Beck's POV
"she seemed like a nice girl" My Mom says, as I hop in the front seat "although she didn't talk much..."
"She was just nervous about coming home" she turns down the volume of the radio, that's a the same, terrible station that only plays the worst ballads.
"She should be, I've heard her parents are getting a divorce"
"what?! Where did you hear that?!" that's pretty much impossible, Tor always told me about the every weekend getaways and dinner nights alone. They have a lot of problems, but I don't think they have them with each other.
"My friend, Jolene, works with her father and told me he walked in on her with another men" I get my phone, and text her asking if everything's alright, I can't believe this.
"Mom you have to drive me ba..."
"No, no way, she needs to talk to her parents alone, and you have to talk to your Dad" I roll my eyes at the mention of the guy, I know he's my Dad, and I still love him, but I can't be in the same room with him, not yet. Tori was basically dead, and he didn't want me to go see her, just thinking about it makes me want to yell. What did he have in mind?
"Mom I.."
"I know you're mad, I had a long conversation with him about everything that happened and I think you two should talk" I turn off the radio station, and she looks pissed, turning it back on "don't be stubborn, I know you hated him for not wanting you to see Tori, but..."
"She was basically dead Mom, and he wouldn't let me see her" I turn off the radio again, and I guess she just gets tired of trying, and settles down my the silence. "I know his my father, but..."
"No, you're right, he's your father and he just wants what's best for you, so you're gonna come home and listen, final word" She parks at the driveway, and I attempt to go straight to my RV but she grabs my arm pulling me inside the house. Damn, I'm really not up to a fight today.
"We're hoome!" She yells, and my Dad turns off the TV, right in the middle of a hockey game...fuck, he's mad.
"Hello honey" He gives my Mom a kiss, and she goes straight to the kitchen, leaving the both of us alone. "So, I was watching the game, and it crossed my mind" I roll my eyes for the hundredth time today, and sit down at the chair a chair all the way across the living room, waiting for him to start yelling. I don't know why he does it, yelling doesn't really get to me, it only makes me madder. If he could just sit down and talk like a rational person... "How the hell do you go off to freaking Tennessee without my permission?!"
I sight, and put my backpack down as he starts to get red "Mom let me go"
"Real nice big boy, you know your Mother is a romantic!" He breathes in, and brings his hands up to his forehead "I know I said that rule...roof...thing but you're still underage! And I'm still your father!" He goes on and on, and I stop listening after he starts talking about responsibility and all that, so I'm just sitting here, smelling the great food my Mom's making for lunch. "Are you even listening to me?!"
"Will you stop yelling? Really, I can't listen if you're yelling"
"Stop with the attitude!" There he goes, screaming again.
"You're yelling again!"
He sits down in the couch nearest to me, and I'm glad to see he's clearly trying to calm himself down "I know you were upset that I didn't want you to go back..."
"If Mom tried to kill herself and Grandma told you not to see her, would you listen?"
"Don't compare a twenty year marriage with this girl you've been seeing for a month" I sit back and look straight at the ground, I suppose it's not the same, but that's not nearly a good explanation. "Beck, you have to understand, Tori is not your responsibility. I know you love her, and it's fine, but you can't drop everything to go be with her"
"I didn't left Grandma's to hang out! I left because she cut her wrists Dad! Looked in the mirror and decided living wasn't worth it! It wasn't like she called so we could go to the movies!" I run my fingers through my hair, and lower my voice, I didn't tell him to stop screaming for to start "Do you think it's fun for me? To see her self destroying every single day? It's not, but I can't help it, you said it yourself I love her"
"I know I just...I worry about you son, you shouldn't have to deal with these things" He gets up, and I do the same, picking up my backpack "Just talk to me alright, don't let it get to your head"
"I won't" He pulls me in to a hug, and there's really nothing else to say, I think we agreed to disagree on what's best for me.
Tori's POV
"Tori, you're home!" My Mom is holding a new lamb, white and pink with mirrors on the bottom. Is she...yeah, I'm pretty sure she has extensions on her hair and...is she wearing the dress I wore for Trina's Birthweek last year? "What do you think about my new look?"
"You look like...me?" A thirty year older version of me, but still, weird.
"Oh that's what I was going for!" she runs in my direction, and takes out the newest Pearphone JX, quickly snapping a picture of together before I can even react "Now, when Trina goes away you'll still have a sister at home! I know how you two were close"
"we were?" She laughs, way too much for my completely real question, where on earth was I close to Trina? Mom's actually freaking me out a little bit right now "Where are all of Dad's stuff?"
