Remembrance and Renewal By Nigel Tatsuya and Avatar Arkmage
Chapter Twenty-One: Enslavement
Although Severus stormed all the way back to the dungeons, forcing anyone who passed him in the hall to step aside, his heart felt lighter than it had in months. Whether it was because he had come to terms with some aspects of his past, or because he found his little angel again, or because he had narrowly escaped death's grasp, or because the de-aged Harry gave Severus the opportunity to recapture some of the experiences that would have otherwise been lost to him, or whether it was a conglomeration of all these things, Severus could not ascertain. All he knew was that his heart felt just a little lighter.
Within the hour, Severus was standing before two boiling caldrons. He added the ingredients to each carefully, and cast the spells when the time was appropriate.
Harry, who had insisted that he deserved to do hard chores for being bad, sat at the desk behind Severus. The potion master had given him the tedious task of preparing non-magical potion ingredients. For the next six hours, Harry chopped, grated and pulverised all sorts of plant and animal matter, whilst listening to his father give a lecture on the properties of each ingredient.
"I thought you were going to scold me?" Harry queried when his father went silent.
"I never stated that I intended to scold you." Severus replied, without looking up from the caldron he was stirring. "I said I'd lecture you, and that is what I've done."
After Harry had grated the Graphorn horn into a fine powder, he rested his head on the desk. He suddenly felt very sleepy, and would rest for only a little while' he decided. Apparently, he had worked harder than he thought he had.
When Severus heard a soft snore from behind him, he turned around and sighed. It had not occurred to him before, but he recalled that younger children required at least one nap during the day. Cursing himself inwardly for not providing the boy with lunch first, he took Harry in his arms and carried him into his bedroom. He would be sure to tell the house elves to bring the boy some soup and sandwiches as soon as he woke.
Severus placed Harry onto the bed and turned to leave. Before he stepped out the door, Harry called to him. "Professor Sna- Father..."
"What is it?" Severus stopped, "Are you hungry?"
Harry shook his head, he hadn't a morsel of food for hours, and he knew he ought to be feeling quite famished, but he was not. His appetite for answers from his father however, was far from sated. "I-I wanted to ask you something...
Severus nodded, his foot still in the doorway.
"If Voldemort..."
"Don't say his name, foolish boy!" Severus hissed.
"Okay...sorry. Uh, if the Dark Lord is so mean to everyone." Harry began, recalling images of his father being hurt by Voldemort, "Why do people still listen to him? Why don't they all turn into spies like you, and all use your magics against him at once or something? You could even kill him maybe, if you all joined forces."
Severus leaned his arm on the doorway and rested his head on it. His first instinct was not to answer at all, and to tell the boy to shut up and go to sleep. But young Harry had asked a valid question. One that he himself had asked throughout his life.
How blunt and straightforward a child can be. Adults and mature adolescents usually know when to censor themselves. They know what questions are acceptable and reasonable. Children, by contrast, will speak freely of whatever is on their minds, and ask precisely the questions that they want answers to, when they so desire such answers.
Severus remained silent for a few minutes. He wondered just how involved his answer should be, as well as how much information would be appropriate. On one hand, Harry was really a sixteen year old in a five or six year-old's body. On the other, the boy had only the processing capabilities of a young child, and may not understand much of what Severus would tell him. Then again, this was the very boy who had stood up to The Dark Lord on more than one occasion before, and if fate were correct, would have to do so at least once more.
Noting the transpiring silence, Severus raised his head and slowly and turned around, hoping beyond hope that the boy had surrendered to the siren's call of slumber. The boy had been sleepy after all. He had even succumbed asleep at the work table. Surely...
"Professor Snape?" Harry said, his gimlet gaze so intense that Severus could practically feel it boring holes into his torso. "Why do people listen to Volde- I mean- Mouldyshorts, if he's such a mean wizard?" The little boy sat up and started shivering. "He's so cruel! Why obey such a cruel person? He hurt so many people, he even used the Cruciatus curse on me. Twice..."
Severus whirled around fully and ambled to the foot of the bed. He had not been there for Voldemort's return on that fateful night after the Triwizard Tournament, and hadn't known that the curse had been deployed on Harry.
