It's Friday evening and Scott has just arrived at Liam's house. Tonight is their film date with Mason and Brett, but Liam has texted Scott and asked if he can come over earlier. It sounds quite urgent. Needless to say, Scott's fingers are trembling ever so slightly when he rings the doorbell. He is surprised when the door's opened by someone else but his boyfriend.
"Scott, good evening."
"Oh, hello, Dr. Dunbar," the teenager says with raised eyebrows. He shifts his weight onto his other leg. "I'm…I'm here for Liam?"
Liam's stepdad nods. "Film night, right?"
"Yeah, yeah…" Scott answers, smiling sheepishly. "I'm just…early."
Dr. Dunbar narrows his eyes a little, but smirks nonetheless. "I see. Well, come on in," he invites him, stepping aside. "Liam's upstairs."
Scott moves past the man with bowed head, muttering a thank you. He quietly puts his helm on the floor and quickly dribbles up the stairs. He feels anxious, finding it curious that Liam hasn't come down to open up himself, especially since he's so worried about Scott meeting his parents and, right now, Scott feels bad that he hasn't had a chance to make a good impression on them yet. However, he pushes that feeling aside when he realizes there might be something more important to focus on right now.
His hand is on the door handle and he's about to open Liam's door when Scott debates if he should knock. For some reason he feels wrong if he doesn't, so he does.
"Scott?" he hears from the other side of the door.
Scott's eyes widen, because he immediately recognizes a certain undertone in Liam's voice. "Yeah, it's me," he says before entering. "Are you-"
But he doesn't have to finish that question when he lays eyes on his boyfriend.
Liam' has crawled himself up in a ball on his bed, back against the headboard and knees pulled up to his chest. He sniffs, wiping his nose. "I'm sorry…"
There's something in his hands that drains the colour from Scott's face; makes his blood freeze in his veins. He's next to Liam in a mere second, folding his arms around him.
"I'm sorry," Liam repeats, biting his bottom lip. He doesn't look up at Scott, but the older teen can tell from the wet streaks on his cheeks that he has been crying.
"It's okay, I'm here now," Scott mumbles into his hair. His throat feels dry, trembling hands covering his boyfriend's. "It's okay," he assures him again, gently taking the shard of glass from between Liam's fingers. It has a sharp point, but looks clean nonetheless. "Did you…?"
Liam slowly shakes his head. "I texted you instead," he mutters, sniffing.
Scott exhales a deep breath, making Liam's hair move. "Oh, Liam," he whispers, hiding the shard in the palm of his hand so neither of them has to look at it anymore. "I'm proud of you."
"I feel so bad, Scott."
The teen frowns. "…Why?"
Liam takes a trembling breath, seemingly recollecting himself. Scott waits patiently for him to start talking. His free hand is comfortingly drawing circles on Liam's shoulder. Liam has rested his forehead against the crook of Scott's neck.
"I keep thinking about you and Allison," Liam breaks the silence after a while.
Scott frowns, because he definitely did not see that one coming.
"I mean, that must have been so awful for you…" his boyfriend continues. "Losing her…"
Scott swallows, not really knowing what to say. Of course Allison's passing had been awful, but it was also in the past. Yet, he feels weird reconciling Liam over something that happened to himself. How is he supposed to the boy it's fine? That's not something you say about your own heartache. Fortunately, Scott remembers that it is better for Liam if he just listens anyway. It has proven before that Scott's words don't really come through in situations like these. He just needs to convince Liam afterwards that everything is okay: that Scott isn't upset and still likes him.
"And now I'm here, replacing her, and it's just so unfair to you," Liam continues to mumble hopelessly. "I mean, I never realized how confusing this all must have been for you…instead I was just being selfish and focused on my own problems."
Scott squeezes him a little tighter against his chest, because he strongly disagrees with that statement.
"I'm such a jerk," Liam chokes out, before he starts crying softly.
Scott continues to hold him calmly. At some point, he rocks them from side to side a little, attempting to comfort his boyfriend. There are little tears in his own eyes as well, but that's probably just from the scare. He's already glad that Liam didn't hurt himself—if anything, he's quite proud. But it's also daunting to have been faced with the facts, which are that, generally, Liam might be doing better, but that that's not an indication that it's over. Not yet. And the only thing Scott can do is listen and be there for him, whilst secretly hoping that the fear of Liam ever taking his own life will eventually become irrational and finally will completely subside. In all honesty, the prospect of it seemed like such a long process.
