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Recollection xx

I was not there. But, through the tales of others, I think I know how the whole thing played out. My own tale fits into this version, from when Aerith left me to when Cloud saved me. The small details I have guessed, but it is what I imagined what had happened.

Sometimes I find myself playing the would-be scene over and over in my mind, filtering what I know out of what I guessed. It's like a loose tooth. I can not leave it alone, and I find myself lost in thoughts of what was, what could have been and what might have been.

I guess I am stalling, so, to the point.

Nanaki had taken Marlene back to the tent, after leaving Aerith with myself. He had seen the airship. I sometimes think that he knew all along what was going to happen, or had suspected it. I had never found the courage to ask him.

I know he hurt so much. He had known her the longest of us, after all.

So, he would have gone to tent, with a sense of deep foreboding. Marlene would have been aware, I think, that he was worried. She could pick up things like that, for one so young.

She might have said something to try and comfort him. I don't know, it doesn't really matter.

They would have reached our tent, amidst the panic of the streets, to find Barret pacing impatiently. He had told me later that even then, people were afraid. The soldiers had gone onto red alert, and the people knew that something was coming.

Their beloved General.

But I must try not to be so bitter. It does no good.

Barret would have looked up, relief on his face when Marlene and Nanaki entered the tent. He probably caught her up in one of his enormous hugs, almost smothering her.

Red had told them both to say there, and had raced off to find Vincent and Cloud. They were both training. Or had been, before the Soldiers had ushered them away from the barracks.

Red would have made them race back to our tent, certain now that something was amiss. Vincent said he had heard from one of the Soldiers that a group of Heartless had been spotted inside the city.

Now, excluding Aerith and myself, they were all at the tent that had become our cramped home. Nanaki had told them about the airship, and how they were all to board it with no complaints once it arrived. I believe he and Aerith had sorted this out beforehand.

Barret had protested, saying that the men-folk had to find the female members of Avalanche before high tailing it out of there. He would have looked worriedly down at Marlene then, I'm sure.

Cloud then volunteered to look for us, refusing Nanaki's help, saying that he would be fine alone. They had made a checkpoint. Red had assured us that the ship's captain would listen to us. He said Aerith held great weight in Radiant Garden.

The airship would wait above a certain building, to pick up Cloud, Aerith and I when we reached there.

So Nanaki had led Barret, Marlene and Vincent away to meet the airship. Cloud went to find us.

It is here that most of my guesswork begins. Cloud does not talk much about it, and we do not press him to. It was hard on all of us.

After I had snarled at Aerith to run, I believe she had headed back to the tent. It was the only logical destination. Maybe she went to get help, or to warn them that Sephiroth was there, or she had run, for a moment, afraid of her destiny.

But I do not believe in destiny, or the predetermined. I think she ran because I told her too and there was nothing else for her to do. Maybe she panicked, I would of. I did, when I ran.

I wonder if she had ran with every step, thinking about the inevitable. She probably knew that I would never be able to defeat Sephiroth. Surly she knew that, sooner or later, he would be after her again.

Because that was why he came to Junon. Not for Avalanche. Not even for the city and its people. He came for her.

Somewhere along the way she had found Cloud. He would have reached out to her, to support her. Maybe his eyes widened and he verbally asked why I was not there. Maybe she told him shakily that I was fighting the General. Perhaps he glanced in my general direction, regret on his features, before assuming the worst and pulling Aerith away.

Maybe, perhaps, I don't know. He might of said nothing, just finding Aerith and deciding that he had to get her at least to safety. Maybe he guessed from Aerith's sad and panicked face that I was gone. Maybe he did not care.

But now, that is being unfair to both of them.

It is a morbid fascination, thinking about what people might feel about your own demise, and I do not normally dwell on it. I guess because I am telling you this I can afford to explore my own thoughts, from time to time.

Wherever they had met up, they did not get far past our street before Sephiroth, having left me incapacitated, had found them. The Heartless would have emerged, by then. Swarming the streets and consuming everyone. Aerith would have been weeping as Cloud dragged her away. She loved life, and the destruction the Heartless reaped forth pained her in a way I could never fully understand.

He would have appeared silently, like a wraith, before Cloud noticed him and, I imagine, doing the same thing as I, pushed Aerith behind him protectively and going after the General.

I do not know if they fought. I do not think they did. I imagine that Sephiroth had had enough playing around and wanted just to…to finish the job

Cloud, full of anger, would have charged first, of that I am certain.

This is guesswork, but it seems to be the most likely thing. Sephiroth would have dodged, easily, breaking past Cloud and running through a waiting Aerith.

Cloud's words, not mine.

'He ran her through.' In a flat, emotionless voice that masked the turmoil I knew boiled inside of him.

It sounded such a cruel way to describe her demise.

Did she know? This thought plagues me so much. Did she open out her arms in acceptance as he killed her? Did she smile sadly at an astonished Cloud over her murderer's shoulder?

I think so. She was beautiful; she would have died a beautiful death, a Lady to the end.

Cloud said there was no body. He said this, voice breaking. He said her form had just broken up, dissipating into the air as Sephiroth laughed and rose up to the dark heavens.

He had wanted to die then, I know. That's why he was just standing there, letting the Heartless attack him, when I arrived.

I had shouted out his name, breaking whatever spell that had held him. He had saved me as I collapsed, slinging me over one shoulder as he fought his way out of the Darkness.

Once away from the Heartless, he had woken me up, none to gently, before healing me with one of the three potions he had.

I had thought they were all dead. He was too broken at that time to tell me all of the above. I do not blame him for leaving me in the dark. He was too distraught at his own failure. He did not know that I knew about the airship, which is why he was confused when I said we should find it.

We had grimly fought our way to the rendezvous, the top of a tall building a few streets away. I could see it hovering in the sky as we raced there. Climbing up the abandoned buildings exit stairs, as the elevator was dead, we made it to the top. The airship threw down a rope ladder and we hauled ourselves up it, buffeted by the storm that encircled the city.

I passed out when I saw Marlene run towards me.

It was the shock and exhaustion, I think.

Authors note: Bit of an interlude chapter to establish whats happened, hope you like(as always) it is a bit of a strange one, I think.

Big thanks to all who reviewed.