" And I'd never ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever ever follow him for hurting me like that. And for what he did to my mother, my other father James and for what I saw him do to you... I want to kill him." Harry stated, his eyes glowing with the coldest green fire Severus had ever seen. "Professor Snape-father, can I come with you as a spy too? I want to kill Moldyshorts!"
"Bloody Gryffindor recklessness!" Severus hissed, "Do anything of the sort and you'll not live to see another birthday! You won't even return to your former age with that carelessness! I do not want you ever joining the Death Eaters, and you are not to go anywhere near Voldemort again! Do I make myself clear?"
"Sorry sorry!" Harry whimpered, shielding his head and covering his face. The sheer vehemence of Severus's voice frightened Harry, and once more he was worried that he'd be struck.
Severus was acutely reminded of his younger self once more when he saw Harry back away to the headboard trembling in fear. "Pot-Harry, I did not intend to frighten you." Seeing that the boy was still quivering, Severus eased onto the bed, and slowly moved to sit next to his son, making no abrupt motions as he leaned against the headboard. Wanting to prove to himself that he was nothing like his own father Lucien, who would have roundhouse kicked him for even daring to ask about the Death Eaters, Severus decided to indulge Harry just a little. "I do not want you to suffer as I, and others like me, have. Now, ask one question at a time..."
"Okay," Harry scooted closer, so that their bodies were touching. "So why do people listen to a rotten, nasty, mean, boogeyman like Mouldyshorts?"
"Harry," having never spoken to such a small child before, Severus was unsure how exactly to proceed. He choose his words carefully, "you must never tell another what I am about to disclose to you."
"Wha-what?"
Severus rephrased: "Are you proficient at keeping secrets?"
"Oh yes, I'll never tell anyone what you tell me to keep secret!"
"Then whatever I am about to say to you..." Severus felt silly doing this, but kept his face otherwise expressionless, "...stays secret between you and me?"
"Oh yes yes yes! I swear it's a secret, I promise! Cross my heart and hope to die." Harry cupped a hand under his ear and scooted very close to Severus. "Poke a needle in my eye! Jab a dagger in my thigh! Eat a cow pie...!"
"Very well, very well!" Severus nodded in concession. "There is no need for you to eat a cow pie! But speaking of eating, and as the answer to your question will be a lengthy one, we will speak further over lunch..."
"Aw come on! I said I wasn't hungry." Harry whinged.
"Nevertheless." Severus said, nudging Harry to his feet. "You've not had anything to eat since breakfast, and I, as..." he spoke softer, "your father... must insist that you not starve yourself, as you are still growing. I can better answer your questions as you have your lunch."
"Will you eat with me?" Harry tentatively reached up and took his father's hand. "Please?"
"Very well."
Harry took off at a run toward the dining area, with a very taken off guard Severus Snape in tow.
A house elf's face appeared in the flames almost immediately after Severus called the kitchens through the internal floo network. "What can we get you, good sirs?"
Severus nodded to Harry, and Harry eagerly put his head right up to the green flames, nearly head-butting the elf as he did so. He was very careful not to let his head come in contact with the flames themselves. "Hi! May I please have some soup and pudding, and some macaroni and cheese, and some of that...uhm...uhm...what do you call it...I know I had it when Cho brought some over...oh yeah, some dim sum and almond cookies, and some stir-fried pork and broccoli, and some asparagus with cheese sauce, some buttered carrots, and some chicken nuggets, and some grilled cheese sandwiches, and some grape juice, and some..."
"Harry!" Severus gently pulled Harry away from the green flames. "I thought you said you were not hungry?"
"That was before. I am hungry now."
When the elf asked Severus what he wanted, he just waved that he wanted nothing. He knew that Harry had ordered enough food to feed at least seven other people in addition to themselves.
"Come, Harry." Severus said, leading Harry to a basin. "Let us wash our hands."
Draco had been in the muggle hospital for a few days now. Paradoxically, Draco found that he was far less bored here than he had been in those times he had convelesced in a wizarding hospital, or in the medical wing at Hogwarts. Through the door to his hospital room, which was situated directly in front of the nurse's station, he found the muggle medical staff interesting to watch as they went about doing their jobs, all without the benefit of magic. The muggle nurses and female doctors were especially interesting to watch, though at a distance, as they went about their day in their form-fitting, lower leg displaying white dresses.
