Chapter Twenty-One
"Flip for it," says Chase, holding up a quarter in front of Cameron in the bedroom. It's the first week of June and the new eighty hour a week mandate schedule was implicated at the hospital. For some of the employees at the hospital a lot of people viewed it as a temporary goodbye for overtime at the moment. Unfortunately, for Cameron and Chase the first week of the month for them started off with Liam getting a cold. Knowing that one of them had to stay home to look after the baby during the day the two of them went with the usual flip a coin routine to determine who look after Liam first. Cameron took the first watch while Chase went to work in the day and then they rotated once he got home and Cameron went to work the night shift in the ER. Two days passed and Liam developed a low-grade fever, but luckily for them it wasn't anything life threatening.
Chase tossed the quarter in the air and caught it in his hand and flip it over. "It's tails." He says out loud before letting out a cough. Today it would have been Cameron's day to stay home during the daytime to look after Liam while he worked. However, the indication of a cough and raspy voice indicating a sore throat told her otherwise. Cameron figured out that somehow her husband has caught their son's cold.
"It's an obvious choice today that this coin toss doesn't count," Cameron says, placing a hand on his forehead. "The cough, sore throat you caught Liam's cold. It's a given choice since two boys are now bedridden buddies you're staying with him."
"Oh come on babe I'm fine look see there's nothing to worry about." Chase replied, unfortunately letting out another cough. For Cameron, she instantly took out the thermometer and presented it to him. He nodded sarcastically as he stuck it in and his mouth twisted in a frustrated expression once they heard it beep. "I can handle it babe look I've been to work many times with a cold."
"Ouch not with a temperature of 101 degrees," Cameron replies, reading the thermometer, "Nice cold you got there Dr. Chase."
"What cold?" He said innocently in a raspy voice.
"You know what I'm calling Cuddy and asking for a personal day today to look after my boys," She grinned picking up the phone. "We're not working on any new cases since House reluctantly agreed to help on consultation with Wilson's case on Mia Evans. What you two need today is me to be your nurse and as first order of business get yourself back in bed. Once I finish calling Cuddy I'll get you some fluids and medicine."
"So you're going to be my personal nurse today?" He grinned a seductive smile.
"Don't forget you're sharing me with another patient of mine a ten month old baby with blonde hair and blue eyes." She added while talking to Cuddy on the phone in between their little playful banters. After she finished talking to Cuddy on the phone, they heard the wails of their son on the baby monitor in their room as she went to retrieve him and brought Liam back to their bedroom. "Okay we're good for the day. Oh by the way the patient you're sharing with me you like to call him as your son."
"I feel bad making you stay in for the day to take care of me and Liam. I'll be fine I could look after the baby since we're both bedridden." He sighed watching Cameron now change from her work clothes into a t-shirt and sweatpants. She placed Liam down on the bed for a moment and went to help Chase change into a t-shirt and a pair of pajama pants. It was a selfless act she did to give up a day's worth of work to look after him, even when they knew now they couldn't work as many hours they used to.
They talked about the notices she received in the mail from some of the collection agencies some of her debts were forwarded to. Every fiber in him told him that money was tight and it was becoming an issue though according to Cameron kept assuring him she had it under control. The common phrases of "it's all under control," "it's nothing to worry about," or "I'll be fine let me handle this" were the common phrases that Cameron has been using for the last month. As much as Cameron wanted to go to work today, she had a priority to help her sick husband and son get better. The last thing she hated seeing was anyone in her family ill. Even if it meant sacrificing a day's worth of work, it didn't matter to her.
"And whose going to look after you Robert? It's okay it's all under control I know how things are looking at the moment it doesn't matter. I'm a tough person I'm able to handle things." She picked up Liam and went to retrieve some medicine and fluids for both of them. Once Chase was quickly relaxed and fell asleep after taking the medicine. she kissed his forehead. "You know you don't have to be so strong all the time."
"Neither do you." he muttered in a sleepy breath. "But it makes me appreciate you more everyday."
"Rest up I'm going to look after the both of you today," she murmured as she placed a kiss on her now sleeping son's head, watching the baby doze off to sleep. "I love you both."
The entire morning and early afternoon Cameron did most things that usual stay at home parents did. Chase moved into the living room to keep her company while she tidy up, cooked and did some laundry. Despite some protest and arguing between one another in the end she let Chase park himself on their couch for the day in the midst of blankets and pillows she set up for him. The medicine and cough syrup, along with the baby monitor was placed on the coffee table in case Liam needed anything. Of course, Liam started crying again and this time Cameron was on top of things as she went to the nursery to retrieve him while Chase rested on the couch.