"oh...that..." she nods her head, and opens a freakishly wide smile "Oh, look at the time! You have a shrink's appointment today, c'mon I'll drive you"
"What?! Since when?" I don't want to go to this stupid appointment, why does she even care?
"Since I had a talk with Lane about, you know" she points at my wrists, and I cross my arms hiding them, it's ridiculous how she can't even say it. And why did she talk to Lane about it?! "and he and doctor Morey agreed it'd be best if Doctor Fowler cleared you first and..."
"Fine, let's get it over with" I walk straight out the door and into her car, it's best that I go soon, arrive on time and be as normal as I can, so I can get cleared out and go back to the main distraction of problems in my life, school. I love it, and this Doctor Fowler person can't that it away from me. She drives off. "Where were all of Dad's stuff?" I ask again, and again, that freakishly weird smile.
"Well, your father and I...we're getting a divorce" WHAT? "You see, sweetheart he walked in on me with...Gary..."
"You've got to be kidding" Perfect, just what I needed "If you're the one who cheated, why is he the one moving out?!"
"I bought the house, I'm staying, and so are you Trina, a daughter can't simply live without her mother" Right, I bet I'd be doing so much better if she hadn't been always so self centered...it's like she's an older version of Trina.
"Fuck Mom, why did you have to do this now?"
She stops the car, and looks at me with confused eyes, and a weird frown "We're here, just look for number sixty eight" she says, and I get out without another word. Fuck! Fuck! Fuck! It's not enough to have a suicidal daughter now we're also the family with divorced parents... I can't stand it, why didn't she cheat on Dad another time? Or just DIDN'T CHEAT. "Oh, you're Dad is picking you up!" she yells, great, at least he'll tell me where he's living, and maybe I'll move in with him instead of being stuck with my Mom.
I walk in the woman's office, and she tries to greet me but I run for her encounter, going straight to her office and spotting a couch. I lie down on it, throwing my purse on the floor "Ok, I'm ready, fix me, please" Just like that, I burst into tears, it's the first time I do it in front of anyone besides Beck, and I can't seem to be able to stop. It's too much, I need a break, things go wrong and they keep going wrong and it's one bomb after another! How could they do this? How could my Mom cheat on my Dad?! Worse, how could she do it and get caught?! I need a stable family life, I can't have them fighting all the time and the best parent being the one to move out! At least my Dad tells me he loves me sometimes, and is not trying to act LIKE HE'S MY FUCKING SISTER! My god, why is everything going wrong again? Is it LA? It has to be La, because things were just find back in Tennessee.
I sit up and cover my face, trying to control myself but I can't, I can't do it unless I cut. "Here you go" I look up, and she hands me a glass of water, I grab it and take a sip, before the hiccups start and I put the glass down on the table at the corner. Great way to introduce yourself Tori, the woman will never let you go back to school now. I cross my legs and stay silent, looking at her for the first time since I got here. She's tall, blonde and really pretty. The perfect figure for a model, only a bit older, must be in her late thirties which I like, I'd hate for her to be too old, old people don't get how hard it is to grow up in my generation.
"Sorry" I breathe out, wiping my eyes, and she keeps silent "It's just...everything is happening and...I need to go back to school..."
"Why did you come here today?" Her office is weirdly matches her looks, it's clean, what you'd imagine someone in. With white couches and peach beige walls, with paintings all over them and a vase with fresh flowers. I feel like a black hole of energy in here.
"What do you mean?" I tuck my hair behind my ears and look dead straight at her. "Look, you have to clear me out for school, I..."
"I most likely will clear you, don't worry" She crosses her legs and picks up a cardboard from the table next to her, so cliché, the shrink with her cardboard and apparently perfect office. "Let's just talk, ok? How's your school?"
She doesn't smile too much thought, like Doctor Morey, I already like her better "I love my school, I go to Hollywood Arts and it's pretty amazing"
"Hollywood Arts? Amazing school, what's your talent?"
"I do a little bit of everything, but what I like the most is singing" Ok, I stopped crying I'm talking without breaking my voice, if I keep this up for the rest of the session she might let me go back.
"And do you do write your own songs?"
"My friend usually writes them, but Beck and...My boyfriend and I wrote one for a project and I'm pretty sure we're gonna get an A"
"Beck, is that your boyfriend?" I nod, and take another sip of water "How long you two have been dating?"
"A month or so" I don't really know, I don't remember the exact date and it doesn't really matter because that's only time. "Our teacher had us do a song together, it's weird ever since I got in to school this teacher had him and I doing scenes together and plays and all that, and it took us three years to actually talk to each other"
Sikowitz, I bet he always knew what he was getting us into "How is yours and Beck's relat..."
