Rachel gawked at the image in the mirror. For only thirteen weeks pregnant, she was showing a lot. She turned in the mirror to examine the bruises and scars that were finally healing. Now all she needed to do was heal everything else that was damaged from the rapes. But that wasn't going to happen. It was now eight weeks since the first attack and she wasn't getting any better. In fact, she may have been getting worse. The psychiatrist even diagnosed her with Posttraumatic Stress Disorder.
Rachel dropped her shirt over her stomach, but sighed. It still didn't cover the bump. People were going to begin to realize she was pregnant. And she didn't really want that.
She pulled off the shirt and pulled on a pair of leggings and a longer blouse. But the bump still protruded. She gave up and slipped on a pair of boots. She grabbed her bag and headed down the stairs, where her fathers waited in the kitchen. "Hello darling."
"Hi daddy." Rachel slightly smiled as she pulled on her coat. "Finn's picking me up again and he's here, so bye."
"Bye, don't run it could be icy." Hiram said as he watched his daughter quickly leave the house.
She slipped inside Finn's car and leaned towards him to press her lips against his. "Hello, you look gorgeous…as always."
"Thanks." Rachel said, although there was doubt in her voice. "I'm showing a lot. People are going to start to notice."
"I think it's cute." Finn smiled as he glanced at the baby bump.
"But I don't want people knowing I'm pregnant. And it's pretty obvious. And I'm wearing maternity clothes. I only have those three shirts that actually cover the bump and they're not clean."
"Calm down. Just say you gained weight."
"Finn." Rachel sighed, slightly annoyed. "This doesn't look like weight gain. It's pretty clear that it's a pregnant stomach."
"Okay, but everyone knows everything else that happened, so is it really that big of a deal?" Finn asked as he pulled into the school lot.
"Well I didn't want them to know that either, but…" Rachel sighed as she opened the door.
Finn got out of the car and met Rachel on the other side. "Just calm down. Being stressed isn't good for the baby."
"I know, it's just a little hard to not be stressed." Rachel said as she intertwined her hand with Finn's.
"Well you can relax. Today's the last day. Then we have a whole week off for Christmas."
"Finn, it isn't just school that's stressing me."
"What are you stressed about?"
"Everything." Rachel spoke lowly. "The baby, h…him not being in jail, the trial…"
"Woah, hold it. The trial is not for a while."
"Okay, but my dad has already been talking with the lawyer and she's getting evidence and she wants to talk to me soon."
"Rachel, I'm going to find some way to relax you."
"It's impossible. I…I can't get my mind off of…of what happened. You know that. And you know the only way to do that for a few minutes is…" Rachel's voice trailed off as they entered their first class.
"Have you been sleeping better?"
"No. It's been getting worse. I can't close my eyes without…seeing it. And when I finally do fall asleep I wake up within the next fifteen minutes because of a nightmare. Except…the nightmare actually happened." Rachel whispered.
"But you need to be sleeping. It's not good for the baby."
"Shh!" Rachel quieted.
"I'm sorry, Rach. I didn't mean to."
"It's fine. I don't think anyone heard." Rachel said, glancing at the people around her. "And I've been trying, but I just can't. I'm trying to do everything I need for the…the baby…" She whispered. "But it's hard with everything that happened."
"I know. We'll talk to Dr. Russo about that. Maybe she can give you some sleeping pills."
"I'm not taking sleep pills! That's not healthy!" Rachel snapped angrily.
"I'm sorry. It was just a suggestion." Finn spoke soothingly, reminding himself that her pregnancy hormones were crazy.
"I'm sorry. I didn't mean to snap at you. I can't exactly help it." Rachel said, glancing down at her baby bump.
"It's fine. I understand." Finn sighed. "I just wish I could take your pain."
"I just want it to all go away." Rachel's bottom lip began to quiver as she fought back her tears. "Sometimes I wish I would just go to sleep and never wake up again."
"Rachel, don't say that." Finn looked at her concerned as the late bell rang throughout the school.
Throughout the day Rachel received strange looks and she swore that people were staring at her stomach. She didn't doubt that they figured out that she was pregnant, but Finn continued to tell her she was just worrying.
As Rachel headed to lunch she suddenly became nauseous. "Hold on Finn." She quickly said as she darted to the bathroom. She threw the stall door open and quickly pulled her hair back, just making the toilet. She winced as she felt her back ache. When she was finally done, she slowly stood up and flushed the toilet. She rinsed her mouth and splashed her face after washing her hands.
She then left the bathroom where Finn waited outside. "Sick?"
Rachel nodded. "Just one more week and the morning sickness should stop. I don't know why they call it morning sickness when it's not just in the morning."
Finn shrugged and took her hand again as the entered the cafeteria. The entire glee club sat together as they have been for a while now. He looked over as Rachel as she slightly winced and slumped in her chair. "You okay, baby?"
"My back is killing me."
"Oh the joys of being pregnant." Quinn grinned sarcastically.
"Let me help." Finn pulled Rachel out of her chair and onto his lap. He gently rubbed the small of her back, working out the tightness.
"That feels good." Rachel whispered resting her head in her hands.
"I'm guessing you haven't been feeling well." Kurt frowned as he took a bite of his sandwich.
"I feel terrible. I get sick at least once during the day, my back is killing me, I'm exhausted and I can't sleep, I have these weird cravings, I have to pee all the time…"
"And your boobs are swollen and hurt." Quinn finished with a smirk.