Chase was still under the weather, a bit drowsy from the cold medicine he took. Her husband was a good patient to say the least, however Liam was another story. Cameron's anxiety was getting the best of her knowing just the ordeal Liam has been through before his first birthday. Even a slight cough or cold freaked her out beyond recognition, fearing that one little slip up could turn into a drastic medical emergency. Later in the early afternoon, Cameron placed Liam in his high chair to recheck his temperature which indicated that his fever has gone down. However, her son's cough was still bothering him and Liam proved to be a difficult patient when it came time to give her son his cough medicine.
"Come on baby open up for mommy," she pleaded with the toddler, holding the spoon in her hand containing the medicine. "Can you open up for mommy? This will help you feel better." The baby just stared wide eyed at her, keeping his tiny mouth closed and staring at her with curiosity. Cameron tried every technique to give Liam his medicine, but it was evident that the baby had a little stubborn streak to him. It was something he picked up from Chase and their son was displaying it.
She tried a firm directive approach where she instantly tried to force Liam to take the medicine. Then it happened again, the stubborn streak got the best of her as Liam hit the spoon causing the medicine to fly into his mother's face."You know you're making this difficult for me right kiddo?"
"Let me guess he's playing the game where he refuses to take his cough medicine?" She saw Chase take a seat at the table next Liam watching him back away from the spoon again.
"I could thank someone for giving our son the traditional Chase family stubborn streak. He splashed one teaspoon attempt in my face."
"Don't worry you get use to it. Yesterday the kid swung his stuff bear McCoy at me when I tried to give him his medicine Ally."
"Are you sure you should be up? You should be resting." Cameron replied, looking at Chase. "I made some chicken noodle soup for you if you're hungry."
"Thanks babe I'll have some later." Chase answered, ruffling Liam's hair. "Come on little guy don't be a stubborn lad for your mommy." This time Chase tried his hand on giving Liam the cough syrup, but the same results ended with no prevail. "Okay mommy you could try your hand at it again...after all I'm also sick too."
"Wow thanks for your assistance, daddy," she grinned at Chase with a sarcastic smile trying another teaspoon attempt. "Okay Liam here it comes. Mmmmm, vrmmm." Once again he closed his mouth to avoid the cough syrup. "Oh come Liam, it tastes really good. Please? One teaspoon for mommy?"
"Anymore bright ideas?" Chase pondered smiling and grinning at his wife's futile attempts. However, the devious plotting wheels in Cameron's head was turning and she had an idea that popped into her mind.
"Watch this." Cameron repeats the same routine once more, but this time she pushes the spoon of cough syrup into a surprised Chase's mouth. It caught him off guard as Liam turned towards his dad watching his expression change. "Smile honey, your son is watching."
"Mmm," he smiled against his will, getting first hand the aftertaste of some awful cough medicine. "Oh gosh...we're going to have a talk later, babe."
"Keep smiling Robert, the baby is waiting for daddy to swallow."
"Mmm...this stuff taste is terrible. Feels like car oil in my mouth thank you mommy."
"But you're not coughing are you?" Cameron grinned watching Chase nod his head to Liam. "Okay Liam, all right that's it. No more fooling around. This is the last teaspoon and if daddy can digest this stuff so can you. Now you're going to take it, and you're going to feel better got it young man? You're going to do this right, now mommy says open up." This time it amazed them that Liam started taking the cough medicine and swallowed it down. Cameron smiled watching him finish the teaspoon of medicine. "See that wasn't so bad huh honey? Mommy and daddy are proud of you."
"That's my little guy," Chase smiled giving a kiss to both Cameron and Liam. However, the aftertaste of Liam's cough medicine can still be felt on his tongue. "Good boy you did well. Now if you excuse me, daddy needs to go to the bathroom and use some mouthwash to rinse out this terrible taste of a little boy's medicine."
"Hey Robbie...thank you and sorry about the little stunt," she sincerely smiled at him. "I appreciate the help."
"Right back at you babe...anything my two most favorite people in the world." Chase replied back heading to the bathroom.
After Chase finished up in the bathroom he went to retrieve his cellphone from their bedroom to see if it finished recharging. His attention was diverted by the sound of a pager buzzing in his messenger bag. It slipped out of his mind for weeks in his bag and forgot to return. He forgot he still had Jenny's pager in his bag after she dropped it that day outside the OR they argued over Mia Evan's condition. Unfortunately, he didn't have Jenny's emergency pager, instead he had her "other pager" for her other job. It was spewing with messages of missed deliveries and pick ups referring to her by her street name "Little J." If he knew that the pager he had was Jenny's drug job pager he would instantly have destroyed it, but instead he turned it off and hid the pager in his drawer, hoping Cameron wouldn't find it.
