Chapter 21- Doubts
"Nice to meet you." Linc says in a gruff voice, Elena continues to stare at me, well I'd consider it a death glare but no one else seems to have noticed. "It's nice to meet you both." I say, plastering a fake smile on my face. "This is who Christian went to do the yard work for." Carrick says while entering the room. "I bet the extra help was lovely." I say in a fake girly voice, I feel seething hated rising up in me. "Well I didn't see much of Christian while he was working, as I was working myself, Elena supervised him. What I heard was excellent though, you've got a fine young man there Ana, well when he behaves himself anyway." Linc says, smirking at Christian.
"Oh I do my best to keep him in line, he was defending me when he got into that fight." I keep my voice as level as I can, of course there is no keeping Christian in line so I know that Christian knows I am down right lying. "Well I was glad this opportunity came my way," he turns to Christian, "Christian, I've got some more work I'd like you to do, if you would be willing, of course I would pay you for this as it wouldn't be for punishment." Christian looks down at his hands before answering. Elena has turned to look at her husband, before casting her eyes to Christian. "Well as much as I would love to help you out, I wouldn't want it to affect my studies, perhaps I could do some for you over summer break, before college."
"Well of course, I wouldn't want to have an impact, give me a call, your father has my number."
"Yes sir." Somehow I doubt Christian will be giving anyone a call. I realise I'm still stood up. I quickly walk over to where Christian is sat and take my place next to him. As soon as I sit down he places a hand on my leg and squeezes it gently, I place my hand on top of his and gently stroke it. I wish I had agreed to skip this dinner. I don't like the way Elena keeps looking at Christian, it's basically confirming everything I thought, in this moment I know, without a shadow of a doubt, that she is responsible for what's been going on with Christian, I just can't prove anything.
"Shall we go sit for lunch?" Grace says, interrupting my thoughts. We all stand to follow her to the dining room. I sit in between Christian and Mia. Christian is sat next to Carrick who is at the head of the table, Grace is sat on his other side with Elena sat next to her, meaning she is directly opposite me, and Elliot is sat next to her, with Linc at the other end of the table. Eight of us in all for lunch. Christians hand is resting on the knee closest to me, I hold it under the table and give it a reassuring squeeze, just to let him know that I'm here. He acknowledges it with a squeeze of him own but he says nothing.
We eat a simple lunch of grilled chicken salad, with chocolate strawberries for desert. Everyone is making polite chit-chat to each other but I sit in silence, trying to get a hold on my anger. That is when Elena finally turns on me, "So Ana, where is it you'll be going to college?" she asks in a voice as fake as the one I managed to use earlier. "I'm hoping to go to Washington State Mrs Lincoln, they have a fantastic English program." I say in an equally fake voice. I also bat my eyelashes just for good measure, this is war you evil bitch troll. "Oh that sounds lovely dear." She smiles a wide, fake smile at me. "Christian was telling me all about his plans for college. Harvard, you must be so proud of your boyfriend." Shit, Christian never told me about that really, he's only mentioned it in passing. I blush. "Is something wrong dear?" Elena asks sweetly.
"No, I just didn't know he was applying there."
"Surely he would have told you."
"No." I murmur, why would he tell her and not me?
"I was going to tell you." Christian says quietly beside me. I just nod at him.
"However will you keep this up long distance?" Elena gasps in a fake, concerned voice. She's right, how will we keep this up long distance, he's going to meet other girls, girls that are prettier and nicer than me. What if he decides he doesn't want me anymore? Out of the corner of my eye I can see Christian glaring at Elena, everyone around the table has gone quiet and is staring at the two of us. "That's enough Elena. Leave these two kids to it, they know what they're doing." Linc says sternly to Elena. Does he know what's been going on, somehow I doubt that. What will happen to us when school finishes? Elena is trying to stir things and its working. Is this what she wanted to do all along? I bet it is.
Once the desert plates are cleared we all go back to the lounge, I keep quiet, I feel like the air has been knocked out of me, how could I have not thought of this before, I guess I was too happy with Christian and too wrapped up in finding out what happened that I didn't even realise. After the holidays we have five months of school left before college. Before we have to say goodbye. Will I even see him again after graduation? I believe that he loves me and I love him, but it is so easy to drift apart. I need a minute.
"Excuse me." I say getting up. I all but run out into the back yard. I suck the air into my lungs, trying to calm myself down. "Do you know the real Christian?" a voice behind me says, I know immediately who it is. I turn around and see Elena stood behind me, a smirk on her face. "I take it you don't, if you did, you wouldn't be with him."
"I don't know what you're talking about."
"Of course you don't, you're obviously not giving him what he needs. I could tell that from when I saw him. You've made him weak."
"I haven't made him anything."
"If you knew of his past you would run. I should tell you everything."
"Then why don't you?" I challenge.
"Because it's going to be much more fun to watch as you destroy your relationship with him searching for the truth, and I guarantee that when you find out who he really is, you won't want him anymore anyway."
"What exactly did you do to him? I know you've done something."
