"..." Normal chat
ABC Thought
Chapter 21
"I'm home." I announce my return, making my way through the living room and Shinobu greets me. "Welcome back, Shiomi-sama. How was your trip if I may ask?"
"It was good. Thanks for asking, Shinobu-san" I nod to him in appreciation and hear my mom's call out of the living room. "Shiomi?"
"Yes mom, I'm here." I walk in there and take a seat next to her. As she pours a cup of tea for me. "Welcome home, dear. You're a bit late. Tatsuya was here a while ago"
"Tatsuya-kun?"
"Yes, He came to ask about your health's condition. Even bringing you fruits and other stuff right here." My mom points at a nicely fruit basket sitting neatly at the corner of the table.
I gasp in awed at how fancy it looks, "Wow a whole basket?"
"That boy seems to cares a lot about you." She beams, recalling how Tatsuya has comes over to visit her daughter from time to time without the girl knowing.
"Yeah, Tatsuya-kun is indeed a good friend." I pull the basket to my side to have a better check. Oranges, apples, more fruits and some vitamins, books, a lucky charm(?) "I'm going to thanks him tomorrow when -" My speech is interrupted by a long yawn.
"Go get some rest first. I will have the maid prepare some food and bring it to your room, alright?" Mom pats my shoulder and I nod. Quickly drink up the tea and get to my room."Okay. Thanks mom."
At Shiomi's room
Once done taking a warm bath, I jump onto my comfy bed and hug the pillow lying nearby. Sighing in relief as those negative feelings have completely washed away along with the water. This is definitely a sight of exhaustion, nothing more. Perhaps I should give myself a break more often.
Simply a good sleep and I should be back to my normal self again. Yes, that has got to be it.
And I've never been so wrong, however…
3 days later (Friday)
At the school yard (After school)
"…Shiomi-chan… Shiomi-chan!" While walking to the school's gate, I hear Hana's voice calling from behind and a hand on my shoulder.
"Ah, Hana-chan. Hello." I greet her and she pouts. "What do you mean hello! We've already met this morning!"
"You've been spacing out a lot lately. What's wrong with you? Are you still tired?"
"You worried too much. I'm totally fine."
Just then Kasumi approaches and asks. "Did something happen with your love life?"
"L-Love?!" Her question causes me to choke on my breath.
Huh? Did I guess it right? Seeing her friend's strong reaction, Kasumi raises her eyebrow suspiciously. "Did you have a fight with Tatsuya?"
"What are you talking about? There's nothing between me and Tatsuya." I deny the ridiculous idea.
"Eh? Then what?" Hana grabs my arm to prevent me from running away. While Kasumi continue with her inquiry. "Shiomi-chan, don't tell me that you actually have someone else?"
"S-someone else?!" I lose my cool at the word coming from her lips and begin fluttering here and there. "N-No way! I'm not having anyone!"
Only waiting for that, Kasumi smirks and drags me away. "Hah! That reaction of yours obviously means you do! Come on, you gotta tell us everything! I'm not letting you get away this time!"
Despite my hopeless struggle within her grip to get out. "No, that's not it!"
Meanwhile...
Sesshomaru is standing the middle of the group's resting spot. He has been staring at the sky above for a while now, as if waiting for someone's arrival.
Sitting from afar, Jaken watches his lord's confusing action in deep thinking. How odd, Sesshomaru-sama seems to be restless lately. I wonder what could be the cause?
Since Nanase's always by Sesshomaru's side, she has also recognized a stir hidden behind his strange behavior and Nanase instinct's warning her that this is not a good sign. Especially to her relationship.
"Aw, I wonder what keeps Onee-chan so long." Rin pouts in boredom, picking up a wild flower on the ground to play with. It's been three days and yet they haven't moved away from their spot, even for an inch.
Onee-chan? She must be talking about that human girl. Nanase's ears straightened up once hearing the girl mentions about Shiomi. Now that reminds me…Didn't Sesshomaru act like this not too long after she left? The woman bites her lips, getting irritated for every unanswered thought. She cannot be the reason, can she? Is there something else between them that I don't know of?
"Pssh...Rin, at that time. Didn't you say she's upset?" Jaken asks the girl, trying to soften his voice as much as possible so Sesshomaru wouldn't hear and Rin nods. "Well, yeah… I think so"
"Do you know why?"
"Uhm… I'm not sure…"
After spending a long moment trying to solve the mysterious puzzle, Jaken blurts out his thought subconsciously. "This time she definitely takes longer than the usual…Hmm…He can't be missing her, can he?"
And he instantly earn himself fatal kick from Sesshomaru to the face. "Bwegh!"
"Jaken-sama, are you alright?" Rin squats down next to him to ask. Watching Jaken's lying on the ground with his face down.