Something in the back of his mind gave him two ultimatums: destroy the pager hoping that Jenny will get out of the game but at the price of having some big heavies come after her. The other choice was to return the pager and let her relapse as she always does when she is in need of a fix. Why was he worrying about a woman who thinks that drug dealing serves as a purpose for financial support? However, she did have a point and reminded him on many occasions to stop worrying about her since Chase is no longer her responsibility. Chase did a responsibility: to his family. He needed to remind himself everyday of that because he needed to do the right thing for them and only them.
It took a few moments before Cameron managed to get Liam back to sleep. With his medicine taken and his lunch fed, the little toddler was sound asleep for his afternoon nap in his nursery. She sat in the rocking chair watching her son sleep and started taking notes on the notepad she had in her hand. It was something she needed to keep herself occupied with and taking note of possible solutions to her financial troubles. The honest truth was she chose to deliberately tell Chase that she had everything under control for the sake of unburdening him of her mess. The reality is that it pained her to see the toll it was taking on their family.
She was grateful the last couple of months Chase contributed portions of his paycheck to help Cameron out. He was truly something special but at the time the guilt of taking her husband's hard earn money to accommodate her financial troubles wasn't part of the deal. She kept jotting down notes of a list of various things writing next to them a value price. Cameron came up with the solution during the weekend when she was cleaning out the closet in the guest room she intended to plan a couple of collectible items, in particular a few important momentum items she kept over the years. Sometimes giving up the things that had sentimental value to her had to be done to make ends meet she believed.
"What's with the list?" She looked up and saw Chase overlooking her list she wrote down. "Is the little guy sound asleep?"
"Pretty much he's down for the afternoon his cold should be down in a couple of hours." Cameron replied. "How are you feeling? You should seriously be resting babe."
"I'll rest up in a bit just thought I spend some time with you and our kid." Chase said putting a hand on her shoulder. "A list of things and surprisingly each of them has some sort of price listed next to them. Do you want to explain?"
"I did a bit of research and I talked to my mom. She had this contact number of this antique and collectors dealer that resided in New Jersey. She was looking to get my dad a vinyl collectible edition of one of Billy Joel's albums for my dad's birthday a couple years back." Cameron answered. "I made a list of a couple of things I had lying in the closet in the guest room and apparently a lot of it is worth value."
"Do you intend on selling all your personal stuff?" Chase asked eying her with concern. "Or have you...oh Ally you shouldn't. I mean you said so yourself you weren't resort to ever selling any personal possessions you have."
"If it pays off my debts then yeah why shouldn't I?" Cameron replied back defensively. "I'm getting money and I already pawn some of my stuff for cash and paid off some of the outstanding balance for Liam's liver transplant. I've been selling off stuff since Liam's second hospital trip and after I lost my job at Children's Memorial. Does it hurt selling off my personal items instead of traditionally keeping them in storage? Yes it sucks but at least I don't have to put..."
"Put me through what?" Chase asked suspiciously. "What's wrong?"
"I didn't want to keep on obligating you to donate half your paycheck to me to help me clean up my financial mess. It made me...feel guilty that all the money you're earning is going to clear off my debts when it should be used for yourself, or for Liam's sake and needs. When we remarried Robert the last thing I didn't want to burden you with is taking care of my financial messes. This is my mess and if I keep asking more than you could handle I feel that it will make things worse."
"You feel guilty that I'm using half the money I've been earning to help bail you out? What would give you that idea that I'm obligated by you to help fix your financial mess? Allison you have to understand we're married and whatever problems either one of us has we got to face them together. I chose this and it's my choice to help you because you're my wife and I don't want you to go through this alone. I said I take care of you and I mean it."
"I know you will but I also need to lookout for myself too if you can't be there for me at times. This is my problem...and mine alone." Cameron sighed trying to make him understand. It wasn't about that she didn't mind the help because Chase has already done too much for her when she first came back. It was about regaining her sense of independence, the thing she had to act on during that time they were separated. She felt like she was losing touch of it and if she didn't assert her independence, she feel guilty for being forever dependent on Chase's generosity.
"Okay you want to regain your sense of independence...the one that kept you going when I wasn't around right?" Chase asked gently gripping her hand. "I understand you want your independence, the ability to do things for yourself I don't want to take that away from you. I know you're a strong willed person with the urge to keep going. It comes to show that I'm unable or I have the inability to take care of my own family. Apparently I'm getting the sense that I'm at fault for costing you your independence when all I've been doing for months is doing what is best for you and Liam."
