Mara had never wanted a drink so much in her life. Lando stood before her, extravagantly dressed and with his usual grin adorning his face, although Mara could tell it was as artificial as the faux fur that lined his cape. She took a large sip of her frizzy fruit mocktail, wishing it had a large shot of Corellian brandy in it, or better yet, a pinch of spice.

"Lando," she greeted him, a little more coldly than she'd intended.

"Mara," he returned in a neutral tone, nodding in greeting.

"What are you doing here?" she asked him accusingly.

Lando looked at her as if she had just asked him why he wore a moustache. "Luke's my friend," he answered simply. "Is it so strange to be at a party celebrating his and his sister's birth?"

"Of course." Mara couldn't think of anything else to say and looked away for an escape, praying he'd follow her lead and not mention the last time they had been in the same room together.

"You look different." Lando finally said, narrowing his eyes as he examined her closely.

Mara laughed of his scrutiny nervously, her fingers unwittingly fiddling with the gemstones that dangled from her ears. "I've just been busy," she said dismissively.

"So that assistant of yours said when I tried to comm you. Several times." A note of annoyance crept into his voice.

"Oh?" Mara tried not to sound suspicious. "What else did he tell you?"

"Nothing," Lando answered. "He's surprisingly tight-lipped for a Corellian."

"You know I wouldn't have it any other way." Mara relaxed slightly, although she couldn't shake her nervousness, nor could she stop herself from filling the silence. "He's an enormous help, not that I need it of course. But he's only too willing to do all of the menial paperwork I can't stand. And I've been scouting new trade option, I imagine our profits will sour next year, assuming we can keep up with the demand that is, not to mention -"

"Spending time with Luke," Lando interrupted with a minor note of sadness.

Mara took another large sip of her drink to avoid his gaze. Lando seemed to shake off the melancholy almost immediately, again falling back into his suave persona.

"You know," he continued nonchalantly, "I've never heard you say so much in such a short amount of time. I hope nothing is troubling you…that nothing is weighing on your mind…"

Mara narrowed her eyes. "I'm sure I have no idea what you're talking about."

"Is this a first?" Lando gasped theatrically. "Has Mara Jade's razor sharp wit failed her?"

"Remind me while I'm still listening to you?"

"I'm not sure, Mara," Lando shot back. "Why are you?"

"Look, Lando -"

"Luke looks happy," Lando continued, gaze travelling to where Luke stood on the other side of the room. "Normally he'd be cowering in the corner at an event like this, but he seems more than content."

"He does," Mara muttered, eyes lingering on the way Luke's hair gleamed blonde in the light as he chatted with Wedge, a brilliant smile across his features.

"Clearly something's made him brighten up," Lando continued casually. "I sure hope it stays that way, and whatever it is that's making him so cheerful doesn't suddenly…fall away from him," he pierced Mara with a hard look. "I'm not sure how Luke would handle that. He's…different from most of us in that way."

"He's anything but delicate," Mara responded stubbornly.

"In battle, sure," Lando nodded. "In the Force, in strategy, in flying, he's infallible. But that's not what I'm talking about."

"You - "

"Luke!" Lando broke into a huge grin and drew Luke into an embrace as he approached, clapping him hard on the back. "How you doing, buddy? Happy 30th!"

"Thanks, Lando," Luke replied as he drew away. "Glad you could make it."

Mara wasn't sure if she should be relieved or worried as Luke wrapped his arms around her and give her cheek a quick peck. She saw Lando's eyes flicker briefly to where Luke's hand rested on her waist and cringed inwardly.

"It's seems so strange, Luke," Lando continued genially, "for you to be here with a date and me without."

"You're not here with anyone?" Luke looked briefly around the room, genuinely surprised.

"As implausible as it sounds," Lando conceded with a grin. "Even the best of us have dry spells."

Luke didn't seem to pick up Lando's brief glance at Mara, and simply chuckled. "I'm sure you'll come out of it," he said, "after all, if someone like me can…" he laughed again and pulled Mara closer.

Lando responded with his own hollow laugh, as Mara remained silent, her heart beating rapidly as she tried to concoct ways to remove herself from the situation, but all of them meant either making Luke suspicious or leaving him alone with Lando, neither of which she wanted. Instead, Lando saved her the trouble.

"Well," he began, examining his empty glass. "Looks like I need a refill." He paused a moment, before giving Luke a warm, genuine smile. "I'm happy for you, Luke," he continued as he shot Mara a warning glance. His gaze returned to Luke and he smiled sadly. "Good luck."

******

"Are you alright, Mara?" Luke asked as he divested himself of his cloak, throwing it onto the couch of his apartment. "You've seemed a little out of sorts since the party."

Mara took off her shawl and played with the embroidery without answering, sinking onto the couch next to Luke's cloak.

"Was it all the people?" Luke asked. "I know you're not used to standing out in a crowd like that. They meant well." He sat down beside her. "And I'm sure you've heard lewder jokes before." He took Mara's hands away from the shawl's beading and into his own. Mara gave him a weak smile as he stood, and allowed him to pull her to her feet.

In truth she was rattled by Lando's appearance and his veiled warning not to hurt Luke. She tried to ignore the guilt that lined her stomach heavily, instead concentrating on Luke's soft hands skirting over the soft silken material of her lower back. He glanced towards the music system and the soft inviting sounds of the Coruscant Symphony filled the apartment.