Notice the silver haired lord is about to fly away, Nanase approaches him. "Sesshomaru-sama, where are you going?"
"Sesshomaru-sama!" However the guy ignores her call and keeps on moving, disappears out of her sight soon after. Not going to lose her target so easily, Nanase decides to follow him. Is he going to that human girl's place? Hmph! I have to find out!
"Ah, Nanase onee-san." Rin stands up once she sees the female Inu Youkai dashes off into the thick forest. "Now she's gone too…"
At the Bone-Eaters well
After following Sesshomaru for quite a long way, Nanase reaches to an old-looking well and there. She sees the man drops right into it. Confused, She walks over to the well's entrance to have a look. There is no one down there but an empty ground. "Where did he go?!"
Curious about this strange phenomenon, Nanase jumps in to confirm it herself and observes the bottom closely. Just dirt, some shattered bones, long vines and stiff wall. "I don't get it. This is just a normal empty well"
Then she gets out of the well and sees that the surroundings are still the same. Nothing changes before and after she goes through the thing. "What's going on? His scent ends right here but he's not here. How can Sesshomaru just vanish into thin air like that?!"
Back to Shiomi
At the Ice cream shop
"Come on, spill it out already. You're dating someone, aren't you." With a mouthful of ice cream, Kasumi points her spoon at my face, questioning me.
"Kasumi-chan, I told you many times already. I'm not dating anyone at the moment, really!" I let out a long sigh, trying to explain to her that she's just overreacting things yet Kasumi still refuse to listen
"But you have to have another guy friend, right?" Hana frowns suspiciously and I weakly nod "Uhm, yeah...?"
And only waiting to hear that, Kasumi slams her hands onto the table that startles me and the other guests inside the store. "I knew it! You've been hiding from us all this time!"
Her voice is so loud that I have to gesture her to calm down, getting embarrassed as everyone is now looking at us. "Shhh...! And no, I'm not. I was trying to find a good chance to tell you guys about him actually!"
"Do you meet that guy often?"
"Well, yes."
"Does he have a girlfriend?"
"No, I don't think so."
So she does seeing someone. Hana and Kasumi look at each other, sharing the same thought in mind.
"Tell me more about this guy." Hana requests some info about this mysterious man and I start to describe about him. "Uhm… He's kind of cold and mean when first meet. He doesn't talk much and always showing a calm face mostly in any situation. But at the same time he's also caring and nice…"
"Eh? This guy doesn't sound so bad. Then why did you two fight?" Hana tilts her head, somewhat have pictured the man inside her mind. Seems average and a little weird, though she doesn't think that this kind of guy would suit her friend liking.
"We're not fighting. It's just that…" Fighting, huh? I don't think that's it. Because clearly none of us has done something wrong. More like it's only me who is being crazy here...
"It's just what?" Kasumi raise her eyebrow and I start recalling to what happened back then. "Just some days ago, I felt annoyed when I saw him sitting together with another girl - Eh?"
Why Nanase and not someone else? Why now? Hasn't all of this happened soon after she announced to be Sesshomaru's mate? These uneasy feelings, the pain inside my chest, everything... Was all because I envy Nanase?
Was that why I feel irritated whenever seeing Nanase and Sesshomaru together? Why I felt so oddly lonely and so out of place?
If it is indeed jealousy that I am suffering from right now then...
Does that mean I'm in love with Sesshomaru?!
I stare at the ice cream cup in my hands, face turns bright red by the thought in my head. Me? Love Sesshomaru?!
Hana waves her hand near Shiomi's face to wake the girl up from her daydreams and she suddenly yells, almost causing the girl to falls off their chairs. "I'm not jealous of her!"
It's not until then I finally snap back to reality and seeing both of my friends are dumbfounded. "I-I mean I'm fine, thanks Hana-chan"
Resting her chin on one hand, Kasumi comments. "Hmm...You and him aren't dating yet you're jealous? Is it one-sided?"
"So, when are you going to confess?" Hana leans closer to ask and I blush even more.
Confess my feeling? I don't think I'm even ready for that yet. No. More like there is no longer any chance left for me, a human, to do so. Not to mention that I do not have a slightest clue of how he feels about me...It's just hopeless the more I think about our relationship.
"I won't." I shake my head in response and instantly earn a strange look from Kasumi. "Huh? Why not? Are you going to wait for him instead?"
"Not that either. What I mean is it's not going to work out between us."
Trying to get me out of negative thinking, Hana suggests. "How do you know? You gotta try to find out, Shiomi-chan"
"No, there's no need to. I just know…" I smile wryly.
After all, it's still better for both Sesshomaru and me this way. Just staying as friends as we are now is already good enough.