However, Scott decides that he needs to keep faith. He also reminds himself of his promise to focus on the good things, so he inhales deeply through his nose, settling his nerves. "You're not selfish. And you don't have to feel bad for me," he says, voice cracking a little.
Liam huffs, and Scott can tell he has stopped crying. "I know… I know that."
Scott smiles gently, because Liam's words confirm his speculations. At least Liam didn't really think of himself as a selfish jerk. So Scott simply replies, "Okay."
He loosens his grip when Liam attempts to sit up a bit more. He doesn't move from the older one's lap, though, just looks at him with bloodshot eyes. Scott smiles at him, and after Liam has wiped his cheeks dry, snorts back.
"Thank you for messaging me," Scott says. "I'm honestly really proud of you."
Liam smiles shyly, glancing sideways. "Thanks."
Scott figures it doesn't make the situation any less awkward or embarrassing for Liam, but at least they can handle it. At least Scott doesn't have to confront him with fresh cuts. Besides, he understands that Liam isn't sharing that contradicting feeling about himself right now; after all, it's just the lesser of two evils. "Do you still want to do the date night?" Scott wonders.
"Yes, definitely," Liam guarantees. "I'll just go freshen up a little."
"Okay." Scott watches the tide for a beat longer, but then releases Liam from his safe haven.
The boy presses a timid kiss onto Scott's cheek before he gets up and walks towards the bathroom. Scott allows himself to fall backwards onto the mattress, sighing heavily. He rubs his forehead, shaking the tension from his shoulders. Liam's okay. It's okay.
Only then he notices the light stabbing feeling in his hand. His eyes fall onto the shard of glass, turning it around a couple of times with his fingers. He wonders where Liam had gotten it, but doesn't dare to ask. He also doesn't really see how it would add to his understanding of the boy; it would only make things uncomfortable for Liam, so he decides not to ask him. Instead, he just puts it into his pocket, figuring that Liam has forgotten about it anyway.
A couple of minutes later, Liam comes back in. "Hey, could you give me a hand?" he asks.
Scott looks up. "Sure, with what?"
"Dragging the mattress from the guest bedroom into my room?" Liam's cheeks redden. "I figured it would be more comfortable if everyone would have a bit more space."
Scott cocks his head, unsure as to why Liam seems embarrassed by the suggestion, but seals his lips. He gets up and helps out, even though moving a mattress is the worst job in the world. Those things are like, really heavy.
Brett and Mason show up an hour later at the set time. Scott shakes Brett's hand at the front door, looking up at the tall guy. He has a strong face and…doesn't look really amused—but Scott's not one to judge a book by its cover, so instead he tries to make a little small talk.
"Liam told me you play lacrosse as well?"
"Team captain," Brett answers with a brief nod.
"Cool! Me too," Scott replies. "So how are you guys doing this season?"
He hears Liam next to him exclaim a relieved sigh, and catches him exchanging a look with Mason.
"Dude, I have to tell you something," Mason mentions to his best friend, urgency in his voice. "Someone else is transferring to Beacon High."
Liam frowns in surprise, before turning to Scott. "We're just gonna get some drinks and snacks. You and Brett go upstairs, yeah?"
Scott smiles. "Sure, no problem." He motions for Brett to follow him and the guy obeys silently.
When they are in front of Liam's room, Scott tells him to go in. "I'll be back in a sec', just have to go to the bathroom."
After he is there, he locks the door. Scott rips off some toilet paper and takes the shard out of his pocket. He folds a couple of sheets around it and then puts it back. At least now it won't stab him in the leg. He decides to just throw it into the trash when he's home.
"So…how are you and Mason doing?" Scott asks after he has entered Liam's bedroom. Brett is examining some of Liam's lacrosse trophies. "All happy and in love?"
Brett shrugs. "I guess so," he answers, upping one of his eyebrows. "You and Liam?"
Scott's ears warm. "Yeah, we're fine."
Brett nods. "Great," he says, continuing to look around the room casually.