If he tired of watching the nurse's station, Draco never failed to enjoy the muggle telly box. No wonder muggles didn't miss not being able to perform magic! If they ever felt unhappy, about anything, they could easily be entertained by the telly box. There were always programmes airing that would cheer up even the most morose person. Draco smiled at the thought of Professor Snape watching Monty Python' on a telly. He would find it a challenge to be remain grouchy after watching that! And if he ever wanted to see how asinine muggle bad guys could be, Professor Snape should watch Robin Hood: Prince of Thieves.' Even he would surely laugh at the vacuous, strategically unsound antics of the Sheriff of Nottingham.
Draco would be sure to ask his parents if they could acquire a muggle telly at Malfoy Mansion. Surely, Narcissa would enjoy the programmes showings parts of the world far from the United Kingdom, for she had not had the opportunity to travel much before marrying Lucius. And Lucius would probably enjoy watching Jerry Springer, because the muggles on that show were so imbecilic that Crabbe Sr. and Goyle Sr. would look intelligent by comparison! Now that Draco thought on it, even Crabbe Jr. and Goyle Jr. looked like they belonged in Ravenclaw compared to some of the guests on Jerry Springer.
Draco was in the middle of watching a news report when Dr. Payne and a nurse Draco had not seen before tapped on his door and entered his room.
"Good Day, Draco." Dr. Payne said, motioning to the nurse next to him. "This is Nurse Slatter, she's new in the paediatrics department, and will be working with you on this floor."
Draco recoiled inwardly as he shook hands with Nurse Slaughter. Dr. Pain then went about examining Draco's injuries, and redressing his wounds as Nurse Slaughter took a few notes and assisted when necessary. When Dr. Pain replaced he covers on Draco, Nurse Slaughter left the room.
"You still won't tell me who gave you that black eye?" Dr. Payne asked softly.
"I don't wanna talk about it, Dr. Pain."
"Very well." Dr. Payne sighed. "By the way, Draco. Your records show that you haven't had a flu immunisation shot this year."
Draco had no idea what a floo immunisation shot' was and tried to avoid looking at Dr. Pain blankly. He concluded that floo shots were something muggles should know about. "I suppose not."
"Well then, you'll have to have it." Dr. Payne stated, withdrawing a small vial from a case. "The flu strain this year is particularly brutal, and this will only take a moment."
Draco couldn't imagine why Dr Pain wanted to shoot Draco through the floo network, but concluded that that was the way muggle hospitals discharged their patients or something.
At seeing the vial containing only a small amount of liquid within on the tray table, Draco quickly agreed. Professor Snape could take a lesson from the muggles, he concluded. No large vial of bad-tasting potion to drink, or messy powder to throw into the flames, just a very tiny one with only a few drops worth of a clear muggle potion inside.
Draco closed his eyes and tilted his head back with his mouth opened wide to allow Dr. Payne to administer the potion. Dr. Payne began filling a syringe. He found Draco's behaviour exceedingly odd, but surmised that the boy was just only trying to be funny.
"Okay Draco, roll up your sleeve."
"Huh?"
"Roll up your sleeve, please."
Draco did so, thinking that the potion would have to be applied to his skin or something, and didn't flinch when he felt Dr. Payne swabbing his arm with something cold. Yes, muggles probably did develop potions that could be applied through the skin.
The pale boy opened his grey eyes just in time to see Dr. Pain about to jab him in the arm with a NEEDLE! "NO!" Draco shouted, blasting the young physician's hand away with wandless magic. Dr. Payne dropped the needle in shock... ...the sharp tip landed in Draco's thigh.
"Draco!" Dr. Payne asked in confusion, looking somewhat stunned from the unfamiliar magical blast. "What did you just do!"
But Draco only responded with a resounding: "AYYYYYYY! It hurts! Get it out! Get it out!"
Dr. Payne, who was starting to doubt his decision to pursue a career in paediatrics and adolescent medicine, examined the area that the needle's tip had pierced, and determined that it would be suitable. He gently injected the contents of the syringe into the boy's thigh before withdrawing the needle.