Hoping to let their son sleep peacefully during his nap, the two of them took their conversation outside to the living room. One reason for that was their son was still sick and hoping that didn't disturb him while he napped. However, their conversation was starting to turn out into an all out argument. Cameron knew at times Chase was stubborn to get some rest especially when he had a flu, but now she had to justify and defend herself when their conversation suddenly got blown out of proportion.
"If you have something to say then say it Robert." Cameron sternly answered. "Apparently I might have struck a nerve in you."
"What more do you want me to do?" Chase asked getting a bit frustrated. "When someone is trying to offer you help you have that need to resist it and assert your sense of independence. The reality Allison is that sometimes we all need a little help and I promised you that everything will be fine."
"You keep saying that but how can you promise something without acting upon it?" Cameron suddenly answered. "You try to keep all these promises to me but we know that promises are hard to keep!"
"I'm trying here but you tend to be stubborn and decide that to prove that you're an independent individual you try to take on everything yourself. I'm your husband can't you trust me to help you? I've been with you all this time through all the rough patches, the fear of losing the one thing we created together, through tying up loose ends with the past, finding closure with regrets. I make promises and when I say every promise I make I act upon it to fulfill it. I chose this when I chose you and everything that came with it. Now tell me...what is stopping you from letting me help you?" It was something that Chase wanted to know. When Cameron told him the same thing that was similar with his conversation weeks back with Jenny it struck a nerve in him. She was afraid of being let down and in return she feared of letting herself down.
"Because if I demand too much from you...I know you're going to leave." Cameron timidly answered. "I'm use to it because everyone I cared about in my life either abandons me because of the choices I made or dies on me. I try to ask or accept help from someone something tells me in my gut that it never turns out good. Even if your intentions are good how long will you think this will last?"
"You doubt if I could be there for you and Liam and if anything were to happen you fail on being independent to do this on your own. I'm not going to abandon you I will be here and I'm not putting a time limit on how long I'm going to be with you. I'm not one of those people who will turn your back on you because of something in the past. Please I'm begging you to believe me when I tell you I will be there and every promise I say to you I will guarantee to you that they'll fall through. This isn't something you need to do alone...you have to trust me okay?"
"I'm not trying to blame you for anything here and I'm not saying you're taking my independence away." Cameron assured him. "I just feel...I already ask too much from you and that you're still with me because I had your baby. I mean seven months ago I show up unannounced back at Princeton with a sick baby who was dying. Less than 48 hours after returning I dump this bombshell on you telling you that you're a father and that when I left you for a year I was pregnant with you child. I mean I fucked up big time in a year and my sense of independence was something I had to fallback on...or that's what I thought. If you had the chance you could have ran and left me holding the baby or be angry with me for leaving you."
"Now why do you think I'd be the kind of man that will do that to a woman who I pined for all this time?" Chase replied as the two of them took a seat on the couch. "You feel that your independence has been lost but you still have it with you all this time. You know how you kept saying earlier that Liam had my stubborn streak I think he'll have your independent sense. You're strong willed and determine I get it, but even sometimes the strong willed and determine people also need to turn to help sometimes. Whenever you start doubting I'll gently ask you...do you trust me? So I'm asking you Allison Cameron-Chase, do you trust me?"
"I trust...I trust you Robert Chase." She slightly smiled leaning against his shoulder. "You have good intentions I understand and you're a good father to Liam. I mean after all you took us in and you took me back after everything that happened. We renewed our vows because we believed in what we had going. I believe you because you're the one honest person in my life and despite everything...Liam and I we trust you with our lives because you love us too much."
"When I say I promise everything will be okay do you trust me to fulfill my promise to you?" Chase asked sincerely.
"I will...I do trust you." Cameron simply answered giving him a kiss. By that time she helped Chase get resettled on the couch to rest up from his flu. It seemed like their conversation made him feel a little tired and weary that she had him take some medicine once again a few hours later. She was still gaining her sense of independence, however she held onto Chase's promise close to her heart. Chase is her husband and there shouldn't be any doubt in her mind that he'd will ever let her down or that she will let him down.
A little while after, Chase began to doze off to sleep having Cameron take care of him. "You must love being my nurse don't you?"
"Come on don't you trust me on taking care of you?" She sheepishly smiled. He made some room for her on the couch as he wrapped his arm around her as she settled next to him. "You know eventually you'll get me sick...but I don't mind."
"Yeah and this time you'll trust me to look after you babe if that happens." He replied back as they doze off for a brief afternoon nap.