At night
Shiomi's room
"Hm…This should do." I write nonstop, trying to answer the Physics questions on my notebook then out of the blue, Hana's words pop up inside my mind. "You have to try to find out"
I let out a long sigh and drop my pencil, again. Impossible, despite possess abnormal abilities, I may still a human being. There's no way I can compete to Nanase, who is a full-blooded Inu youkai…
And species is not the only thing I'm worrying about. But our status, lifestyles, the era we're living in,... I lose to Nanase almost about everything.
*Flash back*
"Sesshomaru-sama will never accept an annoying woman like you! Give up and go home already!" Jaken yelled, trying to shoo Nanase back home after a thousand times already.
Though every time she just laughed at it and refused to leave. "Now, now my dear grumpy little Imp. Instead of throwing your tantrum around like that. I dare say it would be wiser for you to behave and approve our relationship."
Hearing such a ridiculous idea, Jaken raised his eyebrow at her. "Why would that be wiser for me?"
"You still don't get it, do you? With my powerful support, Sesshomaru shall defeat that Lord of the South and conquer the Southern lands in the near future…Imagine all fame, power and wealth he will gain." Nanase explained.
"You… I…"
"In fact, you all better be grateful that your lord has found me. As it is only I who shall be his perfect mate, no one else."
Actually, it was Rin who found you in the first place. But I doubt that would be important anymore...
"Does that mean Nanase onee-san is going to become Sesshomaru-sama's wife?" Rin's sudden question somehow caused my heart to skip a beat. Wife...?
Nanase shifted her head to us, smirking. "If that's what called in human term. Then yes. I'm going to become Sesshomaru's wife and together, we will bear even stronger generation of the Inu youkai."
"Whether you like it or not. Servants." Her sharp golden eyes swiftly moved from Rin to Jaken and stopped once she met mine, as if referring those words mostly to me...
*End flashback*
Dammit! How many times do I have to keep reminding you that I'm not your servant?!
"This is crazy! I can't concentrate at all!" Figure that sitting in one place and sulking won't get me anywhere. I decide to free my mind by taking a walk in my garden.
However before I can get to the door, a gust of wind pushes the windows wide open and Sesshomaru gently lands into the middle of my room. "Sesshomaru?! What are you doing here?"
Ignores my question, he takes a quick scan of my room and asks me in return. "Where have you been?"
"What do you mean? I have been home, where else?"
"Why didn't you come back?" Sesshomaru takes a step forward and in reflex, I back away. "Well..Uhm… I…Because I have no time to…"
Immediately using the books and notebooks on my desk as an excuse. "T-That's right, this week is the exam week! You see, I was really busy preparing for exam! That's why I had to stay longer than before!"
Still, he frowns after hearing my explanation. Getting me even more nervous. "It's the truth, believe me!"
An awkward silence happens between us for about half a minute until Sesshomaru speaks again, staring into my eyes. "If whoever or whatever dared to upset you. Then speak to me and I, Sesshomaru shall eliminate it. No matter what it costs."
His sudden concern causes me to lost for words. And it takes a quite a moment for me to finally snap back into reality to respond. "…Yes, I will. Thank you"
Only waiting for that answer, Sesshomaru swiftly narrows our distance and caresses my face.
I restraint myself from holding that slender hand and shut my eyes tightly, slowly drowning in his warm touch and those gentle golden eyes. Your kindness… Why is it hurting me so...?
If Sesshomaru continues being too nice to me like how he is right now, I doubt that this naive and fragile heart of mine will be able to handle even just a single break.
Sesshomaru...Did you know that for days without you I have been thinking... Even if they were just wild thoughts, I wished that I should not have defended for Nanase back then. How much I regretted to have slipped her a chance to be your mate. If only had I ignored Nanase's condition and listened to Jaken, none of this would have happened and we could still be happy as we were used to be...
Love, it has turned me into such a selfish person. Don't you think so too, Sesshomaru?
.… No! I can't let myself getting carried away like this! I wake up from my daydreaming and notices Sesshomaru's about to say something to me. I cut him off. "A-Anyway, I have to return studying. So uhm... Can you please leave?"
Quickly I turn away, facing my back on him. "I'm really grateful that you're worried about me but I need to be alone right now."
Sesshomaru pauses at my cold speech for a couple of seconds before stating. "...You're avoiding me"
I flinch at his words, they are so accurate that it makes my heart aches. "What are you saying? I'm only trying to tell you that I need to study, not avoiding you…"
Now that reminds me. Isn't this the first time I'm asking him to leave? How ironic, considering he's always be the one to disappear before anyone does.
Tired, I decide to end the conversation in silent by getting out of the room. However Sesshomaru has grabbed my arm and yanks me back to face him. "What are you hiding from me?"
"I'm not hiding anything. You're overthinking it!" I protest, trying hard not to look into his eyes.