"Stop" I cut her off, she's not even worth asking that question I am not ready to talk about it, I already came in crying I don't want to go out the same way "I can't talk about him, not yet, I don't know you well enough. And he's not the source of the problem ok? I know this small talk thing you're doing is a way to make me talk about the real problem, and he's not it." He might be part of the problem now, and it's not even him per say, it's college, and again, I'm not going to think about that right now.
"What happened today?" she puts the cardboard down, and pours herself some water. I prefer it that way, when we're just talking. "You came in crying, what happened?"
"Everything happened" I look down at the floor, she cut right to chase, that's what I wanted "After I...did, hum, I..." I can't say out loud either, unless I'm panicking I can't say it, this is so pathetic. I roll up my sleeves and show her my wrists, she doesn't seem to be surprised. The cardboard, obviously, she must have my chart "My friends and I we traveled for Winter Break, we just go back today and I get home and...My Mom was dressed in my clothes, saying something about being my sister and in the car she told me my Dad and her a getting a divorce"
"Which bothered you the most? The divorce of the fact that she was dressed like you?"
'The fact that I'm going to have to live with her and be with my sister when she's back from college' I think, but I don't say it out loud. I am not this person, and I don't even know Doctor Fowler's first name! How can I tell her everything about my life, if I don't know if she's a Jenna or Julia?! I scratch my hand, and I keep scratching it in a way that she can't notice. I can feel the tears again, but I don't want to cry, I've had enough of it "I just need you to teach me how to stop"
"Stop what?" I shut my eyes, and there they go, stupid tears rolling down my stupid face.
"This!" I point at my puffy eyes, with my scared wrists "Why can't I take things like normal people?!"
"Everyone has their own way of coping, some are more self destructive than others but I'm going to help you change alright?"
"What's your name?" She opens a small smile, as if I had taken this huge step only I don't know what it is, I just want to get basic information on her.
Turns out, she knew what I was trying to do. I guess it's what ever client must do, but I'm glad I got what I wanted from it, Her name is Anna, she's thirty three and grew up in Arizona. I guess she can make a lot more money being a therapist in California, with all the drug abuse, marriage counseling and depressed teenagers.
"Do you know what my Mom said, at the hospital?" I cross my legs and look at the window, that whole day is a blur, but if there's one thing I'll never forget is that one liner before she head out to a Christmas party "Stay Safe. Not one single I love You, or a hug, just stay safe" I get up and start to pace around the room, it's not like there's much time left of this session "She talks to me, like nothing happened! Ignoring the big elephant on the room!"
"Try to talk to her, just sit down and make her listen to you" She gets up too, and hands me a not "Just hand this to your school counselor, and you'll be clear to attend school"
"Thank you" she leads me to the waiting room I run across when I first came in, and opens the door pushing the elevator button.
"I'm expecting to see you at Thursday, same hour?" I nod, and get in the elevator with a weird feeling. I've never confronted my Mom, she's right about that, I've always thought it'd be kind of pointless, picking up a fight for nothing... I probably won't do anything about it, but if my doctors think talking to Anna is going to make me stop having breakdowns over a broken nail, I will.
I get out the building, and spot my Dad waiting for me, he's dressed the same way he did before...that's a good sign. "Hey Dad"
"Tori, it's good to see you" he drives off, the backseat of the car is a mess all of his stuff are in there, and it smells like old junk food in here "And Holly told me you know" God, he's calling Mom Holly, that's so weird, it was always babe, or honey, never Holly.
"I did, I just don't get why she's getting the house"
"She bought it, with the money your Grandfather left her, I have no legal rights over it"
"Where are you going to live?" He parks at our driveway, and I stay in the car waiting for an answer.
"I don't make a lot of money, and LA is a really expensive city" He puts his hand on my shoulder and sights "The condo in Chattanooga, I bought it, and we already settled it's mine with the divorce lawyer, I'm going to get better salary, the condo will be..."
"wait, you're moving to Tennessee?"
"I'm sorry sweetie"
Oh give me fucking a break...
A/N: Hey guys! First of all, I hope you liked this chapter, not much happened but it was important to put it out there that the Vegas are getting a divorce, and Beck's chat with his Dad. I loved the outcome of reviews on the last chapter, I hope nothing changes. Secondly, I uploaded a new One-Shot called 'How It Should Have Happened' I'd love it for you guys to take a look!
Please review! Love you all,
- Kiribati