Mara didn't resist as Luke drew her closer and began to move slightly with the music. It wasn't long before she was drawn into the dance, the warmth of his body pressed against hers, his arms around her, his hot breath against her ear and neck.

"Mara," he whispered hoarsely. "I love you."

"What?" Mara drew back so forcefully she took a stumbling step backwards and had to catch herself. "What?" She repeated stupidly.

Luke looked confused. "I love you, Mara," he said again, simply.

"No you don't," Mara told him.

Luke smiled indulgently, reaching for her again. "Surely it's obvious." His smile faded, however, when he realised Mara was serious.

Inwardly, Mara was panicking. "What we have Luke, it's wonderful" she said, finding her voice. "Don't ruin it with…"

"With what?" Luke remained calm, but Mara could see he was deeply puzzled. "I can't help how I feel. And you may not love me now, but over time, who knows what might happen, if you let it."

"Luke…" Mara shook her head desperately, pulling out of his grasp once again. "You're asking something of me I can't give."

"I know you think you're not capable of this, Mara," he said softly. "But you just have to take a chance sometimes."

But Mara wasn't listening to him – all she could think about was how much she suddenly needed a hit. Luke was so trusting of her – in love with her, the ultimate proof that she had let it all run too far.

Luke put his arms around her again, but this time his touch scalded her skin. Her heart beat wildly as he whispered platitudes and promises in her ear; that she needn't worry, that they would go as slowly as she liked. All the old promises in the new ways – only now they were playing for keeps. The burden of Luke's trust and belief in her made her feel woozy, his feelings weighing her down, getting in the way of the freedom she wanted. She had to find the one thing that would make him falter, that would push him away.

So as Luke reached down to kiss her, she blurted out; "I slept with Lando."

This stopped Luke cold. "What?"

Mara let that old mask of indifference fall over her expression as she looked directly into Luke's disbelieving eyes. He seemed unable to form a response.

"I told you, Luke, what we have is great," she said coldly. "But it's not love."

Luke continued to stare at her stupidly. "When?" He finally managed to stumble out.

Mara shrugged. "When I went to Kessel after the…the funeral."

"So after we…" Luke looked as if he was about to be sick.

Mara nodded, hating herself for causing him pain, but knowing it was the easiest escape clause. If he truly loved her, he would not stop until he had discovered all of her secrets, and she could not allow that. She had to make a choice.

"Not falling victim to male pride, are you Skywalker?" It was so easy to fall back into old habits and easy taunts. "What would you like to hear? That you were…better?" She gave him a mocking grin.

Luke looked at her as if seeing her for the first time. He turned away, but not before Mara caught his wounded expression.

"You're not even going to explain?" he asked, a notable shake in his voice.

"Why?" Mara shot back. The deceit, the character came back to easily, and a small part of her enjoyed the thrill. She stepped towards him, and ran her hands up Luke's back to the bare skin of his neck. "Come on, Luke," she purred. "This doesn't have to change things. We have fun together, don't we?"

But Luke stiffened under her touch. "Get out," he responded dangerously and Mara could feel their connection through the Force freeze and shatter.

And suddenly the thrill died within her, leaving Mara feel completely empty. She backed away from Luke, attitude and emotions changing once again as regret filled her. She fled the apartment, the cold night air stinging her bare shoulders as the weight of her guilt descended swiftly. She had known how much it would hurt him – and a part of her hadn't cared. But she had cut her ties, she couldn't go back, nor rely on Luke for his support, his comfort, ever again.

There was only one place she could go now.

She'd lied. For months she'd lain in his arms, in his bed, lying to him. That was what hurt Luke the most. His pride had been damaged, his inner animal raging at the fact she had been so intimate with Lando. But if she'd explained the situation to him, told him about it beforehand, he would have understood.
At least, he hoped he would have. At the very least he would have known the truth from the start, known what he was getting into.

Hot tears stung his eyes as Luke stood in the middle of his living room, far too numb to move. He went over the events over and over in his mind, replaying everything she'd said and how she'd acted, what had gone wrong. For a part of him just knew that something didn't add up. Once again, she hadn't told him the whole truth.

Damn her. He seethed inwardly, feeling the bile rise in his throat, thinking of all the times she'd looked at him with adoring eyes, had touched him so softly…it had all been false. Anger motivating him to move, and Luke stormed down the hall and into the bathroom, furiously turning on the water in the sink and splashing it onto his face. It had a soothing effect, but not enough.

Luke looked at his reflection in the mirror above the sink, the face of a stupid, trusting farmboy who'd fallen all too easily.

And before Luke realised he'd done anything, the mirror was shattered and his fist was covered in blood. Anger was replaced by a welcoming pain as Luke covered his bleeding knuckles with his other hand to stop the bloodflow. It had been a long time since Luke had let him temper get the best of him, but it had felt so good. Luke shook that thought away instantly, immediately closing his eyes to run through Jedi calming exercises. He couldn't let his anger get the best of him, not even in a situation such as this. He sighed deeply, centring himself, packing away his anger, guilt, doubts and troubles away for later, sober examination.

But as he opened his eyes Luke spotted a small package stuck to the wall, the fallen pieces of glass revealing its hiding place. He heard Artoo rolling towards the bathroom, probably on alert from having heard the mirror smash. But Luke was busy prying away the package from the wall to examine the fine white power it contained…