Yet my stubbornness only to cause Sesshomaru to lose his cool and tighten his grips on my arm. "You're lying!"
"I'm not lying! Let me go!" The more I struggle to get away, the more painful it gets and I yelp out loud for him to stop. "Sesshomaru! You're hurting me!"
Soon after he let go and I step a few steps back from him, trembling in fear for this is the first time he's being this angry to me.
Witness the frightened expression on my face, Sesshomaru frowns and speaks bitterly. "Fine, I'll leave you alone. If that is what you wish."
His voice is shaking and he clenches his hand into fist, so strong that I can see a tint of blood coming out of his palm. And before I can say anything in return, Sesshomaru has turned away and swiftly flown out of the window.
"Sesshomaru!" I call out to him and rush to the window, looking for the white figure within the dark sky yet he's nowhere to be found.
The next day
At Lunch
"Sogo-san, would you like to go see a movie with me tomorrow morning?" Tatsuya asks me while we're standing at the school hallway.
I tilt my head at the sudden invitation. "Movie?"
"Well, I notice that you've been down ever since you came back to school. I don't know what have happened but… I hope that doing this may be able to cheer you up." He explains, scratching the back of his head.
"It was just due to stress from studying. Don't worry too much." I smile to ease his worry. Though Tatsuya isn't wrong…Maybe this is a good chance for me to relax a bit and forget the bad memories.
"Ah I see. Then…"
"Yes, I don't see why not."
After receiving my positive answer, Tatsuya's face brightened up like a sunny day. He then arranges the time for us which is 9 A.M tomorrow and soon after the school's bell rings.
Once I return to my seat , Hana asks. "What did you guy talk about?"
"Tatsuya-kun invited me to go see a movie tomorrow." I tell them what happened.
"Did you agree?" Curious about the complicated relationship, Kasumi speaks up and I nod in response.
"So you're dating Tatsuya now?"
"Huh? Dating? Of course not. We're just friends hanging out on free time."
Somewhat feeling bad for the dude, Hana helps him send Shiomi a hint. "Uhm… You know Shiomi-chan. Maybe there is a chance that Tatsuya is interest in you?"
But the girl shakes her head in denial, as always. "Nah, you probably imagining it."
Wow, she really is dense. Poor Tatsuya... Hana and Kasumi can only look at in each other speechlessly.
Next morning
At the movie theater
"Wait here, I will go buy tickets real quick." Tatsuya tells me and I nod, "Okay."
I lean onto the wall nearby, watching him get into the ticket booth. Just then something familiar gets into my view and my jaw drops. Wait a minute, isn't that…
Sesshomaru?! I rub both of my eyes to check if I'm not daydreaming and sadly. It is indeed Sesshomaru who is standing in the middle of the street not too far away and what's worse. People around him are whispering and pointing at him. I can even hear someone nearby saying that he seems to be a cosplayer who is lost his way to a cosplay festival.
Getting panicked and without thinking, I rush to where he is and drag the guy away into a corner of the nearest building
"What are you doing here?! In the middle of the crowd like this?!" Assumed that we're safe from people's attentions, I begins questioning him. Almost shouting to his face. "It's not like you at all!"
"Who is that man? Why are you with him?" Sesshomaru ignores my questions again and shows his interest in Tatsuya instead.
My eyebrow raises, can no longer understand what this dude is thinking inside his thick head. "Tatsuya is my friend and schoolmate. He invited me out today so that's why I'm here. What about him?"
"You said you were busy." Hearing so, Sesshomaru frowns. Recalling to yesterday when I told him about needing some time alone to study.
"Uhm… Well you see… I need to take a break. I can't just study all the time" My voice starts to crack.
Sesshomaru quickly catches the uncertainty in my voice and keeps staring at me suspiciously. What the heck? Why is he acting as if I'm being caught cheating on him?! I'm not doing anything wrong, right?! Wait a minute! Did I just doubt myself?!
"Anyway please return. If you stay here any longer, who knows what disaster is going to happen." Therefore I try to reason with him. "Besides, there's no need for you to come here anymore because I will return once the exam week is over… I'm not giving up on finding my identity that easily."
Even after a long speech, the guy still refuse to move or speak and I shake my head in defeat. Then I notice the time on my watch and it states that I'm already 15 minutes late from the movie.
Figured that talking to Sesshomaru is now useless and not wanting Tatsuya to wait, I decide to take my leave. "Fine then. Do what you want. I'm getting out of here."
However before I can even take any step, Sesshomaru has grabbed my hand and stopped me from going. Confused, I shift my head back. "Sesshomaru?"
"Don't go." It's not until this very moment he asks, holding my hand tightly that our eyes finally be able to meet each other once again..