I bit my lip. "Please Edward?"

He sighed reluctantly but nodded his head and started humming. "That's a nice song," I murmured, my eyes slowly closing to the darkness. "What is it called?"

"Bella's lullaby." His whispered words said before I drifted away.

Edward's POV:

"Carlisle, where are you going?" Esme asked and it caught my attention away from my latest novel to see Carlisle holding his medical bag. "Is everything alright?"

"Chief Swan called saying Bella is terribly sick." He told us and for a moment, I saw my last human life moments during my sickness. "Would you like to come with me, Edward?" My adoptive father asked me. "I am sure Bella's mood will brighten once she sees you."

Emmett cocked his eyebrow at me, "Is that so?"

"Shut up," I growled and nodded my head to Carlisle. "Of course."

"Edward, wait!" Alice yelled and handed me colorful, wildflowers…from my meadow. How did Alice know where…? Never mind, I knew a long time ago to never question my adoptive sister. "Bella will like these."

"Thank you, Alice. How thoughtful of you…"

"Actually, I saw you deciding before on what to bring Bella to brighten her mood since the funeral. You had a hard time choosing."

"So you decided to help me?"

She grinned at me. "Yep,"

I rolled my eyes and followed Carlisle to his car in the garage and we left in haste. "Esme tells me that you are playing again." He spoke up.

"I am."

"May I ask what your inspiration was?" He asked me but I could hear the amusement in his tone. "Or should I say who?"

I refrained myself from rolling my eyes again. "You already know the answer to your question, Carlisle."

"Yes but I want you to admit…out loud."

I didn't say anything for a while as I stared outside of the window. Why does Carlisle want me to say it aloud? Jasper and Carlisle will be the death of me. "Bella is my inspiration…my muse to my music." I finally said. "Are you satisfied?"

"I am extremely happy…that you are happy, Edward. Esme and I have been worried about you for a while, as you know, but now we don't have to be because you have feelings for a young woman."

"But she is a mortal human being, Carlisle. You know that the only way she won't be if she is dying then she can be one of us." I explained and my hands curled into fists. "The Volturi won't allow a vampire to have a romantic relationship with a human especially if she knows what we are."

"Edward, you cannot put your feelings on hold. You must persuade them. Who knows? Perhaps Bella feels the same about you as you do for her." He suggested. But I doubt that.

We arrived at the Swan residence and Charlie opened the door, looking more tired than I have ever seen him. His thoughts only show me how worried he is about her and also…he is scared. But there is a part of his mind blocking something that I cannot read. Why can't his thoughts be more open as the other humans?

"She has a fever and been shaking for a while. I thought she was having a seizure but she stopped shaking for a while." Charlie told my father.

"Well let's see how the patient is doing. I hope you don't mind, Charlie but Edward is going to be my assistant for today."

"No, not at all."

It was a different adjustment walking inside Bella's bedroom rather than going through the window. And I know that Charlie will grab his gun and try to shoot me if he ever knew that I snuck in his daughter's room and watch her sleep. Bella was laying in her bed with blankets on top of her, shivering words and sweating.

"She does have a high fever," Carlisle commented and pressed a cold, wet cloth on her forehead.

"I'm sorry," She mumbled. "I'm so sorry."

"Hush now, Bella," Carlisle said, trying to soothe her but when his hand touched her forehead, she flinched away.

"Forgive me," She whimpered.

"I can write a prescription for her and hopefully, it will help her fever go down. Was there anything else that you could think of that could cause Bella to get sick?"

"Besides the rain? Her guilt." Charlie answered. "Ever since Maggie's death, Bella has been screaming in her sleep more times than she had when she was thirteen." The age that she came back home – interesting. "It's gnawing at her that she couldn't protect Maggie or my ex-wife."

Carlisle nodded with a small sad smile. "Edward, can you stay with Bella while Charlie and I talked downstairs for a while?"

"Of course,"

"You know what to do if something goes wrong. You did go to medical school before." Carlisle's thoughts reminded me.

I sat down on Bella's chair near her desk and watched her mumble more words in her sleep and I realized something. She is human but…I do not think Bella knows that. She thinks that everything is her fault if she did not escape then everyone she ever loved will still be alive. A teenager should not be feeling this much guilt in her young life. It is not fair.

"Hasn't anyone told you that life isn't fair?"

"Edward," She whispered. I moved closer to her breathing body and watched as her chest rises up and down. "Edward," She said this time but more passionately.

Why must you say my name like that? Does it mean something? Why could it mean?

Carefully, I touched her warm cheek, becoming more enchanted with Bella Swan than ever. "What is it about you, Bella that makes me care? You are not like any other female I have encountered." I said aloud. Charlie and Carlisle were still downstairs, still discussing on Bella's condition. "Who are you?"

"I felt happiness from her because of you. She is feeling something that she is not familiar with when she is around you."

"I can assure you what you are feeling for her is a human emotion that you shouldn't be afraid of. And that Bella will probably feel the same way you do."

"Why can't you just admit your feelings for Bella? Is it that hard?"

"I think…I do not know if you can hear me, Bella and I will be glad that you can't because I am going to admit something that I never thought I could admit to anyone." I said aloud, pulling my hand away from her cheek.

"I am falling in love with you, Bella and I do not know what to do because if I tell you what I really am…I will lose you one way or another. I don't want that to happen."

"Edward?" I turned around to see Carlisle standing at the door.

"How long were you there?"

"Long enough to know that you really care about her," Carlisle answered. "I have to go to the hospital but Charlie is also leaving for work. Do you mind staying here? Can you control yourself?"

I nodded my head and turned to look at Bella's sleeping form, "I can."

And it is the truth.

I can control myself around Bella and her scent because of the thought of losing her…it drives away my temptation to drink her.

I am in love with Bella Swan.

Who knew?

A/N: Comment please! For those of you that have read this story before, do you enjoy the improvements that I have made so far with this story?

- DisneyRBD