"OWWWWW!" Draco groaned. "That hurt!"
Dr. Payne sat in the chair next to Draco's bed, still feeling somewhat stunned. He patiently explained about the symptoms of the latest flu strain, and how the injection he had just given Draco would help keep the youth in good health. By the time Dr. Payne made to leave the room, Draco was even more intrigued by the ways muggles, especially muggle healers, coped without the use of magic. To think that little needle could help his body fight sickness. Couple that with the Pepper Up potion, and one would never have to worry about being sick again.
Draco's attention returned to the telly once more, and he marvelled at a programme called ER' which showed muggle healers helping seriously wounded people. He was intrigued, and hardly noticed the snail's pace with which Dr Payne hobbled out of the room.
When Dr Payne closed the door behind him, he muttered to the nurses watching curiously at the station: "I don't feel well at all."
"So," Severus said, sitting at the dining table just as the food trays began appearing. Harry sat in the seat beside his father, not wanting to be too far away from him. "About your question..." He stopped when another table appeared next to the first to accommodate the additional entrees. "People follow the Dark Lord, and other leaders like him for all sorts of reasons."
"There's other leaders just like him!" Harry asked, chomping a grilled cheese sandwich.
"Yes, throughout history, all humans, muggle and magical alike, have followed leaders who can be described as cruel. Evil even." Severus started, only turning over a dim sum in his plate. "Some people follow leaders like that because it is their inherent nature to follow strong leaders. It gives them a sense of safety, and protection, whether they are truly kept safe or not. Some enjoy leaders who are in control of them, because they trust that leader to keep them safe from even more grievous threats, whether real or only perceived. They would willingly live and die at the will of their leader."
Harry stared at Severus, his mouth bulging with food. "So like when I was really small, I did whatever Uncle Vernon would tell me since I was even more scared of what the neighbours would do if they found out about me?
Severus nodded solemnly before forcing himself to continue. "Others will only follow a leader, if that leader appears to be the one who will ultimately vanquish other leaders ..."
Harry swallowed his food. "...Like Peter Pettigrew?"
"Yes." Severus said, stopping for a few spoonfuls of soup. "If anyone stronger than The Dark Lord were to appear, or even if many of the Death Eaters revolted at once, people like Peter would switch sides when it was clear that the revolutionaries would emerge victorious."
Harry looked as though he had stuffed a whole chicken nugget in his mouth to avoid making a comment that could get him in trouble. Peter Pettigrew was some one Harry disliked almost as much as Voldemort.
"Those that join The Dark Lord willingly, often are dissatisfied with how things are being run in the magical world currently." Severus went on. "Even Peter sees that the people are disgruntled with the ministry's current leadership, and would elect new leaders, were it put to a vote today."
"Then why don't they just vote for some one other than Cornelius Fudge to be minister?"
"Well for one thing, the one suitable person for the job, Albus Dumbledore, refused the post back in 1990." Severus lamented. "Scandal followed Bartemius Crouch Sr, who would also have made a suitable, though harsh minister, costing him the chance at the post."
"So only Cornelius Fudge was left?"
"Yes, and now until Cornelius Fudge is forced out of the position, we have no chance of new leadership..."
"Why?"
"That is the nature of the minister's position." Severus replied. "Unless Cornelius Fudge is caught at doing something illegal, there is very little chance he will be asked to step down, and even so, the common people in the magical world aren't given the opportunity to really choose our leaders. For all you know..."
"But isn't what Fudge did to me, you know, lying to convince people in the magical world that I was crazy, illegal?"
"It wouldn't be enough to have Fudge arrested. If lying like that were illegal, imagine how often people like Rita Skeeter and other journalists who write for publications like The Quibbler would be caught at breaking the law."
"Oh yeah," Harry sighed, munching absently on an almond cookie.
"So anyway, in addition to being at odds with the way our world is governed, people join the Death Eaters for other benefits." Severus paused to eat some macaroni and cheese. "In addition to the money, the amount of which many of the poorer Death Eaters would never see in their lifetimes, many join for power. Common people in the magical world have very little political power, but if you join an organization like the Death Eaters, one can make contributions of laundered money to the ministry in exchange for special favours from them...or you can bribe them to overlook certain illegal activities you might have engaged in."
