Author's Note: So I wrote another Penelope/Reid story, called Curious. It's after the episode JJ, so... fun. Oh, and...I got nominated for...some award thing for my other Penelope/Reid oneshot 'To the Cave', I can't think of what the thing is called at the moment and I'm too lazy to go check, but the voting and stuff for it doesn't start until the 22 and I'm sure I'll update again before then, so I'll mention it again. It's cool, I like being nominated, it's neat. haha. Okay. On with the story!
"Happy After-Hump Day!" Garcia said, patting Spencer on the back. He coughed on his drink before turning to her.
"What?" He said after composing himself.
"After-Hump Day. It's Thursday, so it's after...Because Wednesday is...never mind." Garcia looked in his cup, "Is that coffee?"
Spencer pulled back his cup and frowned. "No."
"Spencer Thomas Reid, I am telling on you."
"It's decaf!" Spencer cried out, holding his cup close. "I need it."
Penelope shook her head. "We should call your sponser and tell him about this new addiction."
Spencer looked at her, solemnly and Penelope flushed a little. She had been joking, forgetting about the fact that he actually did have a sponser.
"I...Sorry, Reid. I didn't mean like-"
He shook his head, wrapping his fingers around his cup, staring at the dark liquid. "No, no... you're right." He muttered before setting down the coffee. Garcia watched as he walked away before swearing to herself. No one talked about his addiction unless he brought it up and that was rare. She sighed and followed the man.
"Reid." She called out, grabbing his arm. He turned to look at her.
"I was just kidding."
"But you were right. I shouldn't be so...It's bad that I'm like that."
"It's coffee, it's just.. it's you. You've always loved your coffee. I was just kidding. You're not addicted...Well, you are addicted to coffee, but it's not..." She sighed. She wasn't doing any better. "I'd rather you be addicted to coffee than Dilaudid."
"Does it make me a bad person if I've been thinking about it again?"
Garcia leaned against the closest desk. "You've been thinking about doing drugs again?"
"No. I wouldn't do that. Not with Henry and now, Dylan... I've just been thinking about what it felt like. How...easy it was to just sit there and be in it and...not think about anything."
"But is that worth losing everything?" Garcia said, slowly, unsure what he was saying.
Spencer sat on the desk next to her. "No. I just, with everything going on, it'd be nice to close my eyes and not be bombarded with all the questions I have and all the information, and the feelings, and the fear."
Garcia nodded and reached out. "Maybe we should go to a meeting tonight, Spencer."
"You have to work, you have a case. I'll be fine, Penelope. I'm fine."
"Kevin can handle the fort for an hour or so." She squeezed his hand. "We're going to a meeting tonight. Our little secret."
Criminal Minds || What Happens
Ryan stood when she saw the poeople flooding out of the doors Spencer and Henry was supposed to be coming out of. She had barely talked to the man since their conversation; the case had been a long and tiring one taking up most of her time for the week. She grinned largely when she saw the little boy first, with a bright red backpack on, bouncing. Someone had caffeine. She frowned at the jealous feeling that came over her. God, she really wanted a cup of coffee. She waved and Henry saw and ran over to her, causing Spencer to freak a little before he saw her. She saw him relax and walk towards the two.
"Ms. Ryan! Hi!" Henry said before hugging her tight. Ryan smiled and squeezed him back.
"Hey Mini."
"I came! Mommy didn't want me to come because she working a lot and she had the weekend off, but I told her I promised and Daddy said you can't break a promise and she said okay, but she was sad, so I tell her that I make sure I call her a lot. A lot a lot, not just once, but like FIVE times a day."
"Five times, huh?"
Henry nodded and showed her five fingers. "Five times!"
Ryan grinned before looking up at Spencer. She set the boy down before wrapping her arms around the man. "I missed you."
Spencer wrapped his arms around her, burying his face into her neck, holding her tighter than she ever think she'd felt him hold her. He didn't say anything and Ryan knew something was wrong. When he pulled back, she locked eyes with him. He smiled at her, but it didn't reach his eyes, before kissing her. "Missed you too."
She smiled at him, reminding herself to ask him about it later. She looked back at the little boy. "How about some pizza?"
Henry's eyes got wide. "Yeah!"
Criminal Minds || What Happens
Spencer smiled as he saw Ryan come outside. She looked at him, curiously.
"What are you doing out here, Spence?"
"I could use some fresh air."
Ryan nodded and sat next to him, before peering into his cup. "Red Wine?"
"You had a bottle and I... It's been a long week."
Ryan nodded, resting her head on his shoulder and a hand on his thigh.
"Do you want to talk about it?"
"No, not really." He said, looking at his cup.
"I didn't upset you with our conversation, did I?"