"Yes." Rachel sighed as she moved back to her chair. "And I'm showing. A lot. It's really obvious. People are going to start to realize. I think they already have. Did you show this much?"
"Not as much as you. I started showing a lot when I was later into the pregnancy." Quinn replied. "But you're small that's probably why you're showing so much."
"Hey Rachel." A football player called as he slid his chair next to hers. "Is it true that you're pregnant?"
"Who told you that?" Rachel asked and Finn and Puck prepared themselves to throw the guy away.
"Everyone's talking about it. Everyone noticed your baby bump." He said as he pointed to her protruding belly. "Normally I don't like pregnant women, but you still look hot."
"Okay, that's it." Finn growled as he stood up. But the guy left, before neither Finn nor Puck had the chance to do something.
"I told you it was obvious." Rachel sighed, resting her hands on her belly.
"I'm sorry, I was just trying to make you feel better." Finn said softly.
"It's fine. I don't care that they know. I have enough to worry about." Rachel sighed as she rested her head in her hands. "I think I might fall asleep right here."
"Do you want me to take you home?" Finn asked as he gently rubbed her back.
"No. I'm not going to sleep. If I did fall asleep it would only be a matter of minutes before I woke up from a nightmare that happened."
"You still can't sleep?" Mercedes questioned with a slight frown.
"No. I sleep at fifteen-minute intervals at the most and when I wake up I'm too afraid to go back to sleep. It's like every time I close my eyes…it's…it's happening again." Rachel spoke in a low voice, feeling the urge to cry again. "And it's not healthy to barely get any sleep and I'm not worried about me, but I'm worried about the baby."
"When I can't sleep, my mom reads me a book." Brittany said as she slipped the slice of pizza into her mouth.
"Thanks Brittany, but I think this is something more than just not being able to sleep." Rachel sighed.
"Therapy isn't helping?" Puck asked.
Rachel shook her head, taking a sip from her water bottle. "She doesn't do anything. She thinks she knows everything and she doesn't. She doesn't understand what I'm going through."
"Rachel, you have to give her a chance." Finn said.
"I am." Rachel said, raising her eyebrows.
"Why aren't you eating anything?" Kurt asked, concern in his voice.
"Because if I do, I'll be spending the rest of the school day throwing it up."
"But you're eating, right?"
"Yes, Kurt. Believe me when I'm not sick, I'm eating the weird foods that the baby is making me crave. Like pickles with peanut butter."
"Ewe." Santana cringed.
"Yeah, she's eating. I make sure she takes care of herself." Finn said as he took her hand.
"Yeah, please take care of yourself, Rachel. We've been really worried about you." Kurt said, meaning his words.
"I'm fine." She said, but she wasn't convincing anyone. She even knew that she wasn't fine.
People began to pile into the hallway as the bell rang throughout the school. The glee club stood up, threw out their lunch, and headed to their next class. The rest of the day went by quickly, considering it was the day before break. But they really didn't do anything in class except for watch movies.
Finn and Rachel sat in the front row as they waited for everyone else to arrive to glee club. It was only a few minutes before everyone arrived, including Mr. Schuester. "Okay guys, does anyone have any holiday songs they'd like to sing?"
"I would like to sing a song, Mr. Schuester. Even though I'm Jewish, I still love Christmas." Rachel said as she stood up.
"Okay, go ahead Rachel."
Snow falling gently on the ground To spend this special time of year with someone who Walkin' with you in a winter's snow Ooh, you make the season bright We'll stay up late tonight Walkin' with you in a winter's snow Ooh, you make the season bright And the bells are ringing when I hear you say Walkin' with you in a winter's snow Ooh, you make the season bright Walkin' with you in a winter's snow Ooh, you make the season bright
'Tis is the night before
And in my heart there is no doubt
That this is gonna be
The brightest holiday
'Cause here you are with me
Baby, baby, I can't wait
Makes me feel the special way that you do
Kissin' underneath the mistletoe
People smiling everywhere we go
It's Christmas Eve and they can see we're in love
With the lights reflecting in your eyes
All my dreams are comin' true tonight
It's Christmas Eve and I can see we're in love
Decorate the tree
Just look into my eyes
And I will tell you truthfully
That I don't need no Santa Claus
To hear my Christmas wish
I got you in my arms
And what could be a better gift
Than to spend my very favorite time of year
With the one I really love so near, Oh Yeeeaahhh
Kissin' underneath the mistletoe
People smiling everywhere we go
It's Christmas Eve and they can see we're in love
With the lights reflecting in your eyes
All my dreams are comin' true tonight
It's Christmas Eve and I can see we're in love
We'll do it all again on Christmas Day
I can't wait
Kissin' underneath the mistletoe
People smiling everywhere we go
It's Christmas Eve and they can see we're in love
With the lights reflecting in your eyes
All my dreams are comin' true tonight
It's Christmas Eve and I can see we're in love
Kissin' underneath the mistletoe
People smiling everywhere we go
It's Christmas Eve and I can see we're in love
With the lights reflecting in your eyes
All my dreams are comin' true tonight
It's Christmas Eve and I can see we're in love
"That was beautiful Rachel."
Thanks for reading! I just want to make it a little more clear about the pregnancy timeline since some were confused. Pregnancy starts with the first day of your last period. So Rachel had her period thirteen weeks ago. I hope that made it a little more clearer. Well I hope you enjoyed! Stay tuned for some upcoming twists! Happy Holidays! Review!
P.S. The song is called Christmas Eve, by Celine Dion.