"Like Mr. Malfoy..?" Harry mumbled under his breath. "Probably paid people at the ministry to look the other way for years. If it weren't for people like Arthur Weasley, the ministry would be really corrupt wouldn't it?"
"Yes... The Dark Lord sees to it that the poorer Death Eaters are given money specifically for the purpose of bribery. That little extra to contribute to the ministry, assures the Dark Lord allegiance from the poorer minions."
"Why would that give them power?"
"Well, take your friend, Mr Weasley, for example." Severus began, hoping he could make Harry understand.
"You mean Ron?"
"Yes. Now just suppose, whilst he is carrying out his Prefect Duties, he came upon a student who was out of his or her dorms after curfew, what is it he ought to do?"
"He should warn them that they aren't supposed to do that, and deduct points if the person argued back, or was out after curfew more than once before?"
"Now suppose that person, Mr. Weasley came upon, were on bad terms with him. Perhaps one of the students who joined in the Weasley is our King' chant..."
"That was mean how they teased him! I guess Ron might deduct points from him or her straight away? No warnings."
"Exactly, yet if that student had given Mr. Weasley a sickle or two in the past." Severus went on, hoping he were explaining himself well enough for Harry to understand. "Mr. Weasley might be tempted to reconsider. What if they were caught out after curfew a few times before, but they offered Ron a few sickles or even a galleon in exchange for him not issuing demerits?"
"Ron should still report them for breaking the rules... but I guess he might not? Even if the student is out after curfew more than once? Ron might give him or her a second, or even a third warning."
"That is how some of the Death Eaters come away with little punishment for their transgressions against our laws." Severus explained. "Similar idea."
"But what if they are caught at killing some one? Or if the ministry knows those people handing them bribes are really Death Eaters."
"In that event, the ministry would have to arrest the offender, bribe or no." Severus replied. "But if you were caught at doing something like charming a muggle car, or possessing a few dark arts objects, a few galleons could make the right officials look the other way."
"So Death Eaters get lots of money and stuff?" Harry thought out loud. "But what if they don't like to kill, or beat up on muggles or death eaters who have made mistakes? And why do they stay if they get beat up when Moldyshorts is mad... why do they let Moldyshorts... hurt them?"
Severus stirred his soup whilst he formulated a suitable answer in his mind. He was tempted not to answer at all, but somehow felt compelled to do so. "Loyalty...is one reason" he closed his eyes, undoubtedly remembering those times when he had been hurt in that manner.
"Loyalty? But why do you endure it?"
"I ... endure... his attentions... to... appear to be a broken man."
"Broken man?" Harry didn't seem to fully understand. "Of course if Moldieshorts breaks your body, you're going to look broken."
"No...I mean, I have to appear just as a man who would not dare rise against him. I have behave as though I'm too scared of being hurt worse than I've already been."
Harry pursed his lips together so tightly that his mouth seemed to disappear altogether. He was THAT angry. "I don't understand why you do that!"
"Okay..." Severus finished all the tea in his cup before continuing. "Let me explain in a way you might better understand. Take elephants in a zoo or a circus for an example... do you notice how they often have only a thin rope or no rope at all around their necks?"
"Uh huh?"
"Do you actually believe that rope by itself is enough to keep the powerful elephant from running away?"
"No," Harry paused after swallowing the last bite of his dim sum and taking another. "I'll bet the elephant is strong enough to break just a little rope easily."
"So what do you suppose is really preventing the elephant from running away? What do you think is keeping it breaking its bonds, and stomping on those in holding it captive?" Severus went on.
"It is afraid of what will happen to it if it hurts its masters." Harry gasped. "It will probably get beat, or maybe even killed! So that's what you're telling me, huh? Like before when they used to first take an animal out of the wild, they'd either keep it in a strong cage? Or tie it up with lots of chains and stuff? And if the animal fights back or tries to get away, they beat it and stuff... Oh oh...no, that's exactly what you mean about how Voldemort breaks down people huh?"
Severus nodded, gravely. "Until we have no more fight left in us."
"Whatever you do, father," Harry whinged desperately. "Don't let him make you a broken man for real!"