"No. I'm fine. Just a long week."
"Then why won't you look at me? Tell me what's wrong."
He shifted his eyes to her and she wanted to smack him. "I'm fine, Ryan."
She reached out and grabbed his chin, causing him to face her. "Don't lie to me. I know when you're not okay."
He sighed, looking into her eyes. "I just.. I'm scared. Our conversation and then, everything else."
Ryan let go of his face and grabbed his hand. "Like what?"
"I started to think about everything else that scares me about this, and... everything does. Not just about you and the baby, but about JJ and Henry. He's so smart, Ryan. He's so smart and he's going to start school in a couple years and what if everyone thinks he's different and doesn't want to be his friend?"
Ryan frowned and squeezed his hand. "He made friends in that daycare place he was in while he was here, remember?"
"Yeah, but school is different. He's going to have all the right answers and the teachers are going to love him and...he's going to be so smart, he can already count to five, Ryan. They're going to move him up and he's going to be around older people and he won't be able to connect and-"
"Spencer. He has us and JJ and everyone and I'm sure she'll make sure he'll have friends. He'll be in sports or something where he can be around kids his age and have fun."
"But we can't stop people from picking on him. He could be in high school as a preteen and people are so mean, Ryan. They're so mean."
Her heart was breaking as she watched Spencer shake his head, remembering all the bad things that happened to him. She scooted closer to him and touched his face. "We can't think that far ahead yet, Spence. He's a happy little boy right now, who loves his mom and his dad and his uncles and aunts. We'll deal with that when we get to it."
"But what if he's schizo-"
Ryan pressed her fingers to his lips, causing him to stop. "We'll deal wth that if we get there. Right now, he's a happy social little boy. Just be glad for that."
"You could leave."
"I'm not going to leave, Spence. We talked about this already, remember?"
"But you don't know how-"
"I don't care how hard it is. He's a part of you. He's your son and I love you and I love Henry."
"But-"
"Shh." She hushed him, running her hand up to comb her fingers through his hair. "You don't have to be afraid of that, Spence. I'm not leaving him. I'm not leaving you." She leaned in and kissed his forehead.
"I don't believe you."
Ryan watched as he got up and walked inside before following him, a little angry.
"And why the hell not?"
"Because you don't know what it's like, Ryan! One day, he's not going to be a cute little boy. He's going to be 6'1 and strong and if he's sick, he's going to have moments where he's mean and it's scary!"
"I can handle myself. I'm strong, too, Spencer."
He turned to face her before walking up to her, too close and yet she didn't back up. She looked up at him, seeing the hurt and fear and the anger in his eyes.
"Will you be strong when you walk into our home one day after a case or something and he's there and he attacks you? Because he doesn't remember who you are? Or because he found your files, saw that you were from the FBI and thought you were someone who was going to take him in, who was going to hurt him. Are you going to be able to fight with the cute 'little boy' as he holds you by the throat, demanding who you are and what you want with him?"al
Ryan kept her eyes locked with his, seeing how they become wet and the angry and everything faded into pure heartache. She didn't reach out and touch him.
"Did your mom do that to you, Spencer?" She asked, softly.
Realization came into his eyes and he backed up before turning away to grab the bottle. Ryan followed him and ran her hand over his arm, taking the bottle away from him.
"Spence."
He turned back to her as she set it back down and placed her hands on his cheeks. "Whether it's Henry or Dylan or both, neither. If they get sick, I am going to be here and we'll work through this. We'll take them to the specialists and we'll get them the help they need and...it's going to be scary and hard and a lot of heartache, but we don't have to be your parents. We don't have to be like you have JJ and you have me and you have everyone and so will Henry and Dylan and we'll all be there. You don't have to be alone anymore, okay? You're not alone."
Spencer sighed and leaned his forehead against hers. She watched as he struggled with his emotions. She rubbed the back of his neck, running her fingers through his hair as he rested his head on her shoulder, his arms wrapped around her. After a few moments, he pulled back and kissed her. Ryan pulled back and looked at him, his eyes full of unshed tears.
"I love you, Spencer Reid."
"I love you. Can we go to bed now?" He said, leaning into her touch. He looked exhausted and she knew that his worries had been weighing on him for a while, and if he could sleep, then they would sleep. She nodded, carressing his cheek before grabbing his hands and pulling him towards the room.
Author's Note (Part Deux): So this scene was supposed to be meant for JJ and Reid, but... when I wrote it for them, it came out as angry and... I don't know why, but it didn't work. I think it's good for R2 because it sort of brings them a little closer, which I think they might need. Plus, Spencer learning he can lean on someone other than JJ...is nice. I think. Hmm. But I got to go to work now.