When she woke up this morning, she told herself that this week was going to be a new week. She told herself that she wouldn't do it and she promised herself that she wouldn't even look towards the front of the auditorium and at him. She even told herself that she was going to act like he didn't even exist. Because starting this week, she was going to be a new person and every mistake she made last week, every bad judgment call, every tear she shed, every horrible thought and feeling...was going to be wiped away.

It was a new week. She was starting fresh. But off to a bad start.

She knew she shouldn't. Deep within the depths of her conscience, in the part of her mind that still existed enough to let her make rational decisions, she knew that she was making a mistake. With every step she took, every movement she made and every inch that brought her closer, she knew that it would be within her best interest to turn around and pretend like this never even crossed her mind. She knew that going back to her car for a little while was better than this. But for some reason…she couldn't.

She couldn't turn around and retreat back to her car. She couldn't turn around and dash out of the auditorium. She couldn't just do what she knew would be best for her. She had to make the decision that would probably destroy her. She had to make the decision that would even further propel her into the self hatred and shameful guilt. No, she couldn't turn around and make the decision that would benefit her in the end. For this one moment in time, the pain and suffering was just a little bit worth it.

How did she know that he would even want to see her? How was she to know that he wasn't feeling the same way that she was in this very moment? How was she to know that upon knock knocking on his door, she wasn't going to be turned away? Because once was a mistake. What happened last Friday was the biggest mistake they could've made and maybe-just maybe-both of them were foolish to think that a friendship could be built despite the fact that they'd had sex. She was taking a chance, taking a gamble. Nothing more than just hoping that he wouldn't turn her away once he saw that it was her knocking on his door.

She wrapped her hand around the wooden railing and took the steps one at a time as she descended further into the basement. The usual scent of mildew and rust and paint thinner encased her and for some reason, it made her feel safe. It was a scent that she knew, a scent that she could count on. She knew that each time she went into the basement, it was going to smell exactly the same. She could count on that...and that was something that she took comfort in.

She adjusted her backpack's strap on her shoulder and dragged her soppy moccasins across the floor and down the hallway. The bottoms of her sweatpants were still lined with rainwater and the pads of her sock-covered feet were dampened from the moisture that had seeped through the bottoms of her shoes. She was nervous and a little bit worried, but breathed easier when she saw light spilling from underneath his closed door. At least he was actually inside his office. It would've been a totally different feeling of disappointment had today been the day he decided not to sit in his office.

When she reached the door, she bawled her very tired hand up into a slight fist and knocked on it twice before twisting the knob and opening it before he could even give her the affirmation to come inside. Her fingertips were trembling and her head was buzzing and it wasn't until now that she realized just how badly she needed him. She didn't want him. She needed him. She missed him. Missed his face, the sound of his voice, his laugh, his smile, the way he looked at her, the way his hands felt. She missed his presence. And she hoped to god, for her sake, that he was at least up for seeing her.

She opened the door quickly, without giving herself enough time to second guess and overthink and chicken out and ultimately end up leaving.

When the door opened, Alex looked up from the stack of papers he'd just started grading and felt his shoulders tense. Admittedly, ever since Friday, he'd been on edge. Deep down, he knew that she hadn't told. He knew that the only way that anyone would ever find out what happened on Friday was if he told or if she told or if a janitor overheard. He knew that she didn't tell and he sure as hell didn't tell but still, he felt the panic rise up in him when the door opened. Because on the off chance that it wasn't her, that would mean that it was someone else and maybe that someone else was coming to tell him that he was fired for what happened on Friday.

He relaxed when he saw that it was her, though. It was just her. She wandered into his office and shut the door behind herself without even saying a word. He fought off a smile. He wasn't expecting her to come today. Somewhere along the course of the weekend, he convinced himself that their friendship was over. She hadn't been texting him back, she made no effort to talk to him and she didn't even sit at the front of the room today. He thought for sure their friendship was over and that somehow in sleeping with her, he lost her as a friend. Maybe not, though. Because there she was, standing right in front of him.

"Hey," Jo mumbled coolly and took her backpack off her shoulders as soon as the door shut behind her. He nodded his head, keeping his eyes locked on her as she sat in the usual chair across from him.