Having taken another bite of dim sum, Severus could only nod. Even if his mouth wasn't full, he still would have been rendered speechless. The look of the purest love and admiration, just for him, on his son's face was something he had never expected to see. Harry loved Severus. His little angel, after so many years, loved him still.
Harry put his arm around Severus and embraced him slightly. To his delight, Severus did not flinch at the contact. "Father, if Mouldyshorts leads like that, why do people who are already members of the Death Eaters even help him get new members?
"Harry, this might be hard for you to understand, but some people actually see the Death Eaters, as family." At Harry's look of astonishment, Severus hastened to explain. "Well... perhaps not family, but the group gives them a sense of belonging. Quite a few people in the Death Eaters have been rejected in some way by their own families or by society."
"By society?"
"You have no doubt heard what they say, about witches and wizards out of the Slytherin house becoming dark wizards. Add to that, the fact that many of the youths in Slytherin today have parents who are either dead or in Azkaban..."
"Well those of us in other houses have parents who are dead too!" Harry shouted. "Killed by the Death Eater parents of those Slytherin kids!"
Severus's voice grew softer. "But is it the fault of the students currently in Slytherin?"
"No... of course not, most of them were only babies or young children when my parents were killed."
"Unfortunately, that initial reaction of yours is one that is shared by too many in the wizarding world. The children must bear the blame for crimes committed by their parents or grandparents."
"It's stupid to do that!" Harry declared. "But then again, even in the Muggle World, there are whole countries who blame the children and grandchildren of the original people who did the crimes, even if fifty or two-hundred years pass. That would mean that my children, and even grandchildren would be expected to pay for what you did if people knew we were father and son."
Severus nodded. "Some have no alternative but to turn to the Dark Lord. In a way, he offers the Slytherin youth the only comfort they might have ever received for losing their parents and bearing a lifetime of guilt. Ravenclaws, Hufflepuffs and especially Gryffindors fail to acknowledge the grief that youths in Slytherin might be feel for their own parents. Granted, their parents may have been Death Eaters, some may have been directly involved in the slaughter of the parents of youth in other houses, but the Death Eater parents are still parents."
Harry regarded Severus with a heavy heart. It is in their nature for youths to love their parents, even Harry, despite his past with Professor Snape, could not help but love him when Professor Snape was simply 'father.'
Do you believe Slytherins love their parents any less than Hufflepuffs, Gryffindors or Ravenclaws do? "
"No, father." Harry said, lowering his head and busying himself with putting more asparagus on his plate. "I have to tell you something..."
Severus looked at Harry over the rim of his teacup.
"The Sorting Hat didn't originally place me in Gryffindor. It wanted to put me in Slytherin at first, saying I could do well in Slytherin."
Severus' froze.
"It's true, it only sorted me into Gryffindor because I was hoping that it wouldn't place me in Slytherin." Harry noted Severus' shocked expression. "I heard bad things about the Slytherin House even before I got to Hogwarts, what else could I have thought?"
Severus turned away from Harry.
"Is that why you're so nice to the Slytherins? Because people think they are worthless and will just go bad when they grow up? Because no one else cares about them? Even when they're sad?"
Severus nodded, still avoiding Harry's gaze. "People are cruel enough to tell some of those children that their Death Eater parents deserved to die, which might have been the case, but it still is cruel to say that to one who must deal with the death of their parents."
"I'd be so mad if you had died, and some one told me that you deserved it!" Harry pouted. "I'd want to punch them for saying that."
Severus still did not turn back to Harry, he would ask Harry more about his initial sorting into Slytherin later. "Anyway, back to your question. Because of the way Slytherins are looked down upon, they tend to stick together as a group all the more. And because Tom Riddle was once a Slytherin, the youth look up to him as something of a role model. For some, he is even seen as a pseudo parent."
"Because some of the Slytherin children don't know what having a real parent is like? Or maybe a cruel family is all they know?"
"Yes. Or sometimes it's because they want to recapture the sense of security a gang or family can offer. Those members are among Voldemort's most loyal. "
Harry struggled with this new information. He had only thought of the Death Eaters as a bunch of mindless bullies who joined with the Dark Lord for no other reason than personal gain. Sure, some of the Death Eaters were there for personal gain, and some were there because they were bullies. But Harry had never understood why some members could be so loyal, and didn't understand fully even now.