Scott does the same, almost as if it's his first time there. "We put down an extra mattress," he points out. "You know, more comfortable and stuff."
Brett hums, a smirk on his face. Scott grins up at him, thinking Brett's unsocial behaviour is just because he's a little shy.
Mason and Liam barge in a second later. There are bags of chips and popcorn, and cans of coke in their hands and under their arm. Liam even has a bag of Doritos in his mouth. Scott laughs, taking it from between Liam's teeth. For a moment, he pauses. "You okay?" he asks in a low voice.
Liam nods confidently. "Yeah. Don't worry."
"So are you guys ready for…" Mason trails off, fishing a disc out of the pocket of his jacket.
Scott and Liam groan when they see the horror movie Mason has picked.
"Really?!" Liam asks with a helpless look on his face.
"Yeah, dude, of course," Mason answers bluntly. "Horror movies are, like, the best ones for date nights."
Again, Scott doesn't understand why, but by the way Liam's uncomfortably kicking his feet against the floor he assumes that his boyfriend disagrees.
Mason moves over to put the disc into Liam's DVD player, turning on the TV as well. Brett settles himself on the mattress that's on the floor and Scott does the same, but on Liam's bed. He takes one of the cokes and opens it. Liam watches him and Scott catches his gaze. He smiles, patting the spot next to him. Liam obliges quietly, pulling the sleeves of his hoody over his hands.
When everything is set up, Mason switches of the light, chuckling deviously before throwing himself next to Brett. Scott turns towards the screen, focusing on the movie, which starts with a house in the woods. Cliché… But then Scott understands why Mason wants to watch a horror—there's a chance one of them might get scared, which means the other gets to cuddle them. He looks over at the other couple, who already confirm that theory: Mason has cuddled up to Brett's chest.
Scott glances at Liam, who is sat in a cross legged position, which means Scott can watch him unnoticed. He bends forward to grab a handful of popcorn, peeking over at the other two guys again. For a beat he considers cuddling up to Liam, but then decides he doesn't want to force himself upon him, which is kind of ridiculous, since they're in a relationship. For the first time, Scott understands Stiles' argument when he had said Scott and Liam had moved fast. Add to that that Scott also doesn't know if Liam is comfortable with public displays of affection and Stiles' words become even truer. So for now, Scott is left with requiring an excuse to initiate physical contact with his boyfriend and, so far, nothing interesting in the movie has happened yet.
To make matters worse, Scott realizes he isn't really scared of horror films either. Usually he just finds them funny. Then again, that problem can easily be solved by just pretending that he is scared. And of course there's always the possibility that Liam turns out to be terrified of them. Great, now Scott's hoping that he is. Boyfriend of the year.
Anyway, the movie.
They're forty-five minutes in when all the sound from the screen fades out, indicating that something is about to happen. Scott holds his breath, popcorn in front of his mouth. Mesmerized by the images on the screen, he shivers when he feels something tickle against his finger. He doesn't have to look down to know it is Liam's pinky finger trying to find his. Half-consciously, he entangles them, smiling slightly. In the background, he vaguely registers the sound of a soft kiss, coming from beside him.
The killer turns up from behind the main character, the sound effect blasting from the speakers and Liam jumps—literally jumps, causing Scott to snicker and putting a hand onto his back soothingly. Liam looks back at him, chuckling shyly. Scott licks his lips in response, deciding to be bold and sticks out his arms invitingly. His boyfriend smiles, moving into his touch. Liam's frame fits perfectly against Scott's side, especially when the taller one snakes an arm around Liam's shoulders. The boy settles in the crook of his neck, just like he had done earlier; cheek pressed against Scott's collar bone.
They both simultaneously exhale a deep breath, and Scott isn't sure if it's from the earlier tension from the movie or from the loaded air between them where they, maybe, both had been waiting for the other to come closer. Nonetheless, Scott squeezes Liam a little tighter to his body and the boy moves to put his hand on Scott's stomach. A bit tentative at first, but when Scott doesn't move away from his touch, Liam palms his shirt. As extra encouragement, Scott put his own free hand over Liam's, subtly letting him know it's okay.