"The question you should really be asking is; what haven't we done?" and with that she turns around and goes back into the house. Is she implying that she's slept with him? Has he cheated on me, and with her? That evil old hag.
I don't know how long I stay outside for. It must have been a while. I gasp when I feel hands slip round my waist, I know who it is. His touch feels wrong though. I step out of his reach and wrap my arms around myself. I'm trying to keep the sobs from escaping. "Ana, what's wrong?" Christian asks quietly. "Have you slept with her?" I blurt out, shit. Now it really is out there. The silence stretches between us, its almost suffocating. "I'll take your silence as an admission."
"Ana, there are some things about my past that you can never understand."
"Maybe I would understand if you actually told me, but the thing is, you're telling her stuff you've not even told me! What else have you told her? Have you told her about us? Is that why she hates me so much? Because I have you and she doesn't. Does her husband know? Are you cheating on me?" these questions just keep flooding out of me.
"Ana, I have never cheated on you, I love you."
"But you have slept with her. And then you showed up with the bruises, when you were working for her, you need to tell me what the fuck happened, because I swear I will walk out of here and I will never come back."
"You promised you would never leave me."
"That's going to be difficult with college though isn't it?"
"Don't even think that."
"Well I do, ever since she brought it up."
"Can't you see she's just trying to come between us."
"Well it looks like its working." and with that I march straight past him and back into the house.
"Elliot could you take me home? I don't feel well."
"Sure Ana, I'll just get my keys." He looks at me with a sad expression on his face, like he knows something is going on. "Is everything okay Ana?" Grace asks, concern apparent in her voice.
"I'm fine, I just don't feel good."
"Is everything okay with Christian dear? Why didn't you ask him to take you?"
"We're okay Grace, don't worry. Thank you for having me over, and again it was nice to meet you both." I say turning to the Lincolns.
"It was lovely to meet you Ana darling. I hope you feel better soon!" Elena says in her overused fake voice. I smile at her sweetly, before making my way out to Elliot's car where he is waiting for me.
"Ana are you okay?" Elliot says once we start driving. I just shake my head, the tears are staring to spill and run down my cheeks. "Let's go get a coffee." Elliot finally says. He pulls into the nearest Starbucks, they really are everywhere. I grab a table and he comes back with a coffee and a tea, he knows how I like my tea which surprises me. He really is a good guy.
"So, come on Ana, what's gone off?"
"It's a long story." I say looking down at my tea.
"I've got time. You can talk to me Ana, it'll stay between us, I promise." That's when the dam breaks, I start sobbing, Elliot gets up from his side of the booth and slides in next to me, wrapping his arms around me. He holds me while I cry, occasionally stroking my hair, this just reminds me of Christian though, how could I just leave so easily, I let Elena accomplish what she set out to do in a matter of minutes. These thoughts bring on a fresh batch of sobs, more violent than the last. To Elliot's credit he doesn't get freaked out, he continues to sit and hold me.
After the crying stops I pull away. Concern is all over Elliot's face. "I've really screwed up." I say quietly. "I think Elena was trying to break me and Christian up, and I've let her do it."
"What do you mean? Why would Elena want to break you up." I take a deep breath and tell Elliot everything, from the bruises Christian had, my suspicions of what's happened, to the conversation I had with Elena in the back yard. Elliot never interrupts me. When I've told him everything he sits quietly for a moment, before finally saying "I knew something was going on with that bitch."
"What do you mean?" I ask.
"I thought she was banging him, when he first worked there, I didn't think anything of it though, he was a much nicer guy to be around and I didn't want to get in the way of that, I didn't say anything in case I was wrong. I guess I was right, do you really think she's been hurting him though, and what does she mean by 'the things he's done'? What has he done?"
"I don't know Elliot, he won't tell me anything, he said if I knew I would leave him, but I guess I already have."
"I don't believe that for a second, you can't leave him, you guys are perfect for each other, that bitch will get what's coming to her, don't let her ruin what you and Christian have. He might have done some shitty things and he might not have, but love is strong man, and what you two have is real."
"What about when we leave for college?"
"Cyber sex." He says winking at me.
"What if he finds someone better?"
"He loves you Ana, only you. You'll work this out."
"Thanks Elliot, I wish I had a brother like you."
"Well I already think of you as my sister, I love you like one."
"I love you like a brother too." I smile at him, a proper, genuine smile, he really is a sweet guy.
When Elliot drops me home I say a quick 'hello' to my parents before going upstairs and flopping on my bed, was it only this morning when we were laying here? We were so happy and then she came along and ruined it. My phone vibrates on my bedside table, I've let it here all day. I glance at it. Eight missed calls and fifteen texts, all from Christian. The majority of the texts say that he's sorry and to call him back. My heart wrenches in two. I want to call him but I also need time to think. My phone vibrates again.
Ana, please call me. I just want to know that you are safe, then I'll leave you alone if that's what you want. C x
I want to tell him I'm fine but that would be a lie, I'm not fine, I'm heartbroken.
I'm home. Now please leave me alone. A
I succumb to the tears and I bury my face in my pillow, not wanting to resurface.