"And some Death Eaters, they were forced into joining? Like you?" Harry asked.
Severus nodded. "In my case, and probably in your Grandfather's case as well, Voldemort had much to gain by having us in his ranks. So we were coerced into taking the mark."
"You mean they tortured grandmother until you took the mark." Harry blurted out.
"What? You saw?" Severus said, more as a statement than a question. His hands, uncharacteristically, shook so much that he dropped the platter of buttered carrots on the floor.
"Yes, I saw it all, that's why I know it's not your fault." Harry said, taking Severus's trembling hand in his own. "But why can't you just leave the Death Eaters?"
"Once you join the Death Eaters, you are there for life. Surely you've not met many other ex-Death Eaters since the Dark Lord's second rise." Severus said, still keeping his face turned away from Harry as he helped the house elves clear the table, and managing to drop another plate on the floor. "The only way you can leave is by dying. Either of natural causes or by being killed."
"Why?"
Severus pulled up his sleeve and showed Harry his Dark Mark, causing Harry's scar to throb slightly. "This! This is what bonds us to the Dark Lord for life. This mark was created using one of the oldest and most dark forms of magic, seldom used since the days when wizards enslaved other wizards. Yes, even our kind once practised human slavery."
"Just like the muggles did?"
"Not quite to the scale of what muggles did, but yes, it still occurred. Slaves were magically branded to keep them from ever trying to escape. Only the one who originally gave the brand can remove the spell. These marks are no different. If any of us were to attempt escape, the Dark Lord could either send other Death Eaters after us to put us to a very painful death, or else he could just search for us himself since he could cast a simple tracking spell to find us. "
Harry's young brain rivalled even Hermione's in its speed. "Can't you hide behind wards though so that Voldie can't find you?"
"Yes, wards can disable tracking spells, but he can still cause your mark to burn. No matter where a would be ex-Death Eater could go... Voldemort can still torture us until we went insane or died. "
"So that night after the Triwizard Tournament, that task Dumbledore sent you on... it was to go back to Voldemort wasn't it?"
Severus steeled his features, but Harry could see the smallest cringe at that question. "That night I went back to Voldemort, I allowed Headmaster Dumbledore to enter my mind, and stay linked with me as I returned to the Dark Lord..."
Harry didn't miss the slightest gesture on his father's stoic features. "You went back to Voldemort thinking he was going to kill you, didn't you?"
Severus nodded as he led Harry back to the bed, hoping that the boy would be sufficiently tired enough to give him a moment's peace from this seemingly endless line of questioning. He really hated discussing these matters with anyone, especially the matter of his return to Voldemort.
Yet somehow, he felt compelled to confide in his beloved preborn angel, as he had done many times in those long years that he believed his angel to have been denied life. Severus had spoken to his lost angel when he felt most alone. Now that the angel was in the world, and staring at him with eyes very much like his Lily's, Severus found that he was obliged to answer. "Both Headmaster Dumbledore and I believed that Voldemort would have had me killed upon my return for my spying in the past. That is why I allowed him to cast a legilimens spell on me. That way, I could perform my spying activities one last time for the order. Because my death would be slow and painful, I could allow Dumbledore to learn as much as possible from the information I garnered..."
"While Voldemort slowly killed you?" Harry screamed, as Severus shrunk one of his own nightshirts for Harry to wear. "DUMBLEDORE KNOWINGLY SENT YOU TO YOUR DEATH!"
"I was damned either way! If I did not return, Voldemort would have searched for me, and had me killed the moment I set foot out of Hogwarts anyway! By feigning loyalty, and crawling back to Voldemort at one of their meetings, at least I'd be able to gather information that could help the order before my death. Either way, I believed my death was imminent."
"SO THAT'S ALL YOU THINK ABOUT YOURSELF!" Harry cried, pausing briefly to allow Severus to help him into the shrunken nightshirt. "You see yourself as only a tool for the order! Bloody Karkaroff in the first place for telling everyone at that court thing I saw in Dumbledore's pensieve that you had been a Death Eater..."
