Paddy gently knocked on the room door, acting as a shield against any negative reaction but Aaron wanted to see Jackson and peered around his shoulders eager not to wait any longer. He could see Jackson not even react to their entrance and he suddenly felt scared, his insides begin to twist and he started to shake but he was still going in because nothing was going to stop him.

Hazel who was always quick to apologise for her son's rudeness jumped up from her chair to greet them. She was bright and cheery and everyone could see how fake it was and how she was clinging to normality, even she did but that didn't stop her, "How you all doing?"

Paddy picked up her note of casualness and acted in kind "We're all great." Behind, Aaron could feel his mother tense up, he was thankful she'd not gone in first – she hadn't seen Jackson since their last stand off and Aaron suspected she wouldn't have been able to keep so calm. They all firmly moved into the room but Jackson still didn't responded, he lay staring at the ceiling and had a hard set his jaw that Aaron had seen many times. Aaron suddenly felt sick, he'd been confident that Jackson would be happy to see him by now, his mouth was made of cotton and his heart beat quickened and he couldn't think what to say.

Luckily Hazel never struggled for words, she was quick to fill the silence "Have they discharged you then?"

Aaron thought it was a stupid question because Paddy had obviously already told her, he didn't bother to respond.

"Yeah about half an hour ago," Paddy added helpfully

"Bet you're glad to be going home,"

Aaron noted that Jackson swallowed hard; he watched his lips purse further together as he did.

"Yeah you're glad aren't you mate."

He just continued to stare at Jackson willing him to look back.

The room had gone really quiet and Aaron could feel Paddy and his Mum exchanging looks, he hated it when they did that – they were not discreet.

"So how are you then Jackson?" Chas chimed in, she hated awkward silences and could always be relied on to interrupt.

Jackson said nothing he didn't move an inch.

Aaron could feel himself shake more and his vision went blurry from the tears filling his eyes, he was going to have to leave without Jackson speaking to him and the thought almost made him sick. He hated an audience, hated being vulnerable in front of other but he had no choice - he was desperate, "Please talk to be Jackson."

Nothing.

"Please," Aaron took a small step forward; the other three people in the room went on edge, not knowing what would happen next. He moved his fingers to his mouth and felt them trembling heavily, the tears that thickened his eyes started to fall. He watched Jackson blink rapidly.

"Please." This last plea cracked on his lips, he sound so small and pathetic to his own ears and Aaron could feel that he was about to break down.

There was a second were everyone held their breath; the room went quiet and even the littlest noise from outside was magnified. Jackson lay so still that he could have been a statue, but then suddenly if he could have moved his shoulders, they would have dropped. He turned his head to look at Aaron, "Are you ok?" Jackson said this so quietly but the relief it gave Aaron made him think he would collapse.

Aaron's voice shuddered "Yeah," he said nodding rapidly "Yeah."

Jackson turned to look at everyone else in the room "Could you give us a minute, please".

Paddy, Chas and Hazel looked towards one another unsurely.

"It's fine, keep the door open a bit if you want just please wait outside."

Aaron watched his own mother look at Jackson intently, "I don't want a rematch from the other day," it was a warning and any other day would have made Aaron yell at his mother for interfering but he couldn't get past that Jackson was talking to him – nothing else registered.

The three of them shuffled out and pulled the door until it was open only a crack but they were still right outside listening to every word. Aaron shuffled were he stood, he wanted to sit by Jackson or hug him or kiss him or do all three, he didn't know if he was allowed.

"Why did you do it?"

Aaron swallowed "I'm sorry."

"That's not an explanation."

He chewed on his bottom lip; this wasn't about him it was about Jackson "I'm sorry I let you down."

"Was it a spare of the moment thing or did you plan it straight away?"

Jackson took a deep breath and let it out slowly, "Will you answer me."

Aaron shook his head minutely and fresh tears filled his eyes "I was always going to do it –"

"Why?"

"Cause," he placed his fingers back to his lips and they started to shake again "I don't want to be without you."

Jackson closed his eyes tightly and a tear leaked from the corner.

"Please don't break up with me, I need you." Outside he could hear shuffling and the door open a creek, "I love you and you love me so let's just forget about everything and start again." He could hear the desperation creeping into in his voice.

Jackson shook his head "It's not as simple as that."

Aaron froze and his heart stopped.

"I'm going away –"

"Away?"

"To London."

"Why?

"There's a hospital there that helps people with serious disabilities, the psychiatrist thinks it could help me."

"For how long?"

Jackson shook his head and looked towards Aaron another tear fell down his cheek "I don't know, a few months?"

"Months!"

"Yeah."

Aaron rubbed at his head frantically "Ok," he said looking around the room feeling panicked "Ok but London's only a few hours away, I can come visit can't I?"

Jackson didn't respond.

"Can't I Jackson!" Aaron felt the nausea overwhelm him again and could see Jackson looking at him strangely.

"Aaron you won't harm yourself again, will you?"

He felt true panic now "I can come and visit you can't I!" his volume was increasing and it made Paddy re- enter the room.

"Yes, you can come and visit."

Aaron felt his knees buckle and he moved towards the bed, sitting on top heavy with relief, he took Jackson's hand in his own; "I knew you wouldn't tell the police what you said. I knew you still loved me."

Jackson looked away guiltily but when he turned back at Aaron he still had a strange look in his eye, "What have I done to you?"

Aaron shrugged and traced the outline of Jackson's lips "We do it to each other – that's why we belong together." Jackson looked at him warily.

"When are you going down?"

Jackson still looked at him oddly, "this afternoon."

"I could come with you if you want, help you settle in?" He squeezed Jackson's hand, even though he couldn't feel it.

"Err, the doctor wants me to go alone, even Mum's staying up here. "

Aaron felt despondent and new tears sprung to his eyes "So when can I come up?"

"I'm not sure, I'll call you."

"You promise?" he watched Jackson look behind and turned around, everyone was back in the room, they were all sharing strange looks on their faces.

"Yeah I promise."

Paddy interrupted "It's time to go now."

"Why can't I stay here?" he felt irritated at their interference.

"Because Jackson needs to get ready and you need your rest."

Aaron sighed deeply and then leant forward "I love you," he took Jackson's lips in his own and kissed them softly, he ignored that Jackson didn't really kiss him back. It got up and turned back to the bed but was taken aback by the scared look on Jackson's face.

"You'll look after him won't you?," Jackson said this to Paddy and Chas, they nodded sombrely.

"It's you that needs looking after, don't worry about me."