A couple of minutes later they are both coated in a very comfortable warmth; a softness that makes them incredibly lazy. The perfect circumstances for mindlessly watching a movie. A distant thought travels through Scott's mind, thinking it's probably good for Liam that he has some distraction after what had happened earlier.
He is pulled out of focus when the sound of wet kisses infiltrate his ears. Only moving his eyes, he glances from the corners, over at Mason and Brett, who have pulled a blanket over their bodies. Scott watches their brief make-out session, his stomach churning a little. Unsure if it's from jealousy or disgust, he tries to revert his attention back to the movie.
Naturally, he can't, because now his senses have focused in on what's going on beside him rather than in front of him. He moves his hips a little and luckily Liam doesn't move away from him. He sighs quietly, looking down at the top of Liam's head. After a moment of debate, he presses a kiss into his hair. In response, Liam rubs his thumb over Scott's stomach, ruffling the fabric of his shirt. It is then that Scott realizes this is the first time they have been intimate—casually intimate—and he notices that Liam isn't as tense as he has been the times before, when Scott had hovered over him while they laid on Liam's bed. Something in his lower body stirs and he wiggles his toes.
The credits roll onto the screen an hour later, and for a moment neither of the boys make any attempt in moving. In the end, Liam does, getting up to turn on the lights. Everyone rubs their eyes, groaning a little.
"That was a really good movie," Mason comments mid-yawn.
Liam nods, crawling back onto the bed.
"It was," Scott acknowledges, even though he doesn't really agree. It wasn't scary at all.
"Anyway…" Mason says, getting up. "I think we should probably go." He looks over at Brett, who has an intense look on his face as he nods.
Mason turns back to Liam and Scott pretends he doesn't see Brett rearranging himself…there.
"I'll walk down with you," Liam offers.
Mason nods. "Scott, nice to see you," he says, giving him a quick hug.
"Yeah, nice to meet you, man," Brett says after the two have ended their short embrace, extending a hand. Scott shakes it briefly, trying to be more casual than formal.
"Have a good one."
Scott rolls his eyes at himself when they have turned the corner.
After a sigh, he flops backwards onto the bed. Absentmindedly, his fingers start playing with his hair as he doesn't really think about anything in particular—too woozy from the movie and the comfortable position he has been in, in the past hour.
Liam comes back into the room a while later. "Man, those two are really into each other," he says.
Scott snickers, watching his boyfriend lie down next to him. "Yeah, they must be really in love."
"Well, I'm in love with you, but that doesn't mean I have to kiss you every five minutes."
Scott scoots down a little, so that he's on the same level as Liam. He rolls onto his side and Liam does the same. "I wouldn't mind if you did, though," Scott replies in a bit more slow voice, staring into Liam's eyes. "Just so you know…"
Liam snorts, pursing his lips together. He doesn't reply to Scott's comment, so they end up just staring at each other for a while. Scott watches the waves rock back and forth and after a couple of minutes wraps his arms around Liam. The boy raises his head so Scott can sneak his arm under his neck. He kisses Liam's forehead while scooting a little closer, until he can feel the boy's breath on his chin. Scott looks down at him, glancing at his soft looking lips a couple of times.
But then Liam's chest twitches and suddenly Scott can hear that familiar constricted tone in Liam's breathing. Three times is a charm, so he finally decides to comment on it.
"You're nervous," he voices his observation softly.
Liam continues to stare up at him, shrugging ever so slightly.
"You don't have to be."
His boyfriend averts his gaze for a second. "Well…I have to be a little…" His voice is barely a whisper. "I mean…we're boyfriends…and…" He swallows. "…Really close, at the moment."
Scott's lips show a hint of a gentle smile. "Nothing has to happen if you don't want to, you know."
Liam's eyes narrow a little. The tip of his tongue pokes out as he wets his lips. "Is that okay?"
Air leaves Scott's lungs through his nose. His smile widens, showing teeth, and he nods confidently. "Of course it is. If you're not ready, you're not ready."
Liam mimics his expression and snuggles a bit closer to Scott's chest. "Thanks," he says. "And, to be honest, I don't really know if I'm ready. I mean, I sort of want to…"
Scott's fingers card through Liam's hair. "It's okay," he says. "'Sort of' isn't enough, anyway."
Liam kisses his neck.