She kept her head geared toward the ground and it was something that he noticed. Usually, when she came into the room, she was vibrant and happy and smiling and looking straight at him. This time though, she was looking at the ground and hanging her head as if she was ashamed. Ashamed of what? He didn't know. But ashamed of something. And she looked...different. Granted, she was never quite the one to dress up and that in and of itself was something that he was initially attracted to, but today she looked much worse. Today, her sweatpants were two sizes too big, her t-shirt was baggy and holey and her beautiful brunette hair was tied back in a bun so loose and sloppy that it was falling out. And it looked greasy. Jo never did dress up, but she never looked...like this.

"I didn't think you were coming," Alex answered truthfully.

"Wasn't gonna."

"What changed your mind?"

"...Stuff," she mumbled and crossed her legs. She nudged her glasses up on her nose with her finger and stared blankly at the carpet on the floor. She was tired and it showed. The bags underneath her eyes were deep and purplish and her overall aura was rundown. "What's been going on with you?"

Alex wrinkled his brows at the way her voice sounded. She even sounded exhausted, which didn't set well with him. Her voice was stringy and gravelly as opposed to that natural sexy rasp it usually had.

"Nothing," he shook his head and put his pen down to give her more attention. "You okay? You...you sleep alright?"

"Not really, no," Jo shook her head truthfully and then cleared her throat. "How was your weekend?"

"It was cool," he shrugged and picked up his pen again. He figured she was hiding, covering something up, but he wasn't about to ask what it was. He figured if she wanted to talk about it, she'd talk to him about it. She must not have wanted to. "Yours?"

Jo shrugged and looked around as if she was re-familiarizing herself with the contents of his office. Something about his office seemed different this time around, but she couldn't put her finger on it. The calendar on his wall was still there, the bookshelves, the computer, the mini fridge… Her eyebrows wrinkled when she noticed what it was that was missing.

"...I missed you," she whispered.

Alex paused for a moment, stunned. He wasn't expecting her to say that but he was damn glad she did. He smirked. "You missed me...but you weren't gonna come see me… that makes sense."

"I really don't want to be down here, but-"

"Then why are you? I'm not twisting your arm. If you don't want to be down here then you're free to go."

"I had a really rough few days Alex, please don't-"

"You started it," he mumbled. "...You're the one that said you didn't want things to be awkward. You're the one that said you wanted to forget it ever happened. You're the one that's being weird. I never told you that you couldn't come down here anymore. I told you we could take this back to normal, but you-"

"How are we ever going to make this NORMAL again, Alex?!" she huffed and for the first time today, tears streamed down her cheeks. Normally, she wouldn't cry that easily. But she just… Wasn't herself today, that's for sure. "You can't just-you don't just-pretend like you didn't have sex with someone. You can honestly sit there and tell me that you can be down here with me and forget about the fact that we had sex? You can forget about that? And be normal?"

"It wasn't my idea! You're the one that said you wanted to! So obviously I'm gonna go along with that." Alex clenched his jaw and took a breath to calm down once he saw the tears. "Look. If you don't want to have sex with me anymore, I don't care. I'm not going to beg you for sex. But what I'm not gonna do is let you sit here and try to turn this all around on me. You're not about to make me look like I'm treating you like nothing but a booty call when I'm not. It wasn't my idea to forget about the sex. And it wasn't me that told you that I don't want to be around you."

"Because I don't! I don't want to be around you right now, Alex! I don't want to be down here, I don't want to be having this conversation with you and I know for a fact that I SHOULDN'T be having this argument when you're not-"

"Then why are you?! SERIOUSLY JO, if you don't want to be here then why are you?!"

"Because I don't have anywhere else to go!" Jo threw her hands up in the air and felt her throat close up as her voice cracked. "It's here or my car and I don't want to sit in my car for an hour. I don't have anywhere else to go, nobody else to talk to and I missed you! I missed you! I'm not proud of what we did especially knowing that you have a girlfriend and I know I shouldn't be down here and helping you continue to cheat on your girlfriend because believe me emotional cheating is a thing too but I couldn't help it because I missed you and I wanted to be around you and I don't have anywhere else to go I just need someone right now okay and you're the closest thing I've got to someone and I-"

"Wait," Alex closed his eyes and shook his head, sitting upright in his chair. "Back up, back up. Take a breath and hold on a minute. What do you mean you have nowhere else to go?"