"...You looked into Dumbledore's Pensieve!" Severus interrupted, the memories of pulling the boy out of his own Penseive searing their way back to the surface.
"Yes, Dumbledore caught me at it." Harry replied then continued as though there had been no interruption. "Anyway, I'm really glad that Mouldyshorts didn't kill you... but why did he take you back if he knew you were a spy?"
"Harry, it's time for you to have your nap." Severus said, practically pushing Harry onto the bed and making to leave hastily.
Little Harry refused to relinquish Severus's hand. "If he punished you so badly the other week for just being late..." Harry's face was a mixture of horror and concern. "If he didn't kill you when you first went back, what must he have done to you for betraying him?"
"Release me, it is time for your nap."
"No, father." Harry moved his grip up to Severus' wrist and held fast with both hands. "Why don't you answer me?"
"I DO NOT WISH TO DISCUSS THIS ANY FURTHER!" Severus snarled.
"He punished you real bad, didn't he?" Harry persisted, squeezing his father's wrist now. "He took you back because he wanted you, the best potions master in Britain, creating potions for him again, didn't he? That's why on that night after you rescued me from the Dursleys, you were kept out of the meeting for the most part whilst you were making potions...cause he doesn't trust you enough to..."
"HARRY! That is no concern of yours!"
"Yes it is!" Harry shouted back, jumping up and wrapping his arms around Severus's slender torso. "It's my concern because you're my father!"
"Har-"
"I'm not finished!" Harry shouted back, shaking his father with alarming intensity. "It's my concern because I don't want MY FATHER getting hurt any more! You don't deserve to suffer like that! No one does, and I won't let you suffer any longer! I won't let you!"
Severus turned around and sneered at Harry, who was regarding him with an equally fierce glare. Not even Lily, at the height of the worst of rages, could match it. "There is nothing that can be done to release me from the Dark Lord's service!"
"I'll do anything to find a way! I swear! I'll break any law, and move Earth off its axis if I have to!" Harry bawled, rubbing his eyes fiercely. "You're my father! You're not Voldemort's slave or servant!" Harry's whole body wracked heavily with sobs. "I was conceived first! Before you were forced to take the mark! My father was a free man, and one of the best potion brewers in Britain. You're not a slave! You're not his slave! You're my father! YOU'RE MY FATHER!"
Harry threw himself onto the pillows and wailed. When that wasn't enough, Harry kicked and pounded the bed beneath him. Severus watched helplessly, not knowing what, if anything, he could do for his little boy. He had never seen a child throw a tantrum before, and did not recognize his son's strange behaviour. Instinct gradually dominated, and all Severus could think to do was to gently rub the boy's back in an effort to calm him.
Eventually, the worst of Harry's bawling subsided. The boy remained laying face down, his body trembling only slightly now. Severus knew the hospital wing would still need more potions, but for some reason, not even he could fully understand, he did not want to work on them right at that moment. He looked at his hand, still resting on the lower part of Harry's back and realized that it had not been as difficult, or as awkward as he had feared it would be. He, Severus Snape, had just comforted his own small child. The child who now depended on him. The child who loved him without reason or condition.
After a few more minutes passed, Severus decided to continue working on the potions for the hospital wing. With his heart feeling lighter than he could ever remember it feeling before, Severus made to scoot off the bed.
"Don't go!" Came Harry's muffled voice.
"I have potions to brew." Severus said brusquely.
"Can you at least stay until I'm sleeping then?" Harry implored. "Please?"
Without understanding why, Severus removed his outer robes and lay beside Harry. The boy grinned hugely and threw an arm over his beloved father's chest, snuggling up close to him to enjoy every vestige of warmth from the man's lithe body.
Severus found it odd that he did not find contact from his young son particularly uncomfortable. It was almost pleasant. He closed his obsidian eyes, listening to Harry's soft breathing, awaiting a sign that the boy might be asleep.
It was Severus who actually fell asleep first. Although he feared his dreams would be filled with horrific images of the events he had just shared with Harry moments before, they were not. Instead, Severus dreamed he was navigating his way through a muggle train station, looking for that platform that would lead him to a train that would take him back to Snape Manor. On his shoulder, enjoying the ride, was Harry.
End Part Twenty-One.