Jo just remained sitting in the chair. She covered her hands over her face and for the first time since Friday when everything with Stephanie went down, she sobbed. It had been bottled up and bottled up and just pent up inside and it needed to be released. And it was released through sobs. She didn't mean to do this. She didn't mean to come down to Alex's office and throw all her issues all over him and leave them in a pile for him to sort out, but she couldn't help it. He truly was the only thing she had and she really could use someone to talk to. Her life was in shambles. Just last week, it was perfect and this week, it was in pieces on the floor. Pieces she didn't know how to pick up. Pieces she didn't know how to make fit. She didn't want him to offer advice. Hell, she didn't even want him to say anything at all. She just wanted him to listen. That was all. She just wanted him to listen, maybe tell her that it was going to be okay and then just send her on her way. That was all she wanted.

"Jo. What the hell do you mean you've got nowhere else to go?"

She shook her head and took her hands away from her soaking wet, blotchy red cheeks. Her eyes were red-rimmed and she was even more exhausted than before because crying took the last little bit of energy she had left. She could pass out at any moment.

"No, tell me. What the hell do you mean? You don't have anywhere to go?"

"I'm sorry," she whispered and stood up. She quickly bent down and picked up her backpack again and moved for the door. "I'm sorry, I shouldn't have…"

"No!" Alex sprung up out of his chair and bounded for the door. He pushed past her and stood in front of it, arms folded across her chest. "Tell me. Tell me what you mean… You don't have anywhere to go? Are you...homeless or something? Is that what you mean?"

He knew it was extreme and most likely out of the question, but it seemed to make logical sense. She was dressed terribly today, her clothes were all tattered and wrinkled, she had on glasses he never saw her wear before and her hair was clearly dirty. He knew it was an extreme conclusion to jump to, but it really did make sense to him. Jo put her head down and just shook it, still sobbing and trembling. To him, she looked so… Tired. And it wasn't the kind of tired that could be fixed with a pillow and a blanket. No. She looked tired of everything. Tired of being awake, tired of crying, tired of standing and just tired of life. What had happened in two days?

"What about your dorm?" he asked. She shook her head again. "What the hell happened?" She shrugged her shoulders. "Tell me what happened…" He placed his hand inside hers and held it. "What happened?"

"It's a long story," she whispered. "I just don't have anywhere to go…"

"I have time if you wanna tell it," he shrugged.

"I don't want to talk about it," she sniffed.

"Fine. We don't have to," he shrugged his shoulders again and just looked at her. He knew what he wanted to do, but he wasn't sure if it was a good idea. If he did what he wanted to do, he was violating so many moral codes and breaking so many university rules. But then again… They already broke the rules. The second he kissed her, the rules were broken. He was already eligible to lose his job. What's another bad judgment call? "Have you eaten anything? Taken a shower?" Jo shook her head. "Where the hell have you been sleeping?"

"...My car."

"Your car?! You've been sleeping in your car?! Why the hell… Why didn't you… You… Why didn't you text me?!" She was silent. "Since when?!"

"Friday!" she croaked. "Just since Friday. I had an argument with my roommate and I… I just can't stay there right now, okay? And I wasn't gonna text you… What would you have been able to do? Nothing. I'm not your problem."

"I would've done something," he mumbled and took a deep breath. This was breaking so many rules… But he knew what he had to do. "You're not going to your class at eleven," he sighed and ran his fingers through his hair.

Jo's head snapped up and she looked at him with incredulous, slightly angry eyes. "Excuse me? You're not gonna tell me what I am and am not-"

"Look at yourself! You're half dead and falling over. You need to eat something, you need to bathe and you need to take your ass to sleeps. You're not going anywhere. You're gonna… you're gonna… Come with me," he walked back over to his desk and grabbed his car keys and his cell phone. "Grab your bag and come on."

"Where are you taking me?" she asked but truthfully, she didn't care. She trusted him enough to know that he wasn't going to hurt her. And well… A shower sounded nice. She hadn't showed since Friday.

Alex opened up his office door and held it open for her. "I've got a… Room. At the Comfort Inn up on 67th. It's not much but… Just come on."

"What are you doing with a motel room?"

"You're not the only one that had a crappy weekend."